Claim OwnershipThe Leftover Pieces; Suicide Loss Conversations
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You have found a podcast about surviving life after a suicide loss, which is nothing short of devastating, leaving you not knowing how to begin picking up the leftover pieces of your shattered heart. The host, Melissa Bottorff-Arey, who lost her 21-year-old son Alex to suicide on August 7, 2016, speaks to this from her own experiences. You will hear her have honest, hard conversations with other loss survivors, healers, and mental health experts on the podcast. She also produces shorter, solo episodes where she shares her own thoughts & experiences in this journey (thus far). She explores relevant topics and asks the hard questions. Nothing is 'off limit' as she delves into all areas of this grief, such as trauma, hope, healing, self-care, legacy & stigma. Melissa believes we learn to live alongside our grief, not get over it. We can make a difference only through authentic, meaningful connections and mindful choices. For a supporter or educator, these conversations hold nuggets of awareness and shine a spotlight on suicide and grief honestly and unapologetically. As a suicide loss griever, one can find the comfort of a community and hope for a little brighter tomorrow. Melissa wants to help others, like herself, go from surviving to finding a life with meaning, maybe even happiness, amid their own leftover pieces.
[Please NOTE: This podcast is for only relational, informational, and entertainment purposes. It candidly and openly discusses sensitive and sometimes activating topics. There will be no in-depth or graphic descriptions of the method, but merely the possible mention of suicide, murder, rape, and the like. Be guided and care for yourself accordingly. Also, Melissa is not a doctor or licensed therapist, and nothing on this podcast should be taken in place of, or as, medical/mental health advice or recommendations.]
133 Episodes
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1Today, I go "Down the Rabbit Hole" to talk about the cycle of SHAME & STIGMA & SUICIDE. I give my thoughts on how the & why the cycle exists and what I have done (and am doing) to try to break it and teach others to do so as well. We have to reduce the amount of pain and loneliness that exists (silently) in so many people that we love so that we may destigmatize mental health and remove the strict boundaries our culture has created for what is "normal". We must foster love a...
This is my "START HERE" episode if you are new or need to know where this podcast came to be, who I am and exactly what my plan for the show is. I am so sorry that has caused you to find me, but so very glad that you have found us. WELCOME!!You can find me, the online support groups I lead, the books I have written & all ways to connect with me at:The Leftover Pieces WEBSITE The Leftover Pieces Instagram Life after suicide loss is nothing short of a wasteland of the leftover p...
My conversation with Bonnie Swade founder of SASS-MoKan, a suicide awareness survivor support group in the Kansas City area is packed full of information on the role of a support group, a support system, in a grievers life. Bonnie lost her 31 year old son Brett to suicide on December 20, 2003. The following year, she and her husband Mickey founded their own group. They do very important work in the KC metro area but are a model and inspiration for groups everywhere. SASS (Suicide ...
In this (first) Mini Solo "Down the Rabbit Hole" (DTRH) Episode I delve into the topic of Fear & Grief. I talk about how they overlap & interact as well as how I have (started) to deal with it in my (new) life alongside suicide loss … & grief!You can find & connect with me at The Leftover Pieces Instagram orThe Leftover Pieces Podcast WebpageLife after suicide loss is nothing short of a wasteland of the leftover pieces of your shattered heart, of your former self. Join Melissa...
This is a conversation is with Parker. We talk about losing his 21 year old brother to suicide at the age of 19 when he was just starting college, just starting his 'adult' life - a life he expected would always include his brother. I talk candidly to Parker who MY youngest child about (my other son) Alex's death by suicide in 2016 and how it has changed him, and also our family. He offers the unique perspective of a sibling and speaks to how his generations views and reacts to su...
In this (second)) Mini Solo "Down the Rabbit Hole" (DTRH) Episode I delve into the topic of "THE HOLIDAYS".... I talk about how they were, and how they are now and how I have (started) to deal with it in my (new) life alongside suicide loss & grief. You can find and connect with me at The Leftover Pieces Instagram orThe Leftover Pieces Podcast WebpageLife after suicide loss is nothing short of a wasteland of the leftover pieces of your shattered heart, of your former self. Join Melissa, a...
In this conversation, I talk to Lindsey Doolittle, a suicide (police sergeant's) widow, a loss survivor, but also an advocate and an activist, an artist and an author. We discuss how her husband's police department shunned and shamed her, where she found hope, and how she is living with her loss while providing meaningful support to others now. There is a LOT to take away from this conversation! In Lindsey's own words... "I choose not to sweep my husband’s suicide under the rug. I’ll never ge...
The mini "Down the Rabbit Hole " Episode touches on the 'shoulds' & (possibly) 'shouldn'ts' of the first year(-ish) while you are in survival mode. I offer my own perspective & my advice based on my life, beliefs & experiences, but that's all it is … the ladies opinion. As with everything you hear on my podcasts, please take that which serves you & leave the rest. I hope you will find something of value & I am so sorry that you need to be here, but so honored you are...
In this wonderful conversation with Shelby Forsythia we discuss her new book "Your Grief, Your Way" which is a 366 day (non-religious) daily devotional that I personally think should be in the hands of every griever. We discuss that while her loss is not in the suicide loss space that some components of grief are universal and that filling our 'grievers toolbox' with tools from a variety of places may be necessary, even desired. Shelby is a grief guide, a podcast host & an author. T...
In this mini "Down the Rabbit Hole " Episode I discuss an often natural feeling in grief - one in which joy eluded me & how I got back to feeling a balance ... & feeling deserving of joy once again. I offer my own perspective & my advice based on my life, beliefs & experiences, but that's all it is … this ladies opinion. As with everything you hear on my podcasts, please take that which serves you & leave the rest. I hope you will find something of value & ...
Today I have a powerful conversation with Jennifer. You will hear her tell her story of the trauma- addiction- mental health-roller coaster that she was on for nearly 27 years before hitting bottom & starting to crawl back up. Jennifer struggled with serious suicidal thoughts at the bottom and she discusses it very candidly & I firmly believe that engaging in these conversations is where hope lives, hope blossoms & ultimately where change grows from. You will hear her discuss...
In this mini "Down the Rabbit Hole " Episode I discuss the many tools that I have placed in my "grief toolkit" and others that I am exploring. This is NOT to be taken as definitive OR construed as medical advice. I offer ONLY my own perspective & thoughts based on my life, beliefs & experiences, but that's all it is … this ladies opinion. And I really only scratch the surface & will talk on this subject more in the future as well as have deeper conversations on s...
Today I want to share my conversation with Susan Ward. Susan lost her son Rader on June 7, 2017 to suicide just one week shy of his 16th birthday on June 13. Rader was a creative, intuitive & intelligent child who thrived in Montessori school. Susan & her husband William first noticed Rader's struggles after Rader entered public school. We talk about how they sought 'help' in every way they could yet, it somehow wasn't enough. We also discuss Susan's "tools" for living with her ...
In this mini "Down the Rabbit Hole " Episode I discuss my thoughts on the New Year & how as a suicide loss griever there is a 'suck' to it for sure, but also promise & hope. This is NOT to be taken as definitive OR construed as medical advice. I offer ONLY my own perspective & thoughts based on my life, beliefs & experiences, but that's all it is … this ladies opinion. I also read an origoanl prose piece I wrote recently comparing my grief to the ocean... thi...
Supporting a person who is grieving, especially grieving a suicide loss, can be quite tricky and is not for the faint of heart. Grieving is hard, hard work but so is supporting the bereaved... especially if you too are also grieving. This episode is a conversation that I had with my husband, G.R. where among other things we discuss how we have weathered this loss, the grief, the stigma & more - together. Here's a great article that I found after our conversation the really reaffirms...
Today I head "Down The Rabbit Hole" to discuss some tangible "tools" that I would recommend taking a look at in the quest to find your own. This is a follow up to a previous episode, one of several to come, where I get more specific on some of the "tools" that have (or still do) serve me well in this suicide loss grief space I live in. Part 2 will be published in a few weeks! As with everything you hear on my podcasts, please take that which serves you & leave the rest. I hope you will fi...
In this episode, I have a serious conversation with a warm, funny & insightful lady! Mary has experienced a lot of loss - both of her parents to suicide, her first child dies at 3 months old & her brother-in-law also ended his life... just to name some of her life traumas. Spread over a lifetime, by her forties it had all taken a serious toll on her & she found herself living inside depression & devastation. She was just "existing". Then one day, she looked outside ... a...
Today, I go "Down the Rabbit Hole" to discuss things I have watched, binged or still want to watch with regards to suicide, loss & grief in general. These are everything from movies to series to documentaries; and can be watched on various platforms. THIS IS NOT A DEFINITIVE LIST of what I have watched NOR all of the subject matter ... just some that I chose to share today. Some of these titles are about suicide loss, but most just about loss and grief and how the characters deal wi...
In today's conversation I talk to Emily Dziedzic of "A Radical Life with Emily". She is a Neurolinguistics Professional, a Master Certified Coach, who works with clients in 1:1 Breakthrough Coaching to transform so that they may get out of the places they are stuck (especially in their grief) to leave behind non-serving emotions and step into their own radical life...whatever that means to them.I have done this work with Emily and can hands down say it was one of the most transfor...
Today, I go "Down the Rabbit Hole" to kind of reminisce, appreciate where I am AND look ahead (just a bit). My plan has always been to grow this podcast organically as it calls to me & to talk about things that matter - to me, but also to you. I can't believe I am 19 episodes in … I truly love bringing this podcast to you … all while wishing I never has a reason to bring it to you!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR SUPPORT! As with everything you hear on my podcasts, please ta...
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