The Shape of a Circle | Everyday Discipleship

Our boys need a lot more from us than the traditional "birds and bees" talk.  Boys need dads who take on the big topic of sexuality as a series of age-specific conversations, not just one fire hose experience in fifth grade!  What do all these funny words mean when I start hearing on the school bus?  How should I use all these new drives and hormones to get closer to a girl relationally and respectively?  When I've been dating for a while, how will I know how far is too far?Dads and guardians of any son age 10-20, this Journeymen conversation is for you.OUTLINE & DISCUSSION STARTERSTalk#1 Introduction.  What is “Sex?”3rd-5th Grade. “What are we talking about?”Have you had your first talk?  If so, tell us how it went.  If not, talk about why you think it can be hard for us fellas to start the first sex talk.What would be your way of making these talks more fun for you and your son to talk man to man?Talk#2 Definitions. All the Words You Have or Will Hear.5th-6th Grade.  “Does my Dad know more than my punk friends on the bus?”Talk#3 Relationships.  Connecting the Dots between Physical Attraction and RelationalProgression.6th-8th Grade.  “I’m noticing girls and might even talk to one someday soon.”Talks 2 & 3 are a lot about discussing “logic” with your boy, so let’s pass our best advice and logic as we’d like to give it to our sons.  What’s your best explanation on why learning to relate to a girl is/will be worth your son’s time?  What’s your best logic on how porn will be destructive to our boys’ sexuality?  What’s your best logic on how sex is best saved for marriage?Talk#4 Boundaries.  How far is too far?8th-11th Grade.  “I have a girlfriend. It’s lasted a few months.  I’m getting comfortable with her and she’s getting comfortable with me.”Offer your thoughts on balancing the following:Parenting a high value for young ladies and their bodies but also parenting the caution that she might be the one leading you down the wrong path.Parenting your son to take the lead on the right choices but also parenting them to read and respect her choices.  Parenting directly on Bible values but honestly admitting where the Bible is unclear and entrusting him with to participate in the setting of values.  Talk#5 “Dad, I’m getting married.”20’s-30’s.  “I don’t want to be an idiot in bed.  I don’t want porn to be my tutorial.  Please don’t assume that I’ve learned everything I need to know on my own by now.”What insight on sexuality do you wish someone gave you for the early years of marriage?

"False-Self" is a term with clinical roots and discipleship outlets.  It's kind of  hard to get a quick one line explanation of what it is, but if you trust the process you'll find a piece by piece discovery of what we made that's other than what God made our self to be, which opens for you a deeper journey of surrendering your whole self to him.

Maybe you're not used to journaling, so Brian and Cammie talk out where, why, and how to start as part of your discipleship with Jesus.  It's not as feminine as you may think!  Promise.

Surrender is hard, especially when you're not in touch with the inner part of you that most needs to be surrendered.  Cammie and Brian open a 13-Week Journey of self examination and surrender to identify the false self and return to the true with Jesus.

Blake Lives Matter.  Blue Lives Matter.  All Lives Matter.  There's a war of inflammatory language that's stirring tension, and losing the message.  In this week's really white question for a black guy, we ask him what the message is that he feels most needs to be heard, and what he thinks about all the other messages.

A not-so-clearly articulated but heavily-fought-for concern by white parents is whether American history is being retaught in a way that their children will carry shame for our country's racist failures.Is the concern by these white parents founded?  Do black parents, and other parents of color, have a more accurate take on history that deserves its place in classrooms?  Does the Gospel have any place for creating understanding?

 It makes a difference what kind of literature you are reading. You wouldn’t read Romeo & Juliet the same way you read National Graphic, or a Presidential address the same way you hear a love song, or listen to Anne Frank the same way you do with Harry Potter, so don’t read all the books in the Bible the same way. There are a least five major literary genres in Scripture to be aware of.   More than a scholastic study tool to master, Cammie and Brian use this episode to tell stories of how they use Bible genres in their Daily 20 meeting with Jesus.

If white people don't get a clear straight forward answer to our last really white question, "What do you want me to do?" then the next question that spins off of that is something to the effect of, "Are you just Angry at me for being White and Rich?"  Rich white men are branded as the chief problem for minorities of nearly every circle.  Is it true?  Are they the problem? What is the most constructive way for rich white men to listen to and respond to the problem? What is the most constructive way for anyone under-privileged to voice their position to those with privledge?

One of the big starting white questions for black questions is, "What do you want me to do?"  What's the solution?  What's the plan?  What's practical?  Is that question as productive as get-to-the-point white people think it is?Is it even a fair question?

Ed Cook is joining Brian and Cammie on the Shape of a Circle Podcast more often now.  It's not a new series, as much as it is an ongoing topic we'll return to called "Really White Questions for a Black Guy."  We'll get into the overly assumptive and underly "correct" questions that most white people are thinking.  Let's see what Ed has to say about it, and how the Gospel of Jesus in everyday life furthers it. 

Ed Cook joined Cammie and Brian for a Residency in Church Planting over a year ago.  It was a wild mix of city and suburb, black and white, and there's no good reason that it should have worked aside from Jesus and his Gospel being in the middle.  Enjoy the stories and impressions in this episode of how different races came together as one church, to plant another.

After loving, relating, listening, giving, and gospeling?  What do you do if people want more?  How do you feel when it's not having the exact same impact you thought it would?

It's not about canned presentations and quirky transitions.  It's knowing God's story, your story, and wanting to talk about it.

Gospel is good news even if people don't believe it.  Brian and Cammie challenge you to see what good you can do for anyone anytime this Summer.

Everyday Gospel happens in everyday relationships, so let's talk about the kind of spaces and conversations that best roll out the carpet for that.

Summer brings people out and relationships together.  May it's God who's brought those relationships into your life for a reason; a gospel reason.  Brian and Cammie kick off a new series of episodes on growing a gospel-centric Summer for you and your everyday relationships.

We usually learn and lesson our way through Scripture.  Retreat allows us to hear the voice of God fresh for today in our reading.

If you're anything like us, there's a long list of questions and prayers for God, that deserve more focused time.  Retreat, is your time, to give it that time.  Another quick tutorial from Brian and Cammie will get you a sense of how to unpack your biggest prayer in quiet ways on retreat.

What do you do on retreat?  You get quiet.  You listen.A very quick tutorial on today's episodes will help you get and stay completely quiet with God, without feeling like you're doing nothing.