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© 2026 INSTANT EXPERTS - the latest news, explained by idiots
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A comedy podcast featuring all the week's news - explained by idiots.
Hosted by The Honk & Henry Lee -- it's the stuff you wanna know, from guys who don't know it. The final insult? They're Australian.
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54 Episodes
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Send us a text here! Video version is here!: https://youtu.be/b6XbBM3Wgug In our latest tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: It’s week 2 of the AFL, the NRL and the big clash between IRAN and USA! Will America’s league-leading offence beat Iran’s league-leading defence? We mine the Straits of Hormuz to find out!Will Ukraine’s expertise repelling Russian drones made by Iran funded by America help America repel Iranian drones funded by Russia? And will the new new Ayatollah sur...
Send us a text here! To watch the video version on YouTube: https://youtu.be/Vxx9PQP2LqY In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits & Morons: After 249 gruelling days of no-one bombing the sh*t out of each other, Israel, Iran and The US are ready for MIDDLE EAST ELIMINATION CHAMBER - the WWE/WW3 co-production everyone's talking about! It’s Mania in Mesopotamia as the Tigris and Euphrates square off at last! Who’s the greatest river of them all? Shatt Al-Arab reports! Can *an...
Send us a text here! Video version of episode here!: https://youtu.be/G3d7tFVI5Nc It’s State of the Union time and the Crooks, F***wits and Morons are winning more than ever! United States Supreme Court rules President Trump’s 15% tariff on IQ Tests illegal! He’s stuck on 85 - or was that 58? - and needs urgent tuition from WhatsApp maths guru Henry Li!Honk and Henry wade through more Epstein Files only to find key interviews with Trump accuser missing! If that’s not exoneration, we don’...
Send us a text here! It’s the FIRST EVER VIDEO EDITION OF INSTANT EXPERTS! And like us, more Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons have revealed themselves! Ex-Prince Andrew swaps underage girls for well-endowed cellmates! Now we know why it’s called “His Majesty’s Prison”!President Gerald Ford makes a shock return to US foreign policy! Watch out Iran - there’s nothing more dangerous than a dead man with guns!The Epstein Files end more careers. Including that of The DoJ’s Chief Redacter, who XXXXX Trum...
Send us a text here! It’s Season 2 of Instant Experts and, like us, the Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons have gone next-level: Trump successfully takes over Venezuela - a mysterious land of high-quality coke and low-quality oil!Trump unsuccessfully takes over Greenland and Minnesota - mysterious lands of fire, ICE and getting shot in the face! Canada PM Mark Carney dumps Trump; In Aussie politics, The Nats dump The Libs; Trump dumps Norwegian PM Orm Bjorn Ulfurhydrodin; and hot Norwegian WAG ...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Stupid F***ing Terrorist C**ts murder 15 people at Bondi Beach.Aussie leaders experience brain, backbone shortage. It’s an Islamic Terrorism problem, stupid!Henry stands up to 'Stand Up To Hate' campaign by hating f***ing terrorist c**ts. Standing up.Did we mention Australia has an Islamist Terrorism problem? Sorry Allegra, we do. Because they’re f***wits who want to kill Jews and destroy western civilisation...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: The Honk returns from London, needs 10 days to recover!: "One was tired!" US Def Sec Pete Hegseth shoots two defenceless feet dead in open ocean: “I thought my legs were armed, your Honour!”ICE rounds up more Black Admirals, Generals: "Zey Ver Owr Orderz!"World's worst team Wests Tigers finds 50 more ways to lose their fans, matches, lovers Plus so much more from the worst week ever (until Sun Dec...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Mark Epstein: Trump never blew Clinton - "Certainly not Bill anyway".Epstein discharge petition scrapes through House 218-217, but Transparency Bill 427-1. Who the fuck votes Yes AND No, people?!!!US Def Sec Pete Hegseth defends new 'OPERATION GAYLORD': "It's the first name of the great Major Boner of Fort Dick's, you ignoramuses! He was a hard man!!”Mark Epstein clarifies: Trump never blew *any* Clinton - "B...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Epstein Files release vote goes to Congress: “It’ll be the first bill we’ve read in years!”Trump prepares Epstein defence: “I asked for 18 but Jeff gave me 20% off!”2020 Stolen Election hoaxsters are pardoned: “We just can’t fucking count, ok?”President Thomas Jefferson strongly denies slave mistress/kids slur in brave new memoir “Brown Sugar (How Come You Taste So Good?)”Plus, Democrats enlist Survivor legen...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Not Since O.J.!: Trump hit by legal shit sandwich as DC Sando-Terrorist walks free in shock loss of Trial of the Millenium - But if the sub don’t hit, you must acquit!How Could NY Elect a 34yo Who Never Molested, Defrauded Anyone?!: Patience, people!Trump ices trade deal with China: “How you like that one, Soy Boy?!”Hardman Xi : “Frankly Don, I thought it'd be bigger!Oasis Cowers At The Tower!: The Towering M...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits & Morons: Australia unleashes world’s smallest controversy as PM backs morbid New Wave over Punk, Glam & anthemic Britpop. No Oasis tix for you sir!Trump admits White House rebuild fail: "Movers lost The Epstein Files!"Lily Allen follow up album "David You're Still a C*nt" out next week!; andOn the Barrier Reef, like in the Marines, no-one gets left behind. Except the sick, the weak and the old! Suck it, Grandma!...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Mr Albo goes to Washington!: “Nice place, but who's the old coot in The White House?”The AUKUS alliance lives!: Aussie cat burglars secretly rob The Louvre to fund new old US subs. Picked up a few grouse sketches as well!Trump flip-flops on Ukraine AGAIN: “I dunno. Vlod, Vlad, it’s all so confusing!”; and “WWE Rare Earth” superstars Neodymium, Dysprosium, Terbium, Samarium dig deep in unmissable tag-team...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Did Trump do good in Gaza? And if so, was it deliberate? The Honk & Henry Lee analyse Israel / Palestine - incorrectly!When a bee falls in the forest, is it agony or ecstasy? The Aussie Senate reports!Henry Lee in Bali! - ICE notified, Torpedos for 'Drug Boats' diverted his wayAnd in sport, The Honk onscreen at WWE Crown Jewel! Can he escape champ Stephanie Vaquer's thighs? What if he doesn't want to? Al...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: WTF?! Trump says Middle East at peace but the Midwest a Warzone!Pam Bondi treats the Constitution like Kristi Noem treats dogs - with a bullet in the brain!US Government shutdown continues! - Except for steroid-addled Masked Childcatchers keeping the streets safe from priests, fry cooks and gardenersAnd in sport, Brisbane Broncos beat the cast of Rent in a thriller! - Wests Tigers sacks Rent director immediat...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: DefSec Hegseth cracks down!A Gubernatorial candidate steps down!Hamas might back down!As The Honk preps for WWE's Perth smackdown!Also in this week's Ep of Australia’s 47th favourite comedy podcast: Cheating drunk Pete Hegseth gives professionalism lecture to 800 officers who outrank himHegseth's draftdodging paedo boss stunned same 800 officers don't like him Jiz Lee, Jizz Fashion fight for the heart, p...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: 1. Trump links Tylenol to autism - Doctors link RFK Jr to aneurism 2. Trump assures all United Nations: “ICE has a jailcell for every Wetback here!” 3. Border Czar Tom Homan rounds up $50,000 and detains it in his pocket 4. And, Henry enjoys The Middle Age Payrise for one glorious minute Plus so much ...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: President congratulates Jimmy Kimmel on 22 hit years - "Guards, seize him!!"FBI Boss Kash Patel can't find own arse - "Right after I got it handed to me by Congress, too!"Robert Redford's passing met with outpour of grief, fluids - "Gee his acting hit my spot!" says every woman born between 1935 and 2007Plus more of the worst week in world history since last week: FBI cyber expert William Shakespeare ce...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Stroke victim, stroke lover Donald J Trump denies signing Epstein Birthday Book - “It must've been the Autopen!”Charlie Kirk shot dead in Utah - Second Amendment 1, First Amendment 0Russia downplays sending drones into Poland - "When have we EVER invaded Poland, apart from 981, 1013, 1017, 1018, 1022, 1030-31, 1065-69, 1076-77, 1092, 1120-1125, 1142-3, 1163, 1182-83, 1192, 1507-8, 1512-1522, 1534-1537, 1561-1...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Chairman Dan defends Beijing trip - “It’s in the national interest! Of China"Rep Marjorie Taylor Greene tries flattery to get Files released - "Every American wants to read your biography, Mr President" Trump scotches rumours - "I'm only dead on the inside"And in sport Henry magically halves winnings at Morning Star Hotel!Plus so much more of the week's hellscape: Ex NSW Premier Bob Carr defends ow...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Taylor & Travis: So Happy! - Every other longtime BF on earth: so f*cked!Aussie PM boots Iran Ambassador over local terror attacks - 'I knew he was trouble when he walked in!'Anti-Hero Vice Prostate BJ Vance tells Ukraine, Crimea - 'You are never ever getting back together!' Plus, a Cruel Summer for Wests Tigers fans as team bombs finals chances again - 'We remember this all too well!' &...
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