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But You Look So Good

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Two psychologists on a mission to illuminate the realities of living with chronic health conditions. Hosted by Sally Shaw and Seona Ilalio, both living with chronic conditions themselves. They lead Livology, a private practice specialising in psychological support for those navigating chronic health challenges. Tune in to hear candid conversations and professional insights designed to create community and connection within the chronic health conditions population.
22 Episodes
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Coping with Christmas

Coping with Christmas

2024-12-2343:58

In this episode, Seona and Sally delve into the whirlpool of the festive season, sharing personal anecdotes and exploring strategies to help you manage the stress and chaos of Christmas. From dealing with grief during the holidays to navigating the pressure of social expectations, they offer practical tips and psychological insights. Tune in for a candid discussion that prioritises connection over perfection, and learn how to create a joyful season, even amidst the holiday madness. Perfect for anyone looking to transform their Christmas from a time of endurance to a time of genuine enjoyment. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
Is Cancer Chronic? Join Sally and Seona as they explore the complex nature of cancer as a chronic illness. In this episode, they welcome Marisa Stevens, an oncology nurse practitioner, to discuss the practical, social, and emotional challenges faced by patients living with cancer. Listen in as they debunk myths, share insights on the importance of holistic care, and highlight the significance of ongoing support in the cancer journey. Featuring candid conversations about the realities of cancer, this episode is a must-listen for anyone wanting to understand cancer beyond the diagnosis. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
A World of Pain

A World of Pain

2024-12-0935:28

In this episode, Sally and Seona share their thoughts on the SBS documentary A World of Pain, hosted by Osher Günsberg. They discuss its portrayal of chronic pain, offering their unique perspectives as psychologists living with chronic health conditions. They also explore the broader implications of living with chronic pain on mental health, social relationships, and self-identity. Whether you experience chronic pain or are just curious about the subject, this episode offers valuable perspectives and honest critiques. Link to Documentary: https://www.sbs.com.au/ondemand/tv-program/osher-guensberg-a-world-of-pain/2384578627623 ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
Performing Illness

Performing Illness

2024-12-0249:111

In this episode of But You Look So Good, Seona and Sally delve into the sensitive and multifaceted topic of Performing Illness. They examine how the need for validation, the search for community, and the desire for support can influence the way people navigate and present their experiences with chronic health conditions. With empathy and insight, they discuss the fine line between authentically managing a condition and over-identifying with it, exploring how these dynamics can impact one's identity and relationships. Join them for a thoughtful conversation on finding balance and authenticity while living with chronic illness. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
In this relatable episode, Sally and Seona dive into the world of mindfulness and meditation. Will it help you unwind, or will your mind wander to snacks and never-ending to-do lists? They share personal stories, clinical insights, and practical tips on integrating mindfulness and meditation into everyday life. Explore how mindfulness and meditation can reduce stress, manage pain, and boost focus—even during the chaos of daily routines. Plus, join them for a 2-week challenge and put these ideas into action!  Links:  Dr Sarah Strohmaier Sarah’s paper on the effect of mindfulness practice length: https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s12671-020-01512-5 Sarah’s paper on the effect of mindfulness practice length: https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s12671-020-01512-5 Diaphragmatic Breathing Handout Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
In this episode, Sally and Seona dive into the world of support groups in response to a listener’s question about their value. Tune in as they share personal stories and insights on the benefits—and sometimes challenges—of peer support for mental health and chronic conditions. From overcoming initial doubts to discovering genuine connections, they explore how support groups can be wonderfully beneficial. Plus, they cover the dos and don’ts for anyone leading or joining a group. Whether you’re considering joining a support group or simply curious, this episode offers honest and valuable perspectives! ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
In this episode, Sally and Seona sit down with dietitian Marnie Nitschke to dig into the tricky relationship people with chronic health conditions often have with food. Marnie shares her expertise on balanced eating, myth-busting around specific diets, and why “one-size-fits-all” nutrition rarely works. They explore popular diets like anti-inflammatory and Mediterranean, discussing the value of an individualised approach and why a dietitian can be an essential part of your care team. Plus, Marnie tackles common food misconceptions and wraps up with a round of rapid-fire questions. A must-listen for practical advice and fresh insights! Marnie Nitschke, Dietitian https://www.forkthatnutrition.com/ Instagram @forkthatnutrition  ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
In this reflective episode of But You Look So Good, Sally and Seona explore the layered experience of sharing their personal and professional journeys with chronic health conditions. They tackle the emotional costs of storytelling, finding the right boundaries, and the delicate balance between vulnerability and privacy. With warmth and honesty, they open up about the challenges and rewards of sharing openly, while discussing the deeper sense of connection it fosters in the community. Whether you’re curious about the power of lived experience or navigating similar paths, tune in to hear their insights on storytelling, self-compassion, and the evolution of authenticity. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
Grief is Complicated

Grief is Complicated

2024-10-2839:44

In this episode of But You Look So Good, Seona and Sally delve into the layers of grief that are unique to those living with chronic health conditions. They explore how grief shows up in unexpected ways - not just with the loss of loved ones, but through shifts in self-identity, altered life dreams, abilities and evolving relationships. Together, they discuss how to manage these often invisible but very real losses, share strategies for coping, highlight the power of social support, and talk about the potential for personal growth through the grieving process. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
Join Sally and Seona as they dive into the concept of 'performing wellness.' In a candid and humorous discussion, they reflect on their personal experiences and the societal pressures to project an image of perfect health and well-being. From the myth of needing to hit 10,000 steps a day to the challenges of managing chronic health conditions, Sally and Seona explore how internal and external expectations shape our behaviour. They talk about the balancing act of keeping up with exercise routines, sleep hygiene, dietary choices, and social connections—all without succumbing to the anxiety of "performing" wellness. Tune in for insights on maintaining self-compassion and finding balance in your journey toward well-being. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
In this episode, Sally and Seona introduce a new series of episodes titled "How Do You Feel About That?" which will pop up throughout the usual content. These episodes will explore various topics from their perspectives as psychologists. They delve into the origins of the question "How do you feel about that?"—often seen as a cliché but essential in therapy. The hosts debunk the myth that therapy is only for crises or serious mental health diagnoses, stressing the importance of early intervention. With Telehealth more accessible post-COVID, they encourage anyone who's considered seeking support to do so sooner rather than later. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
You're So Lucky

You're So Lucky

2024-10-0739:48

In this episode, Sally and Seona dive into the frustrating comment, "You're so lucky," often directed at people living with chronic health conditions. Whether it's being told they’re fortunate for not having to work or receiving government support, these remarks can feel dismissive and undermine the challenges of chronic illness. Through personal anecdotes, client stories, and professional insights, the hosts explore how to reframe society’s obsession with productivity and redefine purpose in the face of life’s challenges. Tune in for an eye-opening discussion on resilience, self-care, and the power of thoughtful communication. Links  ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠ Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
I Get Tired Too

I Get Tired Too

2024-09-3034:16

In this week's episode of But You Look So Good, Sally and Seona explore the complexities of relatability when living with a chronic health condition. While well-meaning friends and family often try to connect, their efforts can sometimes feel dismissive or invalidating—especially when it comes to fatigue. Through personal stories, roleplays, and relatable scenarios, they unpack the stark difference between everyday symptoms and the persistent, overwhelming nature of chronic ones. Join the conversation to gain insights on how to foster genuine connection, empathy, and better communication with loved ones, while validating the unique challenges faced by those living with chronic conditions. Links  ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
Who Am I Now?

Who Am I Now?

2024-09-2351:47

In this episode of But You Look So Good, hosts Sally and Seona explore the question, “Who am I now?” after receiving a chronic health diagnosis. They share personal experiences, answer listener questions, and provide practical insights on how to navigate the shifts in identity that come with health challenges. From societal expectations to the internal process of self-acceptance, this episode takes a thoughtful look at how chronic illness reshapes who we are. Join the conversation and discover ways to find clarity and empowerment on this complex journey. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
Join hosts Sally Shaw and Seona Ilalio as they dive into the topic of toxic positivity and the societal push to categorise emotions as 'good' or 'bad.' In a world that celebrates relentless positivity, those living with chronic health conditions frequently hear the refrain to "just stay positive," an expectation that often comes from both external sources and internal self-talk. Sally and Seona discuss how this messaging can invalidate personal experiences, especially when coupled with the habit of comparing struggles and telling ourselves it "could be worse." Together, they explore the importance of recognising all emotions and introduce the concept of realistic optimism—finding a balanced, healthier way to incorporate positivity without dismissing the complexity of living with a chronic health condition. Tune in for an honest conversation about embracing the full spectrum of emotions and learning how to authentically uplift ourselves along the way. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. ⁠Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast⁠
"It's Such a Shame"

"It's Such a Shame"

2024-09-0941:46

In this episode, Sally Shaw and Seona Ilalio explore the complex and often hidden emotion of shame, drawing on Brené Brown's powerful definition: "the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love, belonging, and connection." We unpack how shame can impact those living with chronic health conditions, making them feel isolated and less than. Through personal stories and honest conversations, they discuss vulnerability as the antidote to shame, highlighting how opening up can dismantle these feelings and foster genuine connection. Join them as they delve into the power of communication, showing how sharing our struggles not only combats shame but also brings us closer together on a deeply human level. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast
I Can Control It

I Can Control It

2024-09-0240:20

In this episode, we explore the inherent human desire for control—why it's so deeply ingrained and how it plays out in the context of living with a chronic health condition. We highlight how our quest to control every aspect of our health can sometimes do more harm than good. We’ll discuss the delicate balance between control and management, offering practical insights on how to develop a healthy relationship with control that empowers rather than overwhelms. Join us as we unpack strategies for finding your footing in a world where not everything can be controlled but where some control can still make all the difference. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠. Instagram @butyoulooksogoodpodcast
"Did You See 60 Minutes?" is about the common experience of people living with chronic health conditions being frequently told by others to watch certain TV shows, read specific articles, or consider various miracle cures they saw on programs like "60 Minutes". The episode delves into why people tend to share these types of stories and advice, often without understanding the complexities of chronic illness. It explores the reasons behind this behaviour, such as a desire to help, the influence of cultural narratives about overcoming adversity, and the pressure to find solutions. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠.
This week, Sally Shaw and Seona Ilalio dive into the concept of "Inspiration Porn," a term used to describe society's tendency to view people with disabilities or chronic health conditions as inspirational simply for living their daily lives. The episode unpacks how this perception can be both flattering and problematic, exploring the impact it has on those who are often labelled as "inspirational" without their consent. Sally and Seona discuss the complexities of being seen as special just for carrying on after a diagnosis, examining how intent plays a crucial role in how these compliments are received. They also reflect on the fine line between genuine admiration and objectification, offering insights into how to approach the idea of inspiration with sensitivity and awareness. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠.
"While You Still Can"

"While You Still Can"

2024-08-1342:46

This episode explores the pervasive sense of impending doom that many people with chronic health conditions experience. It delves into both external and internal pressures to seize opportunities and "live life to the fullest" before their condition potentially worsens. Hosts Sally Shaw and Seona Illaio examine how this messaging, often conveyed by well-meaning friends, family, and even society, can create a sense of urgency and fear, leading to feelings of inadequacy or anxiety. It also looks at how these messages are internalised, influencing decisions and behaviours, and the emotional toll it takes on those trying to balance the desire to live fully with the reality of their health condition. ⁠⁠Livology (Psychology - Private Practice)⁠⁠ ⁠⁠MS: Get Your Head Around It! (Online Course)⁠⁠ If you need any support after listening to our podcast, you can contact Lifeline in Australia at 13 11 14, available 24/7. For support in other locations, please visit ⁠Befrienders Worldwide⁠.
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