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Lord Johnlander

Lord Johnlander

Author: Lord Johnlander

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The most chaotic Outlander podcast you'll find! Join JeSuisPrest and MistressPandora on a hilarious adventure through the Outlander universe, as we make our way though a rewatch of the entire series from a Lord John-centric lens. Shenanigans, irreverent humor, wild bullshit, baseless headcanons, the odd legitimate fact, and maybe some actual commentary on the show will abound. If you love Outlander but hate being serious, this is the podcast for you. Spoilers are all over the place and occur without warning. Listener discretion is advised. Like, so strongly.

Many thanks to the talented FaerieChild for generously performing our theme music, "Hens March O'er the Midden" (Traditional).
42 Episodes
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In this week’s episode, “Rec(ommendation)-lander” Pan and Beth cover 708, “Turning Point.” We kick off the Lord Johnlander season 3 finale with a detailed list of alternate show recommendations from Beth to get you through Droughtlander. Pan is predictably unhelpful in that regard, but continues to multiship like a depraved lunatic. Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented FaerieChild. This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
3.06 Talk Nerdy to Me

3.06 Talk Nerdy to Me

2023-08-0243:39

In this week’s episode, “Talk Nerdy to Me,” Pan and Beth cover 707, “A Practical Guide for Time Travelers.” We break down the major turning point in William’s character arc, Beth nerds out about history, and Pan has to take a few moments to process this week’s sexiest scene. Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented FaerieChild. This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
3.05 Manifest It

3.05 Manifest It

2023-07-2648:34

This episode includes sensitive topics that some listeners may find triggering. Listener discretion is advised. A variety of support resources are available in the US by calling 988, or visiting SAMHSA.gov from most anywhere. In this week’s episode, “Manifest It” Pan and Beth cover 705, “Singapore” and 706 “Where the Waters Meet.” We discuss the finer points of swamp-ass as it pertains to the weather patterns on the eastern seaboard of the United States. Beth shares a cool anecdote and swoons over William, and to no one’s surprise, Pan is salty.. The fic recs this week are Prodigal Son by JeSuisPrest -and- Even in Silence by Holly_Mack  Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented FaerieChild. This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
In this week’s episode, “Lord Ellesmerelander,” Pan and Beth cover 704, “A Most Uncomfortable Woman.” This is the (Outlander) episode Beth has been waiting for. And if you’re like Pan and you’re already confused by the wobbly timeline, this is the (Lord Johnlander) episode you’ve been waiting for too. Here’s that EPA article about different kinds of wetlands in the US. And here’s the wiki page for the Great Dismal Swamp. Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented FaerieChild. This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
3.03 Big Bangs

3.03 Big Bangs

2023-07-0539:48

In this week’s episode, “Big Bangs” Pan and Beth cover 703, “Death, Be Not Proud.” It’s a lousy bingo week, and we’re mostly trying to figure out what the heck is going on with this plot. Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
Warning: This episode contains discussion of sexual violence that some listeners may find distressing. Listener discretion is advised. Survivors of sexual violence in the US can contact RAINN at 1-800-656-4673 for support or visit the website to access a variety of resources from anywhere, or chat confidentially with a trained volunteer. In this week’s episode, “I Wish I Knew How to Quit You” Pan and Beth cover 702, “The Happiest Place on Earth.” Beth rethinks her position on last week’s opening scene in light of this one; Pan really wants you to write Jamie/John omegaverse fic; and we discuss the latest trends in aluminum headwear. Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented FaerieChild. This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
SPOILER WARNING FOR SEASON 7! In this week’s episode, “Two Crones with Microphones,” Pan and Beth cover 701, “A Life Well Lost.” Lord John didn’t even have screen time this week, but this is Lord Johnlander, so you can’t tell that by listening to us. Pan is back to stirring the pot and Beth tries some deep breathing exercises to deal with the horror. Play bingo with us! The fic rec this week is “The Art of of Not Grieving Alone” by iihappydaysii & MistressPandora Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
In this week’s episode, “And They Were Roommates,” Pan and Beth celebrate the end of season 2 with all the nerding and shenanigans you could want. Gay monarchs? Check. Calling out historians for being homophobes? Check. A very serious discussion into the philosophical and aesthetic principles of standing cocks? You betcha. Pre-emptive correction: Beth mistakenly said that Louis XV was the grandson of Louis XIV. In fact, he was his great-grandson. Louis XIV, known as the Sun King, reigned for 72 years and 110 days, and outlived his son and two grandsons, leaving his 5 year old great grandson, Louis, Duke of Burgundy, to take the throne at five years old. Also listen to find out what season 3 is going to be like! Beth mentions a carcan necklace. Pan went googling and found this: A carcan (or carcanet) is a jeweled collar or necklace. Carcanets were typically quite elaborate and formal, worn closely fitted to the neck. (source).  Find us on Twitter, Tumblr, or Wordpress to see an example image. Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
2.13 Dragonfly in Pretzel

2.13 Dragonfly in Pretzel

2023-02-2401:17:50

This episode includes sensitive topics that some listeners may find triggering. Listener discretion is advised. A variety of support resources are available in the US by calling 988, or visiting SAMHSA.gov from most anywhere. In this week’s episode, “Dragonfly in Pretzel,” Pan and Beth cover 213, “Dragonfly in Amber.” Beth tries to teach Pan the Latin word for “killing your uncle” (it goes about as well as you expect); we discuss why all of Jamie’s children have daddy issues; and Pan prepares to defend Roger’s honor to the death. The fic rec this week is “It Was Always You” by JeSuisPrest and “The Silver of Moonlight” by JRC10 Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
This episode includes sensitive topics that some listeners may find triggering. Listener discretion is advised. A variety of support resources are available in the US by calling 988, or visiting SAMHSA.gov from most anywhere. In this week’s episode, “Prince Charlie’s Milky Thigh” Ness, Pan and Beth cover 2.12, “The Hail Mary.” We beat up on Claire’s sorry excuse for an apology and then peel back the layers on the villains we love to hate, because priorities. Fair warning: we use more than one sports analogy this episode. No, we don’t know why either. The fic rec this week is This Ain't a Love Song by MistressPandora Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr).
Warning: This episode contains discussion of sexual violence that some listeners may find distressing. Listener discretion is advised. Survivors of sexual violence in the US can contact RAINN at 1-800-656-4673 for support or visit the website to access a variety of resources from anywhere, or chat confidentially with a trained volunteer. In this week’s episode, “Confirmation (Bias) Is Mine” Pan and Beth cover 211, “Vengeance is Mine.” Beth uncovers the secret to successfully invading England, Pan picks up Dougal fangirling duties, and we debate the relative merit of self-sacrifice as Clamie’s go-to defensive strategy. Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
2.10 Pissed in Pans

2.10 Pissed in Pans

2023-02-0301:13:38

In this week’s episode, “Pissed in Pans” Pan and Beth talk with Ness about episode 210, “Prestonpans.” We have a riveting discussion about the fine line between war chief and unhinged madman; interrogate the inherent eroticism of peeing in jars; and (completely unrelated to the previous statement) pour one out for our man Angus. The fic rec this week is May He Rest in Pieces by geekinthepink The bonus (Supernatural, not Outlander!) fic that Pan recommended is All In a Night’s Work by Unforth. Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
2.09 Lord Johnlander

2.09 Lord Johnlander

2023-01-2701:38:55

In this week’s episode, “Lord Johnlander” Ash joins Pan and Beth to cover 209, “Jes Suis Prest.” This is the one we’ve REALLY been waiting for! Lord John may only be on screen for about five minutes, but you better believe we spend a solid hour talking about him. And Beth has some really cool history facts too. The fic rec this week is What It Is to Love Her, by iihappydaysii (Ash) and MistressPandora Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
2.08 Laughing Our Heads Off

2.08 Laughing Our Heads Off

2023-01-2001:34:33

In this week’s episode, “Laughing Our Heads Off,” Pan and Beth cover 208, “The Fox’s Lair.” We imagine what planning a Fraser/Grey wedding would be like, geek out about the real Lord Lovat, and lament the ONE SCENE from the book we all wanted to see for this episode and were cheated. Here’s that wiki article Pan rambled about. No fic rec this week, but we’d love to promote your faves! Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
Warning: This episode contains discussion of sexual violence that some listeners may find distressing. Listener discretion is advised. Survivors of sexual violence in the US can contact RAINN at 1-800-656-4673 for support or visit the website to access a variety of resources from anywhere, or chat confidentially with a trained volunteer. Additional mental health resources are available in the US by calling 988, or visiting SAMHSA.gov from most anywhere. In this week’s episode, “The One with All the Bad Things” Pan and Beth cover 207, “Faith.” It’s an understandably salty, yet unusually educational episode, and we even uncover the real reason John drinks beer for breakfast in between ranting. The fic rec this week is The Best by Far is You by flyinghome_againstthewind Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
2.06 An Unexpected Ranting

2.06 An Unexpected Ranting

2022-11-1101:14:30

Warning: This episode contains discussion of sexual violence that some listeners may find distressing. Listener discretion is advised. Survivors of sexual violence in the US can contact RAINN at 1-800-656-4673 for support or visit the website to access a variety of resources from anywhere, or chat confidentially with a trained volunteer. In this week’s episode, “An Unexpected Ranting” Pan and Beth cover 206, “Best Laid Schemes.” We started off already salty and bring up some fandom-related current events, then try to figure out how much time has actually passed in Paris so far. But hey! At least we figured out why these episodes feel so difficult to get through. The fic recs this week are Come back to me by Holly_Mack; and Fire Closest Kept by JRC10 Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
2.05 Unlikely Agreement

2.05 Unlikely Agreement

2022-11-0401:24:29

In this week’s episode, “Unlikely Agreement” Ness joins Pan and Beth to complain about 205, “Untimely Resurrection.” Ness made the mistake of binging three Paris episodes at once, and Beth and Pan agree that Claire is just The Worst this episode. The fic rec this week is Le Suppliante by kittyperpetua Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
2.04 Amateur Hour

2.04 Amateur Hour

2022-10-2801:18:32

Warning: This episode contains discussion of sexual violence that some listeners may find distressing. Listener discretion is advised. Survivors of sexual violence in the US can contact RAINN at 1-800-656-4673 for support or visit the website to access a variety of resources from anywhere, or chat confidentially with a trained volunteer. In this week’s episode, “Amateur Hour” Pan and Beth cover 204, “La Dame Blanche.” We also chat season 7 cast and predictions, take a look at Jamie’s coming out monologue, and FINALLY get to talk about a dinner party we actually like. The fic rec this week is Sins of the Flesh by preciouslittleingenue Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
Warning: This episode contains discussion of sexual violence that some listeners may find distressing. Listener discretion is advised. Survivors of sexual violence in the US can contact RAINN at 1-800-656-4673 for support or visit the website to access a variety of resources from anywhere, or chat confidentially with a trained volunteer. In this week’s episode, “Even the Characters Are Bored,” Pan and Beth cover 203, “Useful Occupations and Deceptions.” Pan struggles to pronounce anything French (sorry), Beth records from a phone booth, and we do our level best to keep these bored characters entertaining. The fic rec this week is A Token of Appreciation by LeviSqueaks. Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
In this week’s episode, Pan, Beth, Ness cover episode 202, “Not in Scotland Anymore” Join us as Ness gushes about her favorite character, Pan discusses her historical sex toy research, and Beth finds a way to talk about how much she hates “The Search” again (seriously Beth, let it go). Warning: This episode contains discussion of sexual violence that some listeners may find distressing. Listener discretion is advised. Survivors of sexual violence in the US can contact RAINN at 1-800-656-4673 for support or visit the website to access a variety of resources from anywhere, or chat confidentially with a trained volunteer. The fic rec this week, chosen by our guest host, is Trespass Sweetly Urg'd - MistressPandora Other recommended reading: Letter from Alexander Hamilton to Lieutenant Colonel John Laurens, April 1779 (Some more excerpts and commentary can be found here) Theme music is "Hens March to the Midden," (Traditional) performed by the talented @faeriesfanficblog (tumblr). This podcast is NSFW. Listener discretion is advised.
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