SurvivingToThriving with Meghan

Is the abuse of pets and destruction of property considered domestic violence? I would argue that it is. In this episode I discuss the characteristics of abuse that include using kids, pets, and property to control or manipulate a situation, emotions, or another person. For a full list of references, please visit my blog: Moments with Meghanhttps://meghantschida2021.wixsite.com/my-sitePlease remember- You're not crazy, you're not alone, you deserve healthy love, and you're safe here.&nb...

Spiritual abuse is a complicated topic because everyone's religious beliefs are different, everyone typically thinks that their beliefs are the correct ones, and many, many abuse survivors have had religion used against them at some point, either by their abuser or as secondary abuse (sometimes referred to as double abuse) by their church or families. Often, the victim ends up leaving the church altogether due to this abuse. In their book Escaping the Maze of Spiritual Abuse, Dr. L...

Do you know someone who's so difficult to disagree with that it's just a waste of time? Do you find yourself agreeing just so that you don't have to argue, even if you know you're in the right? Or, do they have a reputation of 'always being right' to a point where it's just easier to agree? This is not ok. This is not normal. In an intimate relationship, this is abuse. Intellectual Abuse can be defined as an overall disrespect for another's intellectual interests, talent, way of t...

Social Abuse is easy to see in public when one partner is berating or humiliating the other in front of their friends, co-workers or family. But what about at home? Behind closed doors? What does it look like to weaponize social relationships? Is spending time with your friends and/or family more of a hassle than it's worth? That was my experience. Some markers of social abuse include the following: --Monitors communication (phone, email, text) (Can...

After a relapse that included complete stalling and avoidance due to perfectionism, I am back to share the markers of Emotional Abuse. Remember, abuse is not one red flag or one harmful event. It is a pattern over time that aims to control and coerce. If you're like me, maybe you didn't even know. Nothing made sense until I was ready to learn but then once I did, I just couldn't unsee it. Check out this article on the Wilderness to Wild website where Coach Sarah McDoug...

Psychological abuse. It's a beast. It's confusing. It's a mind fuck. Here are some indicators and what they sound like: -does things, denies it later (GASLIGHTING) ("What do you mean? I didn't do that. You're remembering it wrong.") -terrorizes, then acts like nothing happened (Throws a big fit about this or that, throws things, intimidates, threatens, and then 10 ...

What does physical abuse look like when you have no bruises to show as proof? I've really had to grow my thought patterns around the topic of physical abuse. First I denied it. Then I excused it. Then I recognized it. Now I'm processing it. This is most commonly what my dialogue used to sound like: 1. But he never hit me. 2. It could be worse. 3. Other women are actually getting beat. I'm not, so it can't be that bad right?Listen to find out what physical abuse looks like wh...

In this episode I share what verbal abuse is, what that looked like for me, and how different things are now compared to what I experienced. One of these times I’ll get the timing right so it doesn’t cut off. Still learning here. Here’s the power and control wheel and red flags charts that I refer to in this episode. If you or a loved one are experiencing abuse, or even questioning if what you are experiencing is normal, I encourage you to check out these resources. You Might Be In An Abusive...

I don’t even know how to process a healthy holiday. I just hosted a Thanksgiving without ANY of the residual feelings revolving around trauma or the abuse tactics of holidays past. I’m not sure how to process that. Maybe next year I’ll have better insight. Those first few holidays were reeeeely hard. It gets better, Friends. Thanks for listening.

A question I often get asked is “Didn’t you see any red flags?” My short answer is a simple no. Listen in for the long answer. The one that makes sense. Resources:Books: No Visible Bruises by Rachel Louise SnyderTalking to Strangers by Malcom GladwellArticles by Sarah McDougal: What Does Domestic Violence Actually Look Like? You Might Be In An Abusive Relationship If...*YouTube Playlist:Systems of AbuseComprehensive Resource List:Advocate+Survivor Resource List | WILD's Fave Everyth...

November 10, 2022 marks 5 years since the girls and I escaped our abuser. We are free. Independence Days come with a cost. My body keeps the score. It’s a process for sure. Stay tuned for more hopefully.