Paging Dr. NerdLove

Let's be honest: dating can be a trial. For a lot of men, dating isn't something you enjoy, it's something you endure. From trying to meet women, to getting a number, to actually getting women out on a date... it's more like pulling teeth than meeting a potential partner. Today, I want to give you all some advice I wish I had gotten back when I first started dating. Because, if you’re checking out these episodes, then the odds are good that, frankly, you think dating… kinda sucks. And in fairness: you’re not entirely wrong. Dating for men can be kind of awful. But not for the reasons you might think.  In fact, the biggest reason why dating can suck is because of how much harder we men make it for OURSELVES and in the process, make ourselves miserable… even when we think we’re doing everything right.  So let's look at 5 reasons why dating can SUCK for men… and what you can do about it. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: Why men have a conflict mentality when it comes to dating The secret to passing women's "tests" Why so much of what you believe about women, dating and sex is WRONG. How guys get caught in a cycle of dating failure Why you're taking the wrong advice about how to meet women ...and so much more. RELATED LINKS: How To Meet Women, Effortlessly What Men Need To Know About Attraction The Truth About Casual Sex (And Where To Get It)  This Is Why Online Dating Sucks The Fear of Being Invisible  The Love Gap  Faking It: The Lies Women Tell About Sex and the Truths They Reveal What Do Women Want: Adventures in the Science of Female Sexual Desire  Simplified Dating Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher, Spotify and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

The most magnetic, charming and well liked people aren't popular because of their looks, their money, or their bodies. People like them because of they make others feel and the value that they bring into other peoples' lives. These 5 qualities will help you create stronger, more profound connections with others, teach you to be instantly charismatic and become incredibly well liked by everyone around you. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: Why genuine likeability and personal magnetism are rare qualities, even in Hollywood Why sharing the spotlight makes you more popular How triggering one emotion in people makes them like you, instantly Why passion is so attractive in others How authenticity and vulnerability make people want to spend more time with you ...and so much more. RELATED LINKS: These Are The Things You Only Learn When Your Friend Dies Popularity 101 The Value of Authenticity  The "It" Factor  How To Be Charming  Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher, Spotify and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Right now, we are living through the most stressful, even outright traumatic year that most of have ever faced in our lives. Even if you’re in a relatively good place, we’re all getting hit with bad news, more stories of police violence, political corruption, the continuing pandemic, even potential fallout from the election. It can be incredibly hard to have a positive attitude and solid confidence. It can be hard not to look around and say “how am I supposed to have the strength to keep going?"  But you need that emotional strength, powerful confidence and positive attitude more than ever. And the first step is to recognize the things that are stealing your happiness and sabotaging your life and learn how to build the emotional strength it takes to persevere, that appealing confidence and the positive attitude that can help build strong relationships and help you face and overcome the challenges in your life that seem impossible. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: Why one simple word can ruin your self-confidence How we convince ourselves that we're powerless... when we're not The mistake we make that makes us miserable... no matter what we do How we talk ourselves out of success Why your rivals can be your greatest allies ... and so much more.  RELATED LINKS: The 5 Things You Need To Know To Succeed At Dating  What "Forged In Fire" Can Teach Us About Manhood  Unlearning Helplessness  You Are Your Own Worst Enemy  "Your Attitude Controls Your Dating Success"  Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher, Spotify and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Have you struggled with relationships that were bad for you? Maybe you’ve been in a toxic relationship with somebody who was always manipulating you into ways of getting what they wanted, leaving you feeling like a doormat. Maybe you had friends who treated you badly or would pressure you into going along with jokes at your expense or doing things that made you uncomfortable or went against your values. Or perhaps you’ve had family members who would leverage guilt or reciprocity to make you do whatever they want, even if it’s a huge inconvenience to you or emotionally draining or even damaging. Or you were constantly being made to feel as though your interests, desires or wants were unimportant or inconvenient… even if it’s simply “don’t treat me like sh*t.” One of the most important things you can do to ensure you have strong, healthy relationships — with your wife or girlfriend, your friends, your family or even your co-workers — is to have strong boundaries. Today, I'm going to teach you how to build strong boundaries... and how to enforce them. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: What one viral video teaches us about toxic relationships Why abusers and toxic people prey on people with weak boundaries How abusers trick you into lowering your boundaries for them How to push back when people push against your boundaries The most important part of maintaining healthy relationships ...and so much more RELATED LINKS: What Will You Put Up With? Boundaries, Self-Esteem and Dating Enforcing Your Boundaries How Do I Avoid Abusive Relationships? How Do I Get My Family To Respect My Boundaries? Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher, Spotify and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Growing up, I knew I was struggling with things that other people seemed to be able to do without a second thought. I thought I was just lazy, that I needed to be more disciplined and to take things more seriously. But it never worked, and I never understood why. Now, after a lifetime of searching, I finally have the answers.  This week, I want to talk with you about my experiences with having been diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, how it can affect you and your relationships, and my experiences with getting diagnosed and getting treated.  Here's what happened. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: What people get wrong about ADHD Why so many people don't get diagnosed or treated when they need it How having ADHD can affect your confidence and your relationships Why people with ADHD have anxiety and depression How getting treatment has changed my life ...and so much more. RELATED LINKS:  Overcome Your Fear of Rejection - https://www.doctornerdlove.com/overcome-your-fear-of-rejection/ Top 5 Dating Mistakes — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/top-5-dating-mistakes/ This is What Happened After I Tried Meditation for 30 Days — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/this-is-what-happened-after-30-days-of-meditation/ You Must Unlearn What You Have Learned — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/how-to-unlearn-what-you-have-learned/ When It's Time To Ask For Help — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/when-its-time-to-ask-for-help/ ADHD In Adults — https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-in-adults/ Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher, Spotify and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

The #1 reason why so many men struggle with dating is very simple: they don't know what it takes to be successful with women. Attraction isn't a checklist; having all the right "stats" isn't going to magically make you attractive to women. Learning to succeed with women isn't about having the right car or the right body, it's about learning how to become your best, most desirable self.  That's why this week, I'm going to teach you the 5 things YOU need to know in order to succeed with women, become the man you've always wanted to be and build the love life you've always wanted.  SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: Why the men who have everything women want still struggle with dating How to build your dream life... by working backwards from success Why attraction ISN'T about your body, your height, or your income How to escape the trap of your comfort zone Why your own brain tricks you into failing with women ...and so much more. RELATED LINKS: NerdLove Academy Merchandise Book a Private Coaching Session Level Up: Facing Your Dating Fears  How To Take Your Love Life To The Next Level  "I Took The Red Pill. Why Am I Still Not Happy?"  What Women Wish Men Knew About Attraction  The Value of Failure  Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher, Spotify and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Rejection hurts... but the fear of rejection can often hurt even worse. In fact, when we give into the fear of rejection, we often set up a pattern that can affect us throughout our lives. Rejections we've experienced in the past can end up affecting us NOW. When we give into the fear of rejection, we can end up reliving that fear, long after it's happened... feeling the pain as though it's happening to us again, right now. When that happens, it becomes a way that we almost give up our free will; life becomes a series of steps that you take to try to AVOID feeling the discomfort and pain of rejection. It's time to learn how to break the cycle and learn how to stop letting your fear control you. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: What science can teach us about rejection and rejection sensitivity How our brains work against us and keep us in a cycle of fear and avoidance Why rejection hurts, even years later How a fear of rejection can CAUSE the very rejection we're trying to avoid How understanding your body can help you conquer your fear of rejection ...and so much more. RELATED LINKS:   Face Your Dating Fears Overcome Your Fear of Rejection A Man's Guide To Improving Your Emotional IQ This is What Happens After Meditating for 30 Days How To Deal With the Awkward Rejection Sensitivity and the Defensive Motivational System: Insights From the Startle Response to Rejection Cues How ADHD Ignites Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria The Social Skills Survival Pack  Playlist Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Send your dating advice questions to doc@doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books  

What makes one relationship last, while another falls apart? Why do you seem to have found your dream relationship, only to have it turn into a nightmare? Your partner may seem perfect, but it takes more than shallow commonalities to make a relationship work. Just because things are amazing in the beginning doesn't mean that everything is going to work out on it's own. If you've ever wondered whether she's "the one", or you want to know if your relationship has what it takes to go the distance, then you need to answer these questions.  SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: Why people end up in cycles of relationships that SEEM great, but fall apart within six months How "New Relationship Energy" can hide relationship destroying flaws What you REALLY need to have in common to make a relationship last Why the way you fight may be more important than your "love languages" What sexual compatibility REALLY means ... and so much more. RELATED LINKS: Are You Ready For A Girlfriend? — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/are-you-ready-for-a-girlfriend/ Is She Right For You? — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/is-she-right-for-you/ 5 Questions You Should Ask Before You Start Your Next Relationship — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/5-questions-you-should-ask-when-you-start-relationship/ Are You Sexually Compatible? — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/are-you-sexually-compatible/ How To Have The "Defining The Relationship" Talk — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/defining-the-relationship/ Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

It's very easy to feel like you’re forever going to be defined by your worst decisions or your biggest mistakes. But while you can't change your past, you can change your future. By examining one of the best redemption arcs in modern media, we can learn how Prince Zuko overcame trauma and earned his redemption... and find how we can learn to find our own in the process. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: How our response to trauma can shape our lives... and why it can transform us into different people Why a desire for acceptance can turn people into villains How to make a break with the past to build a new future Why it's so hard to make amends Why you have to let go of your desire to be "right" ...and so much more RELATED LINKS: How Do You Find Redemption? — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/find-redemption/ How Toxic Masculinity Hurts Everyone — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/toxic-masculinity/ Recovering From Failure — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/recovering-from-failure/ Why It's So Hard To Be A Good Man — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/why-is-it-so-hard-to-be-a-good-man/ Solving The Incel Phenomenon — https://www.doctornerdlove.com/incel-phenomenon/ Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

One reason why a lot of guys have a hard time meeting women is because they’ve put ALL of their focus on ONLY talking to women, and even then, only women that they’re attracted to. The truth is that the most popular and socially successful men — the ones who do the best with women — tend to be the ones who talk to everyone. Part of the secret to their success is that they know how to connect with people  and build relationships that lead to the results they’re looking for, whether it’s networking, making new friends or meeting and dating new and amazing women. They’re able to start conversations and talk with just about everyone they meet. And today, I'm going to teach you how. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: How you can start a conversation with anyone at any time When you should approach people directly, and when you should use a more indirect approach to start a conversation Why asking a stranger for a favor helps turn them into friends How to get people to come talk to you What the most socially successful people do that makes them instantly magnetic ...and so much more. RELATED LINKS: 5 Signs Women Want You To Approach Them  Never Run Out Of Things To Talk About  How To Get Women To Approach You  5 Secrets to Make People Like You How To Be Charming Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

What does it take to turn your life around? How can you learn to recognize negative patterns in your life that are sabotaging your progress? And what does it take to break those patterns and make positive lasting changes? This week, I've invited my friend and coach Arden Leigh of The Repatterning Project to talk about how to recognize the patterns in your life that are holding you back and what it takes to transform yourself so that you can find stronger, healthier and more positive relationships. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: How we create and reinforce patterns in our lives Why certain patterns and behaviors keep you from meeting your needs What your moods and mindfulness can tell you about the patterns in your life How your social circle can help transform your life Why "Is this working for me?" is the most important question you can ask ...and so much more. —————————————— About Arden Leigh: Arden Leigh is the creator and facilitator of The Re-Patterning Project, a course in understanding the human operating system and repatterning trauma imprints and social conditioning in order to achieve creative freedom. Her certifications are in neuro-linguistic programming and TimeLine Therapy. She is also the creator and frontwoman of indie pop rock project Arden and the Wolves, as well as the creator and host of web series Peace Talks. She is currently at work on her next book. Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/ItsMeArdenLeigh Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/ItsMeArdenLeigh The Repatterning Project — therepatterningproject.com Arden and the Wolves — facebook.com/ardenandthewolves ——————————————

Women often say that they want a nice guy, so why do so many of them think that nice guys are THE WORST? The trouble is that Nice Guy's behavior works against them; what they see as positive and respectful is actually pushing people away. Here's why being a Nice Guy drives women away... and why it can be so hard to STOP being a Nice Guy. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: What "Nice Guy" behavior says about them Why "treating her like a queen" is actually unattractive How Nice Guys ruin their relationships The #1 mistake Nice Guys make that "bad boys" don't What it takes to STOP being a nice guy... and why being a jerk isn't the answer ... and so much more. RELATED LINKS:  The Science of Nice Guys and Assholes  Developing An Abundance Mentality Eliminating Neediness Where Do You Get Your Validation? What's Wrong With Being a Nice Guy? FIND YOUR VALUE AND DEVELOP YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE! GET YOUR FREE WORKSHEET HERE:  http://eepurl.com/dgn7c5 Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books  

Over the course of my career, I’ve dealt with a lot of people who haven’t had much dating experience — from people who’ve only had one or two girlfriends in their lives to literal 40 year old virgins. They all had in one thing common: they had the same fears, beliefs and anxieties regarding dating and women that made them give up. Here's how to break through your dating fears, conquer your anxiety and overcome your self-limiting beliefs. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: How we project our anxieties onto other people How self-limiting beliefs hold us back Why our brains trick us into giving up Why we give up control so easily How to let go of fear ...and so much more. RELATED LINKS:  Unlearning Helplessness Your Attitude Controls Your Dating Success These Self-Limiting Beliefs are Holding You Back Develop An Abundance Mentality The Value of Failure Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

This week, we have a special bonus episode: a live episode where my patrons got to ask me anything — from dating advice to moving to Austin to what shows I've been binging during the lockdown. Plus guest appearances from Mr. Senior Kitty! If you want to take part in the next AMA, be sure to support the podcast by becoming a Dr. NerdLove patron! SIGN UP FOR THE DATING ACCELERATOR PROGRAM Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Sexting and knowing how to flirt over text is a skill that’s invaluable whether you have a friends-with-benefits relationship, a long-distance relationship, or if you and your partner are looking to keep things exciting. In fact, knowing how to start sexting with someone the right way may be one of the most invaluable skills you can develop for keeping the spark in your relationship. But you have to know how to get things started the right way. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: How to lay the groundwork to start sexting with your partner Why the right text can be sexier than any photo What to say to a woman over text to turn her on Why most guys FAIL at sexting What to say to start sharing pictures ... and so much more RELATED LINKS: How to Flirt over Text (Without Being a Creeper) How To Look Good in Photos What Women Want in Men Take The Perfect Tinder Photo F*ck Like A Gentleman SIGN UP FOR THE DATING ACCELERATOR PROGRAM Transcript available at doctornerdlove.com Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

How happy are you with your life right now? If you're like most people, you probably have a list of major changes you’ve wanted to make. You may even have looked at the current pandemic as your chance to work on yourself and get your life where you want it to be. Now tell me, how far HAVE you gotten on that list? The odds are not very far. You probably attacked it like a man possessed… only to find your motivation and desire drained away. Now you’re basically back where you started, just more frustrated than before and wondering why you’re such a failure. Except, you’re not a failure. Honestly, you were always going to end up in this situation. Because here's a secret: this was always going to backfire on you because you — like most people — were going about this the wrong way. That's why,. Let's do this. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: What everyone gets wrong about self-improvement Why your problem isn't a lack of discipline or willpower How you accidently sabotage your own progress Why most self-improvement plans fall apart within weeks, if not days How ritual and routine leads to success ... and so much more. RELATED LINKS: The Dating Accelerator Program Starting From Zero  How To Take Dating to the Next Level  5 Simple Ways to Improve Your Social Skills  Maintaining Positive Changes in Your Life  How To Improve Your Willpower  Transcript available here Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

Last time, we talked about the recent trend of folks reaching out to their exes, why it’s happening so frequently and why it can be comforting to try to rekindle an old relationship. But it's far too easy to fall back to old patterns and old routines with your ex, which means you're going to make the same old mistakes that lead to new pain. Today, I'm going to teach you the RIGHT way to get your ex back. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: Why the most popular ways to get your ex back DON'T WORK What you need to do before you try to reconnect with your ex How to reach out to an ex without feeling forced, fake or manipulative What to say to make your ex want to take you back Why so many relationships fall apart for the second time... and how to avoid it ...and so much more. RELATED LINKS: How To Deal With Your Ex Why You Will Never Get Closure How To Stay Friends After The Break-Up Ask Dr. NerdLove: We Were On A Break The 5 Things You Need To Get Over Your Breakup When You SHOULDN'T Get Back With Your Ex (And When You Should) Transcript available here Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books  

With the stress and the chaos of the COVID-19 pandemic, more and more people are reaching out to their exes for comfort, for connection and something more. But is it ever a good idea to get back with your ex? If you're thinking of trying to get your ex back — or reaching out to them again — then you need to be able to answer these 5 questions first. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS: Why we look to our past relationships when times are hard When an old relationship is better left in the past... and when it's worth trying again Why it's so hard to make a relationship with your ex work a second time How to avoid repeating old mistakes and reliving your old break-up Why your ex might be right for you NOW ... and so much more. RELATED LINKS: How To Deal With Your Ex Why You Will Never Get Closure How To Stay Friends After The Break-Up Ask Dr. NerdLove: We Were On A Break The 5 Things You Need To Get Over Your Breakup Transcript available here Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books  

Self-isolation can be a trial for even the happiest lovers. Couples under quarantine are starting to feel the strain on their relationship. Relationships are rarely tested the way that they’re being tested now, and many people are discovering their relationship isn't as happy or as strong as they they thought. In some parts of the world, divorce rates are starting to skyrocket as soon as quarantine orders have been lifted. Don't let that happen to YOUR relationship. In this free workshop, I'll teach you what it takes to keep your relationship happy, healthy, safe and strong, so that your relationship can survive the COVID-19 crisis. Book a private coaching session with Dr. NerdLove Sign up for The Dating Accelerator Program Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books

The COVID-19 pandemic doesn't mean that your love life has to be put on hold. In fact, relationships are more important than ever. People are still meeting, dating and even falling in love during social distancing. The coronavirus pandemic has forced us to think about dating in new and different ways. In this replay of the live workshop, Dr. NerdLove will talk about how dating has changed, how we can change with it and how the current crisis has the potential to make us more desirable dates, better lovers and incredible partners. SIGN UP FOR THE DATING ACCELERATOR PROGRAM   Don’t forget to subscribe and review us on iTunes , Stitcher and on YouTube. Like the podcast? Become a Dr. NerdLove patron at Patreon.com/DrNerdLove Want more dating advice? Check out my books at www.www.doctornerdlove.com/books