Middle Man

In this special anniversary episode of Middle Man I sit down with my wife, Michelle, for a candid reflection on one year of exploring midlife as a man. I answer questions submitted by listeners that cover everything from what I've learned from doing the show and favourite guests and episodes to my own emotional health and self-worth, retirement, and building a more intentional life. During the conversation I share how far I've come, from feeling lost and apathetic to having a renewed sense of direction and purpose, thanks in part to the podcast itself and to coaching, and in part to simple daily habits like cold water immersion and journaling. We discuss the surprising emotional impact the podcast has had, listener feedback, and how talking openly has deepened our relationship. But I also open up about setbacks, especially around self-doubt and the challenge of building Middle Man into something bigger - an essential resource hub for men in midlife. The episode is honest, vulnerable and full of insight not just for men navigating their own midlife reset, but also for their partners. If you’ve ever questioned what’s next or how to regain your spark, this conversation is packed with reflections and tools to help. --------------- If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

Many midlife men feel isolated or overwhelmed but remain silent, often unaware that help is available or assuming they just need to ‘get on with it’. As a direct result they grapple with a number of emotional, social and practical challenges, from dwindling friendships and financial strain to burnout, low self-esteem, and a loss of joy. This week Paul is joined by Darren Lawrence, a coach and consultant to men who recently conducted a study called Understanding Men in Midlife that looks at what challenges midlife men face and what the hidden realities of male midlife are. They discuss the key findings from Darren’s research, including that 78% of men believe more support is needed, while over a quarter are either just surviving or feeling completely overwhelmed. Friendship loss and low energy top the list of concerns, yet many don’t know where to turn. Reflecting on his own experiences with redundancy, divorce and career reinvention, Darren opens up about how these events sparked his passion for helping other men navigate similar transitions. He also challenges the myth that ‘men don’t talk’, and calls for better awareness of how we support midlife wellbeing in families, workplaces, and communities. --------------- You can connect with Darren on LinkedIn. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

Whether it’s a failed relationship or a career that is no longer fulfilling, many midlife men find themselves trapped in a life that they can no longer tolerate. Regardless, they try and live a conventional life governed by traditional expectations and practical considerations; working unfulfilling jobs to support a family, suppressing creative ambitions, and slowly losing touch with their identity. This week Paul is joined by Paul Marsh who, after 30 years of suffering a profound sense of purposelessness, is determined to make changes. Feeling trapped and isolated, he battled poor mental health for years, eventually leaving a relationship that wasn’t working and following a lifelong passion to try and establish himself as an artist. In a deeply personal conversation, Paul tells the story of how what began as a small, private escape became a vital source of self-expression, mental healing, and ultimately, professional ambition. He speaks candidly about the financial and emotional challenges of midlife change, the gender dynamics of the art world, and why he believes creativity is a vital outlet for men who struggle to articulate their emotions. Paul’s journey offers insight, inspiration and hope for anyone ready to rewrite their own story. --------------- You can connect with Paul on Instagram at @pfmarsh. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

There has been a huge rise in the number of autism and ADHD diagnoses over the last two decades. And while many midlife men have spent years being treated for anxiety or depression without ever understanding the root cause, there could be a link between their mental health struggles and undiagnosed neurodiversity. This week Paul is joined by Dr Martin Brunet, author of the book Your Worry Makes Sense, to explore the hidden mental health struggles faced by midlife men and how neurodivergent conditions like autism and ADHD often go unrecognised in men in their 40s and 50s. Cultural and generational factors have led to underdiagnosis, but greater awareness today is helping men make sense of lifelong challenges. Martin discusses how understanding your own mental health and potential neurodiversity can lead to more compassionate self-management and a more sustainable lifestyle. The conversation also highlights the unique pressures midlife men face: career responsibility, caregiving roles, and the tendency to ‘push on’ rather than ask for help. And Martin’s message is clear: education is empowerment, and understanding your own mental landscape could be the first step to a more balanced, fulfilling life. --------------- You can follow Martin on Instagram and buy Your Worry Makes Sense on Amazon. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

Menopause exploded into the public consciousness a few years ago thanks largely to the book Menopausing by Davina McCall and Dr Naomi Potter. While a woman’s experience of menopause is deeply personal, it also touches the men around them - partners, colleagues, friends, and family. This week Paul is joined by co-author of Menopausing and founder of the UK’s leading menopause clinic, Dr Potter. Through the lens of the people who love the women going through it, they explore the realities of menopause and perimenopause in an attempt to gain a better understanding of their impact. Naomi explains the difference between perimenopause and menopause, highlighting the chaotic hormone fluctuations, the 70+ symptoms women may face, and the mental toll it can take, including loss of identity, confidence, and energy.  The conversation delves into the stigma and misdiagnosis still surrounding menopause, and Naomi discusses how awareness is growing and encourages men to educate themselves, listen with empathy, and avoid personalising the emotional and behavioural changes they might witness. This episode is a must-listen for any man wanting to better support the women in his life and for anyone curious about the emotional, physical, and relational impacts of menopause. --------------- You can follow Naomi on Instagram and buy Menopausing on Amazon. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

Coping mechanisms can take many forms for midlife men, from drinking a bit too much to isolating oneself to overworking to emotional eating. Self harm can be at the more extreme end of the scale, but it is not uncommon for a man experiencing burnout, anxiety or depression to use this as a way of getting through life. This week Paul is joined by David Salmon for a deeply personal and raw conversation. David has been though a number of traumatic life events in recent years, and opens up about confronting in midlife a deep-rooted coping mechanism that no longer served him. He describes the challenges that have shadowed him since his teenage years and culminated in a crisis during the pandemic. Through therapy, self-reflection, and supportive relationships, David has gradually learned to understand his mental health, identifying patterns of self-criticism, stress responses, and the shame that often keeps men suffering in silence. He speaks candidly about the emotional toll of being a people pleaser in high-pressure work environments, the loneliness of modern male life, and the importance of creating space for meaning and connection beyond career achievements. If you or anyone around you is affected by this episode, you can contact The Samaritans on 116 123 or text 'SHOUT' to 85258. --------------- You can connect with David on LinkedIn. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

The divorce rate among men in their 40s is the highest of any age group, remaining stubbornly high at a time when the overall rate of divorce is falling. At a time when several other areas of life can be challenging, the failure of a marriage in midlife can have a devastating impact.  This week Paul talks to Sara Davison, AKA The Divorce Coach, about why so many midlife marriages falter and how to regain momentum when they do. She describes the emotional paralysis many feel post-divorce, and explains how divorce in midlife isn’t just a legal process; it’s an emotional, financial, and identity-shattering event. Sara also shares her very personal journey from the trauma of a blindsiding breakup to becoming one of the UK’s most respected breakup and divorce coaches. Drawing on her own devastating experience and years of coaching, she explores factors such as unspoken resentments, poor communication, and simply growing apart. Sara also explains how men and women experience and process divorce differently, why midlife can be a period of profound self-reassessment, and how rebuilding a sense of purpose is essential. If you’re facing the end of a relationship or navigating the emotional aftermath, this episode is filled with compassionate insight, practical advice on regaining momentum, and the power of clarity to help you take back control of your life. --------------- You can find out more about Sara's work at saradavison.com or follow her on Instagram at @saradavisondivorcecoach If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

Losing your job in midlife can be take a significant emotional and psychological toll. From guilt, shame and loss of identity, redundancy is often accompanied by a messy and non-linear form of grief. Making space for that pain is a vital part of recovery, but once you have acknowledged that it is time to start to embrace possibility. This week Paul talks to career change coach and the author of the book Why Losing Your Job Could Be the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You, Eleanor Twedell. She believes that in your darkest hour, you can begin to shape a life that’s more aligned, meaningful, and entirely your own. As such, she says that job loss can actually lead to empowerment and growth. Eleanor shares her deeply personal story of being made redundant at 40 during a time of immense personal upheaval. She also shares practical models to help others move forward. These range from identifying immediate needs v long-term wants, to choosing whether to stick, twist, or completely reinvent. For some, redundancy is a gateway to freedom, courage, and purpose. For others, it’s a route back into their careers - wiser, clearer, and on their own terms. --------------- You can find buy Why Losing Your Job Could Be the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You on Amazon, and connect with Eleanor on LinkedIn. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

Many people fall into careers that are not necessarily of their own design, only to wake up two decades later feeling unfulfilled, stressed and miserable. And yet a career change in midlife seems daunting and impractical, and surrounded by potential problems that can seem insurmountable. This week Paul talks to Guido Regazzoni who, after finding himself struggling with stress, insomnia, antidepressants, and an overwhelming sense of dread about work, was made redundant. But after a period of reflection, rather than diving back into the high-pressure office politics that had been taking such a toll on his mental health and family life, he chose to reinvent himself. Guido shares the story of how this new chapter has not only improved his wellbeing, but also given him a renewed sense of purpose. He offers candid insight into the emotional and psychological shifts needed to break free from the ‘zombie state’ of an unfulfilling career and take a leap into something new, even at 49. His story is a powerful reminder that it’s never too late to reclaim your future and design a more joyful, meaningful life. --------------- You can find out about Guido's fitness studio at emsfitness.io If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

The concept of purpose can be confusing and overplayed in some quarters, with much of the talk around this implying life missions that few can identify. But with questions like “is this it?” and “why am I here?” plaguing many midlife men, there can be little doubt that a sense of purpose is important if we want to thrive in the second half of life. This week Paul talks to keynote speaker and bestselling author David McNally to explore purpose not as a grand, elusive mission but as a series of meaningful contributions to family, community, and workplace. David believes that contributing to those around you can be just as meaningful as trying to tap into a passion that you may not understand or have, and that purpose should be reframed. He also draws a vital distinction between merely surviving and flourishing, arguing that true fulfilment comes from aligning your talents and values with how you serve others. The discussion delves into comparison culture, self-acceptance, shifting perspectives in midlife, and the importance of avoiding cynicism, and David also shares his personal journey, from early entrepreneurial success and sudden burnout in his 30s, to discovering a deeper sense of meaning. This episode is rich with practical insights for anyone questioning their direction in midlife. Whether you’re feeling stuck or simply seeking more joy, this conversation offers encouragement to pause, reflect, and reimagine your next chapter. --------------- You can find out about 'Mark of an Eagle - How Your Life Changes the World' and David's other books on his website. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

Testosterone levels in men typically decrease by 1% to 2% annually from age 30, and in midlife can fall below optimum. In fact, the average 22 year old today has lower testosterone than the average 70 year old had just 50 years ago. In an estimated 40% of men, this can lead to symptoms including low energy, brain fog, loss of motivation, emotional flatness and reduced libido. This week Paul talks to James Davis, the author of The Midlife Male Handbook, which takes a holistic view of transitioning through andropause. Drawing from his background in psychology and personal experience, James discusses how he naturally boosted his testosterone without turning to testosterone replacement therapy (TRT), and talks about the impact of elements such as diet, exercise, stress management, sleep, and the often-overlooked psychological tools that can restore vitality and self-worth during midlife. James also unpacks the societal stigma around male hormones, the lack of medical awareness about andropause, and how men often suffer in silence due to outdated ideas of masculinity. The conversation highlights why midlife is a critical turning point - not a crisis - and how embracing this phase can lead to a more fulfilling second act. This episode is a must-listen for any man in his 40s or 50s questioning his energy, purpose or direction and dismissing these questions as ‘just ageing’. It provides a better understanding of hormones, mindset, and how small, sustainable changes can have a huge impact on wellbeing. --------------- You can buy The Midlife Male Handbook on Amazon and follow @midlifementors on Instagram If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

The gradual ageing and then passing away of our parents is inevitable during midlife. But navigating the grief and the emotional turmoil that comes with the death of our fathers is incredibly complex. It can be the catalyst for many profound male midlife experiences, including both reflection and transformation. This week’s show features a deeply personal, raw and honest conversation between Paul and Ben Veal about grief, burnout, fatherhood and midlife identity. Bonded by the shared experience of losing their fathers in 2023, Ben and Paul talk about loss, resilience and rediscovery. Ben opens up about the impact of losing his dad, the emotional weight of stepping into the role of “the oldest male” in his family, and how this life-altering loss has shifted his perspective from chasing professional accolades to focusing on purpose, health, and legacy. He discusses the toll of running a small business during an economic downturn, raising two neurodivergent children, and juggling multiple creative ventures, and reflects on using creativity as a coping mechanism. This moving episode is about the emotional realities of middle age and what it really means to grow into the next phase of life with intention. --------------- You can connect with Ben on LinkedIn and buy "From Badd to Good: The Inspiring Story of a Wrestling Wildman" on Amazon If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

It is often repeated that ‘men don’t talk’ and that, if they did, there would not be a mental health crisis among midlife men. Luke Ambler established ANDYSMANCLUB in 2016 following the tragic loss of his brother-in-law to suicide. Recognising the urgent need for safe spaces where men could open up without judgment, he started a small support group that has since grown into a network of hundreds of clubs across the UK, helping thousands of men each week. In this powerful and raw episode of Middle Man, Paul talks to Luke about his deeply personal journey, from experiencing his own mental health struggles to creating a national movement that encourages men to open up and seek support. Together they challenge the myth that men don’t talk, arguing that they just need the right environment to feel safe and supported, and discuss why the phrase "it's OK not to be OK" is dangerous. Luke explores the stigma around male vulnerability and discusses the importance of accountability. His no-nonsense approach cuts through the social media noise on this topic, and he offers practical advice on resilience, self-care, and taking ownership of your mental wellbeing. If you or someone you know is struggling, this is a must-listen. This episode is also part of Podcastathon, a global charitable initiative where podcasters around the world dedicate one episode of their show to a charity of their choice. Over 1500 shows are releasing special episodes simultaneously to raise awareness for those causes. --------------- You can find your local group at www.andysmanclub.co.uk. If you have been affected by the themes discussed in this show, you can contact The Samaritans on 116 123 or text 'shout' to 85258. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

There’s very little more soul destroying for a midlife man than working in a job or a career for which he has lost his passion. And yet we tell ourselves the story that everyone has to do this, that it’s only for another 15 or 20 years, and that then we can retire and enjoy ourselves. Not realising that that impact of doing something that doesn’t fulfil you for two decades is incredibly detrimental to your health and wellbeing. This week Paul talks to Ken Valledy, who works with midlife men to explore the possibilities of entrepreneurship and to help them break free of the constraints of lifelong careers that they don’t enjoy. Ken believes that if you’re someone who’s reached a stage in your life where you want more from the time you spend at work, it’s within your power to do something about that, no matter whether you’re a corporate high flyer or a painter and decorator. While there’s an awful lot to be said for pivoting career in midlife, there are also practical implications, mostly around money. But Ken challenges the notion that people must endure careers they no longer enjoy because of finances, and argues that alternative paths, such as side hustles or starting a business, are within reach for many to find fulfillment. He debunks some of the myths surrounding entrepreneurship, and introduces a practical approach designed to help individuals take small, manageable steps toward career independence. If you’re fed up in your job but feel powerless to do anything about it, this episode will prove to you that there’s more to life than waiting for retirement. --------------- You can contact Ken on LinkedIn and buy The Startup Lexicon on Amazon. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

The andropause, or the male menopause, is the decline in testosterone that occurs naturally in men from their mid 30s onwards. Unlike the female menopause, the hormonal changes we experience are slow and subtle. And unlike the menopause, andropause is not a widely recognised medical condition. But the impact of low testosterone can be significant in some men. Ross Tomkins is the co-founder of Alphagenix, which offers medically supervised testosterone replacement therapy. He founded the company to help men following his own experiences within both the NHS and private practice. He believes that not only are many men misdiagnosed with depression rather than low testosterone, but that most GPs have not even heard of the andropause.  This week Paul talks to Ross about how low testosterone typically manifests and what the impact can be on men’s mental and physical health. Ross shares his personal journey of struggling with low testosterone, being dismissed by multiple doctors, and ultimately finding answers through testosterone replacement therapy (TRT). He discusses why men are often prescribed antidepressants instead of addressing underlying hormonal imbalances. The conversation explores the stigma around low testosterone, the reluctance of men to seek help, and how lifestyle factors like diet, sleep, and exercise can naturally boost hormone levels before considering TRT. Ross also highlights the potential long-term implications of declining testosterone levels, including its links to midlife crises and even male suicide rates. If you feel like you’ve lost your drive, energy or motivation, this episode provides crucial insights into why that might be, and what you can do about it. --------------- You can find out more about testosterone replacement therapy at www.alphagenix.co.uk and contact Ross on LinkedIn. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

Life changes can come thick and fast during midlife. From changes to family set up, whether that be having children or marriage break ups or kids leaving home, to shifts in career, to changes in location and social dynamics, to parental illness and death, midlife can be a tumultuous time when it is easy to fine yourself feeling overwhelmed, disconnected and lost. This week Paul talks to Paul Flynn who, after a number of big life changes in his late 30s and early 40s, found himself feeling isolated, unfulfilled and longing for his former lifestyle. But then he discovered outdoor swimming and the trajectory of his life changed radically. What started as a solo pursuit led to the creation of a new wild swimming club and a community offering midlife men the opportunity to reconnect with themselves, nature, and each other. Paul shares how swimming in icy waters became a game-changer for his mental wellbeing, reigniting his sense of adventure, forging new friendships and creating a new career path. And he talks about the importance of saying “yes” to new experiences and the small but powerful steps that can shift midlife from a crisis to a new beginning. --------------- You can find out more about the Blue Bloods Wild Swim Club on Facebook. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

Cold water immersion has gained a reputation over the last few years as a bit of a cure-all for both physical and mental wellbeing, whether that’s wild swimming or a plunge pool or cold showers. But what does the science actually say?  This week Paul talks to Dr Heather Massey, an environmental physiology researcher at the University of Portsmouth and a passionate outdoor swimmer. Heather brings both academic expertise and personal experience to the topic, exploring how exposure to cold water affects the body and the mind. She explains the cold shock response and what this does to the body physiologically, and talks about the limited studies that have been done to investigate the potential link between cold exposure and mental health. She also shares insights from her current clinical trials investigating such effects and discusses whether the benefits are likely to come from the water itself or the sense of accomplishment that follows immersion. Whether you're a sceptic, a seasoned cold water swimmer, or just curious about the trend, this episode provides an informed and balanced perspective on the potential benefits and risks of cold water immersion. --------------- You can find out more about The OUTdoor Swimming as a nature-based Intervention for DEpression (OUTSIDE) study at outside2.co.uk If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast

When it comes to therapy, men are reluctant to seek help. Most will only turn to psychotherapy when they hit crisis point, and even many of those who do seek out help will only do so because they’ve been given an ultimatum by their partner.  This week Paul talks to Bill Sullivan, a psychotherapist who does a lot of work with middle aged men, about how therapy could and should support people navigating the challenges of midlife. Bill explains the emotional avoidance that has shaped generations and, within that context, why societal expectations means that many men hesitate to seek help when they need it. He shares insights into how therapy helps men identify and process emotions, break patterns of low self-esteem, and develop healthier coping strategies. And we dive into the challenges of perceived success, where men who seem to have it all (careers, families, financial stability) still feel lost or unfulfilled.  We also discuss the differences between therapy and coaching, and how therapy focuses on emotions and uncovering the root causes of struggles. If you’ve ever wondered whether therapy could benefit you, this show will give you the answer. --------------- Connect with Bill on LinkedIn. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-therapy-last-resort

Loneliness among midlife men is at epidemic levels. One in five men report having no close friends, and loneliness is reported to be as bad for you as smoking or drinking excessively. Some argue that it is more dangerous than cancer due to the sheer number of people it impacts and its mental and physical effects. David Robson is the author of the book Laws of Connection, which explores why social connection matters even more than we thought, and how to build better relationships and improve our lives. This week, Paul talks to David about the science of human connection, why so many people, men in particular, struggle to form deep friendships, and how societal norms contribute to this. David explains key psychological concepts from his book including creating shared realities and the liking gap, which causes people to underestimate how much others like them. He also discusses prioritising honesty over kindness to form deeper, more meaningful relationships. For anyone feeling disconnected or unsure how to deepen their social bonds, David offers actionable insights and practical strategies grounded in psychology to overcome social anxiety, build confidence in social situations and foster stronger relationships. --------------- Buy the book Laws of Connection on Amazon. If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-loneliness

Sleep is something that it’s incredibly important we pay close attention to for our physical health and mental wellbeing. Or so we are led to believe by the media. But acclaimed sleep physiologist Stephanie Romiszewski has a different take on this. She says that we have to stop worrying about sleep, as this is doing more harm than good. Stephanie is the founder of Sleepy Head Clinic and has a course on the BBC called Better Sleep, and this week Paul talks to her about sleep in midlife. We discuss how it changes as we age, and what we should be doing - and not doing - to ensure our sleep patterns are natural and restorative without becoming a focus for our lives. We talk about why consistent wake-up times are more important than rigid bedtimes, how to manage poor sleep without spiraling into frustration, and the science behind light exposure in regulating our body clocks. Stephanie also explains why popular sleep aids and strict ‘sleep hygiene’ routines might not be as effective as they seem. She also highlights the importance of understanding sleep systems, like your sleep drive and circadian rhythm, and offers strategies to rest better without creating unhealthy habits. Whether you’re a lifelong insomniac or someone looking to optimise your overall wellbeing, Stephanie’s practical, science-back advice will bust some common myths, improve your sleep habits and change the way you think about sleep forever. --------------- Find out more about Stephanie’s personalised sleep support at www.sleepyheadclinic.co.uk or check out her online course at www.re-sleep.com If you’ve found this episode insightful or interesting, you can support the show at www.ko-fi.com/middlemanpodcast I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at paul@middlemanpodcast.com and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com Middle Man on Instagram: @middleman__podcast Middle Man on Facebook: @middlemanpodcast You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-sleep