Always Evolving

In this episode, Mike and Liz discuss ways to strengthen family relationships. They provide four tangible ideas that will help to foster a healthy family culture and enhance the bond of family members. They provide insights on the importance of these types of activities, and how to include them into a busy lifestyle. Resources: Family Questions Activity (Worksheet) | Therapist Aid Relationship Gratitude Tips (Worksheet) | Therapist Aid Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Mike and Liz discuss the basics of the communication skill, validation, and provide an understanding of why it is crucial for healthy relationships. Mike and Liz talk about what is validation, why it matters, and how to best provide validation in communication. They also discuss what validation is not and provide helpful tips on how to apply this communication skill right away. Resources: Reflective statements: Reflections: Communication Skill (Worksheet) | Therapist Aid Book: THE ART OF EMOTIONAL VALIDATION: Improve Your Communication Skills and Transform Your Relationships by Validating Emotions and Feelings. By Emily Wright Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Being willing to take ownership and responsibility is part of any healthy relationship. And being accountable for your actions is an empowering reminder that you have lots of control in your relationship. In this episode, Liz and Mike talk about what taking responsibility in your relationships truly looks like. They give tips on how to take ownership of your actions as well as how to avoid misplacing blame. Check out the episode and take your relationships to the next level. Resources: Book: Is It You or Is It Me? Is It You or Is It Me?: Why Couples Play the Blame Game by Scott Wetzler 0060930292 9780060930295 (discoverbooks.com) Worksheet: Couples Negative Cycle – EFT Worksheet (mindfullyhealing.com) Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Relationships can be very tricky when attempting to decipher the fine line between appropriate compromise versus betraying our own wants, needs, and boundaries. Mike and Liz explore six primary components to consider when contemplating what a healthy relationship looks like. Whether you are currently in a relationship, or single and looking to start a new relationship, it is crucial it includes safety, respect, trust... and certainly fun! Resources: Book: Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help YouFind - and Keep - Love / Authors: Levine & Heller Boundaries Worksheet: Boundaries Discussion Questions (therapistaid.com) Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Valentine’s Day can be hard whether you are single or in a relationship. In this podcast Liz and Mike give some tips on how to make the day a great one. They discuss the importance of being intentional about the day and not just expecting it to go well. Liz and Mike talk through some suggestions on how to spend the day, including getting some time outside, indulging in your favorite foods and doing some gratitude journaling. Listen to this episode to ensure that you have a great Valentine’s Day. Resources: How to Survive Valentine’s Day: How to Survive Valentine's Day - A Practical Guide (lifehack.org) Gratitude Journal: The Gratitude Journal: Prompts, PDFs and Worksheets (positivepsychology.com) Recipes: 30+ Best Valentine's Day Dinner Recipes | Food Network Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Effective communication can be really hard! It can be difficult to express ourselves openly and honestly out of fear of being dismissed or misunderstood. In this episode, Mike and Liz discuss five ways to improve your communication skills in order to be more clear with the messages that you are sending, as well as to be more attentive and understanding with the messages that you are receiving. Resources: Book: Couple Skills: Making your Relationship Work / Author: McKay, Fanning, & Paleg "I" Statements: https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/i-statements.pdf Active Listening Worksheet: Active Listening: Communication Skill (therapistaid.com) Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Elizabeth and Michael review 5 basic things that every kid or teen needs to hear from their parents. They talk through the importance of parents being openly complementary of each other in front of others. They also detail how critical it is for parents to be open about what is difficult for them as well as asking for help when it’s needed. Lastly, Elizabeth and Michael review the ways to explain emotions to kids and teens. Resources: Book: 50 Things You Needed To Hear As a Child 50 Things You Needed To Hear As A Child by Jackson, Craig: New, Paperback, $7.05 at Alibris Article: 44 Things Every Child Needs to Hear 44 Things Every Child Needs to Hear | Power of Positivity Article: 10 Things Your Child Needs to Hear From You Every Day 10 Things Your Child Needs to Hear from You Every Day (parentsenlight.com) Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

The holidays can be a wonderful experience for kids. However, with lots of new toys and games, sharing those new things can often be difficult. Michael and Elizabeth discuss the best ways to get siblings to be able to share with one another. They talk through the ways to prepare your children for difficult situations that tend to come up in the home. Michael and Elizabeth also give tips on using praise when sharing goes well. Lastly, the go through how to avoid accusations and assumptions when things don’t go well. Resources: Book: Share and Take Turns Share and Take Turns (Learning to Get Along, Book 1): Cheri J. Meiners M.Ed.: 9781575421247: Amazon.com: Books Article: Why You Shouldn’t Force Your Kids to Share Why You Shouldn't Force Your Kid to Share (verywellfamily.com) Podcast: Always Evolving: Validate, Investigate, Regulate Parenting Evolved: Validate, Investigate, Regulate - YouTube Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Michael and Elizabeth explore barriers to busy parents setting and maintaining personal goals. They discuss the importance of parents making themselves a priority and how this sets a great example for your children. Michael and Elizabeth provide ideas on how to set goals and ways to follow through on the necessary habits to reach these goals. Resources: Book: Atomic Habits by James Clear Book: Better than Before by Gretchen Rubin App: Productive Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Michael and Elizabeth discuss the difficulties of peer conflict and natural tendencies as parents to be either under or overly involved in this conflict. They discuss ways to ensure your child is being supported, as well as suggestions for your role in this process. They provide tangible take-aways on meeting your child’s emotional needs, as well as assisting your child in learning necessary lessons to carry throughout life. Resources: Book: Boundaries with Kids by Cloud and Townsend Book: The Teen's Guide to Social Skills: Practical Advice for Building Empathy, Self-Esteem, and Confidence by Kate Fitzsimons Title: Parenting Self-Care: Preparing for the New Year Description: Michael and Elizabeth explore barriers to busy parents setting and maintaining personal goals. They discuss the importance of parents making themselves a priority and how this sets a great example for your children. Michael and Elizabeth provide ideas on how to set goals and ways to follow through on the necessary habits to reach these goals. Resources: Book: Atomic Habits by James Clear Book: Better than Before by Gretchen Rubin App: Productive Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Welcome back to Always Evolving. In this week’s episode, Liz and Mike discuss the best ways to help deal with your child when they have a nightmare. They get into the reasons why nightmares happen. Liz and Mike also break down how to prevent nightmares for kid along with the best things to do in the moment when a child wakes up from a nightmare. They also go over the best tips about how to follow up the morning after a nightmare. Resources: Calm, Cool and Connected Podcast: How to Get Your Child To Fall Asleep Faster Article: How to Help Kids With Nightmares How to Help Kids With Nightmares | Parenting… | PBS KIDS for Parents Article: 6 Steps To Stop Scary Dreams Nightmares: 6 Steps to Stop Scary Dreams | Parents Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Welcome back to Always Evolving. In this week’s episode, Liz and Mike look at all the reasons why it is so hard to wake up your kid. They break down how to look at the most important questions to ask about why it might be so hard for your youth in the mornings. Liz and Mike discuss the importance of an evening and morning routine along with the importance of positive praise when things are going right. Lastly, they give 8 great tips on how to structure the mornings for a great wake up. Resources: Always Evolving Video: How To Get Your Child To Comply WIthout Consequences Episode 41 - How to Get Your Kid to Comply Without Consequences - YouTube Always Evolving Video: Help! My Kid Won’t Sleep! Help! My Kid Won’t Sleep! - YouTube Article: How To Wake A Sleep Teenager How To Wake A Sleeping Teenager (scarymommy.com) Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Welcome back to Always Evolving. In this week’s episode, Liz and Mike dig into the reasons why your teen doesn’t want to spend time with you the way that they used to. And yes, your teen probably still loves you. Liz and Mike review that it is developmentally appropriate for your teen to focus more on their peers than their parents. Liz and Mike also give ways to examine if your relationship with your teen is strong enough for them to want to spend time with you. Lastly, Liz and Mike give 5 practical tips that any parent can use to help increase their quality time with their teen. Resources: Always Evolving Video: Strengthening Your Relationship With Your Kid, Part 1 Strengthening Your Relationship With Your Kid (Part 1) - YouTube Always Evolving Video: Strengthening Your Relationship With Your Kid, Part 2 Strengthening Your Relationship With Your Kid (Part 2) - YouTube Article: How To Connect With A Teen That Doesn’t Want To Talk How To Connect With A Teen That Doesn't Want to Talk | A Parenting Resources Guide - Hand in Hand Parenting Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Welcome back to Always Evolving. In this week’s episode, Liz and Mike talk about ways to support your child with anxiety. They go through the obvious not so obvious signs of anxiety that your child may show. Liz and Mike also review the importance of co-regulation with your child as well as the ways to help your child co-regulate. They also give some great take-away’s for how to avoid shaming your child for their anxiety. Resources: NPR Podcast: How To Help A Child With Anxiety How To Help A Child With Anxiety : Life Kit : NPR Article: Helping Your Anxious Child or Teen Helping Your Anxious Child or Teen | Here to Help Article: Strategies To Support Anxious Children Strategies to support anxious children (beyondblue.org.au) Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Divorce is a really difficult and confusing time for both parents and kids. Transitioning to new living environments, the financial burden, and the emotional toll can all be really overwhelming. On top of that, trying to remain calm and present for your kids can feel almost impossible. In this episode, Mike and Liz discuss ways to help both you and your child navigate through the divorce process. They provide ideas on ways meet your child’s social-emotional needs during this time, while also ensuring that you are taking care of yourself. Resources: Good Parenting Through Your Divorce: The Essential Guidebook to Helping Your Children Adjust and Thrive Based on the Leading National Program: Hannibal, Mary Ellen: 9781569242575: Amazon.com: Books The Co-Parenting Handbook: Raising Well-Adjusted and Resilient Kids from Little Ones to Young Adults through Divorce or Separation: Bonnell, Karen, Little, Kristin: 9781632171467: Amazon.com: Books Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Welcome back to Always Evolving. In this week’s episode, Liz and Mike talk about the best ways to help “scaffold” and support your child so that they can succeed at school. Liz and Mike take a controversial stance on whether parents should focus on grades as well as the importance of praising your child. They go through the importance of a daily routine and having a dedicated homework space. Resources: Getting Your Kid To Do What You Ask - YouT ube Strengthening Your Relationship With Your Kid (Part 2) - YouTube How to Help Your Child Get Motivated in School - Child Mind Institute Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Parents are often looking for the most effective discipline techniques, when in fact, getting your kid to comply prior to using discipline is actually the most effective approach for increasing compliance and is also the best method for maintaining the quality of the parent-child relationship. Mike and Liz explore through various methods to help you to get your kid to listen and comply without the need for consequences. Resources: Beyond Time-Out: From Chaos to Calm: Grosshans Ph.D., Beth A., Burton L.C.S.W., Janet H.: 9781402777646: Amazon.com: Books Strengthening Your Relationship With Your Kid (Part 1) - YouTube Strengthening Your Relationship With Your Kid (Part 2) - YouTube Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer

Welcome back to Always Evolving. In this week’s episode, Liz and Mike talk about the tips and tricks to be a patient parent, even when it’s really difficult. Kids can do a great job at pushing our buttons and getting us angry. Elizabeth and Michael go over their 4 steps for success so that you can remain calm. Tune in to find out the ways to stay cool even when your child is heating up. Resources: Communicating More Effectively (Five Necessary Skills) - YouTube Why Do Kids Lie? - YouTube How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids by Carla Naumburg PhD | Audiobook | Audible.com Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer Royalty free music from https://www.fesliyanstudios.com

Elizabeth and Michael detail how to stop always having to play the “bad cop” when parenting.  They get into how to break up the patterns and present a united front..  Elizabeth and Michael review the ways you can build upon where you agree and how to dole out consequences together.  They finish up with emphasizing the importance of giving lots of praise and not just focusing on consequences   Areas to address: -Why it’s a problem:             -Makes one parent ineffective in dealing with discipline             -Breeds anger and resentment toward the Bad Cop -It’s important to present a united front  -Need to have some tough conversations with your parenting partner -Identify the areas of parenting/discipline where you differ and are similar (You can build off of where you agree and why you agree on those) -Make plans when you are calm about how to deal with areas where you differ:-what each of you will do and say -If you disagree about something, commit to do so in private -Deal with giving out consequences together, good cop be the one to say what they are -Make sure you are giving lots of positive labeled praise    Take aways:  -Be aware of where you disagree and make a plan -Disagree in private -Give lots of praise, don’t just focus on consequences Resources: 5 Steps Toward a Healthier Parenting Dynamic: 5 Steps Toward a Healthier Parenting Dynamic | Psychology Today   Good Cop/Bad Cop Parenting: Why it Doesn’t Work: Good Cop/Bad Cop Parenting: Why It Doesn’t Work & How It Does Damage – SheKnows   A Mother is Tired of Being The Bad Cop: Mother is tired of being the bad cop (irishtimes.com)   Strenghtening Your Relationship With Your Kid, parts 1 & 2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RCMfwLx2URw&t=55s Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer Royalty free music from https://www.fesliyanstudios.com

Michael and Elizabeth discuss the fourth and final attachment style, secure attachment. They discuss how this attachment style develops in childhood, as well as how it can be achieved later in life if it was not the primary attachment style developed for an individual. They provide insights regarding how a secure attachment style impact all types of relationships and the benefits of working to achieve this attachment style. Resources: -Raising a Secure Child: How Circle of Security Parenting Can Help You Nurture Your Child's Attachment, Emotional Resilience, and Freedom to Explore by Hoffman, Cooper, & Powell  Attachment Theory Workbook: Why is your attachment type impacting upon your happiness in relationships? Discover how to identify who is right for you and help to heal your wounds by David Lawson  Disclaimer Http://www.evolvecounselingaz.com/disclaimer Royalty free music from https://www.fesliyanstudios.com