The Elegant Warrior with Heather Hansen

In today's episode, Heather Hansen sits down with her good friend and returning guest, Judge Rosemarie Aquilina, Michigan judge, author, and trailblazer best known for presiding over the Larry Nassar USA Gymnastics case. Together, they dive into Judge Aquilina's newest book, Speak Up: Lessons in Trusting Your Instincts, and unpack what it truly means to embrace your voice, conquer fear, and stand in your self-worth. Drawing from her decades on the bench, her time in the military, and her role as a mentor for women, Rosemarie shares how we can turn fear into fuel, failure into wisdom, and change into growth.     In this episode, you'll learn: The Power of Fear – Why fear isn't something to eliminate but something to learn from. Owning Failure – How accepting your mistakes can transform them into moments of strength. The "Blue Ink" Lesson – How one lawyer turned public embarrassment into a courtroom victory. The Language of Leadership – Why small word choices (like using the instead of a) can change how people perceive your authority. Embracing Change – How preparation, adaptability, and voice help you thrive through uncertainty. Building Self-Worth – Why being your own hero is the foundation of authentic confidence.     In this episode: [00:00] Meet Judge Rosemarie Aquilina, her story from Munich to Michigan's first female JAG Corps member [02:00] Fear, failure, and the courage to show up anyway [06:30] The "blue ink" courtroom story and lessons in embarrassment [09:30] How metaphors and language shape persuasion [11:00] Embracing change, preparation, and control [15:40] Why Judge Aquilina never asks "why" [18:00] The difference between a solution and the solution [22:00] How to be an insider in your own life [26:00] Writing as a tool for self-discovery and healing       Resources & Links: 📘 Speak Up: Lessons in Trusting Your Instincts – Buy the book here 🌐 Follow Judge Rosemarie Aquilina – Website   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In today's episode, Heather sits down with John Lowry, lawyer, negotiation coach, and author of Negotiation Made Simple, to uncover what it really takes to become a confident, effective negotiator. John's experience as a professor at Pepperdine University's renowned Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution, CEO of The Lowry Group, and consultant to major organizations gives him a unique lens into the psychology and strategy behind every great deal. Together, Heather and John explore how mastering negotiation isn't just about tactics; it's about managing yourself, understanding others, and learning to balance ambition with empathy. In this episode, you'll learn: The Inner Negotiation – Why the first and most important negotiation happens inside your own mind and how managing your emotions, fears, and self-talk determines your success. Cooperation vs. Competition – How to know when to lean into collaboration and when to assert your position with strength and clarity. The Power of Patience – Why "you often pay for the time you save" and how slowing down the process helps you make better, more strategic decisions. Axelrod's Four Steps to Effective Negotiation – Start cooperatively, respond in kind, forgive, and be clear. John and Heather unpack how these steps build trust and drive results. The Ambition + Empathy Equation – What Harvard research reveals about top dealmakers and how combining drive with understanding gives you a competitive edge. Real-World Lessons – Insights from John's work with executives, mediators, and organizations on how to use negotiation to build healthier relationships and stronger outcomes. In this episode: [00:00] Meet John Lowry – Lawyer, author, and negotiation expert [02:46] The first negotiation: managing yourself [06:17] When to cooperate and when to compete [10:47] Getting comfortable with uncertainty [14:49] Why patience pays in negotiation [18:00] Recognizing signals vs. words [22:14] Forgiveness and cooperation in business [26:29] Collaboration vs. cooperation explained [31:12] Building trust through clarity [35:20] Ambition and empathy, the twin pillars of great dealmakers Resources & Links: 📘 Book: Negotiation Made Simple by John Lowry 🎙️ Podcast: Negotiation Made Simple Podcast 🌐 The Lowry Group: lowrygroup.net Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In today's episode, Heather sits down with award-winning interior designer Manuella Moreira, founder of Manuella Moreira Interiors, to talk about what it really means to advocate for yourself in business, creativity, and life. From her leap of faith leaving a stable job to launching her own design studio, to building a media presence with features in Forbes, The New York Times, and Architectural Digest, Manuella shares how trusting your intuition and showing up with courage can open the doors you've been waiting for. Together, Heather and Manuella explore how self-advocacy, boundaries, and creativity intersect and how you can design a life that feels as beautiful as it looks. In this episode, you'll learn: How to Know When It's Time to Leap – Why "ready" is a choice, not a feeling. The Art of Advocacy – How to speak up for your business, your worth, and your creative vision without feeling like you're bragging. The Client Experience – Why the best designs aren't about your style but your client's story. Media & Momentum – How Manuella built lasting relationships with top publications and became a trusted design voice. Avoiding Burnout – What moving across the country taught her about balance, intuition, and redefining success. Saying Yes Before You're Ready – How the universe meets you halfway when you take bold action. In this episode: [00:00] Heather's update on podcast consistency and introducing Manuella [03:26] Manuella's journey from firm designer to founder [06:45] The Bali trip that changed everything [10:45] Advocating for yourself as an entrepreneur [16:44] Landing her first Forbes feature and how to stand out with media [22:20] Knowing your audience and serving their needs [24:30] Collaborating with BEHR Paint for the Color of the Year reveal [25:50] Advocating for your boundaries and avoiding burnout [31:30] The power of asking and what to do when you get a "no" [33:36] Manuella's new podcast and why she believes design is for everyone Resources & Links: 🌐 Manuella Moreira Interiors: manuellamoreirainteriors.com 📸 Follow Manuella on Instagram: @manuellamoreirainteriors 🕯️ Explore Manuella's candle collection: https://manuellamoreira.com/shop/ 🎧 Listen to Manuella's podcast on design and intentional living: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/design-unscripted/id1807446750 Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In today's episode, Heather wraps up her three-part series on how to advocate for yourself at work and this one's all about the magic moment: mastering the art of the ask. If you've ever hesitated to ask for what you want because you weren't sure how to do it gracefully, persuasively, or confidently, this episode is for you. Heather breaks down what true charisma really means (it's not about being flashy or loud!) and how you can use empathy, storytelling, and the right tone to inspire others to say yes. With powerful stories, evidence-based research, and step-by-step guidance, Heather shows you how to turn your next "ask" into a collaborative, impactful conversation that gets results. In this episode, you'll learn: What Charisma Really Is – It's not charm or popularity, it's the ability to get people to act. How to "Know Your Jury" – Why understanding your audience's pain points, needs, and goals changes everything about how you ask. The Power of Believing in Your Jury – How your energy and mindset shape the way others respond to you. Storytelling vs. Metaphors – Why the right metaphor can connect faster and hit deeper than a long story. The Role of Evidence – How to collect and create evidence to strengthen your case before you ask. Tone Over Body Language – The science behind why tone of voice carries more weight than posture or facial expressions. The "What Now?" Question – What to ask if your first request doesn't get a yes and how it helps you find your next step. Resources & Links: 📘 Free Guide: Advocate for Yourself at Work – Download Heather's companion workbook to put this three-part series into action. 🌐 The Elegant Warrior – Visit elegantwarrior.com for more resources In this episode: [00:00] Welcome to Part 3: Mastering the Art of the Ask [01:15] What "charisma" actually means [04:45] Knowing your jury and why it matters [06:40] The difference between empathy and perspective [09:10] Believing in your jury before they believe in you [11:23] Why your words matter more than your body language [13:45] Storytelling vs. metaphor: what connects faster [16:10] How to collect and create evidence [18:30] The truth about tone of voice and energy [20:50] What to do when your ask doesn't get a yes [23:00] Putting it all together: the three steps of self-advocacy 💬 Quote of the Episode "Before you worry about them believing in you, try believing in them and see what a difference that makes." Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In this second episode of Heather's three-part series on how to advocate for yourself at work, she dives into one of the most transformative steps: asking for what you want out loud and with delight. Building on the foundation from Part 1 ("Know What You Want"), Heather explores why choice and energy are everything when it comes to advocating effectively. Asking for what you want isn't just about words—it's about how you feel when you ask. From her years as a trial attorney to her experience coaching clients, Heather reveals how shifting your beliefs can transform your results, your confidence, and your career. In this episode, you'll learn: Why Manifesting Isn't Enough – You can journal, visualize, and set intentions—but to get results, you must also advocate out loud to the person who can give you what you want. The Hidden Cost of Hinting – How implying your desires (instead of saying them) leads to resentment, and how to break that pattern. The Energy of Asking – Why your energy speaks louder than words, and how delight, curiosity, and confidence attract what you want. The BEAR Formula – How your Belief, Energy, Action, and Result connect—and how changing your belief changes everything. The Belief Triangle – A powerful framework for building unshakable confidence: believe yourself, believe in yourself, and believe you can help. Real Talk from the Courtroom – Heather's story of how asking out loud (and with delight) changed her career and her results. Resources & Links: 📘 Free Download: Companion Guidebook-How to Advocate for Yourself at Work 📚 Advocate to Win – Heather's book on mastering the art of self-advocacy 📖 The Lion Tracker's Guide to Life by Boyd Varty – as mentioned in this episode 🌐 The Elegant Warrior – Visit elegantwarrior.com for more resources In this episode: [00:00] Welcome back: Step two of self-advocacy [01:47] Why "asking out loud" is a choice—and how to make it [04:08] The difference between manifesting and advocating [06:33] Why implying what you want leads to frustration [08:55] The danger of resentment when you don't ask directly [10:31] How your energy reveals your belief [13:39] The BEAR Formula: belief → energy → action → result [16:02] Choosing beliefs that lead to confidence and delight [17:40] The Belief Triangle: building your foundation of self-trust [18:29] What's next: Step three—Mastering the Art of the Ask 💬 Quote of the Episode "Your energy is your belief made visible." Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In today's episode, Heather kicks off a special three-part series on how to advocate for yourself at work, whether you're seeking a raise, a promotion, or a new opportunity. Advocacy isn't just about asking, it's about asking in a way that makes you likely to get it. This first episode focuses on the foundation of self-advocacy: knowing what you want. Heather shares how clarity, specificity, and the courage to want what you want can completely change the way you approach your goals. Through real client stories and practical tools, she reveals why defining what you want is the key to every other step of advocacy and how small, strategic steps can lead to big wins. In this episode, you'll learn: The Three Steps of Advocacy – Why every successful ask starts with clarity, confidence, and follow-through. The Power of Specificity – How breaking your goal into smaller steps (and knowing who can give you each one) can change your results. Permission to Want What You Want – Why allowing yourself to desire something, even when it feels uncomfortable, is essential for growth. Redefining the Win – How success isn't just about getting the job or promotion, but building belief in yourself and evidence that you can do hard things. A Real-World Story – How one client went from dropping her resume on LinkedIn to securing multiple interviews and rediscovering what she truly wanted. Resources & Links: 📘 Free Download:  Companion Guidebook-How to Advocate for Yourself at Work📚 Advocate to Win – Heather's book on mastering the art of self-advocacy🌐 The Elegant Warrior – Visit elegantwarrior.com for more resources In this episode: [00:00] Welcome to the three-part series on self-advocacy [01:08] Why knowing what you want changes everything [03:30] From big dreams to actionable steps [05:52] A client's story: turning a resume drop into an opportunity [10:31] Learning to want what you want [15:17] Redefining what it means to "win" [17:40] Believing you have your own back [19:58] What's next: Step two, asking for what you want out loud and with delight 💬 Quote of the Episode "Knowing what you want is the foundation of advocating for yourself. When you allow yourself to want what you want, you've already begun to win." Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In today's episode, Heather speaks with Simone Knego, author of The Extraordinary Unordinary You, about what it truly takes to build confidence, embrace your story, and live fully. From adopting three children from South Korea and Ethiopia, to climbing Mount Kilimanjaro, to co-hosting a podcast with her daughter, Simone's life has been a series of extraordinary experiences that shaped her outlook on resilience, patience, and self-worth. Together, they unpack how confidence is not about being perfect, but about choosing to see yourself differently and taking small, brave steps toward growth. In this episode, you'll learn: Why Patience Builds Confidence – How parenting her son Noah taught Simone to redefine patience and see it as a strength. The Power of Choices – Why even small, bold choices can completely change your trajectory. Living Like You Have One Life – Lessons from her daughter Mili on resilience and joy despite difficult beginnings. Climbing Your Own Mountains – Simone's Kilimanjaro climb and how it inspired her to say "yes" to growth outside her comfort zone. Breaking Free from "Just" – Why removing the word just from your vocabulary transforms the way you see your value. Control-Alt-Delete for Confidence – Simone's simple mindset tool for shifting negative self-talk in the moment. Resources & Links: 📖 The Extraordinary Unordinary You: Follow Your Own Path, Discover Your Own Journey – Get Simone's book 🎙️ Her Unshakeable Confidence Podcast – Simone's podcast with her daughter 🌐 Simone Knego's Website – Learn more about her work and upcoming book Real Confidence In this episode: [00:00] Meet Simone Knego, author, speaker, and mother of six [03:45] Why patience is the foundation of confidence [10:37] Choices that shape your story – stepping out of line [12:59] Lessons from Mili: you only get one life [15:19] Climbing Kilimanjaro and finding purpose [20:06] Breaking free from "just" and claiming your value [22:26] Building unshakable confidence with her daughter [24:42] Control-Alt-Delete: a confidence reset tool [27:00] Where to find Simone and her books Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In today's episode, Heather answers a powerful question from her Instagram community: How do I advocate for myself without bragging? This is a challenge so many of us, especially women, face. How do you share your gifts, your expertise, and your accomplishments with confidence and authenticity without feeling arrogant? Heather breaks it down into three core strategies that will help you shift your mindset and your approach so you can advocate with grace, clarity, and impact. In this episode, you'll learn: Talk About the Thing, Not Yourself How externalizing your gifts makes sharing them feel like service, not bragging. Believe in Others as Much as Yourself Why trusting the openness and curiosity of the people you're speaking to shifts your energy and confidence. Own Your Gifts Why fully embracing and sharing your talents is essential to living your purpose and making a difference. The Role of Service in Advocacy How approaching advocacy from a place of contribution removes the stigma of bragging. Practical Tips to Change Your Self-Talk From using "iliism" to adopting a service mindset, Heather shares tools to reframe doubt into empowerment. Resources & Links: 📖 Chatter by Ethan Kross – Learn more about self-talk strategies🎧 [Heather's conversation with Ethan Kross on The Elegant Warrior Podcast] In this episode: [00:00] Listener question: How do I advocate for myself without bragging? [02:00] Talk about your gifts as a "thing" separate from you [07:30] Believe in the people you're speaking to [11:50] Own your unique gifts with confidence [14:20] Advocacy as service vs. bragging [17:30] Final thoughts & invitation to send your questions to Heather Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In today's episode, Heather sits down with Dr. Christie McMullen, educator, author, speaker, and leadership expert, to explore how learning truly takes root. With a 25-year career spanning high school classrooms, adult education, and leadership training, Christie brings a wealth of experience to the conversation. Her book, Learning Can Stick: A Guide to Make Every Learning Experience Safe, Logical, Fun, and Memorable, offers strategies for teaching and leading that apply far beyond the classroom. Together, Heather and Christie dive into why everyone is a teacher, whether you're guiding patients, mentoring employees, or leading a courtroom, and how to make every lesson both memorable and impactful. In this episode, you'll learn: Performance vs. Learning Goals – How setting both helps define success and the steps to get there. "Clear is Kind" – Why clarity is essential in teaching, leading, and everyday communication. The Power of Connection – How learners deepen understanding by engaging with each other. Trusting the Learning Process – Why letting go of control often leads to better outcomes. Making It Personal – How emotion and reflection anchor lessons in memory. Note-Taking vs. Note-Making – Why interacting with your notes makes all the difference. Sprinkle, Splash, Flood, Drip – Christie's framework for ensuring information actually sticks. Resources & Links: 📖 Learning Can Stick: A Guide to Make Every Learning Experience Safe, Logical, Fun, and Memorable Buy the book here🌐 Christie McMullen Learn more about her work and speaking In this episode: [00:00] Meet Dr. Christie McMullen, educator, leader, and author [02:30] Performance vs. learning goals explained [07:00] Why "clear is kind" in leadership and teaching [09:20] Leveraging connection to make learning stick [12:45] Trusting the process and formative feedback [16:30] Making it personal: emotion, reflection, and relevance [22:00] Turning notes into learning tools [27:40] Sprinkle, splash, flood, drip: repetition that works [31:10] Final reflections and key takeaways Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

n today's episode, Heather speaks with Rebecca Heiss, evolutionary biologist, speaker, and author of Springboard: Transform Stress to Work for You. Rebecca shares her groundbreaking perspective on stress, not as something to eliminate, but as a force you can reframe and harness. With her Fearless Stress Formula, she teaches how to stop fighting stress and instead use it as fuel for growth, resilience, and meaning. Rebecca's journey spans science, entrepreneurship, and personal challenge from founding an ice cream company to leading discomfort challenges and building communities. Together, she and Heather unpack the myths about stress and how you can shift your relationship with it to live a more powerful, purposeful life. In this episode, you'll learn: The Fearless Stress Formula: A three-part system to stop fearing stress and start working with it. It's Not a Tiger: How to recognize when your body's "danger" signals are overreacting to everyday life. Transforming Stress into Energy: Why reframing anxiety as excitement can boost your performance. Curiosity Over Fear: How asking questions interrupts stress spirals and shifts perspective. Trajectory and Action: Why small steps into discomfort matter more than avoidance. Post-Traumatic Growth: The surprising science that shows stress and growth can coexist. The Power of Community: How stress can actually deepen connection and why support systems matter. Resources & Links: 📖 Springboard: Transform Stress to Work for You Get the book here🌐 Learn more about Rebecca's work rebeccaheiss.com🏀 Game Changer Basketball WeAreGameChanger.org Episode Highlights: [00:00] Meet Rebecca Heiss – scientist, author, and entrepreneur [04:54] The Fearless Stress Formula: It's Not a Tiger [09:41] Stress as a sign of meaning and purpose [11:12] Transforming stress into excitement and energy [14:53] Why curiosity and fear can't coexist [17:57] The power of trajectory and action [22:03] Learned helplessness vs. agency [26:13] Post-traumatic stress and post-traumatic growth [29:41] Building community with Game Changer Basketball [32:57] Hope and the importance of support systems Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

Heather Hansen takes us back to her two decades as a trial attorney and reveals the surprising ways courtroom wisdom can shape your life and career. From the first day she stepped into court, Heather realized it wasn't just a place of law; it was a classroom of leadership, persuasion, influence, and resilience. In this episode, Heather shares five powerful lessons from the courtroom that apply far beyond the legal world. Whether you're navigating career growth, relationships, or leadership challenges, these insights will help you see "the jury" in your life more clearly and make choices that lead to real wins. If you've ever struggled with setbacks, conflict, or defining success on your own terms, this conversation will inspire you to see every challenge as an opportunity to collect and create evidence of your growth. In this episode, you'll learn: Why everyone has a "jury" in life and how to win them over The importance of truly knowing your jury before trying to persuade them Why confusion, not people, should be treated as the real enemy The tough-love truth: if you're not losing, you're not trying How to redefine what it means to "win" in your life and career Resources & Mentions 📚 The Elegant Warrior by Heather Hansen  🌐 Learn more about Heather's consulting and coaching by setting up a call here.https://calendly.com/beliefbuilders/consult Episode Timestamps [00:00] Heather introduces the idea of lessons from the courtroom [01:00] Lesson 1: Everyone has a jury [03:00] Lesson 2: Know your jury [07:30] Lesson 3: Confusion is the enemy [10:15] Lesson 4: If you're not losing, you're not trying [14:45] Lesson 5: You get to define a win [17:00] How to apply courtroom lessons to everyday life ✨ Quote of the Episode "If you're not losing, you're not trying. Losing is evidence that you're willing to bet on yourself and take risks with pride." – Heather Hansen Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

No one likes the feeling of being misunderstood. It can create frustration, conflict, and even missed opportunities, whether in the courtroom, the boardroom, or at home. In this episode, Heather Hansen shares three powerful steps to move from feeling unseen and unheard to becoming the "queen of your kingdom." Drawing from her decades as a trial attorney, her consulting work, and personal lessons, Heather shows why misunderstanding doesn't have to hold you back. Instead, it can be the very spark that strengthens your clarity, influence, and power. If you've ever felt dismissed, overlooked, or simply not "gotten," this conversation will help you turn confusion into connection.   In this episode, you'll learn: Why your first choice of thought and feeling determines how others receive you How curiosity and compassion create pathways to understanding The importance of truly seeing the other person's perspective before trying to persuade Heather's three-step process: Choose, Understand, Advocate How to master "the art of the ask" by using stories, evidence, and energy Why delight, not resentment, is your greatest advantage when communicating Resources & Mentions: 📚 The Elegant Warrior by Heather Hansen ✉️ Join Heather's weekly newsletter for stories, strategies, and updates 🌐 Learn more about Heather's consulting and coaching at ElegantWarrior.com   Episode Timestamps: [00:01] The universal challenge of being misunderstood [02:00] The "Martian" metaphor for communication gaps [03:18] Lessons from defending doctors in medical malpractice cases [05:45] Step 1: Choose your thoughts and feelings [08:08] Step 2: Understand their perspective before persuading [12:53] Step 3: Advocate with stories, evidence, and energy [15:15] Stepping into your power by mastering communication ✨ Quote of the Episode: "Choose, understand, advocate. When you do, you'll transform being misunderstood into being powerfully understood." – Heather Hansen Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.

Heather Hansen takes on a question from listener Molly, who asked about two challenges many professionals face: How to think big-picture and work toward career advancement without getting bogged down in day-to-day responsibilities. How to stay in the know across a large organization and use that knowledge to broaden personal and team perspectives. Heather combines these into one powerful conversation about choice. With stories from her days as a trial attorney, lessons from her consulting work, and wisdom borrowed from her own mentors, she shows why every career move comes down to the decisions you make — and the evidence you create for yourself and others. If you've ever struggled with balancing responsibilities and growth, this episode will inspire you to be deliberate, intentional, and bold in choosing your future.   In this episode, you'll learn: Why recognizing that you are always choosing is key to career growth How focusing only on daily tasks limits your long-term opportunities The tough-love truth: growth sometimes requires trade-offs in personal time Micro-strategies to stay informed — like using podcasts as a personal curriculum How to transform learning into leadership through "lunch and learns" Why creating evidence of your initiative gets you noticed by decision-makers The difference between collecting evidence and becoming the evidence of what's possible Resources & Mentions: ✉️ Join Heather's Email List to get podcast updates, stories, and exclusive offers not shared anywhere else 📚 The Elegant Warrior by Heather Hansen 🌐 Heather's work with trial and communication consulting Episode Timestamps: [00:00] Heather introduces Molly's question about delegation and staying informed [01:25] The overlap between focusing on tasks and thinking big-picture [03:00] Lessons from Heather's early career as a trial attorney [06:15] Saying "yes" to opportunities that aren't billable but expand your growth [08:40] Choosing reading and podcasts over distractions like Instagram [10:55] Rudy's advice: lead something for the team (like a lunch and learn) [13:15] The power of creating evidence of your leadership and vision [15:35] The truth about making tough choices with delight ✨ Quote of the Episode: "You are always choosing. If you don't recognize your choices, you risk missing the opportunities that could change your career." – Heather Hansen Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In today's episode, Heather speaks with Anna Crowe, founder and CEO of Crowe PR, about the real meaning of authenticity in leadership and life. Anna's journey from auditor at a Big Four accounting firm to leading a bi-coastal PR agency gives her a unique perspective on building trust, showing up genuinely, and leading with transparency. Together, they unpack why authenticity is more than just a buzzword—and how you can cultivate it in your own life. In this episode, you'll learn: The Foundation of Authenticity – Why trust starts with being real with yourself before you can be real with others. The Five Habits of Authenticity – Including the power of consistency, owning your mistakes, and admitting when you don't know something. Contextual Authenticity – How you can show different sides of yourself in different settings without being "fake." Four Principles of Authentic Leadership – From staying flexible to communicating directly, Anna shares how to lead in a way that connects and inspires. Feedback as a Leadership Superpower – Why giving and receiving feedback is one of the most vulnerable—and authentic—things you can do. Real-World Leadership Lessons – Insights from Anna's career spanning corporate giants, global PR work, and building her own agency from the ground up. Resources & Links: 📖 Get Real: The Power of Genuine Leadership, a Transparent Culture, and an Authentic You – Buy the book here 🌐 Crowe PR – Learn more about Anna's agency In this episode: [00:00] Meet Anna Crowe – From Big Four auditor to PR agency founder [03:45] Defining authenticity and why it matters [07:32] The Five Habits of Authenticity [16:59] Anna's corporate and entrepreneurial journey [18:45] Four Principles of Authentic Leadership [27:17] Final thoughts on getting real   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In this fiery and insightful episode, Heather Hansen takes a bold stand against one-size-fits-all communication advice — especially the kind coming from male experts that simply doesn't work for women. With decades of experience in advocacy, law, and coaching, Heather breaks down why advice from well-meaning male voices like Jefferson Fisher and Vin Gang may actually backfire for women in real-life situations, especially when it comes to being interrupted, advocating for yourself, or commanding authority. She offers a powerful alternative: learn how to advocate the way that actually works for you. With stories from her courtroom days, coaching practice, and research-backed insight, Heather shows women how to stop trying to "man up" their voice and instead lean into proven techniques designed for how women are actually perceived — and how we naturally communicate. If you've ever followed advice that left you feeling ignored, labeled as "too much," or just plain ineffective, this episode is your permission slip to do things differently. In this episode, you'll learn: Why "great advice" often fails women — and how to know if it's not for you The difference between communication and advocacy (and why you must master both) What research says about women being interrupted — and why standard advice can make it worse How women are judged differently for the same behaviors as men — and what to do about it Why avoiding conflict OR mimicking male assertiveness both backfire The proven tools that help women advocate effectively, without being labeled abrasive or bossy Why Heather's courtroom experience taught her to prepare men and women differently — and how you can apply that in everyday life Resources Mentioned: 📚 The Elegant Warrior by Heather Hansen📖 The Next Conversation by Jefferson Fisher🎧 Jay Shetty's podcast interview with Vin Gang📊 The recent study on how women CEOs are labeled Bonus Announcement: 🎓 FREE Masterclass: How to Handle Interruptions (and Be Heard) Without Being Dismissed 🗓️ August 13 at 3 PM ET ➡️ Can't join live? Sign up to get the replay. 🎁 But if you can make it live, there's a special surprise just for you! 🔗 [Register here] In this episode: [00:00] Heather sets the tone: Why she's tired of advice that doesn't work for women [01:45] Communication vs. advocacy — how they're different and why it matters [03:10] Why following male experts left Heather confused and frustrated [05:00] The two critical questions to ask before following anyone's advice [05:30] The case of Jefferson Fisher: great communicator, but his advice may not fit [07:50] Why women's voices and presence are systemically dismissed [10:00] Research reveals the biases women face when speaking up [12:30] Why "too much" isn't always powerful — and what actually gets results [14:00] How to know your audience (or "jury") before you speak [15:00] The feminine communication edge — and how to use it strategically [16:30] Heather's courtroom wisdom: train men and women differently for better results [17:15] A call to action: Get the tools to speak effectively and get what you want "You have to speak for your ideas, your potential, and your worth — because they can't speak for themselves." – Heather Hansen Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In this powerful episode, Heather responds to a heartfelt question from listener Natalie, who is navigating life with a chronic illness that others often misunderstand. Natalie asks how to advocate for herself without sounding like she's complaining — a question that resonates with so many living with invisible pain. Through personal stories, insights from neuroscience and psychology, and actionable steps, Heather teaches how to communicate your needs clearly, choose the right audience for your vulnerability, and advocate for yourself with both strength and grace. Whether you're facing chronic illness, emotional pain, or just want to show up better for yourself, this episode will leave you feeling seen, supported, and empowered. In this episode, you'll learn: The First Question to Ask: Before speaking up, Heather shares the key question you must ask yourself: What do I actually want from this person? Why Hinting Doesn't Work: Learn how vague expressions of pain don't lead to help, and how to turn your situation into a clear request. The Energy of the Ask: How asking with delight (or conviction) radically changes how others respond to your needs. When to Stay Silent: Why talking about your pain can sometimes make things worse and how to choose when to share, and when to journal instead. The Power of JournalSpeak: Discover how Heather used Nicole Sachs' "JournalSpeak" method to reduce physical pain and emotional overload during a crisis. Why Misunderstandings Hurt and What To Do About Them: Heather explains when to advocate for deeper understanding and when to let people think what they want. Healing Through Expression: The science behind why venting to people can increase pain, but venting in a journal can actually ease it. How to Prepare Yourself to Advocate  Even When You're Not at Your Best: Practical tools to reclaim energy, reset your mindset, and step into confident advocacy. Resources Mentioned: 📚 All of Ethan Kross' Work✍️ All of Nicole Sachs' Work & JournalSpeak Resources 🎧 Nicole Sachs' Podcast: The Cure for Chronic Pain with Nicole Sachs, LCSW Bonus Announcement: 📅 Heather's FREE Masterclass – How to Handle Interruptions and Being Ignored 🗓️ August 13 at 3 PM ET ➡️ Learn how to respond to interruptions with confidence and charisma 🎁 We will send you a recording if you can't make it live. But there is a special surprise if you make it live!  🔗 Register here In this episode: [00:00] Listener Natalie's question: The struggle of invisible illness and being misunderstood [01:45] Heather's personal story: Migraines, functionality, and feeling "off" [03:50] What do you really want? Sympathy, understanding, or help? [06:00] The golden rule of advocacy: Ask clearly, ask with delight [08:30] When not to share your pain, and why complaining can backfire [10:50] Journaling vs venting: Research-backed ways to process emotions [12:50] The story of Heather's father, her grief, and how she discovered JournalSpeak [14:30] JournalSpeak and emotional pain: The power of writing what you can't say [16:00] Advocating through pain: How journaling clears the way for charisma [17:00] Misunderstood? Why sometimes it's worth correcting, sometimes it's not [18:10] Heather's 3-step framework for self-advocacy while in pain [19:00] Final thoughts: Vulnerability, visibility, and strength in the face of suffering   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In this engaging conversation, Heather Hansen speaks with Dr. John Antonakis, a leading expert on the science of charisma. They explore the definition of charisma, its importance in leadership and influence, and how it can be learned. Dr. Antonakis shares insights from his research, including studies on the impact of charisma on performance and the role of cognitive empathy in effective communication. The discussion also touches on the potential influence of AI on charisma and the importance of genuine human connection in leadership. In this research-packed episode, you'll learn:  Introduction to the Science of Charisma – Heather and Dr. John Antonakis open with a deep dive into what charisma truly is—not charm or confidence, but a learnable skill grounded in peer-reviewed science. Charisma's Measurable Impact on Performance – They explore powerful studies—including one with a robot—showing how charismatic speech alone can increase workplace performance by up to 17%. The Building Blocks of Charisma – John introduces his framework: symbols, values, and emotions, and explains how these components combine to create influence that inspires action, not just applause. The Power of Metaphor and Framing – Heather and John discuss how storytelling, metaphor, contrast, rhetorical questions, and the "rule of three" work together to create speeches that stick. Cognitive vs. Affective Empathy – The duo breaks down why cognitive empathy (understanding how others think) matters more in leadership than feeling what others feel—and why that distinction is critical for decision-making. The Myths About Body Language – John challenges the popular belief that charisma is mostly non-verbal, presenting evidence that words drive behavior far more than gestures or facial expressions. Charisma as an Equalizer – They unpack how charismatic speech can neutralize biases based on attractiveness, race, and gender, offering hope for more equitable influence in politics, business, and beyond. Artificial Intelligence and Charisma – Can AI replicate charisma? Heather and John explore the limitations of using AI to craft influence—and why doing the reps yourself still matters most. Practical Tools for Everyday Leaders – Whether you're a parent, teacher, executive, or coach, you'll walk away with actionable techniques to become more charismatic and persuasive—based on science, not guesswork. Resources & Links: 🔗 Harvard Business Review Article – Learning Charisma 🎥 Dr. Antonakis' TEDx Talk – Let's Face It, Charisma Matters 📰 Newsweek Article – Dog Predicts 2024 Presidential Election Bonus Announcement: 📅 Heather's FREE Masterclass – How to Handle Being Interrupted 🗓️ August 13 at 3 PM ET ➡️ Learn how to respond to interruptions with confidence and charisma 🎁 Attend live to receive a free checklist giveaway 🔗 Register here In this episode: [00:00] Introduction to Dr. John Antonakis [03:45] Understanding Charisma's Impact [16:33] The Mechanics of Charisma [21:10] The Components of Charisma [36:53] The Role of AI in Charisma [45:43] Conclusion and Resources   Connect with Heather: Register for the 8/7 training on How to Manage Interruptions here Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In this episode, Heather answers a heartfelt question from a listener named Z about people-pleasing Heather breaks down the root of resentment that often comes from saying "yes" too often — and receiving "no" in return. Through relatable stories and actionable guidance, she empowers listeners to advocate for themselves with confidence and grace.   In this empowering episode, you'll learn: The Resentment Cycle of People Pleasers - Z's question echoes a common struggle: always saying yes, only to feel hurt when others don't return the favor. Heather explores how this dynamic creates resentment and disconnection — both at home and at work. False Consensus and Miscommunication - Heather explains the false consensus effect — the mistaken belief that others see and value things the same way we do. She emphasizes the importance of communicating needs clearly instead of assuming others "just know." From Silent Hints to Clear Requests Through the story of a high-powered client and her husband, Heather illustrates the danger of hinting instead of asking. Saying "I'd love to go to this concert" is not the same as saying, "Will you come with me?" A Better Follow-Up Question - Heather suggests asking, "What would have to change for you to say yes?" as a non-confrontational way to open conversation, gain insight, and gauge someone's willingness. Understanding the Law of Reciprocity - Referencing Robert Cialdini's "Influence," Heather unpacks the psychological principle of reciprocity — and how gently reminding someone of past support (without guilt-tripping) can increase the chances of a return favor. Power Dynamics and Reciprocity - People in positions of power often feel less pressure to reciprocate. Heather highlights this dynamic and how it explains why some people — especially at work — may not return favors. Saying No as a Spiritual Lesson - In one of the episode's most powerful insights, Heather reframes the struggle as part of your Divine Curriculum. Quoting Marianne Williamson, she suggests that learning to say no is not just practical — it's part of your personal growth and purpose. Recap and Encouragement - Heather closes with a reminder that not everyone sees your effort. Advocate with clarity. Ask with delight. And sometimes, the greatest lesson is how to say no with confidence and self-respect. In this episode for Libsyn:  [00:00] - Listener's question about being a people pleaser and handling requests without reciprocity [00:28] - Personal story about attending a Pearl Jam concert and navigating requests from others [03:18] - The importance of recognizing when others ask for things and the concept of reciprocity [04:43] - The significance of understanding what you need and asking for it effectively [06:48] - The challenge of asking for what you want without feeling guilty or selfish [08:29] - Reflection on working together and helping each other in professional settings [09:23] - Feelings of frustration and defensiveness about asking for help [12:16] - The law of reciprocity and its role in relationships and requests.  [14:43] - Recognizing the importance of asking for what you need and the role of reciprocity [15:00] - The value of understanding and respecting others' boundaries and needs [16:58] - The significance of the last piece of the reciprocity puzzle [17:23] - The divine curriculum and its relation to giving and receiving [18:53] - The importance of saying no and setting boundaries [20:00] - The value of encouraging others to say yes and the importance of mutual support [21:50] - Final thoughts on answering questions and ongoing engagement with listeners.   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In this episode, Heather introduces "Credible Charisma™" as a key to becoming irreplaceable in a world where many feel replaceable due to the rise of AI and other technological advancements. She shares personal experiences and introduces a framework to help listeners cultivate this essential quality. In this insightful episode, you'll learn: The Fear of Being Replaceable: The speaker addresses the widespread anxiety of feeling replaceable, whether due to artificial intelligence, aging, or other life circumstances, and asserts that everyone is inherently irreplaceable. Credible Charisma™ as the Antidote: She introduces "Credible Charisma™" as the learnable combination of qualities that makes someone unforgettable and irreplaceable, contrasting it with the idea that being smarter, faster, or better is sufficient. The Belief Triangle for Credibility: The speaker outlines her "Belief Triangle™" framework for building credibility, emphasizing three crucial aspects: people believing you (keeping promises), believing in you (having the necessary experience and talent), and most importantly, believing you can help them (understanding their pain and problems). Lexi: An Embodiment of Credible Charisma™: Through the story of her former paralegal, Lexi, Heather shares how someone can become irreplaceable by consistently demonstrating credibility (keeping promises, possessing skills, and understanding needs) and charisma (making others feel seen, safe, and special). Debunking Charisma Myths: The speaker challenges common misconceptions about charisma, particularly the idea that it's "fluffy" or primarily non-verbal. She debunks the widely cited 93% non-verbal communication statistic, clarifying its true context. The True Nature of Charisma: Drawing on research from Dr. John Antonakis, the speaker defines true charisma as being based on "what you say and how you say it" (content and delivery), and her personal interpretation that this combination makes people feel seen, safe, and special, with safety being paramount. The Interdependence of Credibility and Charisma: She emphasizes that charisma cannot exist without credibility, stating, "You can't have charisma without credibility. Without credibility, you can't win." Building Credibility Through Stories and Evidence: The speaker introduces her "SEE Technique™" for building credibility, which involves sharing stories that resonate with others and providing evidence (like research studies) that makes people feel safe to believe. The Power of Para-verbal Communication: She highlights the importance of "para-verbal" communication (tone, pace, volume, inflection) over body language and facial expressions, asserting that it's a more significant component of charisma and reflects true belief. Credible Charisma™ as a Foundation for Resilience: The episode concludes with a powerful analogy: credibility is a "huge, solid cliff" that withstands change, and charisma is a "lighthouse resting securely on that cliff," guiding and calling people home to a place where they feel seen, safe, and special. In this episode for Libsyn:  [00:09] -  Introduction to Credible Charisma [01:00] - The Concept of Irreplaceability [02:14] - Personal anecdotes [04:28] - Belief triangle [07:00] - Charisma: Making People Feel Seen, Safe, and Special [08:29] - The impact of Lexi's departure and the inability to replace her, even with artificial intelligence. [09:38] - The Credible Charisma Framework™ [12:41] - Defining True Charisma (with Dr. John Antonakis) [13:48] - The Interplay of Credibility and Charisma [16:32] - Verbal, Para-verbal, and Non-verbal Communication [18:26] - Conclusion and Call to Action Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  

In this episode, Heather introduces a previously recorded conversation with Judge Rosemary Aquilina from December 30, 2019. This re-release serves as an introduction to Judge Aquilina before she and Heather launch their new podcast, "Undeniable," in August. The episode highlights Judge Aquilina's impactful role in the Larry Nassar case and her unique approach to justice, emphasizing listening and healing. In this insightful episode, you'll learn: Introduction to Judge Aquilina: Heather sets the stage for the conversation, explaining why she's replaying this particular episode and introducing Judge Rosemary Aquilina, highlighting her significance in the Larry Nassar case and her upcoming joint podcast with Heather. Early Life and Influences: Judge Aquilina shares her childhood experiences, including her immigration story and feeling unheard, which profoundly shaped her desire to advocate for others and led her to pursue a career in law. The Path to Law and Justice: Judge Aquilina discusses her decision to attend law school, driven by a rebellious spirit and a deep-seated need to give a voice to the unheard, a theme that resonates throughout her career. Breaking Barriers in the Military: Judge Aquilina recounts her experience as the first female JAG officer in Michigan history, illustrating her determination to overcome obstacles and challenge norms. The Power of Listening in the Courtroom: Judge Aquilina emphasizes the importance of listening in her judicial practice, particularly in the Larry Nassar case, where her approach encouraged over 100 women to come forward and share their stories. "What Do You Want Me to Know?": Judge Aquilina explains the origin and impact of her signature question, "What do you want me to know?", revealing how this simple inquiry fosters trust and allows individuals to feel heard and understood. "Leave Your Pain Here": Judge Aquilina discusses the profound effect of her statement to the Nassar victims, "Leave your pain here. Go out and do your magnificent things," and how she views her role as a healer in the courtroom. The Healing Power of the Robe and Gavel: Judge Aquilina describes how she perceives her judicial robe and gavel not just as symbols of authority, but as tools for healing and rehabilitation, aiming to empower individuals to move forward. Continued Connection with Survivors: Judge Aquilina shares that she remains in contact with many of the Nassar survivors, offering ongoing support and demonstrating her continued commitment to their well-being. Personal Resilience and Family Life: Judge Aquilina touches upon her personal life, including having children later in life, and how her family provides stability and balance amidst her demanding career. Defining Elegance and Inspiration: Judge Aquilina shares her personal definition of elegance, emphasizing inner character and dignity, and reveals her theme song and a book that has inspired her throughout her life.   In this episode for Libsyn: [00:00] - Introduction to Judge Aquilina [06:39] - Early Life and Influences [10:24] - The Path to Law and Justice [11:43] - Breaking Barriers in the Military [20:46] - The Power of Listening in the Courtroom [23:29] - "What Do You Want Me to Know?" [25:50] - "Leave Your Pain Here" [26:44] - The Healing Power of the Robe and Gavel [29:54] - Continued Connection with Survivors [32:07] - Personal Resilience and Family Life [33:05] - Defining Elegance and Inspiration Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.