Claim OwnershipBroken to Beloved Podcast
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© 2025 Broken to Beloved
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Over 58 million adults in the US have experienced spiritual abuse and religious trauma. Maybe you’re one of them.
The Broken to Beloved Podcast is for anyone who’s been affected by spiritual abuse, religious trauma, or church hurt and is looking for practical resources to move toward healing and wholeness.
Brian Lee is a pastor, coach, and speaker who survived it in 3 different environments and now works to advocate for others who have been wounded by the church and her leaders, and to provide practical tools for awareness and safeguarding against future abuse.
46 Episodes
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When your true face has been hidden for so long, what is it like to finally reveal it? In this episode, we dive into connection, community, relationships, and what happens when it all falls apart. How do you save face in the presence of such incredible loss? We explore memory and story work, and how it helps us to unveil present realities by examining our history. Join us for a more introspective trip into Aimee's path as a writer, mother, daughter, wife, and a woman caught in the crosshairs ...
CW: marriage and sex (not explicit) If you grew up in the evangelical Christianity of the 80s and 90s like me, we likely hear or read much of the same marriage advice. What if it was bad advice? Most of the popular marriage books are written by those with no relevant education or professional credentials and include no research, data, or peer-reviewed evidence for their claims. Sheila Gregoire and her team are committed to work that is healthy, evidence-based, and biblical, and her latest boo...
How can the Church transform from a place of harm to a sanctuary of healing and truth? How do we learn to recognize the wolves among the sheep when it's hard to tell the difference? How can anyone hold on to faith and find hope after witnessing so much trauma? From recognizing a real-life parable of an observing how a body that does not follow its head is very sick, to systems that preserve themselves instead of obeying Christ, Dr. Langberg addresses these questions and much more. We also get...
How have harmful religious teachings about gender reinforced sexism and silenced women's voices in Christian communities? Dr. Andrew Bauman discusses his extensive research on the impact of sexism and abuse on women in churches, challenging misinterpretations of biblical texts that have been used to justify inequality. Bauman shares insights from his book Safe Church, exploring different forms of sexism, the weaponization of forgiveness, and how churches often fail abuse victims through "chea...
What if the church has been telling women the wrong story about their spiritual gifts for centuries? Historian and author Beth Allison Barr and I dive deep into the forgotten narratives of women's ministry, uncovering a rich and powerful history that challenges everything we've been taught. From the abbesses who wielded more authority than most modern pastors to the prophetic voices systematically silenced throughout church history, this episode explores how women have always been central to ...
What if the key to understanding your present lies buried in the stories of your past? In this episode, I talk with Adam Young about his new book Make Sense of Your Story and the transformative power of story work. We explore how desires and disappointments reveal who we are, why self-contempt must be replaced with kindness, and how the path through trauma leads to connection. Adam provides practical guidance on recognizing when someone is safe to share your story with, how to notice what you...
What if pushing harder isn't the answer? Author and trauma therapist Aundi Kolber shares how the surprising path to healing often means doing the opposite of what we've been taught. In our conversation, she shares her own journey of complex trauma and her work with clients, she reveals why disconnecting from our bodies might have once saved us, but now could be keeping us stuck. Learn why the smallest acts of compassion toward ourselves might be more powerful than all our striving, and discov...
In this episode, we dig into how most men never got a proper "sex talk"— just rules about staying pure and anatomical basics, without any guidance on how to handle feelings, desires, and attraction in a healthy way. Jolman shares how men can learn to appreciate beauty (whether it's a sunset or steak) without spiraling into shame or lust, and explains the important difference between arousal and desire. Jolman pushes back against the fear-based messages many people got from purity culture. In...
Ever wondered what happens when a birth doula becomes a biblical scholar? In this episode, I chat with Liz Charlotte Grant, whose fascinating path includes helping deliver babies before diving deep into writing about Genesis. She shares how working with birthing families taught her about letting go of control and making space for people to find their own way—something that completely transformed how she reads and writes about the Bible. Liz talks about seeing the Bible with fresh eyes, especi...
1"Burn it all down." It's a common cry heard from many who have experienced spiritual abuse or find themselves disentailing from the disorienting process of deconstruction. And for those who have been asking the hard questions, wrestling with our beliefs, and navigating complicated relationships, it can be a very real, cathartic, and terrifying thought. But what if burning it down isn't destructive? What if it's actually restorative? What if questioning and wrestling with God is part of our sp...
The 2025 Annual Summit is over! This episode is part 2 of our live Q&A session from Wednesday, January 22 with Amy Fritz and Colby Wilkins, hosted on YouTube Live. We responded to emails sent in with the biggest struggles and questions sent in from over 300 Summit attendees. If you missed the Summit or want to watch any of the sessions, you can still get an All Access Pass. It's still available for $117 through the end of the month. Price goes up to $129 on February 1. Links &...
The 2025 Annual Summit is over! This episode is part of our live Q&A session from Wednesday, January 22 with Amy Fritz and Colby Wilkins, hosted on YouTube Live. We responded to emails sent in with the biggest struggles and questions sent in from over 300 Summit attendees. If you missed the Summit or want to watch any of the sessions, you can still get an All Access Pass. It's still available for $117 through the end of the month. Price goes up to $129 on February 1. Links & R...
Our third Annual Summit starts today! Be sure to register for the Summit to get over 15 sessions packed with practical tools to help name, process, and navigate our experiences of spiritual abuse and religious trauma to move toward healing and wholeness. We have an incredible lineup for you this year, including speakers like Kate Boyd, Ben Cremer, Becky Castle Miller, Christopher Stewart, Colleen Ramser, and lots more. You'll get a link to 3-4 sessions each day, plus access to live Bonus Ses...
Our third Annual Summit is happening next week from January 21–25, 2025, and I can't wait to share it with you. Today, I'm sharing a sneak peek at some of our incredible sessions, including excerpts from my conversations with Adam Young, Jenai Auman, Curt Thompson, MD, and Kayleigh Clark. You'll hear about story work, finding our identity and sense of self, navigating shame, and finding trustworthy and trauma-informed pastors. Be sure to register for the Summit to get over 15 sessions packe...
It's here! Our third Annual Summit is happening January 21–25, 2025, and I can't wait to share it with you. We have an incredible lineup for you this year, including speakers like Curt Thompson, MD, Adam Young, Jenai Auman, Dr. Janyne McConnaughey, and lots more. Over 5 days, you'll get 15+ sessions, plus live Bonus Sessions and Community calls throughout the week. And it's ALL FREE. Click here to find more info and to get your free ticket. ————— Subscribe using your favorite podc...
This is a special episode swap with my friend Steve Carter and his Craft and Character podcast. This episode was originally released in September 2024. In this episode of the Craft & Character podcast, Steve Carter interviews pastor and thought leader Brian Lee about healing from church hurt. Brian has a heart for those who feel like wanderers looking for a safe place to land. He has created an incredible community for anyone who has felt cast aside, betrayed, or hurt from religious inst...
This is a special episode swap with my friend Amy Fritz at the Untangled Faith podcast. This episode was originally released in August 2023. Dr. Karen Swallow Prior joins Amy Fritz on the Untangled Faith podcast to talk about how Stories, Metaphors, and Images have influenced the Evangelical imagination. We should always be trying to be aware of cultural influences and think about how they shape us as humans. - Karen Swallow Prior In this episode we: Discuss the cultural forces that drive ev...
This is a special episode swap with my friends at the "Why God Why" podcast. This episode was originally released in February 2024. In this raw and poignant episode of Why God Why, we delve into the delicate and often painful topic of church harm and the credibility of Christianity. Hosts Amanda D'Angelo and Peter Englert are joined by returning guest Brian Lee, who bravely shares his personal experiences of spiritual abuse and his journey toward healing and advocacy. Brian, a seasoned voic...
This is the last episode in our series on what we value at Broken to Beloved. You can also listen to our previous values, Curiosity over Certainty, Goodness over Wickedness, and People over Position. This week, I'm presenting our final three values as a work in progress: Connection over IsolationWholeness over BrokennessAgency over PrescriptionGiven the choice, I want to include and welcome people into community and connection. We resist the act of othering and excluding. We want to live wit...
Broken to Beloved has been officially operating for just over a year now, and I'm proud of the way we've made a difference for thousands across the world. We've worked with individuals in 49 states and 55 countries. We've heard and held your stories, and offered practical tools to move toward healing and wholeness through our Summit, Cohort, Book Club, Podcast, Conference, and Gathering. In this week's episode, learn about the vision we set last year, how we did, and what we're looking forwar...
We're continuing our series on what we value at Broken to Beloved. You can also listen to our previous values, Curiosity over Certainty and Goodness over Wickedness. This week, I want to talk about how we want to view people. We believe that all of humanity is created in the image of God, and is therefore crated with intention, purpose, and beauty. Beloved. We believe that we are created for community and for each other. If the Body of Christ is meant to fit together perfectly with each perso...
This the second episode in a short series on our values. You can listen to our first shared value, "Curiosity over Certainty" in Episode 20 here. By choosing goodness over wickedness, we affirm the original goodness of every human being and reject a theology that shames, demeans, and devalues. We choose a view of humanity rooted in Genesis 1, not Genesis 2. We reject a “worm theology” that declares our wretchedness and depravity, clinging instead to the truth of the gospel, freedom from cond...
CW/TW: This episode includes references to some child physical abuse and to overtly Christian language. How does our story and theology impact our identity? How do the stories we tell ourselves or are reminded of change the way we see ourselves? How much do they keep us from seeing and embracing our inherent belovedness? In this week’s episode, I speak with Broken to Beloved board member Brett Deal about his own story and journey from brokenness to belovedness. We talk about following the exa...
Can you really ever know when you’ve experienced spiritual abuse by church leaders and organizations? Victims and survivors are so often manipulated and gaslit that they question their own memories and experiences. This is the work Organizational Psychologist Lianna Chong is setting out to complete. Through her work with the Spiritually Abusive Leadership & Climate Survey, she is hoping to have quantifiable and scientifically validated research and hard data. The survey measures areas lik...
Deconstruction has become a polarized term in the past few years. Added to the arsenal of pastors and church leaders, it’s most often used to to dismiss or demean those who have walked away from their church, or to stoke fear into the hearts and spirits of those asking hard questions. What was once a word meant to invite conversation or to indicate an desire to learn more and grow deeper has been weaponized. There is little that it sexy about deconstruction. It’s difficult work, and requires ...
Here’s the first in a short series on our core values. They’re a work in progress, but I want to share them so you have an idea of our guiding principles. This week, I’m starting with our desire to show curiosity over certainty. How many times have we found ourselves in harm’s way for asking a question? How many times have you been met with absolutes, principles, or fundamental truths with no room for comment? Maybe you’ve felt dismissed or demeaned for questioning the way a doctrine seems ou...
Broken to Beloved is officially one year old! This week, I’m taking a few minutes to reflect on what we’ve seen in the last year, and to provide a brief update on the podcast. I can’t begin to tell you how incredibly grateful I am for each of you who listen. We’ve just hit 10,000 downloads, and have listeners in 49 states and 63 countries outside of the US! This podcast wouldn’t exist without you in any meaningful way, and I’ve heard such kind and gracious feedback from many of you. If you’re...
CW: While not explicit, this episode will talk a lot about sex, sexual ethics, and beliefs around sex in and outside of marriage. If you grew up in church in the 90s and through the 2000s, it’s highly likely you were brought up in purity culture. If you’re here, it’s likely you’ve found yourself deconstructing and disentangling your thoughts and beliefs around sex and sexuality ever since. Dr. Camden Morgante has done the work of identifying 5 myths around purity culture, and we get to talk ...
Surprise! We have a little bonus episode to share from the personal experiences of a few cohort alumni. If you’ve experienced spiritual abuse, religious trauma, or church hurt/harm and are looking for a safe place to gather and process, then the THROUGH Cohort is for you. Over 8 weeks, we’ll work together to build trust, find a community of others who share stories like yours, provide safe and compassionate care, and equip you with foundational knowledge and practical tools to seeing and em...
How many of us know someone who talk about holiness and righteousness, then in the same breath can be found cursing out their opposing political party or candidate? For many of us, the disconnect of faith and politics (or is the over-connection?) has caused much tension and conflict. For some, it’s led to questioning our faith, deconstructing why we believe what we do, and leaving our churches. Seeing signs declaring Jesus Saves from those who violently marched into the Capital building on ...
Trauma fundamentally disconnects us. It can disconnect our brains from our bodies. It can sever relationships and entire communities. Those of us familiar with trauma know it can have a real impact on our faith or beliefs. It warps our understanding of others, our sense of safety, and even our own identity. So how do we find connection again? When we are alienated from ourselves, each other, and God, how do we find our way back home? These are the questions that therapist and author Chuc...
In this short series, you’ll get to meet each of our board members. Listen to their stories and backgrounds, and why they chose to serve on the board and support the work at Broken to Beloved. This week, I talk with therapist Kat Wilkins. Get the full show notes here. 📝 Episode Resources and Links Broken to Beloved Book ClubThe Understory on Bookshop | on AmazonEpisode 13 with Laura BarringerWhen Narcissism Comes to Church on Bookshop | on AmazonRedeeming Power on Bookshop | on AmazonThis To...
In this short series, you’ll get to meet each of our board members. Listen to their stories and backgrounds, and why they chose to serve on the board and support the work at Broken to Beloved. This week, I talk with teacher and author Laura Barringer about her “real” work with Kindergartners, her path to becoming a reluctant author, and how that writing has changed her life today. Get the full show notes here. 📝 Episode Resources and Links Episode 7: Forced Forgiveness: Misinterpreting Matth...
If you’ve experienced any amount of spiritual abuse or religious trauma, you know just how confusing, painful and isolating it can be. It can be hard to put into words just how devastating the impact spiritual abuse can have on an individual and family. If you’ve had to leave your faith group for any reason, you know what it feels like to lose your community, friendships, and sometimes employment, insurance, spiritual mentors and maybe even a piece of your own identity. If this sounds like ...
Being a pastor or leader in ministry can feel like an impossible job at times. The job includes not just spiritual direction and discipleship, but management, finances, counseling, and lots more. As if that wasn’t enough, the people in your care often feel an individual entitlement to your time and attention, and rarely understand the scope of the work in front of you. Add to that the explosion of awareness around spiritual abuse and the many stories and scandals in recent years, and it...
Most of us are familiar with fight, flight, and freeze. "Fawn" may be a newer one for many of us. I first learned about the fawn response from Aundi’s incredible book, Try Softer. She describes it as “becoming whatever the abuser or potential threat needs to see from you to see that you are not threatening.” I immediately knew it was one of my primary trauma responses, and it shocked me to look back and see just how often I’d done it. And I felt shame for it. Aundi graciously offers a new and...
Have you heard of Attachment Theory? Have you ever found yourself lost in the language and terminology? Have you wondered if your less-than-perfect childhood and history of abuse or trauma means you're stuck in a specific style Geoff and Cyd Holsclaw offer simple, easy to understand language around the concept of Attachment using the visual landscapes of the Pasture, Jungle, Desert, and War Zone. By laying a foundation of joy, Geoff and Cyd explain how our capacity for intimacy and independe...
What do you do when you’ve given your life to a cause and calling, to have only to find yourself walking away? Steve Carter was named as one of two successors to Bill Hybels at Willow Creek Community Church. When the allegations against Hybels broke national news, it all changed. Ultimately, Steve sided with the women who told their stories and resigned his position in protest. In this week’s conversation, Steve shares about that decision, and how he made choices to pursue integrity, and to a...
TW/CW: references to sexual assault Have you ever had Matthew 18 used against you? Far too often, the forgiveness passage in Matthew 18:15–17 is weaponized against those who experience hurt and harm. Victims are forced to face their abusers, and there is no real reconciliation. The abuser walks away “forgiven” and restored, and the abused walks away humiliated and put in their place. Yes, forgiveness is important. And, forgiveness cannot be forced. It must be a freely made choice on our part...
Episode 5: Finding Liberation and Reclaiming Agency Through a New Story with Cait West "By giving voice to the cognitive dissonance required to be a woman under the patriarchy, you robbed it of its power." — Barbie What does it take to break free from a life controlled by religious patriarchy? Cait shares her journey of awakening to the abuse and control she experienced growing up, and the long and courageous process of reclaiming her agency and voice. Throughout the conversation, Cait discu...
CW/TW: depression, suicidal ideation According to chaplain J.S. Park, people are ready for the conversation around grief and loss. Since you're here, I'm going to assume you're one of them. I feel like I’ve been swimming in the waters of grief, loss, and lament for years now, and this conversation was a breath of fresh air after feeling like I was drowning in denial and dismissal. We talk about what it’s like swimming in those deep waters for extended periods of time, the effect it can hav...
Have you ever felt pushed to the margins of a community? Made to feel like you don’t quite belong? Whether it’s for your politics, sexual identity, faith (or lack of it), or for naming bad behavior, we are made to feel “othered” for a wide variety of reasons. In this week’s episode, artist and author Jenai Auman talks about her experience of being othered, and how she chose to name her experience and find a way forward. We talk about her new book, why and how it was written, and about reclaim...
Episode 2: Embracing Death and the Hope of Wholeness with Lore Wilbert Death is not always the end. In fact, it’s often a beginning and the doorway to a resurrection. Brian and Lore share the importance of embracing both death and life, the connection to nature, finding peace in the present moment, and navigating change and transformation. They also touch on the significance of liminal spaces and the process of shedding old layers to make way for new growth and discuss themes of grief, healin...
Have you ever wondered how to find your way back into healthy relationships after abuse and trauma? By providing clear steps to Name, Frame, and Brave our experiences, Dr. Alison Cook offers practical wisdom to move toward healing and wholeness. We talk about the unique challenges of leaving toxic spaces and environments when they involve family or our livelihood, ways to set boundaries, and to remain curious to our internal world. 🔗 link to full Show Notes and transcript ————— Episode Reso...
The Broken to Beloved Podcast officially launches NEXT WEEK! Join us this season for weekly episodes each Tuesday, starting July 2. Our first guests include Lore Wilbert, JS Park, Jenai Auman, Tim Whitaker, Cait West, and many more. My hope for this podcast is to provide practical resources through compassionate conversations to grow in trauma awareness, set up safeguarding practices to prevent or avoid future trauma, and move toward healing and wholeness. We’ll be kicking things off...
Welcome to the Broken to Beloved Podcast! Hosted by Brian Lee, this is a place for deep and meaningful conversations around spiritual abuse and religious trauma that move you toward healing and wholeness.First, we’ll kick things off with Dr. Alison Cook, therapist, author of Boundaries for Your Soul and I Shouldn’t Feel This Way, and host of “The Best of You” podcast. You’ll get to hear from amazing guests like Lore Wilbert, JS Park, Jenai Auman, Tim Whitaker, Laura Barringer, Chuck DeGr...
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