Unzipping Taboos: Candid Conversations about Sex

Why do people cheat? In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we unzip the messy realities of infidelity. From unmet needs and boredom to revenge, immaturity, or even unresolved trauma, we unpack the many reasons someone might stray — including situations where cheating happens despite a seemingly “happy” relationship.We also distinguish between cheating and consensual non-monogamy, explore the lasting impact on relationships, and ask what it really takes to heal if a couple chooses to stay together. Because at the end of the day, working through the “why” and the “what now” of infidelity comes down to communication, honesty, and self-awareness.Whether you’ve been cheated on, have cheated yourself, or just want to better understand the psychology behind it, this candid conversation shines a light on one of the most painful and misunderstood experiences in relationships.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we unzip the tangled narratives around birth control, emergency contraception, and abortion. Too often, political headlines and misinformation blur these terms together — leaving people confused, misinformed, or even shamed for making decisions about their own bodies.We break down the difference between preventing pregnancy and ending one, highlighting how methods like the pill, IUDs, and emergency contraception actually work — and how political rhetoric blurs those lines to push an agenda. We talk about why it matters that we get the science and terminology right, and we question why those who claim to be “pro-life” often fight against the very tools that prevent unplanned pregnancies like comprehensive sex ed and accessible contraception. Together, we call out the dangerous conflation of birth control and abortion, and emphasize the importance of accurate sex ed, and the importance of accountability from policymakers.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

“U.S. fertility rate hits an all-time low — less than 1.6 kids per woman…”  Sounds like an emergency that women are solely responsible for, right? Not so fast.In this episode, we unzip the nuance behind those sensationalist headlines, breaking down the difference between infertility and national fertility rates — ahem, birth rates — and why conflating the two isn’t just misleading, it’s harmful for everyone.We explore how the media often pins declining birth rates on women, while ignoring the real drivers behind reproductive decisions: restrictive laws, lack of parental leave, unaffordable childcare, rising maternal mortality, and — let’s be real — the fact that some people just don’t want kids And that’s valid.Join us as we unzip what a headline about “fertility rate” really means — and why it’s time to stop blaming women for a trend that reflects a much bigger, more complex pictureIf you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

Pronouns are more than grammar—they’re about respect, identity, and creating safer spaces for everyone. In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we unzip the power of pronouns in conversations about sex, gender, and relationships. From understanding what they are (and aren’t), to why they matter so deeply, we break down the cultural tension and political pushback surrounding something that should be simple: calling people what they want to be called.We discuss the generational learning curves, how language evolves, and the dangers of forced disclosure policies. With our signature humor, honesty, and empathy, we  explore the harm of misgendering, the lifesaving impact of affirming language, and how we can all do better—even if we’re still learning. Because using the right pronoun isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being present.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

We’re back for Part 2 of our dive into men’s health — and this time, we’re going deeper into the quiet, often invisible pressures that men face around body image, masculinity, and emotional wellbeing.We continue to explore how the “man box” not only limits expression but also distorts how men see themselves — physically and emotionally. From six-pack abs to emotional stoicism, we break down the messages men are fed and how those expectations show up in relationships, mental health, and even doctor’s visits (or lack thereof).We unzip how these issues affect intimacy, how shame and silence keep men from seeking help, and why it’s time for all of us — men, women, partners, parents, providers — to stop mocking, start listening, and rewrite the scripts around masculinity.This episode is a call to shift from judgment to curiosity, from silence to support. Because unzipping men’s health means making space for vulnerability — and that benefits everyone.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

What do you do when you don’t have access to someone like Dr. Sue? For many people, the answer is: Dr. Google.In this episode, we’re unzipping the pros and cons of turning to online searches, AI tools, and social media for answers to sex and health questions. We unzip why people turn to the internet—often out of necessity—and how it can be both empowering and problematic. We talk about the convenience, anonymity, and access online platforms can offer, especially for those without trusted providers or inclusive care. But we also explore the risks: misinformation, shame-driven algorithms, biased sources, and search results shaped by politics and profit.From privacy concerns and symptom checkers, to Reddit rabbit holes and the need for critical thinking, this conversation is for anyone who’s ever typed a vulnerable question into a search bar and hoped for something close to the truth.Because sometimes the internet is the best option—and we think you deserve better than a vague blog post or sponsored ad.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

We made it to 50 episodes—and for the first time ever, you can watch us talk about sex (and all the things that come with it). That’s right: Unzipping Taboos is officially a video podcast! Whether you're tuning in on Spotify or YouTube, welcome to our faces.In this milestone episode, we reflect on how far we've come—from a humble Q&A idea to a full-blown show committed to candid, inclusive, and often-censored conversations about sexuality. We talk about what’s changed, what we’re still fighting for (hello, shadowbanning), the feedback that fuels us, and the big dreams we have for what’s next.Join us as we celebrate this moment, say thank you, and unzip a little behind-the-scenes honesty about what it really takes to make sex ed happen.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In Part 1 of this 2 part conversation, we begin to unzip the disconnect between what we know about men’s health and what actually gets talked about (or acted on). We look at how the cultural expectations of masculinity shape how men see their bodies, their emotions, and their healthcare decisions.We talk about why so many men avoid the doctor, the toll of untreated mental health issues, the reality behind sexual health gaps, and how gender norms quietly influence everything from check-ups to suicide rates. If you’ve ever wondered why men’s health feels like an afterthought — or if you’ve tried to support a man who’s resistant to going to therapy or the doctor — this conversation offers a human, judgment-free lens on a very real public health issue.Check out A Call to Men and the important work they do around education and community to transform the social expectations of masculinity. To learn more about “The Man Box” check out: What is The Man Box and Tony Porter’s Ted TalkIf you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

Why is the United States—one of the wealthiest nations in the world—leading in maternal deaths among high-income countries? And why are Black women three times more likely to die from pregnancy-related causes than white women?In this episode, we unzip the urgent and often-overlooked crisis of maternal mortality in the U.S. We dig into how systemic racism, lack of access to quality healthcare for everyone, abortion restrictions, and profit-driven medical systems contribute to hundreds of preventable deaths each year. Highlighting that this isn’t a “new” problem, but one that has been allowed to persist in the shadows—especially for women of color.We also talk about the human cost of recent abortion bans, the chilling effect on healthcare providers, and the hypocrisy in the "pro-life" movement, while doing so little to protect people throughout pregnancy, during childbirth, and through post-partum. This conversation is a call to stop looking away and start giving a damn.Whether you’re someone who’s planning a pregnancy, supporting someone through one, or simply believe in human rights—this episode is for you.Because birth shouldn’t be a death sentence. And staying silent? That’s not an option.To learn more about the important work and information Black Mamas Matter does, click here: https://blackmamasmatter.org Click here to find the article Dr. Sue talked about, you can find that here: https://blackmamasmatter.org/our-work/key-readings/To learn more about this and find ways you can become involved - check out The Center for Reproductive Rights: https://reproductiverights.org/our-regions/united-states/If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

Pelvic floor therapy isn't just about Kegels—and it isn’t just for women. In this follow-up episode with pelvic health physical therapist Dr. Cara, we go deeper into what it really means to treat the whole person through the pelvic floor. From bowel issues to sexual pain to emotional trauma, this conversation reveals the wide-ranging impact pelvic health has on everyday life, and why so many patients—especially men—aren’t getting the care they need.Together, we tackle misconceptions about chronic pain and the very real risks of following advice like “just do Kegel exercises.” They also explore how emotional wellness, professional collaboration, and inclusive communication shape better outcomes for patients of all genders and backgrounds.Whether you're curious about how pelvic therapy works, frustrated by misdiagnosis, or simply want to feel seen in your health journey, this episode makes space for all of it—with honesty, heart, and humor.Want to learn more about Dr. Cara and how pelvic floor physical therapy can support your health? Explore her Patient Education page for approachable, helpful info on the many conditions it can help treat—and how to get started.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

What do leaking, libido, and lower back pain have in common? More than you might think. In this episode, we sit down with pelvic floor physical therapist Dr. Cara to talk all things pelvic health—from the muscles you didn’t know you had to the intimate connections between pain, pleasure, and pelvic function.We dive into what a pelvic floor physical therapy evaluation actually looks like, what your nervous system has to do with your pelvic muscles, and why pelvic PT is still so misunderstood—even by medical professionals. Dr. Cara shares personal insights, professional tips, and candid truths about working in a healthcare system that doesn’t always make room for whole-person care.This episode is a must-listen for anyone who’s ever had sex, plans to, or simply wants to feel more at home in their body. Whether you’re dealing with pain, curious about your anatomy, or just want to know what your pelvic floor has been up to all these years—we’ve got you.Want to learn more about Dr. Cara and how pelvic floor physical therapy can support your health? Explore her Patient Education page for approachable, helpful info on the many conditions it can help treat—and how to get started.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

The term sex positive is everywhere—on social media, in classrooms, even in dating profiles. But is it as inclusive and liberating as it claims to be?In this episode, we dig into the unintended consequences of a term that's often used as a shorthand for open-mindedness, but can actually create new forms of judgment and exclusion. We share personal stories and lived experiences that reveal how the label can oversimplify complex truths, alienate those who’ve experienced harm, and silence voices that don’t fit a certain narrative. What happens when a term meant to fight shame ends up reinforcing it? And what if a better framework is sexual freedom—a more nuanced, inclusive way to talk about consent, pleasure, boundaries, and autonomy without expecting everyone to perform sexuality a certain way?This is a conversation for anyone who's ever felt out of place in “sex positive” spaces, questioned what empowerment really means, or wondered whether it's time to rethink the words we use and the assumptions we make about what being open about sex should look like.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsTo read Dr. Sue’s take on sex positivity check out this Medium article

In this episode, we team up with Annette Benedetti, host of Talk Sex with Annette, to do a deep dive into the controversial notion of “sex addiction.” We unpack why sex addiction is not recognized as a legitimate diagnosis and explore how the term is often misused, perpetuating myths that can shame and stigmatize people’s sexuality. Together, we challenge the narratives pushed by the treatment center industry and offer a more nuanced understanding of sexual behavior and challenges.We invite you to rethink common assumptions about sexual compulsivity, recognize the harm that pathologizing sexual desire can cause, and embrace a more compassionate, realistic approach to sexual health. This episode encourages open, judgment-free conversations that honor individual experiences without relying on misleading labels.If you haven’t listened to Annette’s podcast yet, we encourage you to check out Talk Sex with Annette.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

Porn isn’t always just a solo activity—it can carry a lot of weight in relationships. In this episode, we dive into the tricky, often unspoken space where porn and partnership intersect. What does it mean if your partner watches porn? When does it cross a boundary? And why does it feel so personal when it might not be?We talk about the emotional complexity behind discovering a partner’s porn use, the assumptions made about what it means, and how those assumptions are shaped by culture, shame, and our own sexual self-understanding. We talk about consent, communication, and why early, honest conversations about porn are important. Whether you’re struggling to bring it up, feeling judged for what you watch, or just trying to understand how porn fits into your relationship, this episode offers a thoughtful and nonjudgmental starting point.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this episode, we unzip what porn literacy actually is. Spoiler: it’s not about whether you watch porn—it’s about how you understand it. From awkward anatomy to unrealistic expectations, we explore how porn shapes our ideas about sex, bodies, and pleasure—and why it’s time to start talking about it without shame.We break down the difference between fantasy and reality, what ethical porn can offer, and how media literacy (yes, even for porn) is a critical part of sexual health. Whether you’re a curious viewer, a confused partner, or just someone trying to make sense of the messages we get about sex, this conversation is about thinking more clearly—and more compassionately—about the role porn plays in our lives.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

In this follow-up to Healing Out Loud: Sex, Survival, and the Path Back to Your Body, we continue unzipping what healing after sexual trauma really looks like—messy, non-linear, and deeply personal. Together, we unpack the emotional, cultural, and physical layers of recovery—from the weight of societal expectations to the quiet, powerful moments of reclaiming pleasure.We explore the many ways trauma can surface, how it’s often misunderstood, and why healing isn’t about “getting over it”—it’s about coming home to yourself. We reflect on what it means to feel safe in your body again, how pleasure can become a powerful act of reclamation, and why these conversations are essential.If you haven’t listened to Annette’s podcast yet, we encourage you to check out Talk Sex with Annette.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this deeply moving and empowering episode, we sit down with Annette Benedetti, sex and intimacy coach, survivor of sexual assault, and host of the podcast Talk Sex with Annette. Together we talk about what it means to reclaim your body, your pleasure, and your desire after trauma. Annette shares her story of surviving rape as a teenager and the long, non-linear process of coming home to herself—through self-love, and joyful exploration.We talk candidly about the messy middle: the cultural myths around being a "perfect victim," and the pressure women face to perform or recover in tidy timelines. We also explore how healing can be tender, playful, embodied, and even sexy.Whether you’ve experienced trauma or love someone who has, this conversation reminds us that pleasure is a birthright—and reconnecting with it is an act of self-trust and power.If you need support check out the National Sexual Assault Hotline: 800-656-4673 (HOPE) or RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network)If you want to learn more about the work Annette does, check out her website or listen to her podcastIf you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this episode, we’re taking a fresh look at sexual milestones—the kind that don’t revolve around “losing your virginity.” That term? It’s vague, outdated, and honestly, we’re not fans of that term. So instead of centering one arbitrary moment in your sexual journey, we’re celebrating all the deeply personal “firsts” that shape our sexual lives: the first time you had an orgasm, the first time you got tested for STIs, the first time you tried a sex toy, or talked about a kink with a partner.These moments may not get talked about much, but they matter. A lot.We talk about the emotional weight of these experiences, especially if you are healing from trauma, navigating body changes, or just trying something new later in life. We even touch on milestones like choosing to end a relationship that is no longer right for you—a powerful act of self-care that deserves recognition too.It’s all about curiosity, compassion, and shifting the narrative around what it means to grow sexually. No matter your history or where you are in your journey, we hope this conversation helps you embrace your own timeline and feel seen in the “firsts” that you’re excited about.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsTake a listen to Dr Sue talk about virginity on Talk Sex With Annette here: Virginity is a scam!

Think about it before you stick it in! In this episode, we unzip the do's and don'ts of shopping for sex toys — because when it comes to your body (and your fun), a little knowledge goes a long way. We break down why non-porous materials like silicone, stainless steel, and body safe plastic are the best options, and why you should steer clear of porous materials like jelly and wood (yep, even if it looks cute).We also get into the nitty-gritty of toy care: how to clean, store, and maintain your toys so they stay safe, fun, and ready for action. Thinking of grabbing a random veggie or a household item? We share why that’s a risky idea.We highlight tips for shopping smart, whether you're hitting up a local boutique for a personalized experience or browsing trusted online retailers like Adam and Eve. We even touch on things you might not have thought about, like noise levels, discreet designs, and toys for people with medical or mobility considerations.Whether you're shopping for your first toy or upgrading your collection, we are here to help you navigate the shelves (and the search results) with confidence. It’s all about making choices that feel good, are safer, and support your pleasure — however you define it.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

Where does sexual shame come from—and how do we start letting it go? In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we unzip some of the complicated ways shame shows up around sex, pleasure, and curiosity. We chat about how cultural messaging (like the old idea that sex is only for making babies) still impacts how people think and feel today—and how hard it can be to find accurate, judgment-free information about sex in a world full of misinformation and censorship.We also get real about the role of the internet: yes, it can be a great place for anonymous questions and advice—but it can also fuel judgment, shame, and confusion. Dr. Sue shares insights from answering anonymous questions online, and we each reflect on how deeply ingrained shame can hold people back from fully understanding and enjoying their sexuality.Throughout the conversation, we offer encouragement for anyone struggling with sexual shame—including tips for tuning out external noise, starting open conversations with trusted people, and knowing when it’s time to reach out to a professional. It’s an honest, compassionate talk about why normalizing conversations around sex isn’t just important—it’s necessary for healing and connection.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question