Blended

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla to unpack a dilemma that challenges the unspoken expectations of blended families.A woman writes in about her relationship with a man who has children from a previous partner. When they first got together, he was happy to keep things separate, no pressure to step into a parenting role, and that suited her perfectly. But now, his family have started making comments, and he’s beginning to change his mind. Suddenly, the idea of becoming a stepmum feels less like a choice and more like an expectation.The panel really respect her honesty, she laid out her boundaries from the start but they question whether being with someone who has kids means you have to take on the stepparent role eventually. Cilla argues that while you might start off playing the aunty or the cool friend, that approach doesn’t work long-term especially if you live together. The aim, she says, should be to grow.Not everyone agrees. Kate and Nathalie discuss the emotional pressure women often face to "mother" in blended dynamics, and the fine line between respecting someone’s boundaries and avoiding the impact on the children involved. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-host Nathalie and TV and radio presenter Snoochie Shy for a powerful conversation about big life moments, loyalty, and how blended family dynamics can make emotional decisions even harder. Snoochie brings a unique perspective, not as a parent but as someone who grew up with a stepdad she’s incredibly close to. Together, the panel dive into two dilemmas from listeners trying to balance love and loyalty. In the first, a woman wants her stepdad to walk her down the aisle, but worries it will offend her biological father. In the second, a listener wants both her mum and stepmum in the room when she gives birth but fears her mum won’t take it well. Nathalie doesn’t think anyone should put pressure on someone else’s feelings, while Kate understands why it might still hurt there are moments you naturally dream of sharing with your child. Snoochie reminds us that communication is everything, and that your wishes matter just as much as anyone else’s. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and Nathalie to unpack a dilemma that’s left one stepmum torn between her child and her parents.She writes in devastated that since having a baby with her partner, her parents have changed, they only want to look after their biological grandchild and have completely pulled away from her stepson. Before the baby arrived, they treated him like their own. Now, she’s heartbroken and questioning whether she ever imagined having to set boundaries with her own family.Kate doesn't agree, saying that all children deserve to feel included and that if your family won’t treat them equally, it’s your job to protect the child. But Cilla challenges that view, arguing that while you may choose a blended family, others in your life aren’t always obliged to be on board even if it hurts.Together, they explore a painful but important question: where do you draw the line when it’s your own parents showing bias? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and her husband Rio Ferdinand, as they tackle a dilemma that a stepmum writes in concerned that her partner is a loving, present father to their child but wasn’t like that with his older children. She worries about the difference in how he shows up, and how that might affect the kids.The group get real about what happens when parents evolve. Rio opens up about being in a different stage of life now more present and admits that in the past, he put family on the back burner while focused on his football career. It’s an honest reflection on how age, maturity, and life circumstances can shape how someone parents.They also revisit a dilemma from a previous episode that Rio joined for a few minutes to discuss but didn’t get to break it down, a dad who is taking in his biological daughter but allowing his stepdaughter to go into care. They discuss whether biology should ever be the dividing line, and what it really means to show up for a child. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla to unpack a dilemma that touches on family loyalty, jealousy, and boundaries.A stepmum writes in upset that her partner’s mum still has a close relationship with his ex. They spend time together, but she and her mother-in-law have no relationship at all. She admits it makes her feel jealous, insecure, and even a little pushed out of the family.Kate argues that this is a normal reaction most people would feel the same sting but stresses that it’s important to recognise the feeling without acting on it. Cilla takes a tougher stance, saying it’s none of the stepmum’s business as long as her partner’s mum has a good relationship with her son and grandchildren.The panel explores the wider questions: What happens when loyalties blur across old and new relationships? Is it natural to feel jealous, or does jealousy create bigger problems? And how do you navigate in-laws who still keep one foot in the past? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Nathalie are joined by special guest co-host, presenter and dad Rickie Haywood-Williams. Together, they tackle the dilemma of a mum whose biological son lives with his dad, while she lives with her partner, stepdaughter and their new baby. She admits she never thought she wouldn’t live with her biological child, and now she worries she can feel him pulling away as she builds a family under a different roof.For Rickie, this hits really close to home. His oldest daughter is from a previous relationship, and now he lives with his stepdaughter and young son. He talks honestly about how he navigated that shift with his daughter, stressing how important it is to keep expressing love, carving out time just for them, and staying consistent even when teenagers seem distant. Sometimes, he says, it’s just about sending that text or making that call even if it doesn’t get a reply.Kate reflects on her own household, where the little ones are desperate to see the older kids. Nathalie channels her inner Cilla and reminds everyone that different households can have different rules, and that’s okay what matters most is the connection and the love.The panel also debate the role of phones. Rickie shares that if he could go back, he’d have restricted phones for longer, because while they help kids stay in touch across households, they can also pull children into isolation and take away valuable family time. The group talk about guilt, balance, and how to make sure your children feel seen and loved no matter where they call home.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Nathalie and Cilla to unpack a heartbreaking dilemma.A mum writes in devastated after her partner refused to take in his daughter’s older sister meaning she may end up in care. She’s torn apart, not just for the child, but also because she fears what it says about her partner. If he can turn his back on his daughter’s sibling, could he one day do the same to her son?The ladies feel very strongly that siblings should not be split up and urge the mum to fight for the girl to live with them. Cilla and Nathalie share their anger at how a child could be left behind, while Kate calls Rio to join the show to get a male perspective. Rio insists he wouldn’t let a child go into care but he’s also brutally honest that a lot of men might, when faced with financial pressure or the question of biology.Together they explore whether “not my child” is ever a fair excuse, the painful reality of how easy some people can separate siblings, and what responsibility really looks like in blended families.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Nathalie are joined by Jessica May, the influencer known for her cleaning hacks, parenting advice, and unfiltered honesty. Jessica opens up about one of the worst times of her life: discovering her partner’s betrayal, the devastation that followed, and the painful process of rebuilding not just her life, but her sense of self.She doesn’t sugarcoat a thing dropping raw truths and bombshells that leave the ladies stunned. Nathalie can’t hide her frustration at the injustice Jess has faced, while Kate is in awe of the grace and strength she’s found through it all. At the heart of her story? One focus: making sure her daughters are happy, no matter what.Together, they tackle a dilemma from a mum whose ex and his new partner keep trying to control what happens in her home. Where’s the line between co-parenting and overstepping? The ladies don’t hold back, debating how to set boundaries, when to push back, and what healthy co-parenting really looks like.And when the conversation turns to discipline, the panel is split: Kate believes stepparents should be able to tell a child off if they live with and care for them while Jessica is clear she wouldn’t want anyone but dad stepping in with her girls.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie to tackle a dilemma that cuts to the heart of step-parenting. A listener writes in about her stepson, who she’s helped raise for almost a decade after his biological mum wasn’t around. For years, she’s been the one doing the school runs, bedtime routines, and being “mum” in every way that mattered.But now his biological mum has reappeared and everything has shifted. Her stepson’s behaviour has changed, and suddenly the stepmum feels like she’s being pushed out of a role she’s built her life around.The ladies explore the painful truth many stepparents face: the sense that, no matter how much love and care you give, you can still be sidelined when a biological parent decides to step back in. They discuss the emotions at play from a mum’s possible shame for not being there, to a child’s natural pull towards wanting that maternal bond, to the stepmum’s fear of being discarded after years of sacrifice.Kate and Nathalie debate whether the stepmum should hold firm in her place as the one who’s raised him, or whether blended families sometimes have to weather these painful shifts. They also talk about how to stop resentment building, the importance of reassurance for both the child and the step-parent, and why blended families need to be ready for these moments of sudden change.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

 This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and special guest co-host Joel Beya — presenter, founder of Cheeky Sport, and dad — who brings a raw and honest male perspective to the table. Together, they tackle a dilemma from a woman whose partner won’t let her meet his ex. She’s asked, he keeps avoiding it, and now she’s starting to get suspicious.Is this a massive red flag, or just a man not ready to blend the past with the present? Joel is brutally honest about why some men hold back, admitting he’s hurt people in the past simply because he wasn’t ready or serious. Kate says she’d want to meet the ex and build a relationship for the children’s sake but Joel pushes back, arguing it’s not always that simple.The trio debate Is it about protecting boundaries, or avoiding responsibility? and the ladies discuss why women can't settle for mixed signals instead of acting like the prize. Just when things heat up, Joel drops his belief that there’s no such thing as “one true love” — and that doesn’t sit well with Kate or Nathalie.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand, and co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie invite listeners into their group chat — the place where wild dilemmas get sent. Some never make it to the podcast because they're just too outrageous… but today, they’re tackling two viral moments that had people talking.The first? A woman who bought food for her six biological children but not for her stepchild. Her husband asked, but she didn’t see anything wrong with it. The ladies get heated as they unpack whether this is the ultimate “wicked stepmother” behaviour, and question why the dad stood by and let it happen.The second? A stepdad who wasn’t invited to his stepdaughter’s graduation, despite being in her life since she was four months old. Hurt, he decided to cut off financial support. The panel debates whether this was justified or damaging, asking: what role did the mother play, and is this about boundaries or bitterness?Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and is joined by co-hosts Nathalie and her husband, Sayce Holmes-Lewis, to unpack a dilemma from a stepmum who feels her partner is still doing a lot for his ex and is starting to wonder if she’s being jealous and petty, or if there’s a real cause for concern.Nathalie believes a man should always be there for the mother of his child but Kate and Sayce disagree they think boundaries are essential, and that being an ex means you don’t get the same privileges as when you were in a relationship. So where is the line?The trio discuss what’s “too far” when it comes to helping an ex, how to keep the focus on the child’s wellbeing, and why clear boundaries protect everyone. Sayce also shares an overlooked male perspective, how moving out of the family home and not seeing your children every day can be an emotional struggle, and why men need to prepare themselves for that shift.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie to unpack a heartbreak that many stepmums quietly carry: the grief of losing their stepchildren after a breakup.A listener writes in devastation after her relationship ended not because of the partner, but because she no longer gets to see the children she helped raise. Their mother doesn’t think it’s appropriate, and just like that, it’s like she never existed.The panel discuss the emotional fallout stepmums can face when love isn’t “enough” to grant them long-term connection even after years of parenting. Kate opens up about how this exact scenario has always been one of her biggest fears and admits she doesn’t think she’d cope.Cilla reflects on the reality vs. the ideal reminding us that we don’t live in a world where every bond is protected just because it’s real. And Nathalie asks the big question: what impact does it have on the children when someone who loves them simply disappears?This is a powerful conversation about invisible grief, unspoken heartbreak, and the emotional toll of loving children you don’t legally “own.” Because when stepmums are told to love like a parent but let go like a stranger.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla along with very special guest co-host Nieki Shaw , a child protection solicitor, co-parenting mentor and the founder of Legally Nik, where she helps families navigate complex legal realities around blended families and co-parenting. We get so many legal dilemmas on this podcast, and while we’re always here to share our experiences — this week, we brought in an expert.Nik answers two powerful dilemmas from listeners:One from a stepmum wondering what rights she’d have if something ever happened to her partner and whether she’d legally be able to stay in the child’s life.And another where a stepmum posted a photo online, and the biological mum cut off all contact, raising urgent questions around parental alienation, boundaries, and protecting the child’s relationship with both parents.Nik breaks down what parental responsibility really means, and when a Stepparent Responsibility Order might be needed. She explains the difference between “lives with” orders and “spends time with” orders, when to apply for Specific Issue Orders, and why the Welfare Checklist is at the heart of every child-based legal decision in the UK.They also explore why there’s no such thing as “full custody” in the UK, how to prepare if you’re going to represent yourself in court including the role a McKenzie Friend can play in supporting you through the process. Nik also talks about why it’s so important to put your wishes in writing, especially when it comes to children and wills and why this is even more essential when a stepparent is involved.  Check out Legally Nik's Website Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and Nathalie for an honest conversation about one of the biggest pressures new parents face in blended families — how do you start conversations about the values, routines, and boundaries you want for your first child together… without causing offence?A listener writes in, worried about how to bring up parenting differences with her partner. She’s about to have their first baby together and doesn’t want him assuming things will be the same as with his older kids. But how do you have that conversation without it sounding like you’re criticising his parenting?The ladies discuss why values and routines aren’t just about control they’re about raising healthy, secure children. Nathalie argues that setting boundaries and not encouraging can make kids rebel, while Cilla believes there are times children need firm direction, even if it’s hard in the moment.They also share tips on how to start the conversation without comparing or criticising — and why nothing should be left to chance when it comes to raising kids in a blended home.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and special guest co-host Jamelia — singer, songwriter, actress, and mum. Jamelia speaks openly and honestly about her own blended family experience, the heartbreak she faced, what her kids went through, and why she wouldn’t be part of a blended family again. She shares how, at times, she genuinely thought she wouldn’t make it through and why she'd now choose to keep her relationships separate.The panel also tackles a dilemma from a mum whose daughter isn’t coping with her new blended setup; the kids just aren’t clicking, and it’s making life at home uncomfortable. Jamelia reflects on how her own daughter felt when someone moved in, and Kate asks whether you can really be happy in a relationship if the children aren’t.Cilla shares why she believes children are allowed to feel sad about big changes and why sometimes you have to sit in the uncomfortable moments as a family.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate is joined by Cilla and Nathalie to explore a dilemma that hits hard for so many women in blended families: loving your partner, loving their children but still wanting a baby of your own.A listener writes in to say she’s been a stepmum for five years and adores her partner’s children but she’s always imagined having her own baby too. The problem? Her partner says he’s done. No more kids. And now she’s wondering if she can really accept that… or if she’s risking a lifetime of regret.The ladies explore what it means to compromise on something this big and whether love alone is enough when your dreams don’t align. They also reflect on how desires can shift, how long you should “wait and see" before resentment kicks in.Cilla shares the emotional story of someone who waited, missed her window, and ended up heartbroken. They also reflect on the pressure of the biological clock, the power of honesty, and the importance of advocating for what you want before it’s too late.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and special guest co-host Rio to respond to a heartfelt dilemma from a listener asking how she can best support her brother, a single dad raising two daughters on his own.  Rio shares his personal experiences of solo parenting after loss, opening up about the emotional guilt of leaving your children even briefly, the pressure to always “get it right,” and why having a support system matters so much. The conversation turns to the emotional wellbeing of single dads how men can be encouraged to look after themselves, make space to date again, and allow themselves to feel.Kate becomes emotional as she reflects on her stepchildren’s experiences with grief and how her understanding has deepened now that she’s also a biological mum. Together, the trio explore how solo parents, especially fathers can be supported emotionally, practically, and socially without judgment. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie to unpack a dilemma that so many stepparents silently struggle with: discipline.A listener writes in feeling completely overridden by her partner when it comes to setting boundaries with his children. She tried to discipline calmly and respectfully but he jumped in, reversed her decision, and made her feel like she had no right to step in at all.The trio discusses what discipline should look like in blended homes, and how stepparents can feel confident in their role without overstepping. Is discipline only for biological parents? What message does it send to children when their stepparent’s authority is constantly undermined?They also explore how couples can get on the same page when it comes to parenting, the difference between discipline and telling off, and why real teamwork is essentialFollow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-host Nathalie and special guest co-host Ashley John-Baptiste — , journalist, documentary-maker and now author of Looked After, his powerful memoir.Ashley’s no stranger to the podcast and he’s back to talk about his own story growing up in the UK care system, living with five different families, and never quite feeling like he belonged. In this emotional and honest conversation, he shares how that shaped his sense of identity, his education, his relationships, and the kind of father he is today.The trio also tackle a heartfelt dilemma from a listener who's trying to help her foster son feel welcomed into their family especially by her partner, who’s parenting for the first time. Ashley shares real insight into what children in care may be feeling in moments like this, while Nathalie opens up about her own past and how childhood trauma can lead to emotional walls and coping mechanisms.This is a moving episode about identity, resilience, and the healing power of love and a reminder that family isn’t always where you start, but what you grow. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.