Inspiration from the Couch

Today’s episode is all about fostering financial literacy in our teens and young adults. We start with some of the main financial related concerns we hear from kids during and after college, and we work backwards, highlighting specific tools and skills we can teach our kids before they leave home. We explore methods of payment, tipping, budgeting, and allowance/income. We also talk about natural opportunities to grow these skills, as well as opportunities for financially oriented natural consequences (e.g., how to respond when your teen loses her laptop stylus for the 3rd time in 3 months!). Lastly, we highlight how financial literacy can be complicated: it’s hard to talk openly and directly about finances, and money tends to stir up all kinds of emotions (which makes it even more uncomfortable). 

We sometimes forget that one of the most effective things we can do as parents is to simply get out of our kids' way. In today’s episode we talk about the importance of allowing our kids to face natural consequences. We touch on issues that can make it difficult for us as parents to take a step back, and we review specific strategies to help us “get out of the way.” We talk about specific life skills that are easier for our kids to develop without our interference and when it can be helpful to offer support. 

In today’s episode, we focus on disappointment, a feeling most of us don’t name or talk about enough. We explore what makes disappointment a harder emotion to acknowledge, highlighting the tendency to quickly detour to anger, judgment, shame, or embarrassment. We discuss our own experiences with disappointment. We talk about how disappointment often presents, including the thoughts, feelings, and body sensations that tend to accompany it. We notice that there’s power in being able to name our disappointment – the trick is in letting disappointment coexist with other, often contradictory, emotions. We explore the relationship between disappointment and our expectations (there’s a strong relationship between these two!), and we talk more specifically about how disappointment shows up in parenting. Lastly we discuss both unhelpful (maladaptive) and helpful (more effective) ways to cope with disappointment. 

It’s our 100th episode! We mark the occasion by talking about milestones and taking a walk down memory lane. We discuss the different lessons we’ve learned along the way and relive some of our favorite moments on the podcast. We talk about some of the struggles and disappointments we’ve faced along the way too. One of our favorite parts of doing the podcast is getting to hear from our listeners and we’d love to hear from you! Drop us a line at connect@badassrebellion.comAnd please don’t forget to rate our podcast on itunes!Check out some of our favorite episodes:Episode 3 Playhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-3-play/Episode 5 Trance of Scarcity Book Clubhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-5-the-trance-of-scarcity/Episode 7 Do It Afraidhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-7-do-it-afraid/Episode 13 Compassionhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-13-compassion/Episode 31 Intentional Holiday Seasonhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-31-intentional-holiday-season/Episode 34 Joyhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-34-joy/Episode 38 Comforthttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-38-comfort/Episode 40 Healthy Relationships, Part 1https://badassrebellion.com/episode-40-healthy-relationships-part-1/Episode 41 Healthy Relationships, Part 2https://badassrebellion.com/ep-41-healthy-relationships-part-2/Episode 46 Swimsuit Seasonhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-46-swimsuit-season/Episode 55 Dialecticshttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-55-dialectics/Episode 84 Not Enoughnesshttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-84-not-enoughness/Episode 86 You and Themhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-86-you-and-them/Episode 87 Being Human with Taylor White Moffitthttps://badassrebellion.com/ep-87-being-human-with-taylor-white-moffitt/Episode 90 Unicorn Space with Eve Rodskyhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-90-unicorn-space-with-eve-rodsky/Episode 93 Delights of Decemberhttps://badassrebellion.com/episode-93-delights-of-december/

Today, Jamie, Lucy, and Avery discuss the often misunderstood emotion, envy. In short, envy can occur when someone has something or is doing something that you want for yourself! It often involves some sort of social comparison, usually with people who are similar to us in some way. We talk about the difference between envy and jealousy and why envy often feels “worse.” We share our own experiences with envy, a universal emotion, and what happens when we ignore it.. We also explore the upsides of envy and why it’s important to label envy when it crops up.Resources:https://www.eliseloehnen.com/onourbestbehaviorhttps://www.instagram.com/backwards_hat_dancer/

Love is on our mind as we’re preparing for Valentine’s Day, and today we’re talking about self-love. While we may not be super-fans of the terminology (something about the phrase kind of gives us the ick), but we do actually do love the concept. In this episode, we define “self-love” as loving ourselves unconditionally and taking care of ourselves the way we would someone we love. We touch on the beautiful book The Body is Not an Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor and talk about the quote by Glennon Doyle:  “I have met myself and I am going to care for her fiercely.”. We end with an exercise to help us hold and treat ourselves with love. 

Today’s episode was listener inspired! In this podcast, we talk about what it’s like when the trajectory of our lives is out of sync with what we imagined or expected. We see this during transitions and turning points (whether they are expected or unexpected). We discuss some of the major developmental tasks that we undergo throughout our lives and what it’s like to feel not quite in step with our peers. We also talk about how stories, expectations, having a scarcity mindset, and engaging in social comparison can make us feel even more out of sorts. Lastly, we offer tips and tricks along the way to help navigate all of this change!

It’s the New Year, and resolutions are a hot topic! The concept of “self-discipline” has a tendency to sneak into our conversations about goals and resolutions.  So in today's episode, we take a deep dive into self-discipline: what it is, our (unpleasant) emotional reaction, how it can be helpful, and where it can lead us astray. We also offer alternative approaches to the strategy of “have more self-discipline” when we’re trying to make changes in our lives. 

One of our favorite analogies when it comes to stressful situations is temperature. Conflict can heat things up and everyone can help keep the environment cool and comfortable. In this episode, we talk about what can cause us to come in “hot” to the holiday season and we discuss strategies that can help us keep ourselves cool.

For many of us, the holidays can feel like a whirlwind! When we’re busy with the hustle and bustle, it can be hard to stay centered and tuned in. In today’s episode, we explore what, specifically, about the holidays pulsl us off center and leads us to disconnect from ourselves. In addition, we share some principles and practices to facilitate a more grounded and connected holiday season. 

Today’s episode is all about delight!  We explore how to be more present to delight, how to choose and feel more delight, and how delight can bring us together. We share some of our favorite, specific delights of the holiday season and what can interfere with being delighted. We also invite our listeners to join our December delights challenge (join our email list for more info)!Links:https://www.rossgay.net/the-book-of-delightshttps://www.rossgay.net/the-book-of-more-delightshttps://www.amazon.com/Power-Fun-Feel-Alive-Again/dp/0593241401

Dr. Ellen Albertson is a psychologist, registered dietician, board certified health and wellness coach, reiki master, and mindful self-compassion teacher. She’s an author and has over 30 years of experience in the healing field. In today’s episode, Ellen  joins us for a conversation about mental health and how to “rock your midlife.” She shares several tips on how to change your mindset, empower yourself, improve your relationships, and find joy from her latest book, Rock Your Midlife: 7 Steps to Transform Yourself and Make Your Next Chapter Your Best Chapter.  Where to find Ellen:https://themidlifewhisperer.com/https://rockyourmidlife.podbean.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_midlife_whisperer/https://www.youtube.com/@themidlifewhisperer

Today we talk about 7 ways of thinking – 7 cognitive traps – that increase our suffering and increase the likelihood we’ll abandon ourselves. They are: StoriesExpectationsRulesShoulds/OughtsJudgments / negative self-talkComparisonPerfectionismWe define each of these, exploring how they show up in our lives. We talk about how to shed these ways of thinking when they no longer serve us. We also discuss what makes these thoughts so sticky, ingrained, and hard to get rid of. 

“Life is a series of storms. As we get older, they tend to be more frequent. Taking time to have “fun” is how we weather them. The storms will keep coming so we must learn to dance in the rain.”  Find Your Unicorn Space by Eve RodskyEve Rodsky is known for her game-changing book and social movement, Fair Play.  Fair Play is a groundbreaking system that uses organizational management strategies to more fairly divide unpaid labor in the home. In today’s episode, Eve joins us for a conversation about gender equality, mental health, creativity, and her most recent book, Find Your Unicorn Space.  Eve explains that a successful organization has boundaries, systems, and communication, but her research indicates that boundaries become barriers for women when they don’t believe they have permission to be unavailable from their roles, when guilt and shame ruin their experiences, and when boundaries are met with push back. Eve’s work focuses on helping women reclaim permission to be unavailable and ask for what they need, burn guilt and shame, and hold space for boundary breaches. We love Eve’s definition of mental health: having the appropriate emotion at the appropriate time and the ability and strength to weather it. Eve’s newest book, Find Your Unicorn Space, focuses on weathering the storms of life with curiosity and developing consistent interest in our own lives (rather than singular focus on the roles we fill) as an antidote to burnout.  Where to find Eve: https://www.everodsky.com/https://www.everodsky.com/fair-playhttps://www.fairplaylife.com/unicorn-spacehttps://www.instagram.com/everodsky

In today’s episode, we continue talking about self-abandonment, briefly reviewing the 8 types of self-abandonment (i.e., people-pleasing, not speaking truth, not trusting yourself, over-working/uber-productivity, the quest for self-improvement, checking boxes/collecting gold stars or external validation, numbing out, and getting stuck in your head or ruminating). We talk about how the various types of self-abandonment overlap with one another and share personal examples of which ones we default to in our own lives. We also share several examples of how easily and unconsciously self-abandonment appears in our lives and those of our clients, in big and small ways. Lastly, we offer several ways to interrupt self-abandonment including slowing down, tuning in and making space, letting our entire experience belong, shedding unhelpful expectations, comparisons, rules, judgments, and stories, and being self-compassionate.

In today’s episode, we talk about self-abandonment, all the ways in which we “go outside of ourselves” or lose touch with ourselves in order to determine how to think, feel, or behave. We discuss the 8 types of self-abandonment including people-pleasing, not speaking truth, not trusting yourself, over-working/uber-productivity, the quest for self-improvement, checking boxes/collecting gold stars (external validation), numbing out, and getting stuck in your head (ruminating). We share our own struggles with self-abandonment and provide lots of examples to help you identify where you fall in the self-abandonment spectrum. Stay tuned for part 2 in which we discuss how to interrupt the self-abandonment process. 

“Rarely is there ever a hack. It’s me learning to relate to the thing differently that creates more peace and ease.” -TaylorTaylor White Moffitt is one of our most favorite teachers and mentors. She’s a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and yoga instructor who lives in Boulder, Colorado, and she’s incredibly gifted at helping humans live with more peace, ease, and joy. During our conversation we explore her three cornerstones for transformation: mindfulness, movement, and mental health. We talk about the power of embodiment and experiential practices. We also speak more specifically about midlife, including some of the challenges and gifts (e.g., clarity of what matters most; shedding layers so we can feel ourselves more and so we can live a more connected and authentic life). Taylor’s offerings: Humanity First – year long embodied leadership trainingThe Art + Practice of Self-compassion – 4-week course offered 2x/year (in Oct and Jan)Transformational retreatsWeekly yogaIndividual psychotherapyTo learn more, visit Taylor’s website: https://www.humanityshared.com/

Today we talk about the ongoing work of truly seeing our kids as individual humans apart and independent of us. We talk about the separation and individuation that typically happens in adolescence AND the process of tending to the parts of ourselves that are separate from our identities as parents. In this episode, we talk about the different ways that we attempt to nurture our kids’ identities apart from us and, at the same time, develop our own identities apart from our kids.  Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badassrebellion/https://www.instagram.com/inspirationfromthecouch/

Join Avery, Jamie, & Lucy as they discuss their experiences with creativity in midlife. We share our self-perceptions about our creative abilities (or lack thereof), what gets in the way of creativity, and why creativity is an important part of life. We also talk about the “dark side” of creativity, the relationship between creativity and mental illness, and several strategies to bolster our creative energy in midlife. 

We believe that “not enoughness” plays a fundamental role in both our suffering and our humanity. In this episode, we take a deep dive into not enoughness, exploring how it shows up in people’s lives, the impact it has, and its ripple effects. We share our own experiences with not enoughness, and we give the inside scoop about how we navigate not enoughness, both in our clinical work and in our personal lives. We highlight factors that tend to make not enoughness louder, as well as ways to settle/quiet this part of ourselves.