Unzipping Taboos: Candid Conversations about Sex

What happens when we start asking AI our most vulnerable questions about sex, sexuality, and sexual health? In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we talk candidly about why so many people turn to tools like ChatGPT for answers they’re too embarrassed—or too afraid—to ask out loud, and why that makes digital literacy more important than ever. From biased or incomplete information to the loss of nuance, tone, and human context, we unpack where AI can help and where it falls short—especially around sensitive topics like sexual orientation, reproductive anatomy, and sexual health.We also explore why “trust but verify” needs to be the baseline when using AI for anything related to our bodies. Along the way, we look at real examples of inaccurate AI-generated anatomy, discuss why stigma drives people toward anonymous tech solutions, and share safer, more reliable ways to get accurate sex education.This episode isn’t anti-technology—but it is pro-critical thinking, pro-privacy, and firmly rooted in the belief that AI should supplement human expertise, not replace it. If you’ve ever wondered whether AI is a safe or reliable place to learn about sex, this conversation is for you.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we talk about consent as something that lives far beyond sex—and how often it gets missed in everyday interactions.We explore what consent looks like in friendships, workplaces, classrooms, healthcare settings, and long-term relationships, especially in moments where it’s easy to assume instead of ask. From scrolling through someone’s, to sharing private conversations, to touching someone casually, or continuing an argument when the other person is pulling away—we unpack how often boundaries are crossed without anyone naming it.We talk about implied consent, power dynamics, and why “I didn’t mean harm” isn’t the same thing as having consent. We dig into non-verbal cues, withdrawal, and the importance of taking a beat when someone goes quiet, steps back, or needs space—even when that feels uncomfortable. We also discuss consent in healthcare and elder care, where autonomy and privacy are often overlooked, and why consent still matters even when there’s a baseline duty of care.This conversation is about noticing patterns, unlearning habits, and practicing consent as an ongoing process—not a one-time checkbox. As we say, this isn’t about shame or judgement. It’s about awareness, responsibility, and learning how to respect boundaries in meaningful ways that build trust and connection.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we revisit the “male loneliness epidemic” and the so-called “mating crisis.” Since we first talked about it, something important has shifted: women are finding a voice in this conversation and… men are having a reaction.We talk about women naming their worth, setting clearer boundaries, and no longer organizing their lives around being chosen. We explore how that clarity is reshaping the landscape of relationships and exposing expectations that were long treated as invisible or inevitable.This isn’t an episode about dating tips or diagnosing loneliness. It’s about what happens when long-standing scripts start to break: women stop shrinking, expectations are named clearly, and men need to adapt to a changing landscape rather than be centered by it.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we’re joined by Dr. Karen Rayne, co-founder and Director of Education at UN|HUSHED, to unpack the realities of teaching sex ed without consistent standards or modern resources. We talk about why so many programs still lean on the classic “parenting” simulations (like caring for an egg, a bag of flour, or a crying doll) and how those exercises focus on logistics while missing the emotional, mental, and relational realities of parenting.We also get into what inclusive sex education really means, why accurate language matters, and how sex ed has slowly been pushed out of the home. Karen shares why parents — and other trusted adults — don’t need to be experts to advocate for better education or have meaningful conversations with kids.This conversation is about taking sex education seriously — not as a one-time unit or a box to check, but as real preparation for real life. It’s about moving past stand-ins and silence, and building education that actually reflects the emotional, relational, and human realities young people are navigating every day.Learn more about UN|HUSHED and the resources available for caregivers and professionals.To see your state policies around sex ed, check out the Guttmacher Institute.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this New Year’s Eve episode of Unzipping Taboos, we take a moment to look back on our first full calendar year of podcasting—and everything that’s shifted along the way. Highlighting how Unzipping Taboos has evolved into a show that meets the moment, engages with current events, and stays rooted in real-world experiences.We dig into what our Spotify Wrapped data actually tells us (and what it doesn’t), reflecting on why episodes like The Truth About Body Count, Sex and Aging, and our pelvic floor conversations continue to resonate and get shared. For us, the numbers matter less than what they represent: a growing audience that’s hungry for honest, accessible conversations about sexual health—without shame, sensationalism, or clickbait.We also talk openly about our own journeys into sex education and advocacy—why we do this work, how curiosity and resistance shape the show, and what it’s meant to stay authentic while tackling topics like men’s health, pelvic floor health, sexual trauma recovery, consent, and agency. Along the way, we reflect on how modeling boundaries, communication, and the power of consent has become part of the podcast itself.As we close out the year, we share our gratitude—for our listeners, our guests, our partners (including JackandJillAdult.com), and everyone who’s helped make this first year possible. We also look ahead to what’s coming next: continuing to use this space as one of learning, activism, and connection.Thank you for being part of our first year. We’re just getting started!If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we dive into the pressures of modern romance—like pickup lines, “the spark,” and all the ways we’re told it’s supposed to go. Spoiler alert: these expectations usually lead to awkward moments, not magical connections.We talk about why being yourself (instead of relying on memorized lines) is way more effective, and why respecting each other’s intentions—whether you’re looking for something casual or long-term—is so important. For most, authenticity over performance wins every time.Next, we unpack the spark—what it really means, why it’s often overrated, and how emotional and intellectual compatibility can be more important than initial attraction. We also dig into how past relationships can shape our present ones—and why it’s more important to like the person you're with than to chase after that initial rush.In the end, we remind ourselves—and our listeners—that real connections don’t need a script. No grand gestures, no perfect pickup lines—just authentic, respectful interactions. It’s about being true to yourself and letting things unfold naturally.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we’re digging into the world of digital intimidation — sextortion, deepfakes, and the non-consensual sharing of intimate content — and the sexual shame that allows these threats to take hold. We each share our own encounters with sextortion attempts and unpack how these messages are crafted to provoke panic, silence, and self-blame. The tech may be newer, but the tactic is familiar: it leverages the shame we’ve been conditioned to fear.We talk about how sexual curiosity and watching porn are still treated as something illicit, and how that judgment becomes the leverage behind digital coercion. We explore why the term “revenge porn” misses the point, what the new Take It Down Act means, and how deepfakes are creating a new layer of harm and confusion around consent and credibility. Throughout our conversation, we rebuke the idea that victims are responsible for what was done to them and highlight the importance of digital literacy and open, shame-free dialogue.At its core, this episode is about understanding how digital threats work and rejecting the shame they depend on. If you’ve ever felt fear around your digital footprint or worried about intimate content online, this conversation offers clarity, compassion, and a reminder that your sexuality isn’t the problem — the stigma is.If you received a sextortion email you can report it to the Federal Trade CommissionIf you need help getting out of a controlling relationship, you can visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline. You’ll find information on their page for how to chat, text or call if you need help. If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we had the honor of welcoming our friend and longtime listener, Timothy — a non-binary, queer human from rural Appalachia — for a deeply personal conversation about identity, belonging, and courage.They share what it was like to grow up in a small, deeply religious community where conversations about sex and queerness were kept behind closed doors, if they happened at all. From the confusion of realizing there were no visible examples of people like them to learning how to “blend in” for safety, their story paints an honest picture of what it means to navigate identity in isolation.We talk about the quiet survival skills queer kids develop — code-switching between accents, words, and worlds — and the constant calculation of how safe it is to show up authentically. Those early experiences have since shaped their work in academia, where they now advocate for inclusive spaces through small but powerful gestures of respect, like using preferred names.It’s a conversation that reminds us acceptance isn’t just an urban story — it’s one that needs to echo through every valley, every house of worship, and every family table.Whether you’re a parent, guardian, aunt, uncle, or chosen family, supporting a queer young person starts with connection and knowledge. Here are some trusted resources to help you learn, listen, and show up with love:PFLAG - ResourcesThe Trevor Project - ResourcesGLSEN - Resources  If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this episode, we’re unzipping the wild, confusing, and often misunderstood world of the adolescent brain — and what that can mean for risk-taking and decision-making between the ages of 13 and 25.Dr. Sue shares what decades of teaching teens, college students, and future educators have revealed about how young people actually think about risk, pressure, and identity. (Spoiler: they are thinking — just with a brain that’s wired differently than an adult’s.)We dig into why peers matter so much, why “bad decisions” often make developmental sense, and why adults tend to forget what it felt like to be in that stage themselves. We also unzip the mixed messages baked into our laws — from the variation in consent laws, driving at 16, joining the military at 18, renting a car at 25 — and how they fail to reflect what we now know about the developing brain.This episode is all about compassion, clarity, and cutting through the judgment. Adolescence is messy. It’s emotional. It’s confusing. And it’s a phase every single one of us survived — even if we’ve conveniently romanticized our way out of remembering how chaotic it really was.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

This week on Unzipping Taboos, we unzip the myths around the so-called “sexual revolution.” When one hears “sexual revolution” they tend to picture flower crowns, free love, and a big cultural exhale—but underneath all that was a much deeper fight for bodily autonomy, women’s rights, and freedom from patriarchal control.Our conversation explores how the 1960s and 70s reshaped everything from access to birth control to who could open a credit card—and how, decades later, those same battles are still being fought in new forms. We unzip how power shows up in the way we talk about sex: who’s allowed to speak, who gets blamed, and how “morality” is often used to police women and marginalized groups.We examine how controlling the story means controlling the truth—from how data on maternal health and STIs gets reported (or not reported) to the way headlines frame social change as “moral decline.” The result? A fascinating look at how progress and backlash are intertwined—and why allyship, curiosity, and critical thinking matter now more than ever.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

“Stranger danger” has long been the go-to phrase for teaching kids about safety—but it’s outdated and misleading in many ways. In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we talk about what really protects children—teaching them consent, trust, and situational awareness.We talk about why giving children the correct names for their anatomy matters, how to create space for curiosity without shame, and what it looks like to empower kids with confidence rather than fear. Just as importantly, we explore how danger isn’t always about faceless strangers, but can come from people children know — which makes it even more critical that adults listen to kids when they say something feels off.At the heart of this conversation is a shift from fear-based warnings to respect-based trust. Because when we empower kids to name their bodies, trust their instincts, and know they’ll be believed, we’re doing more than keeping them safe — we’re teaching them that their boundaries and voices matter.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

In this post-election episode, we take a breath—and a moment to celebrate. After the November elections, we found ourselves feeling something we hadn’t in a while: optimism. In this episode, we talk about what it means to hold onto that feeling and how to turn it into action.We talk about the power of showing up and how to move from celebration to sustained action.  From reproductive rights to education, equality, and justice, we explore how real progress depends on everyday engagement, not just election cycles. Highlighting that inclusive education and community care, and everyday actions—big and small—can shift the conversation and create lasting change.Hope isn’t passive—it’s a practice. And keeping it alive means continuing to question, challenge, and participate in shaping the world we want to live in.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

Not every parent or guardian has a Dr. Sue in their back pocket when questions about sex or sex health. And yet, kids are curious, their questions are valid, and the way adults respond can shape how they understand bodies, consent, and relationships for years to come.In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we call in both compassion and responsibility: What does it mean to give children honest, age-appropriate answers without shame? How do we dismantle outdated, fear-based approaches and replace them with respect, trust, and curiosity? We explore how parents or caregivers can step into the role of safe, trusted guides—even if they never got this kind of guidance themselves.We also share practical tools and resources—like amaze.org and state-by-state curriculum guides—to help parents prepare for conversations that may happen anywhere, anytime: at the dinner table, in the car, or while watching TV together. At the heart of it all, we emphasize honesty, boundaries, and respect—because kids don’t just need facts, they need adults willing to listen and talk without shame.To find out how your state scores on sex education, check out the SIECUS State Profiles If you want to see an overview for the requirements for sex education for your state, including requirements for parental notification check out Guttmacher’s State Laws and PoliciesFor resources for parents/caregivers to learn how to talk to kids about sex, check out amaze’s websiteIf you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

We’ve all seen it on TV, in movies or porn: two people lock eyes, clothes fly off, and somehow it’s perfect. But here’s the truth—spontaneous sex might make for great entertainment, yet for most people (especially in long-term relationships), it’s not the everyday reality.In this episode, we unzip the myth of spontaneous sex and explore the very real, very valid world of responsive desire—the kind that grows with connection, communication, and consent. We talk about how media and porn often set impossible expectations for instant passion, why those narratives can leave couples feeling “less than,” and how planned intimacy can be just as sexy—sometimes even more so—than in-the-moment encounters.We share our thoughts on building emotional closeness, practicing empathy, and navigating changing sexual dynamics over time. The takeaway? Great sex isn’t about chasing camera-worthy moments—it’s about intention, understanding, and choosing each other, over and over again.If you want to read more about different levels of arousal, check out the article that we talk about in the show: Giddy articleIf you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions

In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we dive into the intersection of respect, chivalry, and consent in our everyday interactions. We unpack how cultural expectations shape our understanding of respect, particularly through common gestures like holding doors open and using titles like "ma'am". We discuss the importance of honoring individual preferences when addressing others and explore how actions rooted in chivalry, while often intended as acts of kindness, can perpetuate power dynamics if they lack true mutual respect and consent.Our conversation examines the delicate balance between chivalry and genuine respect, highlighting how even polite actions can sometimes be tied to outdated gender norms or cultural expectations. As we continue to challenge these norms, we emphasize the need for mutual understanding and communication in all interactions. Ultimately, it’s about respecting personal boundaries, preferences, and choices—no matter how big or small the gesture, and no matter who the gesture is directed towards.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

Stealthing—it sounds like something out of a spy movie, but in reality, it’s a serious violation of consent. In this episode, we unzip what stealthing really is: when someone removes a condom during sex without their partner’s knowledge or consent. It’s a practice that crosses every ethical line, yet it’s still only legally recognized as sexual assault in one state (California).Together with our guest Dr. Jenn Evans, we dig into the legal gaps, the cultural double standards around contraception, and the toxic influence of “red pill” ideology that excuses men’s harmful actions while blaming women. We talk about the human impact—how stealthing robs people of their bodily autonomy—and why shifting societal attitudes about consent is as important as changing the laws.This conversation also shines a light on broader gendered expectations: why women are still blamed for pregnancies despite using contraception, why men’s reproductive sabotage is minimized, and how harmful online communities groom young men into entitlement and misogyny.At the heart of it all, this episode is about consent, power, and respect. Because no matter what the law says, removing someone’s choice is never okay.If you or someone you know has experienced stealthing or any form of sexual assault, you are not alone—and support is available. You can reach out to RAINN’s National Sexual Assault Hotline. They’re available by chat and phone 24/7.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

From Love Island to The Bachelor to Are You My First?, these types of reality shows turn love and sex into a competition. But what does that say about how we see relationships—and ourselves?In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we dive into the “gamification” of sex and relationships on reality TV. We unpack how these shows reinforce harmful beauty standards, perpetuate rigid gender roles, and normalize manipulation—all while being marketed as romance. We also explore the hypocrisy of a culture that politicizes marriage for some while turning it into a ratings game for others.At the same time, we talk about what responsible viewing can look like: understanding media literacy, treating contestants as human beings (not villains), and remembering that real relationships don’t look like staged drama on a tropical island. Whether you watch these shows for fun, critique, or guilty pleasure, this conversation unzips what it means to be a thoughtful consumer of relationship “entertainment.”If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

Why do people cheat? In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we unzip the messy realities of infidelity. From unmet needs and boredom to revenge, immaturity, or even unresolved trauma, we unpack the many reasons someone might stray — including situations where cheating happens despite a seemingly “happy” relationship.We also distinguish between cheating and consensual non-monogamy, explore the lasting impact on relationships, and ask what it really takes to heal if a couple chooses to stay together. Because at the end of the day, working through the “why” and the “what now” of infidelity comes down to communication, honesty, and self-awareness.Whether you’ve been cheated on, have cheated yourself, or just want to better understand the psychology behind it, this candid conversation shines a light on one of the most painful and misunderstood experiences in relationships.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

In this episode of Unzipping Taboos, we unzip the tangled narratives around birth control, emergency contraception, and abortion. Too often, political headlines and misinformation blur these terms together — leaving people confused, misinformed, or even shamed for making decisions about their own bodies.We break down the difference between preventing pregnancy and ending one, highlighting how methods like the pill, IUDs, and emergency contraception actually work — and how political rhetoric blurs those lines to push an agenda. We talk about why it matters that we get the science and terminology right, and we question why those who claim to be “pro-life” often fight against the very tools that prevent unplanned pregnancies like comprehensive sex ed and accessible contraception. Together, we call out the dangerous conflation of birth control and abortion, and emphasize the importance of accurate sex ed, and the importance of accountability from policymakers.If you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestionsIf you want to ask Dr Sue a sex question for the weekly Q&A you can submit it here: Ask a question

“U.S. fertility rate hits an all-time low — less than 1.6 kids per woman…”  Sounds like an emergency that women are solely responsible for, right? Not so fast.In this episode, we unzip the nuance behind those sensationalist headlines, breaking down the difference between infertility and national fertility rates — ahem, birth rates — and why conflating the two isn’t just misleading, it’s harmful for everyone.We explore how the media often pins declining birth rates on women, while ignoring the real drivers behind reproductive decisions: restrictive laws, lack of parental leave, unaffordable childcare, rising maternal mortality, and — let’s be real — the fact that some people just don’t want kids And that’s valid.Join us as we unzip what a headline about “fertility rate” really means — and why it’s time to stop blaming women for a trend that reflects a much bigger, more complex pictureIf you have a story, thoughts and/or a topic or question for Dr. Sue and Charlie please share your ideas here:  ⁠Show suggestions