The Nonsense Bazaar

What do you get when you cross sleeping pills with the tail end of the LSD molecule? Ambien! The miracle cure for insomnia taken by millions of Americans every year that definitely doesn't make your entire frontal lobe completely vanish while the rest of you walks around doing weird stuff. Stuff like perhaps taking a drive down the wrong side of the highway, start frying eggs in the middle of the night in a full body cast, and many other activities both hilarious and terrifying that you'll never remember even if you live through them. Ambien is an incredibly strange chemical, not just because of the sensational side effects that get people in a lot of trouble, but also because it truly does seem to be a miracle cure, not for insomnia but for brain damage. Ambien seems to allow neurons that stopped firing because of some type of damage to start turning back on and firing again. It's an incredibly strange chemical. And it's even stranger that this stuff is just being given out as a sleep aid. Keep The Nonsense Bazaar ad-free and away from ever considering slinging research chemicals on behalf of big-pharma by joining our Patreon. You'll get access to bonus episodes and our patron Discord server starting at just $5 a month!   https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

Who among us hasn't had apocalyptic visions with a head full of mushrooms? Terrence sure did. This week we're looking at one of the pillars of the legendary psychedelic evangelist's cosmology: Timewave Zero. After Terrence McKenna and his brother Dennis had their noggins rocked by psilocybe cubensis mushrooms in Colombia, Terrence returned from the jungle with "some funny ideas," ideas around a self-similar fractal waveform, calculated through doing fancy wizard math on the I-Ching, the ancient Chinese divination system. According to McKenna the resulting waveform could be overlayed on top of human history and showed a steady, relentless march towards a point of infinite novelty, infinite newness, the eschaton. And this eschaton, according to Mckanna, was set to arrive "on time and under budget" on...December 21, 2012. Spoiler alert: it didn't. But that doesn't make the ideas within Timewave Zero any less relevant, worth talking about, or poetically true. And hey, maybe the apocalypse did happen in 2012 and this is all just our hallucinatory death dream. You really never know.  Increase the density of novelty in our lives by joining our Patreon. You'll get access to bonus episodes, our patron Discord server, and you'll keep The Nonsense Bazaar ad-free. All for just $5 a month! https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

Who among us didn't have at least a touch of the mad scientist fantasy as a kid, right? Most of us, probably. And who among us failed to ever have anything come of it? Most of us, probably. Not David Hahn. David Hahn had himself a notion to build a fast breeder nuclear reactor in his mother's potting shed. And by golly, he did. By cobbling together stolen fire alarms, camping lanterns, and parts financed by selling stolen hubcaps, along with a whole lot of good old-fashioned bullshitting, David Hahn managed to build a small, functional, fast breeder nuclear reactor before he was out of high school. Neighbors said sometimes they'd even see a flashing green glow coming from the old potting shed. Part celebration of mad genius, part tragedy and cautionary tale, the story of the so-called "radioactive boy scout" is a tale of complementarity: it can be all those things, depending on how you look at it.  As soon as we get well and truly paid, we too will build a superweapon. If you want to speed up that ticking clock, throw us some Patreon bones. You'll get access to bonus episodes and our patron-exclusive Discord server for just $5 / month! https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

Admit it, there aren't nearly enough creatures in your life. Weird creatures, cute creatures, mean creatures, there's a whole wide world of creatures out there. And today we're talking about three of them. And with a subtitle like "Water Monsters," you might be thinking we're talking mythical beasts, Nessie's or Champ's or the Kraken. Nope. We're talking real live creatures, but these dudes are most certainly monsters. In this episode, we talk about three animals each with attributes that most certainly qualify them as monsters (especially considering the etymological root of "monster" that Willow digs up), the electric eel, the Greenland shark, and the mimic octopus. Why those three? Because they're sweet as hell, that's why. Good creatures, the lot of 'em.    Join our Patreon and help us build our own menagerie. Buy us an octopus and keep us ad-free. You'll get access to bonus episodes and our Patron Discord server all for just $5 a month.   https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar 

Sometime during the 20th century, hot dogs became forever linked with an American pastime—Competitive eating—and with the most American holiday, the Fourth of July. One could argue that the business of “major league eating” is everything wrong with consumer capitalism. Because it is. However, today we’ll be taking time to celebrate the absurdity of it all by discovering how Nathan’s Fourth of July hot dog contest began and why it persists. Keep The Nonsense Bazaar ad-free and away from debasement on a Coney Island boardwalk by joining our Patreon! You'll get access to our bonus series The Corkboard Bizarre and our Patron Discord server for just $5 a month.    https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

These days you can't shake a stick without running into some version of Gnostic Christianity. Why is that?  Gnosticism is absolutely wild and psychedelic, that plays a part. But did counterculture collectively decide one day that Gnosticism was pretty groovy? Well, apart from fragments of texts, writings about Gnosticism from the Catholic church's perspective (heresy!), and underground currents of mystic knowledge, mainstream culture didn't really know anything about what the Gnostics believed until the discovery of the Nag Hammadi Codices, a jar of 13 papyrus scrolls containing 52 books from Gnosticism, Hermeticism, and other mystic traditions. The collection was discovered in Egypt, 1946 by a pair of probable graverobbers, and wouldn't be fully translated and published until the 1970s. This week we're going to look at some core texts and definitely get some stuff wrong as we explore Gnosticism and the Nag Hammadi Codices.  Help us get a JSTOR subscription and get less stuff wrong by joining our Patreon, where you'll get access to bonus episodes and our patron Discord server, all for just 5 shmucks a month.    https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

Sequoyah had to deal with some rough stuff this week so in lieu of chaining him to his keyboard and squeezing an episode out of him like an old citrus, we're unlocking an episode of our bonus series where we dive into the weird, disturbing, and hilarious world of internet tulpamancy. What's a tulpa? Well a tulpa (aka "tupper," apparently) is a thoughtform entity created by the power of belief that gains external agency and sentience. It's a concept from esoteric Tibetan Buddhism by way of Theosophy. But we're not talking about that side of it. We're talking about kids on 4chan learning how to break their brains in the pursuit of fun and profit. It's usually neither, in the end.   

Who among us can honestly say we've never been tempted to fake our own deaths? You know, get away from it all, start over as fresh as a newborn babe. Today we'll be looking at individuals who were pronounced dead only to miraculously come back or, in the case of Kaycee Nicole Swenson, who never existed in the first place. From England's 'Canoe Man' to the ridiculously dressed Violet Charlesworth to Lil Tay, you'll learn why faking a death is not a very smart thing to do. Pay us so we don't have to commit fraud and you'll also get access to our bonus series The Corkboard Bizarreas well as access to our patron Discord server all for just $5 a month! https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar 

We had a weird day. So this week we're talking about some of the things we've been thinking about recently: nature, defiant optimism, Catholic UFO propaganda, how Willow thought Sequoyah went missing but he was actually just napping, and much more. The state of the union is strong... and ridiculous.  Support The Nonsense Bazaar on Patreon and get access to our bonus series The Corkboard Bizarre and our patron Discord server starting at just $5 a month! https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

This week It’s a touch of the ol’ divine madness in Middle America as we take a look at the highly entertaining and very American art form of revival preaching. From the big top on the frontier to Aimee McPherson, the sexiest preacher who’s ever lived, to Oral Roberts’ saying God was going to kill him if he didn’t get eight million dollars, the tradition of the revival is a type of performance art in a league of its own. It also fills a pretty interesting role in culture. We also learn a whole lot about the very, very American form of Christian mysticism: Pentecostalism, AKA the flavor of Christianity closest to being bombed out of your mind on designer drugs at a warehouse rave. That’s just a true statement. Jesus wants you to give us money too. So join our Patreon and for just $5 a month you’ll get our bonus series The Corkboard Bizarre and access to our patron Discord server. You won’t get healed. You won’t be better off. But we will. And isn’t that what counts? https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

Finding yourself with one foot in reality and the other in dreamland is frightening, especially if you were alive in the 1940s when the solution was to remove all your memories by either drilling a hole in your head or hooking your brain up to the medical equivalent of a car battery. Today’s episode takes us back to that time to explore a book of case studies titled Oneirophrenia and how the author, a physician named Ladislas Meduna, sought treatment for these patients. Know what keeps us engaged in the waking world? Cold hard cash. It also keeps The Nonsense Bazaar ad-free. Join our Patreon for just $5 a month and get access to our bonus series The Corkboard Bizarre and our patron Discord server. https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

You know how they say you shouldn't stare at the sun because you'll go blind? Well, what if that's just what they want you to think? What if the secrets to immortality, an enlarged pineal gland, not needing to eat food, and not needing to wear a shirt on your youtube videos were all unlocked by simply...staring at the damn sun? Welcome to the "ancient" practice of sungazing. Where you stare down the sun until you receive magic powers. Is it an ancient practice? Will you go blind? Is it as stupid as it sounds? And didn't the sun used to be a different color? All these questions and more we will attempt to answer as we explore the world of sungazing.  Keep the Nonsense Bazaar ad-free and away from temptation in all its forms when you sign up for our Patreon. Starting at just $5 a month you'll get access to our bonus series The Corkboard Bizarre, as well as access to our patron Discord server.  https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

Tiny Tim was once one of the most famous men in America. Everything about him was a spectacle. From his trembling falsetto to his odd mannerisms, it's easy to see how he became America's laughingstock. Most people know him as an entertainer but what about as a husband? While tabloids took shots at Tiny, he was taking shots of his own--at the teenage wife he married on The Tonight Show. She wouldn't be his only wife, however, as he'd go on to marry twice more! Tune in to learn all about the man who tiptoed through the tulips and what kind of lover he was. Tiny Tim got paid a little bit for making a fool of himself, why not us? Support The Nonsense Bazaar on Patreon and keep us ad-free and away from ill-advised cover albums. You'll get access to our private Discord server and our subscriber series The Corkboard Bizarre. This week we're talking DMT hyperspace and that time Ebay straight-up psyop'd a middle-aged couple who ran a slightly critical e-commerce blog. All this for just $5 a month.  https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

This week we're telling a story that is very much not our normal fare here at the bazaar: a ghost story, a true-crime murder case, and a courtroom drama. But it also happens to be exactly what we're about. The story of the Greenbrier ghost is often told in the context of "that time an encounter with a spirit was used as evidence in a trial." But that doesn't really do the story justice. After 22-year-old Zona Heaster was found dead under mysterious circumstances, her mother Mary Jane Heaster claimed to have an encounter with Zona's ghost who told her exactly what happened. This story directly led to the arrest, conviction, and death of Zona's husband: Erasmus Stribbling Trout Shue, whose character was indeed commensurate with his name.  Support The Nonsense Bazaar on Patreon and get access to our bonus show The Corkboard Bizarre, as well as our patron-exclusive Discord server. It keeps us ad-free and will eventually buy us some weird, weird gadgets.  https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

We’re traveling to the past to explore the careers of two game show greats: Ralph “Nobody knows who I am anymore” Edwards and Chuck “They made a movie about me” Barris. Between the two of them, they’re responsible for some of the most famous game shows of the 20th century including Truth or Consequences and The Newlywed Game. We’ll learn how their creations altered the media landscape of the 20th century and discuss the possibility of game show hosts secretly having double lives as assassins. We also learn about a Victorian party game called "Forfeits" that we all need to put a solid effort into helping make a comeback. It's fantastic.  Keep The Nonsense Bazaar ad-free and continuing to embarrass ourselves in front of The Public by joining our Patreon, where you'll get access to our bonus series The Corkboard Bizarre (this week we're talking about Tulpas!) and you'll get access to our Patron discord server. All for the low, low price of $5 a month.  

Did you know that all of history is nothing but a bald faced lie? That the entire generally accepted arc of history has been fabricated to keep you, dear listener, from realizing your God-given birthright to fancy architecture, free energy and flying turtles? That there used to be a globe-spanning supercivilization with magic sound technology, strong jaws, and craftsmanship and artistry that we can't even come close to approximating in this fallen age of ours? And did you know that the evidence of this great, wonderful, and "fun, fun, fun loving" civilization is quite literally all around us? And unlike the Atlanteans and Lemurians, this lost globe spanning supercivilization with free energy technology was destroyed not thousands of years ago...but in 1850. Friends, welcome to the dumbest show on Earth. Welcome to Tartaria.  Support The Nonsense Bazaar, keep us ad free and far away from Tartaria by joining our Patreon! For only $5 a month, you'll get access to bonus content, our private discord server, and a deep, lasting sense of satisfaction, abundance, and grace.    https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

This week we’re taking a look at the curious history of one Charles Entertainment Cheese, a robot who claims to be “America’s favorite rat” and built a cardboard-flavored pizza empire which heralded the cybernetic colonization of our childhoods and traumatized generations with animatronic animals dug straight out of the uncanny valley.  We look at the history of Charles Cheese and the various personas he’s inhabited, from rude cigar smoking gangster rat, to rockstar orphan mouse,  the rivalry between Chuck E. Cheese and Showbiz Pizza, the incredibly odd persistent fandom and the ill-advised Chuck E. Cheese live action sci-fi film. We also look at the history of animatronics, from their inception to their role in keeping asses in pizza parlor seats, and how pizza and animatronics collided in 1970’s California and gave birth to the eldritch terror that is Chuck E. Cheese.  Pay us and we won’t send the rats after you. What’s more you’ll get access to bonus episodes and our patron Discord server starting at just $5 a month.  https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

We're headed back to one of our favorite centuries to talk about one of the most famous UFO cases in history. Well, at least on the History Channel. The 1561 "celestial phenomenon over Nuremberg, Germany" entered modern consciousness by way of that spooky Swiss psychologist Carl Jung who wrote about this odd woodcut broadsheet describing a day in April 1561 when the sky filled with all sorts of strange, unidentified objects. Balls and rods and shafts of many colors (primarily "blood"), great big black triangles, swarming the skies and seemingly doing battle in what was, at the time, thought to be a revelation and warning from God signaling the end times. Of course, now we're past all that silly superstition now, we know the truth...it's aliens. Or...do we?  And what is it with revolutions in information technology always signaling apocalyptic mindsets and madness?  Support The Nonsense Bazaar on Patreon and keep us ad free and away from having to do propaganda for the Lutherans! You'll get access to our bonus show The Corkboard Bizarre, as well as access to our private Discord server. Starting at just $5 a month! https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

On today’s episode we’re taking a look at some of the rather silly psychic experiments conducted by the folks over at the Center for Inquiry, a non-profit organization dedicated to stopping the spread of nonsense and promoting reason and skepticism. We’ll learn about the founder Paul Kurtz, secular humanism, ol' James Randi, and their history of legal battles against the most famous spoon bender in history, Uri Geller. They claim to be skeptics but are they actually haters? Or are we? Listen and find out! Fund our own psychic experiments counter propaganda efforts by joining our Patreon, where you'll get access to our bonus show The Corkboard Bizarre and our Discord where we've been messing around with some pretty cool remote viewing experiments. https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar

This week we're taking a look at one of the oldest and most influential epic poems in the world. Bhagavad Gita is the centerpiece of the much, much longer Sanskrit epic poem Mahabharata and has had a huge influence on culture and spirituality the world over. It's also just wicked cool. Taking the form of a dialogue between the god Krishna and the heroic prince Arjuna right before a massive battle is about to pop off, the Gita has a lot of stuff to say about the right ways to live but also has some of the wildest and most powerful passages you'll hear. So we're going through some selections from the Bhagavd Gita and  talking about what it has to say, as well as how it says it.  Support The Nonsense Bazaar on Patreon as an act of worship and with no thought for the fruit of such an action.  There are fruits though. We have a bonus series, as well as a private Discord. And you'll get access to that for just $5 a month! https://patreon.com/thenonsensebazaar