None of My Business

When planning group sex, don’t forget the snacks. This week, Sophia and Kelsey are welcoming a very special guest: our producer, Justin Sayles! He gives us a glimpse at life behind the scenes of NOMB before reading as Natalie*, a free spirit who loves the single life and has never had her heart broken. She shares stories about dating men in open relationships, getting the ick from driving barefoot, and one fully clothed guy at a sex party. Tune in for a wild one! *Not Natalie’s real name, but definitely her real stories. Today’s episode includes … 00:25: Our guest: Justin Sayles02:24: Debriefing with your partner about everyone’s business07:54: Our business: “Natalie”13:11: First Things First: “She’s a home-wrecker”17:20: Worst Ex: “Can I disarm?”26:55: Best I Ever Had: “I have five married boyfriends”37:04: Three’s Company: “Are you ready to eat pussy?”43:34: Crazy Train: “A spontaneous gang bang”58:27: Fuck-It List: “I just say things, and they seem to happen” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Justin SaylesSupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠. CONNECTInstagram: http://⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod TikTok: http://⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod Sophia's Twitter: http://⁠x.com/1followernodad Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠Kelsey's TikTok: http://⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen Kelsey's Instagram: http://⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is it ever a good idea to tell your partner you're no longer attracted to them? This week, Sophia and Kelsey are joined by the hilarious Kevin T. Porter, host of the podcast ‘Good Christian Fun’ and proud owner of a middle initial. He’ll be reading as Haven*, who, upon leaving a religious cult, was ready to explore sex without restrictions. Listen up to hear stories about Harry Potter fanfic, dripping wax, and experimenting with your best friend. *Not Haven’s real name, but definitely her real stories Today’s episode includes … 00:25: Our guest: Kevin T. Porter 01:23: Hearing juicy gossip in church 14:39: Our business: “Haven” 18:22: First Things First: “We met in Bible college” 24:04: First Comes Marriage: “Sometimes things end” 47:37: The One Who Got Away: “We’d need to get married immediately” 50:17: Worst Ex: “11:55 p.m. on New Year’s Eve” 57:08: Best I Ever Had: “I just explored myself so much” 1:04:57: Fuck-It List: “Choking on a dildo” 1:11:02: Status Update: “We have found our groove” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Kevin on IG and X! https://www.instagram.com/kevintporter/ https://x.com/KevinTPorter Listen to Kevin’s podcast, ‘Good Christian Fun’ https://open.spotify.com/show/43wOhCblFrUFHTyRb089AJ Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen Guest: Kevin T. Porter Supervising producer: Justin Sayles Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle Video editing and production: Kayla Talley Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris Motion design: Skull Closet Studio Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠. CONNECT Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod ⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod ⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad ⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠ Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen ⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What happens when your spouse suddenly loses interest in sex? This week, the hilarious Brett Dodenhoff, cohost of the new podcast ‘Lust to Dust: My Horny Dead Dad,’ joins Sophia and Kelsey to talk about his late father’s sex memoir. He then reads as Frank*, a 58-year-old doctor who we can confidently diagnose as a wife guy. Listen in to hear his tales of horny orchestra students, sex after stitches, and encountering midlife asexuality. *Not Frank’s real name, but definitely his real stories Today’s episode includes … 00:26: Our guest: Brett Dodenhoff 07:13: The ineffective no-hookup rule 12:40: Our business: “Frank” 14:49: First Things First: “The violinist came on to me” 21:08: The One Who Got Away: “A fabulous, tumultuous month” 27:43: Cheater, Cheater: “The sex started disappearing” 42:50: Best I Ever Had: “I just about died” 46:09: Status Update: “Remember our old lives?” 54:47: Fuck-It List: “The embarrassed guy in the threesome” 57:49: Parting Shots: “It would open things up for me” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Brett on TikTok, IG, YouTube! https://www.tiktok.com/@brettthelorax?lang=en https://www.instagram.com/brettthelorax/ https://www.youtube.com/@Brett.Dodenhoff Listen Brett’s podcast, ‘Lust to Dust: My Horny Dead Dad’ https://open.spotify.com/show/5RpohVgue0LFE11mXioDr7 Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen Guest: Brett Dodenhoff Supervising producer: Justin Sayles Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle Video editing and production: Kayla Talley Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris Motion design: Skull Closet Studio Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠. CONNECT Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod ⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod ⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad ⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠ Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen ⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It’s time to enter the sex dungeon. This week, Sophia and Kelsey are joined by the amazing Annapurna Sriram: writer, director, and star of the new movie ‘Fucktoys’! She offers her insight as a trained dominatrix as she reads as Kyra*, an adventurous Jesus camp alum who’s a cunnilingus expert and has hooked up with celebs. Get ready to be serenaded by a pan flute and tune in. *Not Kyra’s real name, but definitely her real stories. Today’s episode includes … 00:25: Our guest: Annapurna Sriram 08:22: The eroticism of Irish dance 15:15: Our business: “Kyra” 18:16: First Things First: “Vaginas are intimidating” 25:16: Cheater, Cheater: “He was scrambling and lying” 51:06: The One Who Got Away: “I’ve seen a lot of dicks” 54:55: Fuck-It List: “Big Luke and Little Luke” 59:05: Best I Ever Had: “He still has my underwear” 1:07:19: Status Update: “We ran out of condoms” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Annapurna and ‘Fucktoys’ on IG! https://www.instagram.com/missannapurna/ https://www.instagram.com/fucktoysthemovie/ Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen Guest: Annapurna Sriram Supervising producer: Justin Sayles Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle Video editing and production: Kayla Talley Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris Motion design: Skull Closet Studio Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠. CONNECT Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod ⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod ⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad ⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠ Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen ⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"The Roster" With Sydney Kane In which we learn about the world of “dollification.” It’s the last week of Freaky February, and Sophia and Kelsey are joined by the great Sydney Kane: actor, singer, and creator of the musical comedy special ‘Wife Material.’ Sydney will be reading as Stella*, a 44-year-old research queen with an impressively organized sex life (complete with incredible nicknames for all her regular hookups). Tune in to hear tales of red rooms and iPad cheating from this hilarious sexpert. *Not Stella’s real name, but definitely her real stories Today’s episode includes … 00:18: Our guest: Sydney Kane00:41: The woes of situationships18:33: Our business: “Stella”21:35: First Things First: “Varsity-level stuff”25:12: Best I Ever Had: “Country Boy Toy”32:18: Worst Ex: “I was dick-matized”41:28: The One Who Got Away: “He matched my freak”51:17: Places and Spaces: “We met between acts”52:52: Red Flags: “It almost felt performative”54:48: Circling Back: “He went to Sephora”59:58: Status Update: “Monetize my horniness” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at ⁠noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com⁠. Follow Sydney on IG and TikTok! ⁠https://www.instagram.com/sydneymorgankane/⁠ ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@sydneymorgankane⁠ Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Sydney KaneSupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠⁠⁠⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠⁠⁠⁠. CONNECTInstagram: ⁠⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod⁠ ⁠TikTok: ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod⁠ ⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠⁠x.com/1followernodad⁠ ⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠⁠⁠⁠Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen⁠ ⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We’re heading to the horniest department store in town. It’s another edition of Freaky February, and Sophia and Kelsey are joined by the hilarious actor and comedian Avery McClure! Avery will be reading as Christy*, a 45-year-old mom whose stories include diapers, peacocks, and hooking up with coworkers (and their brothers). Find a comfy hay bale and tune in to a fun one. *Not Christy’s real name, but definitely her real stories. Today’s episode includes … 00:21: Our guest: Avery McClure 01:30: Being in love with your friends 13:19: Our business: “Christy” 16:05: First Things First: “Finally!” 18:40: Best I Ever Had: ”An unexpected threesome” 23:00: Worst Ex: “My other girlfriend” 30:39: The One Who Got Away: “He lived by a zoo” 36:24: Craziest Sex: “We called him Hot Jack” 38:57: Deal-Breakers: “He started talking baby talk” 43:25: Worst First Date: “Luckily, we drove two cars” 47:25: Do It Again?: “She looked like Baby Spice” 51:37: Fuck-It List: “I’m terrified” 54:36: Status Update: “He just washed my car” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Avery on IG and TikTok! https://www.instagram.com/averymcclure0 https://www.tiktok.com/@averymcclure0 Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen Guest: Avery McClure Supervising producer: Justin Sayles Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle Video editing and production: Kayla Talley Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris Motion design: Skull Closet Studio Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠. CONNECT Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod ⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod ⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad ⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠ Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen ⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Genuine question: Can you invite people to an orgy on Partiful?Freaky February continues with the great actor and comedian Mackinlee Waddell, who tells Sophia and Kelsey about her experience getting divorced before role-playing as Briauna.* Jump in to hear juicy stories about hookups in Iceland, surprise fisting, and finding your partner’s Bumble account.*Briauna is not her real name, but these are definitely her real stories. (And yes, the spelling is discussed.)Today’s episode includes …00:23: Our guest: Mackinlee Waddell00:39: Mackinlee opens up about her divorce17:05: Our business: “Briauna”21:08: Best I Ever Had: “I didn’t know I could do that”28:36: Worst Ex: ”This kid called me ‘stepmom’”36:15: The One Who Got Away: “It had to come to an end”42:52: Deal-Breakers: “Your brain is still forming”46:59: Never Again: “That was a little much”51:33: This One Time When…: “He went off the deep end”56:01: Status Update: “We’re gonna make it exclusive”If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com.Follow Mackinlee on IG!https://www.instagram.com/mackinleewHosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Mackinlee WaddellSupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.CONNECTInstagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When the pussy so good he adjusted his whole moral compass… The hilarious Tamara Yajia, author of ‘Cry For Me, Argentina: My Life as a Failed Child Star,’ has returned for Freaky February, in which Sophia and Kelsey are switching places! Tam will be reading as Catherine*, who tells us about her torrid romances involving Holy Thursday sex, LARPing, and a whole lot of fringe. *As always, Catherine is not her real name, but these are definitely her real stories Today’s episode includes … 00:22 Our guest: Tamara Yajia08:02: Welcome to Freaky February!10:13: Our business: “Catherine”13:36: First Things First: “I can’t die a virgin”35:18: Best I Ever Had: ”The chemistry was 11/10”44:12: Worst Ex: “He stole my entire friend group”49:52: The One Who Got Away: “Everything comes back to my high school ex”54:27: Cheater, Cheater: “Complete brain memory wipe”1:00:36: Worst First Date: “Mario Kart–type racing”1:06:37: Status Update: “Did a little witchy spell” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Tam on IG!https://www.instagram.com/tamarayajia Buy Tam’s book, ‘Cry For Me, Argentina: My Life as a Failed Child Star’https://a.co/d/7bHd9LJ Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Tamara YajiaSupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠. CONNECTInstagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A dispatch from the college dorm’s lesbian floor. This week, Sophia and Kelsey welcome the hilarious comedian Skyler Higley, a writer for the Oscars and Kelsey’s former high school classmate! He’ll be reading as Mira*, a cool Los Angeleno with endless charisma (and zingers). Tune in to hear a fun one about an unfortunate-smelling roommate, doing homework for a crush, and a sexual encounter on a pile of coats. (*Not Mira’s real name, but definitely her real stories.) Today’s episode includes … 00:27: Our guest: Skyler Higley08:42: The perils of cuddling19:49: Our business: “Mira”25:44: First Things First: “She was very … weathered”33:51: Worst Ex: “It was such a dumbass reaction”1:00:22 The One Who Got Away: “I was feeling so swaggy”1:05:12: Six-and-a-Half-Year Relationship: “We had no shame”1:13:40: Best I Ever Had: “A lot of public sex”1:19:01: Status Update: “She might be with gym girl right now” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Skyler on IG and X!https://www.instagram.com/skylerhigley/https://x.com/skyler_higley?lang=en Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Skyler HigleySupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris Calleton Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠. CONNECTInstagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.podTikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.podSophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodadSophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensenKelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In which we analyze the psychological appeal of secret sex. This week, Sophia and Kelsey introduce us to the very endearing (and very horny) Mason*, a sweet San Diegan who’s open to just about anything. Reading as Mason is the great Holly Solem: ‘Playgirl’ columnist, host of Manthropology TV, and author of HollyWould. Jump in to hear Mason tell us about his ex’s controlling family, a thorny love triangle, and sex solicitations on the Whisper app. *Not Mason’s real name, but definitely his real stories. Today’s episode includes … 00:00: Some R&R gone wrong at the bar 07:16: Our guest: Holly Solem 15:41: Our business: “Mason” 17:55: First Things First: “The nice Christian girl wasn't as horny as I was” 24:12: Worst Ex: “She was fiery and exciting” 35:59: One Who Got Away: “We were both obsessed with the idea of non-monogamy" 51:01: Craziest Sex Stories: “I slept with as many people in San Diego as I could" 59:52: Best I Ever Had: “I'm a bottom" 1:01:48: Wife Guy: "I was really into moms" 1:06:22: Status Update: “About 98 percent monogamous” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Holly’s accounts on IG! http://instagram.com/hollymsolem http://instagram.com/manthropologytv Check out her substack HollyWould! https://hollywould.substack.com Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen Guest: Holly Solem Supervising Producer: Justin Sayles Additional Production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle Video Editing and Production: Kayla Talley Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle Art Direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris Motion Design: Skull Closet Studio Additional Motion Design Support: Chris Calleton Theme Song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠. CONNECT Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod⁠ TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod⁠ Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad⁠ Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠ Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen⁠ Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You’ll never look at Monster Energy cans the same way. Get ready to meet Kennedy*, an L.A. gal with strong feelings on length vs. girth. And reading as Kennedy will be the incomparable Jodi Walker, host of We’re Obsessed on the Ringer Podcast Network. Join Jodi, Sophia, and Kelsey as they explore Kennedy’s wild tales about stagnant water, penis pumps, and one guy’s little-too-comfortable relationship with his stepsister. (*As always, not her real name, but for sure her real stories.) Today’s episode includes … 00:00: How tall is too tall? Asking for a friend. 06:09: Our guest: Jodi Walker 11:05: Our business: “Kennedy” 17:26: First Things First: “Kinda entered a blue-balls zone” 25:34: Worst Ex: “I love everything about you except the way you look” 36:31: One Who Got Away: “Super short corduroy shorts” 46:39: Craziest Sex Stories: “Too annoying for a threesome” 57:38: Best I Ever Had: “Stagnant water” 1:16:10: Status Update: “So I’ve taken a step back” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Listen to Jodi on We’re Obsessed! open.spotify.com/show/6gYfWwK7c6RO0l9T0W7BMk?si=2a8cd5e20fe34902 Follow her on IG! instagram.com/jodi_e_walker Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen Guest: Jodi Walker Supervising producer: Justin Sayles Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle Video editing and production: Kayla Talley Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris Motion design: Skull Closet Studio Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠. CONNECT Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod⁠ TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod⁠ Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad⁠ Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠ Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen⁠ Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Surprise group sex! The Torture Garden! A sweet man at the center of it all! This week, we’ll meet Oliver*, a 50-year-old bloke from London with a fun past and hopefully fun future ahead of him. And reading as Oliver will be The Ringer’s Nora Princiotti, cohost of We’re Obsessed and Every Single Album. So cuff yourself to your chair and stay tuned, because it’s a fun one. (*Not Oliver’s real name, but definitely his real stories.) Today’s story includes … 00:00: The trouble with opening lines.05:41: Our guest: Nora Princiotti12:18: Our business: “Oliver”15:58: First Things First: “Ridiculous screwball comedy stuff.”20:53: Worst Ex: “The worst ex is my most recent ex.”35:10: Cheater Cheater: “I found messages between the two of them.”46:51: Breaking Up Is Hard to Do: “I thought from the beginning: This is a terrible idea.”55:36: Craziest Hookup: “I had an accidental foursome.”1:17:12: Status Update: “It’s going to be the first time I’ve lived on my own in 25 years.” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Nora on Instagram!instagram.com/noraprinciotti Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Nora PrinciottiSupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from http://premiumbeat.com. CONNECTInstagram: instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.podTikTok: tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.podSophia's Twitter: x.com/1followernodadSophia's Instagram: instagram.com/sgbenoitKelsey's TikTok: tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensenKelsey's Instagram: instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Pick yourself up from the living room floor and lock in, because we’ve got a fun one involving Craigslist Missed Connections, BDSM, and some jaw-droppingly terrible exes. Today, Sophia and Kelsey welcome one of our favorite comedians and noted wife guy Josh Gondelman to the middle chair. Josh is reading as Nina*: a Brooklyn gal who introduced us to the idea of gang-bang concierges and the phrase “surprise pregnant.” It’s a good one, so tune in. (*Not Nina’s real name, but—as always—her very real stories.) Today’s episode includes … 00:00: Sharing dogs with exes 06:17: Our guest: Josh Gondelman 11:03: Our business: “Nina” 13:44: First Things First: “There was a guy leaning against a wall” 17:55: Worst Ex: “It destroyed my conception of the universe” 28:57: It Gets Worse: “We met as a mutual Missed Connection on Craigslist” 46:26: Best I Ever Had: “Kind of BDSM-adjacent” 49:18: Status Update: “I no longer try to prevent pregnancy” 55:02: Group Activities: “He really liked connecting people” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Josh on Instagram! instagram.com/joshgondelman Watch Josh’s stand-up special here! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAvNlgpdKKo Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen Guest: Josh Gondelman Supervising producer: Justin Sayles Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle Video editing and production: Kayla Talley Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris Motion design: Skull Closet Studio Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from http://premiumbeat.com. CONNECT Instagram: instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod TikTok: tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod Sophia's Twitter: x.com/1followernodad Sophia's Instagram: instagram.com/sgbenoit Kelsey's TikTok: tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen Kelsey's Instagram: instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dirty talk, the right way. This week, we’re joined by the illustrious Charles Holmes, veteran of many Ringer podcasts as well as of the L.A. dating scene. And Charles is reading as Pippa*, a fun gal from London with some fun stories. On the docket is an affair with a bandmate, the real key to sexy bedroom talk, and some wild icks that, when you think about it, make a ton of sense. (*Not her real name, but as always, her real stories.) This week’s episode includes … 00:00: Kelsey’s Raya adventures 03:56: Our guest: Charles Holmes 05:18: Our business: “Pippa” 08:43: First Things First: “The lodger knocking on my window” 10:57: Cheat Sheet: “I slept with the lead singer” 19:34: Worst Ex: “He would espouse these quite conservative views” 25:57: Best I Ever Had: “I'm fluent in Spanish, but I wasn’t familiar with all the dirty words” 32:52: This One’s on Me: “I’m very anti dating writers” 36:09: Love Is Embarrassing: “I don’t even know if he got my letter” 42:02: Fuck-It List: “I think I tried everything wild” 45:38: That’s a Deal-Breaker: “I just don’t believe men should be flexible” 49:54: Status Update: “Painfully single” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Charles on X! https://x.com/charlesxholmes Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen Guest: Charles Holmes Supervising producer: Justin Sayles Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle Video editing and production: Kayla Talley Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris Motion design: Skull Closet Studio Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from http://premiumbeat.com. CONNECT Instagram: instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod TikTok: tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod Sophia's Twitter: x.com/1followernodad Sophia's Instagram: instagram.com/sgbenoit Kelsey's TikTok: tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen Kelsey's Instagram: instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In which we learn that writing a newsletter can get you (almost) laid. This week on None of My Business, we meet Luke*, a 33-year-old whose love language is coordinated outfits and has a particularly shocking story about the one who got away. And joining Sophia and Kelsey to read as Luke is the hilarious comedian Carter Hambley. (*As always, not Luke’s real name, but definitely his real stories.) This week’s episode includes … 00:00: When a ghosting becomes a haunting. 04:50: Our guest: Carter Hambley. 09:18: Our business: “Luke.” 11:17: First Things First: “I grew up Presbyterian.” 18:02: One Who Got Away: “A building with 40 stories.” 39:45: Best I Ever Had: “Sex is great either place.” 51:13: Best I Ever Had Part 2: “I’m going to ask him to film us f*****g.” 1:02:28: Status Update: “I’m enjoying the fun.” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Carter on IG! https://www.instagram.com/carterhambley Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen Guest: Cater Hambley Supervising producer: Justin Sayles Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle Video editing and production: Kayla Talley Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris Motion design: Skull Closet Studio Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from http://premiumbeat.com. CONNECT Instagram: instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod TikTok: tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod Sophia's Twitter: x.com/1followernodad Sophia's Instagram: instagram.com/sgbenoit Kelsey's TikTok: tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen Kelsey's Instagram: instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Get ready to find out what asynchronous swinging is. This week, we welcome on Rachel Lindsay, a former Bachelorette and the host of the esteemed Ringer podcasts Higher Learning and Morally Corrupt. Rachel will be helping us share stories from Jessica* that include fun with polyamory, a spicy hookup in the kitchen, and a lot more. (*As always, not her real name, but definitely her real stories.) This week’s episode includes … 00:00: Would you sign up for a reality dating show?03:50: Our guest: Rachel Lindsay11:24: Our business: “Jessica”15:05: First Things First: “I was arranging it like a business deal.”22:44: Worst Ex: “He’s the reason I live in Charlottesville.”27:28: Love Is an Open Door: “We got pretty close to an actual swinging situation.”51:19: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun: “I barely touched him. It was all about me.”55:29: Best I Ever Had: “I got no sleep. But it was so good.” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Rachel on Instagram!https://www.instagram.com/therachlindsay/ Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Rachel LindsaySupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from http://premiumbeat.com. CONNECTInstagram: http://instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.podTikTok: http://tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.podSophia's Twitter: http://x.com/1followernodadSophia's Instagram: http://instagram.com/sgbenoitKelsey's TikTok: http://tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensenKelsey's Instagram: http://instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week, we’re fanning the flames of love with stories about a wild date with an arsonist, an international affair to remember, and some hands-on research. Joining us in the middle chair is the hilarious Blair Socci, whose voice you may recognize from ‘Bob’s Burgers,’ the ‘Aqua Teen Hunger Force’ movie, or her amazing new podcast, ‘Spaced Out With Blair Socci.’ Blair will be reading as “Corrine”—and as always, these are real stories, even if that’s not Corrine’s real name. Today’s episode includes … 00:00: We gotta stop pumping these guys up.04:53: Our guest: Blair Socci11:14: Our Business: “Corrine”19:25: First Things First: “Let me tell you: Ow.”25:06: Best I Ever Had: "What Happens in Bed: A Performance Art Piece."30:06: Craziest Sex Stories: “The arson’s bad. That bums me out.”43:07: One Who Got Away: “The person who told me that Boone had OD’ed.”50:04: One Who Got Away Part 2: “Sun. Tacos. Hanging out with you." If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Buy tickets to Blair’s benefit show on December 6th at the Largo featuring Anthony Jeselnik and many more!https://wl.eventim.us/event/blair-socci-and-friends/669217?afflky=LargoAtTheCoronet Follow Blair’s new podcast on Instagram!https://www.instagram.com/spacedoutwithblairsocci/?hl=en Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Blair SocciSupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from http://premiumbeat.com. CONNECTInstagram: instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.podTikTok: tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.podSophia's Twitter: x.com/1followernodadSophia's Instagram: instagram.com/sgbenoitKelsey's TikTok: tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensenKelsey's Instagram: instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Love is a battlefield. Literally. Today, we bring you a tale that involves a breakup at Gettysburg, a wild hotel balcony incident, and a mysterious sex god named Don who’s had a little bit of trouble with TSA. And sharing these stories is the hilarious Tamara Yajia, author of the new book ‘Cry for Me, Argentina: My Life as a Failed Child Star’ and someone who enjoys a good time at Jumbo’s Clown Room. Tam will be reading as “Francesca”—as always, not a real name but definitely all real stories. Today’s episode includes … 00:00: Kelsey is Sophia’s travel nightmare02:48: Our Guest: Tamara Yajia09:40: Our Business: “Francesca”13:35: First Things First: “The back of my 2001 Acura MDX”22:08: Worst Ex:  “We broke up at Gettysburg”31:00: Best I’ve Ever Had: “It’s gotta be Don. It’s Don.”46:46: Craziest Hookup: “Fully nude. Fully outside.”51:01: Status Update: “Five or six. They’re all so needy.” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Follow Tam on Instagram!instagram.com/tamarayajia Buy Tam’s new book, ‘Cry for Me Argentina: My Life as a Failed Child Star’https://a.co/d/7bHd9LJ Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Tamara YajiaSupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from http://premiumbeat.com. CONNECTInstagram: instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.podTikTok: tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.podSophia's Twitter: x.com/1followernodadSophia's Instagram: instagram.com/sgbenoitKelsey's TikTok: tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensenKelsey's Instagram: instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Get ready to get tossed around, WWE style. Today, we welcome EJ Marcus, the hilarious comedian and writer on the new HBO show, ‘I Love LA.’ He’ll be reading as Delaney*, a 31-year-old from Ithaca who describes herself as “culturally a lesbian, but bisexual." Join us as we break down stories about random BDSM hookups, what it’s like being the third in TWO separate relationships, and a nightmare of a soccer team coaching arrangement. (*Not her real name, definitely her real stories.) This episode includes … 00:00: Kelsey loves magic (still).07:33: Our guest: EJ Marcus13:10: Our business: "Delaney"15:39: First Things First: “People are doing this all the time?”25:48: Worst Ex: "She wouldn’t even tell people she was my girlfriend.”37:57: Best I Ever Had: "Not all heterosexual men really love women.”54:08: Craziest Hookup: "Whips and restraints and ball gags”1:01:50: Status Update: “Two couples” If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com Follow EJ Marcus!Instagram: instagram.com/ejhavingfunTikTok: tiktok.com/@ejhavingfun Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: EJ MarcusSupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license by http://premiumbeat.com CONNECTInstagram: instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.podTikTok: tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.podSophia's Twitter: x.com/1followernodadSophia's Instagram: instagram.com/sgbenoitKelsey's TikTok: tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensenKelsey's Instagram: instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

An episode heavy on crime: shoplifting, missing people, and overdue porno tapes. This week, we welcome on the one and only Van Lathan, the host of Ringer podcasts such as Higher Learning, Midnight Boys, and Ringer Tailgate. He’ll be reading as Valentina*, a woman who’s had her fair share of weird exes and heartbreak, but is managing to dance her way through it all. (*Not her real name, definitely her real stories.) Today’s business includes … 00:00: Voice memos are hell.05:11: Our guest: Van Lathan06:31: Our business: "Valentina"08:16: First Things First: “He produced for the Wu-Tang Clan specifically.”12:05: Worst Ex: "I turn around and standing there is his mom.”26:46: One Who Got Away: "If there is criminal activity …”45:08: Best I Ever Had: "The Prince."50:04: Status Update: "Conscious celibacy." If you have business you’d like to submit, reach out to us at noneofmybusinesspodcast@gmail.com. Instagram: instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.podTikTok: tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.podSophia's Twitter: x.com/1followernodadSophia's Instagram: instagram.com/sgbenoitKelsey's TikTok: tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensenKelsey's Instagram: instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen Van's Instagram: instagram.com/vanlathanVan's Twitter: x.com/VanLathan Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June JensenGuest: Van LathanSupervising producer: Justin SaylesAdditional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin GayleVideo editing and production: Kayla TalleySocial: Sasha Ashall and Austin GayleArt direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya ZenierisMotion design: Skull Closet StudioAdditional motion design support: Chris CalletonTheme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license by premiumbeat.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices