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Transforming Relationship with Emotional Savvy
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Transforming Relationship with Emotional Savvy

Author: Rhoberta Shaler, PhD

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Your go-to source for life-changing shifts in how you think about --and create relationship with--yourself and other humans. Discover new options for building the strength, assertiveness, resilience, boundaries, and balance needed to develop healthier relationships, ones based on equality, reciprocity, and mutuality. 


Listening to these in-depth discussions with expert guests on a broad range of relationship topics can open your eyes, heart, and mind to new possibilities for creating the healthy, emotionally intimate relationship you want at home, and the clear, assertive one you need at work.


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HAVE YOU EVER FELT BETRAYED? HAVE YOU EVER FULLY BEEN ABLE TO TRUST YOURSELF OR ANOTHER AGAIN? This episode looks at different forms of betrayal, including infidelity. Who typically betrays? One of the questions I had for my guest, Dr. Debi Silber, was on the topic of parental betrayal. Often, a person doesn't want to think or believe that they were betrayed by their parents. Because of brain development, and culture, we want to--and often need to--believe that our parents had our best interests at heart. That's not always true. #Hijackal parents, for example, only have their own best interests in mind, and their children are simply pawns in the process. Betrayal is real! What do you think, feel, or do when the person, or people, you trust most in the world are the one's who betray you? A big question we talk a lot about as we define 'betrayal." HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:Answers to...Why do you numb yourself, or avoid or distract yourself, when things are going very wrong?What can you do to feel or face what really needs your attention?What is Post Betrayal Syndrome?What do you do to experience a Post Betrayal Transformation?What are the five stages you go through--or, can go through--from betrayal to breakthrough?>>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you.ARE YOU--OR, HAVE YOU BEEN--IN A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP WITH A PARTNER, EX, PARENT, OR SIBLING?Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships. All safely off social media, too!___________________________________GUEST: DR. DEBI SILBERDr. Debi Silber, founder of The PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute in New York and https://pbtinstitute.com is a holistic psychologist, a health, mindset, and personal development expert. She's an award-winning speaker, coach and author of the Amazon #1 Bestselling book: The Unshakable Woman: 4 Steps to Rebuilding Your Body, Mind and Life After a Life Crisis, The Unshakable Woman-The Workbook (the companion guide to the book) as well as 2 books recommended by Brian Tracy, Marshall Goldsmith and Jack Canfield.Debi has contributed to FOX, CBS, The Dr. Oz show, TEDx, The Huffington Post, Shape, Self, Health, Working Mother, Forbes, Psychology Today, WebMD, Ladies Home Journal, Woman's World and Glamour to name a few. Her doctoral study led to three discoveries around how women experience and heal from betrayal.Based on her findings, along with 27 years of health, mindset and lifestyle coaching, Dr. Debi has created a proven multi pronged approach to help women heal (physically, mentally and emotionally) from a life crisis, specializing in betrayal.FREE GIFT FROM DR. DEBI SILBER :Take the Quiz: Do You Have Post-Betrayal Syndrome? TAKE IT HERECONTACT INFO FOR DR. DEBI SILBER:Website: PBTInstitute.comPodcasts:LinkedIn: @DebiSilberFacebook: @InspireEmpowerTransformInstagram: @DebiSilberTwitter:  @DebiSilberYouTube: @DebiSilberCONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: TransformingRelationship.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each month.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#AfterBetrayal #PostTrauma #drdebisilber #beyondbetrayal #parentalbetrayal #infidelity #relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #toxicrelationships #narcissisticabuse#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #difficultconversations
Ever feel overwhelmed? That's all too common, right?Does it seem to happen too often? Life is busy. Expectations are high. You feel pushed and pulled by different needs of different people and roles in your life. STRESS! Today, take a breather and listen in. With my guest, Brianna Wilkerson, a holistic health coach, we're giving you some great tips, strategies, insights, and next best steps to reduce stress, and detox life in all areas. Some ideas here are quick and easy. Others take time and consciousness. AND, they are all helpful. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:Answers to...Why do I say toxic things about myself?Why am I so hard on myself?Why am I not satisfied with my body? How can I focus more clearly on my health?What are the seven "must-haves" for a healthy body?What mindset shifts do I need to create a healthier life?>>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you.ARE YOU--OR, HAVE YOU BEEN--IN A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP WITH A PARTNER, EX, PARENT, OR SIBLING?Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships. All safely off social media, too!___________________________________GUEST: BRIANNA WILKERSONBrianna Wilkerson is the Founder/CEO of Made Well 345, LLC. She is a Holistic Health & Life Coach with a heart to see women learn what healthy living really means so they can overcome yo-yo dieting, honor their bodies and get a healthy body they love and are proud of. She is also an Essential Oils Advocate for doTERRA Essential Oils and empowers women to use non-toxic, natural solutions like essential oils for their health and those they love. She is also a Crossfit Level 1 Trainer to further serve women who want to get fit in a way that's functional, fun, and effective.FREE GIFT FROM BRIANNA WILKERSON :7 Day Healthy Body Challenge:Free 7 Day Challenge to learn how you can honor your body and get a healthy body you are proud of. GET IT HERE.CONTACT INFO FOR BRIANNA WILKERSON:Website: MadeWell345.comPodcasts:LinkedIn: @Brianna-WilkersonFacebook: @MadeWell345Instagram: @MadeWell345Twitter:  @MadeWell345YouTube: @MadeWell345CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: TransformingRelationship.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each month.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#BriannaWilkerson #holistichealthcoach #healthierbody #wanttofeelbetter #detoxmylife#relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #toxicrelationships#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #difficultconversations
Oh, a little--maybe, an understatement--controversy here! You'll want to weigh in in the comments, I'm betting. Elliott Katz, today's guest, suggests that today's man is confused about his role in a relationship. Could be. What do you think? Of course, we talked about this at length. When I read Katz' book, Being the Strong Man a Woman Wants, I had big reactions and equally big questions that I could hardly wait to ask him. My sense was that there is a subtext of taking charge in the relationship--and, not always in mutual ways. So, I asked about that. I wanted to know if he could embrace my idea that healthy relationships are built on equality, reciprocity, and mutuality. Hmmmm....interesting conversation! Katz says, " Men today have heard a bewildering messages about being a man in a relationship and can't understand why these ideas aren't working and women are so frustrated with them. Elliott Katz shares insights about being a man that many men today weren't taught. Interestingly, women tell men, "These is what I have been trying to tell you all this time." That sparked a big conversation for sure! I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts on this episode. Join in and like my Facebook page and comment: https://www.facebook.com/Emotional-Savvy-The-Relationship-Help-Show-2309873335890968/?modal=admin_todo_tour HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:What Elliott Katz means by a "strong man"A controversial view on decision-making for couplesDifficulties men have to calibrate the difference between leading and controllingKatz' view on manipulationThreats are not suitable communication >>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you.ARE YOU--OR, HAVE YOU BEEN--IN A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP WITH A PARTNER, EX, PARENT, OR SIBLING?Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships. All safely off social media, too!___________________________________GUEST: ELLIOTT KATZElliott Katz is the author of Being the Strong Man A Woman Wants: Timeless wisdom on being a man that is helping men around the world improve their relationships. It has been translated into 24 languages by publishers in Europe, Asia, Latin America and Africa. For men who can't understand why women are frustrated with them, he shows them what they need to do to gain a woman's love and respect and inspire her to be his partner.FREE GIFT ELLIOTT KATZ :Not at this time. CONTACT INFO FOR ELLIOTT KATZ:Website: ElliottKatz.comPodcasts:LinkedIn: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elliott.katz.9 Instagram:Twitter:  YouTube: CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: TransformingRelationship.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each month.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#ElliottKatz #strongmen #relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #toxicrelationships#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #difficultconversations
Is positive self-talk always positive? is it effective? Does positive self-talk have any downsides? Can it always work? Important questions, and today's guest, Dr. Marcia Reynolds, has given this a tremendous amount of thought and consideration. Such valuable work! Dr. Reynolds says, "Rationalizing and defending your behavior keeps you nestled in a safe and suffocating world. Mustering the courage to say, "Yes!" in the face of fear is a great gift to give yourself." (from her book, OutSmart Your Brain: How to Manage Your Mind When Emotions Take the Wheel. In today's episode, we talk about conversations with yourself and with others that demonstrate respect, and positive intentions. Why is that so important? Find out. Listen in. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:What it means to "outsmart your brain"What is "The Discomfort Zone"?Why we often prefer a safe, suffocating worldWhen and why positive self-talk is ineffectiveThree ways to mentally prepare for a difficult conversationWhat's Dr. Reynolds' AID model and how to use it >>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you.ARE YOU--OR, HAVE YOU BEEN--IN A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP WITH A PARTNER, EX, PARENT, OR SIBLING?Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships. All safely off social media, too!___________________________________GUEST: DR. MARCIA REYNOLDS Dr. Marcia Reynolds, Master Certified Coach, is fascinated by the brain, especially what triggers feelings of connection, commitment, and possibility. She draws on her research as she helps people make their difficult conversations become a difference-making experience. She has provided executive coaching, leadership and personal development training programs, and keynote speaking in 41 countries. This highly sought-after behavioral scientist is happily obsessed with uncovering the latest discoveries in neuro/behavioral research and putting them into practical applications. With a doctoral degree in Psychology, and two master’s degrees in Adult Learning and Communications, Marcia’s expertise ranges from holding powerful conversations to activating the emotions of passion and courage at work and at home. Dr. Reynolds is the Training Director for the Healthcare Coaching Institute at Virginia Tech. She was the 5th global president of the International Coach Federation. She is also faculty for the International Coach Academy in Russia and Create China Coaching in China. She is recognized by the Global Gurus as the #3 coach in the world. Interviews and excerpts from Marcia’s books -- Outsmart Your Brain: How to Manage Your Mind When Emotions Take the Wheel; The Discomfort Zone: How Leaders Turn Difficult Conversations into Breakthrough; and Wander Woman: How High-Achieving Women Find Contentment and Direction have appeared in many places including Psychology Today, Fast Company, Forbes.com, The Globe and Mail, and The Wall Street Journal. When you face difficult conversations, Dr. Reynolds can help you flip defensiveness, create rapport, and connect in more meaningful ways. When she has the opportunity to be home, Marcia can often be found hiking the beautiful mountains in Arizona. You can learn more about Dr. Reynolds on her website, www.outsmartyourbrain.comFREE GIFT FROM DR. MARCIA REYNOLDS :ebook: From the Pits to the Peak: A new look at making life changes GET IT HERE.CONTACT INFO FOR DR. MARCIA REYNOLDSWebsite: OutsmartYourBrain.comPodcasts:LinkedIn: @MarciaReynoldsFacebook: @OutsmartYourBrainInstagram: Twitter:  @BMarciaReynoldsYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/MarciaReynoldsCONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: TransformingRelationship.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each month.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #toxicrelationships#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #outsmartyourbrain #drmarciareynolds #positiveselftalk #difficultconversations #preparefordifficultconversation #covisioning
Kids don't always grow out of things. They grow through things!And, you need to be there to see it, understand it, and know what to do to help when things seem to be going sideways! Today's guest, Dr. Brian Licuanan, and I talk about the difficulties in seeing problems kids want to hide from us, whether we're their parent, grandparent, teacher, or coach. It's very confusing to them because their brain development is not equipped to handle so much of it. Yet, they think they should be able to.And, you as a parent, maybe think you should know what to do. You may, but if you're like most parents, you do not. You may have some ideas, but how do you get into the tough conversations with your kid?Often, when you bring up a tough subject like your teen's emotional well-being, you are met with eye-rolling, and a quick escape from the room, right? Don't give up. Today we talk about ways to engage your kid in conversation and about tough things. It's not easy, and it takes perseverance.You may need to get outside help for your family, too. Dr. Licuanan and I talk about this, and how to know when to reach out.Today's episode may be just what you need to answer the questions:"How do I bridge the gap between me and my teen?","What do I need to know about talking with my teen so I can feel helpful rather than feeling helpless?"HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:How to know the difference between enabling, condoning, and actually helping your teenLinks between self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and substance abuseWhat impacts the incidence of eating disordersWhy kids are not accessing mental health services...and, why they need toSIGNS parents need to read that their child might be struggling with addiction or mental health issues How parents can take the proper steps to get a child the help needed>>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you.ARE YOU--OR, HAVE YOU BEEN--IN A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP WITH A PARTNER, EX, PARENT, OR SIBLING? Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships. All safely off social media, too!___________________________________GUEST: DR. BRIAN LICUANANDr. Brian Licuanan is an addiction and mental health specialist who serves as the primary therapist at premiere treatment centers, A Better Life Recovery and A Mission for Michael, treating clients with complex mental health disorders and their co-morbidities which often includes substance abuse disorders. Additionally, he successfully treats clients struggling with anxiety, depression, stress management, PTSD, ADHD, and a variety of other severe mood disorders. Furthermore, Dr. Licuanan integrates Solution-Focused, Positive Psychology/Strength-Based, and Motivational Therapies into his treatment planning with clients. Dr. Licuanan received his Ph.D and M.S from the University of Oklahoma and his M.A. from Pepperdine University.Realizing over 80% of his clients experience sleep deficiency, exacerbating their medical and psychological conditions, he specializes in treating sleep problems through Cognitive Behavioral Treatment for Insomnia (CBT-I) which is known to cure insomnia and has proven to be a highly effective course of treatment for those wanting to stop using sleep medications.Dr. Licuanan’s M.S in Industrial/Organizational Psychology–a specialized field of study dealing with workplace issues including leadership, work culture, motivation and job satisfaction, allows him to integrate this specialty into treatment for his clients struggling with career-related concerns. He also has helped coach various levels of executives and management on team-building and performance enhancement. Additionally, with his competition background in sports and as an active martial arts competitor, Dr. Licuanan has assisted numerous client athletes develop competitive mindsets, work through mental blocks, increase match readiness, and elevate their performance potentials. Personally, Dr. Licuanan is passionate about educating communities on mental health and addiction and volunteers as lead facilitator for the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) specifically helping families in crisis strategize ways to get loved ones into treatment. Dr. Licuanan has been featured several times on the television talk show The Doctors and is asked to present regularly within the mental health community on addiction, ways to get highly acute clients into treatment, insomnia and sleep strategies.FREE GIFT FROM DR. BRIAN LICUANAN :Not at this time. CONTACT INFO FOR DR. BRIAN LICUANAN:Website: ABetterLifeRecovery.comPodcasts:LinkedIn: Facebook: @ABetterLifeRecoveryInstagram: @ABetterLifeRecoveryTwitter:  @BetterRecoveryYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKQs4iIknPHsdypD6EdgfvQCONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: TransformingRelationship.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each month.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #toxicrelationships#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #helpfortroubledteens #troubledteens #teendepression #teenbullying #DrBrianLicuanan #teensmentalhealth #eatingdisorder #teensubstanceabuse
Wow! Does thinking of yourself as being UNSTOPPABLE light you up? Then, you'll love today's episode! Connie Phieff was adopted--but she didn't know it until later in life--and lived her young life a bit like Cinderella. Now, you know that's not good, right? Cook, clean, take care of the kids, repeat!How Connie overcame the pain of her past toxic life to go on and create such amazing accomplishments is inspirational. She became a leader in the community and in her own life in every way.Yes, not only did she come from a toxic home, but she went on--as most of us do--to marry a toxic person. Oh, no, that didn't stop her, either. That's where she really started developing her recipe for lemonade from all the lemons in life. She knew she needed to cleanse the negativity from life if she wanted the life she envisioned. AND, she did it!Listen as she shares her story, her vulnerabilities, her tears, and her learning. All this propelled her to the amazing successes she has now!HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:Why what happened to you in your young life does not have to define your adult lifeWhat it takes to turn those lemons into lemonade and succeedHow adoption and alienation played into Connie's young lifeHow you can find the confidence to live fullyThree top things that make you unstoppable...according to Connie Pheiff>>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you. ARE YOU--OR, HAVE YOU BEEN--IN A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP WITH A PARTNER, EX, PARENT, OR SIBLING? Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships!GUEST: CONNIE PHEIFFFrom cleaning houses to filling houses, Connie Pheiff, Philanthropist, Social Venture Entrepreneur, and #BeyondMeToo Activist is the Jewel in the Crown of the Pheiff Group, Inc. With her distinctive voice audiences everywhere know her.She is blessed from her work as a corporate CEO, award-winning speaker, Podcaster, Mentor, Coach, and author. She is provocative, edgy, and brings a genuine humor to the platform.Connie is best known as the Unstoppable DIVA; Former Corporate Executive tuned Media Industrialist. Since founding the Pheiff Group, Inc. in 2007, she has become a Social Venture Entrepreneur, producer, and host of the Connie Pheiff Show; and founder of Talent Concierge, representing the World’s most daring minds. She has authored five business books, and coming soon is her most powerful book yet, about her Unstoppable life. She is the former CEO of Girl Scouts of Penn’s Woods Council, Recipient of the Community Leadership Award (2016); and most recently received the Inspirational Woman in Media Award (2019); and Finalist for the 2018 Indie Author Legacy Award. Insights Success Magazine calls her “a symbol of Exemplary Entrepreneurship.” Connie always shares a bit of herself; a life of spectacularly epic fails. Through it all, her success hasn’t come in spite of her failures, but because of them.FREE GIFT FROM CONNIE PHEIFF : Connie is happy to give you an autographed copy of her book, Marketing Masters. If you'd like to have one, email Connie at Connie@PhieffGroup.com CONTACT INFO FOR CONNIE PHIEFF:Website: talent.concierge.coPodcasts:LinkedIn: @ConniePheiffFacebook:Connie.PheiffInstagram:@talentconcierge.coTwitter:  @ConniePheiffYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKQs4iIknPHsdypD6EdgfvQCONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: TransformingRelationship.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each month.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #toxicrelationships#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #beunstoppable #ConniePheiff #overcomingobstacles
Got Empathy? That's one key that unlocks the willingness to enter into a problem-solving process with your partner, according to today's guest, Dr. James. L. Creighton. You need more! Dr. Creighton says: "Empathy allows us to enter into the emotional reality of our loved ones, so that even when there are differences, there is still shared experience." In today's episode, I'm asking how to keep that 'shared experience' loving, kind, and helpful. It takes willingness, skill, finesse, and interest to keep a relationship strong and growing. Dr. Creighton has been married for a very long time. He openly shares the good and not-so-good moments, and how he and his wife have weathered the difficult ones. His recent book, Loving Through Your Differences, draws on the latest research in cognitive science and developmental psychology to show how we invent our realities with our perceptual minds. He offers clear, concrete tools for shifting perceptions and reframing responses, with the result that couples move out of the fear and alienation of "your way or my way" and into a deep understanding of the other that allows for an "our way." HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:Why the ability to reframe is important to loving through your differencesHow Dr. Creighton's Five Minute Rule helps let off steamImportant steps in the problem-solving process that can't be missedHow to get past not agreeing with each other Do we have to share an "emotional reality" in order to stay together? >>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you. Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships!GUEST: JAMES L. CREIGHTON, PhDJames L. Creighton, PhD, is the author of Loving Through Your Differences. A psychologist and relationship consultant, he has worked with couples and conducted communications training for more than fifty years. Creighton recently developed and conducted couples conflict training for several hundred professional staff of the Thailand Department of Mental Health, based on a new Thai translation of his book, How Loving Couples Fight. He has taught throughout North America as well as in Korea, Japan, Israel, Brazil, Egypt, Russia, and the Republic of Georgia. FREE GIFT FROM JAMES CREIGHTON : Not at this time.CONTACT INFO FOR JAMES CREIGHTON:Website: JamesLCreighton.comPodcasts:LinkedIn: Facebook:Instagram: Twitter:  @NewWorldLibraryYouTube: CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: TransformingRelationship.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each month.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #personalwholeness#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #newworldlibrary
Dating? Is it a joy, a pleasure, a pain, or a concern? Sometimes, it's each of those, right? And, sometimes, it's just downright scary! If you've had past relationship with toxic people, or toxic relationships in your family, friends, or at work, you'll find this episode valuable. We also talk about the issues that come up when dating after divorce, AND, the ever popular subject of online dating. My guest today, Laura Richer says, "I focus on dating and romantic relationships and it is my belief that difficult relationships and people are optional. When we continually attract difficult situations to us, we must first start with doing our own inner work and see what we can do to shift this experience. I help clients cultivate self-love and self-respect so that they can attract joyous and fulfilling relationships into their lives, not difficult people and situations."HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:What "authentic connection" isHow to know when you've made oneHow your self-worth affects your dating effectivenessHow you can stop attracting undesirable peopleWhy focusing on the potential of a relationship is dangerous >>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you. Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships!GUEST: LAURA RICHER Laura Richer is a certified Hypnotherapist, Life Coach, and Reiki practitioner, and the owner of Richer Healing Hypnosis, Rieki, and Life Coaching in Seattle, Washington. She is a graduate of Western Washington University. Laura is currently completing her Master's Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling at Antioch University. Her Hypnotherapy and Coaching practice over the last eight plus years has specialized in supporting clients in building confidence and self-worth so that they can attract the relationship they truly desire. FREE GIFT FROM L:AURA RICHER : Not at this time.CONTACT INFO FOR LAURA RICHER: Website: DRicherLove.comPodcasts:LinkedIn: Linkedin.com/in/laura-richer-93419658Facebook: Facebook.com/CoachLauraRicherInstagram: @richer_loveTwitter: YouTube: CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: ForRelationshipHelp.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos, or attend my webinars. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each moth.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#midlifedating #afraidtoloveagain #trustingagain #midliferelationshipissues #drmargaretrutherford#relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #personalwholeness#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse
Are you a little shy about dating, or moving into a new relationship after a divorce? What if you've been married once or twice? Do you have confidence to date again? Do you have confidence in choosing a new partner after divorce? OK! Yes, there are a few fear-inspiring issues about dating again after a divorce, right? Can I trust a new person?Can I trust myself?Will you see red flags?When am I ready for emotional intimacy? When do I consider moving to the bedroom and sexual intimacy?What do I need to talk about to help a new partner understand me?When do I talk about my past relationships? Oh, yes! A few things to consider, for sure. That's why this fabulous conversation with Dr. Margaret Rutherford is so valuable--and practical--for you to listen to right now...and to share with your friends who are thinking about dating again. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:What you need to discuss with a new partnerWhen is the right time to talk about your past relationshipsHow to approach dating again, especially after a difficult, toxic relationshipAging is real. How to talk about all that.What about boundaries?How do you solve problems in a new relationship >>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you. Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships!GUEST: DR. MARGARET RUTHERFORDDr. Margaret Rutherford, a clinical psychologist, has practiced for twenty-six years in Fayetteville, Arkansas., Her work can be found at DrMargaretRutherford.com, where she blogs weekly, as well as HuffPost, Psych Central, The Mighty, the Gottman Blog and others. She hosts a weekly podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Her new book, Perfectly Hidden Depression, will be published by New Harbinger in 2019.Dr. Margaret as she's known to her followers decided to extend the walls of her practice almost 7 years ago and now blogs and podcasts about her ideas on depression, perfectionism and its antidote -- vulnerability. Her podcast has earned more than half a million downloads as people are tuning in to learn more about therapy and what makes real change happen.FREE GIFT FROM DR. RUTHERFORD: Not at this time.CONTACT INFO FOR DR. MARGARET RUTHERFORD Website: DrMargaretRutherford.comPodcasts:LinkedIn: Facebook: Facebook.com/DrMargaretRutherfordInstagram: DrMargaretRutherfordTwitter: YouTube: CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: ForRelationshipHelp.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos, or attend my webinars. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each moth.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#midlifedating #afraidtoloveagain #trustingagain #midliferelationshipissues #drmargaretrutherford #relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #personalwholeness#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse
Sometimes, we learn out greatest lessons by going through terrible pain and trauma.It's never "worth it," in my opinion. But, it does change us, and can be the catalyst for our insights and growth. So, in that sense, we can be grateful for it.How that change shows up is in our attitude, understanding, and often in the quality of help we get to heal.You may find some sad similarities in what Joy shares with the story of your relationship with a #Hijackal. For instance:Do you feel imprisoned?Held hostage?Physically abused?Drugged?Joy shares her story and insights about moving through and past these terrible experiences in order to have a fulfilling life.Her journey through pain to a rich life with an amazing, supportive partner is inspiring. Today, we also talk about her long-time partner, love, and husband, and their cross-cultural marriage...and, all the learning she has to offer. See the highlights below!NOTE: I need to put a WORD in here: In my opinion, not everything that Joy shares May be directly applicable to your relationships with #Hijackals. Think about that, and ask me if you're wondering, by joining in at OptimizeCircles.com in the discussion threads. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:how fear is an important factor to look deeply into for your healingwhy it is essential to reconnect with yourself at deep levelshow to find compassion, love, and wisdom to have it work for youlearning to let go, and the results it createsthe learning curve of marrying into a different culture...and, the joysJoy's transformational process>>>>> Don't miss all the good stuff at the bottom of this page for you. Join my OptimizeCircles.com and get the insights and support you want--safely off social media and it works just like Facebook! Many other free & low-cost resources to help your relationships!GUEST: JOY IDRIES,Joy Idries certainly knows from personal experience how to move beyond struggle, fear, suffering and pain in her life and relationships to lasting freedom, happiness and joy. Her forthcoming book, “Goodbye Suffering Hello Joy” describes her experience of coming through various abusive relationships and the after effects of decades of chronic and life-threatening illness and how it is possible for others to move through it too. The moment she moved out of suffering and found her joy was when her ‘WHY’ was born, to help many thousands break free from the chains of suffering, to unleash their own true freedom and joy.Her deep experiential wisdom and expertise as a therapeutic counsellor, international Inner Journey facilitator and spiritual teacher serve perfectly in enabling others to create a radical shift for themselves and their relationships, right from the inside out. FREE GIFT FROM JOY:Read her ebook, How to 'Be' in a Relationship: Taking a deeper look at what relationship issues are all about, HERECONTACT INFO FOR JOY IDRIESWebsite: TrulyTransformational.co.ukPodcasts:LinkedIn: @JoyIdriesFacebook: Facebook.com/TrulyTransformationalInstagram: Twitter: @LightanjoyYouTube: CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:Website: ForRelationshipHelp.comFacebook: RelationshipHelpDoctorTwitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerInstagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPinterest: Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerWANT TO ASK ME QUESTIONS AND HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO ME IN MY SECRET (Off Facebook) GROUPS?Be first to get my videos, or attend my webinars. Even, two group Ask Me Anything calls each moth.You can. Join my Optimize Circles! CLICK HERE And, get my 21 Steps to Empowered Emotional Savvy via email FREE!Free Passive-Aggressive ChecklistFree Relationship ChecklistSubscribe to Dr. Shaler's newsletter, Tips for RelationshipsFREE ebook: How to Spot a Hijackal®If you have not worked with Dr. Shaler before, you can have your first one-hour session for only $97.#childhoodtrauma #emotionalneeds #trulytransformational #joyidries #crossculturalmarriage#relationshipadvice #Hijackals #toxicpeople #RhobertaShaler #healthyrelationship #personalwholeness#narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse
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