Infertility Crossroads

I’ve been seeing in Facebook groups recently comments about how people who are choosing to use donor eggs, donor sperm, or donor embryo don’t want to tell their kids they are donor conceived. To be very clear - I 1000% believe that not telling your children or future children they are donor conceived is not an option and if you feel that way then donor conception is not for you. What I do talk about on today's episode is that a lot of these feelings come from fear and shame and when we work through those feelings, it makes all the difference. Join me as we talk about these hard feelings, how you can navigate them and work through them so, if you decide donor is the right path for you, you will be excited and confident talking about your child(s) conception story. Resources from this Episode: Episode 36: Lindsay's Story: Being Donor Conceived and an Advocate for Donor Conceived People Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

March is Surrogacy Awareness Month and what better way to kick off the month is this episode all about surrogacy! Today I'm joined by surrogacy expert and mom via surrogacy, Jessie Jaskulsky. Jessie experienced the devastating loss of her son at 22 weeks pregnant which led to secondary infertility and learning about her inability to carry a pregnancy to term. She chose surrogacy as the route to build her family and with the help of two beautiful surrogates she now has her two daughters. Jessie now owns Surrogacy Simplified where she helps her clients navigate all the different elements of surrogacy and helps relieve some of the stress that comes with this path to parenthood. Jessie and I dive into all things infertility, surrogacy, what to consider when thinking about this path, and talk about resources available for you. Connect with Jessie: Free e-book Complimentary consultation with Jessie  Website: https://surrogacysimplified.com/ Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

It's been all over the news and spreading through the infertility community online. The Alabama Supreme Court ruled that embryos have the same rights as children. In the episode today, I'm getting pretty raw and personal about my feelings on this topic. I am sharing my frustrations and speaking out about my opinions and what I think. I'm also sharing what we can do about this. It can feel like nothing but the reality is there is a lot you and I can do to make a change and difference. This is a raw and real episode but one I think is incredibly important to share. Resources from the Show: Read the Alabama Supreme Court Ruling Resolve New England's Instagram Post Natalie Crawford, MD post on the decision How you can get involved Sign-up for RESOLVE Federal Advocacy Day In Minnesota? Join us to get infertility insurance Find out what is happening in your state through RESOLVE Doctors for Fertility RESOLVE: Fight for Families Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

Today I'm sharing 4 things you should consider or keep in mind when you are thinking about or planning to switch fertility clinics. There are a lot of reasons to switch: maybe it's not feeling quite right, maybe you want a second opinion, maybe you are moving and need to find a new provider. Regardless, keep these 4 tips in mind. Remember: I'm not a doctor or a medical professional, these are my own opinions and thoughts. For any medical advice please talk to your personal provider. Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

How many times has someone said "let me know how I can help!" and you've been left thinking..."thanks but I have NO idea how you can help". Today on the show I'm giving you 9 responses you can say when people ask how they can help you or how they can support you while you are trying to build your family. Some of these ideas may resonate with you. Some may not. What I want you to walk away with is this - ASK for the help you need. Your loved ones who you’ve confided in WANT to help you - otherwise they woudln’t have asked. It’s a win-win - you get what will help you and they feel good about contributing and making you feel better. Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

I didn’t realize until recently how important knowing where you came from was. I’m not donor conceived. I have had the privilege to grow up and be around my family. I had heard from donor conceived people how important that was or how jarring of an experience it was to not be around people genetically connected to them but I had never really connected the dots. I’ll never know what it really feels like because that is not my experience. However, I did have an experience in my recent past that I think gave me some insight into what this could be like for my girls. On the episode today I'm sharing with you the experience I had and how it has shaped my view of having contact with or being able to help your children or future children contact their donor. Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with Meta on ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠

Today we're exploring the power of advocacy within the infertility community. In the politically charged U.S., I won't dive into politics, but let's discuss supporting bills and laws for positive change. After overcoming my fears, participating in Resolve's Advocacy Day in May 2023 empowered me, showcasing that anyone can make a difference with zero experience. Infertility often strips us of control, leaving us feeling powerless. Engaging in advocacy not only helps regain control but also contributes to increased happiness and wellbeing. Even if you're not comfortable sharing your story publicly, you can discreetly support bills that matter to you through Resolve Advocacy. Resources from this Episode: Schoolhouse Rock Video Infertility Crossroads: Episode 32 How to Restore Your Sense of Control When You Feel Powerless Sign up for Resolve Advocacy Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with Meta on ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠

This week we are diving into a topic we can all relate to - feeling left out. I share some personal stories of feeling left out and how those feelings get exacerbated while we are struggling to build our families. I also share with you why we say “my feelings are hurt” and what is actually happening in our brains when we are left out of events, groups, or life events - like everyone around us having babies and we are not. At the end, I will give you 4 easy strategies you can use to help you navigate these feelings that you can implement right away. Resources from this Episode: How Your Brain Processes Rejection Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with Meta on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

Today, we're diving into a topic many of you have messaged me about—secondary infertility and the decision to pursue donor conception for a second child. It's a journey filled with complexities and considerations. In this episode, we explore key questions: How does bonding differ with a donor-conceived child? Will your second pregnancy be different? How to talk to your biological child about their half-sibling? Plus, we touch on potential family and social perceptions. It's a quick but insightful guide for those at the crossroads of secondary infertility and donor conception. Resources from this Episode: 7 Common Reasons for Secondary Infertility Episode 5: Five Ways to Come To Terms With Using a Donor Meta's Recommended Books on Donor Conception

Today I’m joined by Miraya Gran, a fertility warrior and patient advocate who has taken her fertility story and brought it to the Minnesota State Capitol! Miraya and her husband have gone through multiple treatments and eventually had their daughter but not without a lot of heartache and costs. Miraya shares her story, her passion for helping others as they navigate their infertility journey and her deep commitment to brining insurance coverage to all Minnesotans who need it for their infertility diagnosis. We also dive deep into the Minnesota Building Families Act that is currently going through the Minnesota Legislature. We talk about the bill, what it would provide for Minnesotans and how you can get involved either here in Minnesota or in advocacy and legislation in your own state. This is a must not miss episode! Links Mentioned in the Episode: Sign up for RESOLVE Action Network emails Register for MN Advocacy Day February 14, 2024 Minnesota Building Families Coalition on Instagram Minnesota Building Families Coalition on Facebook The Minnesota Building Families Act Reproductive Outcomes for Survivors of Childhood Cancer - National Library of Medicine RESOLVE Infertility Statistics RESOLVE State Advocacy Toolkit Connect with Meta on ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

It’s been a while since I published a podcast and today I’m revealing to you why! In May 2023, I realized that I was heading down a path of severe burnout. Life was a lot and I needed to make a hard decision - to step aside from some of the things I loved to find space to rest, relax and heal. It is hard to recognize burnout in ourselves or to admit that we need a break. Especially from fertility treatments. But taking the opportunity to slow down, say no more than yes, and to reclaim who you are and what your goals are can be a game changer. Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

Today we dive into the fascinating world of egg quality as it relates to your fertility and you’ll walk away with five things you can start doing today to improve your egg quality. Our egg counts are going down by the month, even from the moment we are born. For some of us we have more eggs than we could ever imagine needing or using. For others, like myself, we don’t have enough eggs and the ones we have are crap. We also never learn about our eggs, how to protect them and help their quality and what we can do to support our own egg quality. Enter today’s episode. We are talking about why egg quality is important, and what we can do to support the eggs we have. My guest today is Claire Innes. Claire is a fertility coach who helps burned out action takers conceive and carry heathy babies using the things they can control - food, hormones, lifestyle. I love Claire’s approach - she is no nonsense yet kind and loving in a way that will make you want to take action. Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

Today on the show we are talking about genetic grief as it relates to egg donation. At the core of who we are, when we are not able to conceive a child using our own DNA or our partner’s DNA there is a deep sense of loss. One that can only be described as grief. But it can be so hard to manage when going through infertility because a lot of time that grief is not validated by those around us because they don’t understand it. Society understands what it is like to grieve the loss of a loved one but the idea of genetic grief is one that is not as mainstream and a lot harder to understand…until you are in it. Sarah Reece joins me on this episode to share her experience with genetic grief and to guide us through the concept of genetic grief: what is it, how do we cope with it and why it is so important to befriend your grief to move through it. Connect with Sara on Instagram at @‌opentolife_sarahreece or on her website www.opentolife.net. You can also find Sara on her podcast, Navigating Infertility. Grab Sara's free resource, Instant Calm, a free audio practice to help you reduce the stress of infertility in minutes. Gain access to 2 x scientifically proven practices that clear your mind and calm your nervous system, enabling you to combat anxiety and experience more peace instantly! https://instantcalm.opentolife.net/download

So often we think that self advocacy is finding a different doctor or speaking up when we have questions and those are true but there is SO much more to being able to advocate for yourself during your infertility journey. On today’s episode I’m joined by Lucy Lines, a clinically experienced embryologist and award winning IVF coach. Through her 17 years working in the fertility industry and her passion for helping people through IVF, Lucy has seen it all when it comes to labs, embryo grading, IVF protocols, you name it. She shares with us the importance of having an independent review of your personal results, shares how to find the information specific to your story and journey (hint…not everything is for everyone!), and talks about what it really looks like to advocate for yourself as you navigate becoming a parent. Lucy is someone I wish I had in my corner during my journey to becoming a parent and I’m thrilled to share her with you today. About Lucy: As a fully trained and clinically experienced embryologist Lucy has had the good fortune to travel the world practicing her craft in IVF labs in Australia, Sweden, Ireland and the UK. Over her first 17 years in the fertility ‘industry’ she became increasingly frustrated over the ‘business’ aspect that was creeping in to the large IVF companies and the huge gaps that was creating for patients accessing those services. After a redundancy at 37 weeks pregnant, (and at 44 years of age) Lucy saw an opportunity to fill those gaps - with education, care, support, guidance and space for women and couples experiencing difficulties with their fertility - totally independent of the big businesses! She now offer my services as an independent embryologist through Two Lines Fertility - with her signature program ‘IVFWTF’, her website and blog, e-courses and, of course, 1:1 support. She now helps women and couples to feel empowered, and more importantly EDUCATED and in control of their fertility, whether they are right at the beginning of considering growing their families, in the depths of IVF treatment, or anywhere in between. Website: https://www.twolinesfertility.com.au/ Instagram Facebook Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

If you’ve been trying for a baby and you feel like life has thrown some tough punches at you, you are not alone. Infertility is heartbreaking and frustrating especially when you keep trying with no success. Through each of these failures, each doctor’s appointment, and as time ticks on it can feel like you are losing control. Control over what is happening to your body, how you spend your time, how you spend your money, and even how you relate to your partner. The truth is there are ways for you to regain some of that control to help you navigate your path to becoming a parent in the best way for you. On the episode today, I’m joined by Laura Watson. Laura is a fertility coach and fellow donor egg mama who supports women who are suffering for infertility. Using mind body techniques and connecting to who you are as a person, she gives us six great ways to take back control of your life and your fertility. Laura Watson is a fertility coach and mom to her two donor conceived children. Her personal journey included failed fertility treatments, several unsuccessful rounds of IVF, and three heartbreaking pregnancy losses before completing her family with donor egg IVF.  She now supports women pursuing fertility treatments to build their families and helps them find control, confidence and joy in a complicated process. Connect with Laura: Instagram Website: www.positivefertilitycoaching.com Laura's article: My Journey from Infertility to Motherhood Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

Today is part 2 of my two part series with Jennifer Robertson. If you missed part 1, make sure to go back and check it out 39. Jennifer’s Story: Two Paths to Parenthood Through Surrogacy and Pregnancy. In our conversation on this episode we are switching gears away from Jennifer’s personal story and talking about the work Jennifer does with her coaching clients, specifically around pregnancy after infertility and loss. So often when we are struggling to have a baby we feel like all our problems will go away when we finally achieve pregnancy. The reality is that once you become pregnant post-infertility or post-pregnancy loss, a whole new set of feelings, fears, pain, and grief starts to show up. Jennifer is an expert in this area and she dives into the most common struggles women face after becoming pregnant post-infertility or pregnancy loss, how to navigate miscarriage and loss, the importance of finding a community of people who get it, and what resources are available to you. This is a tough episode as we touch on some hard and painful topics but I’m so grateful to Jennifer for her willingness to step into the hard and provide support for those who need it. Connect with Jennifer: Your Pregnancy Haven https://www.yourpregnancyhaven.co/ Website: https://www.jenniferrobertson.co/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/msjenniferrobertson/ Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

In this heartfelt episode Meta delves into Jennifer Robertson's inspiring journey of resilience and determination in her quest to build her dream family. Just when she least expected it, Jennifer found herself facing the challenging reality of infertility, longing to experience the joy of carrying a pregnancy while simultaneously exploring the possibilities of surrogacy. Jennifer openly shares the highs and lows, twists and turns she encountered along the way. Through her candid narrative, you will gain insight into the rollercoaster of emotions, the decisions, and the love that propelled her forward on this extraordinary path to motherhood. Discover how Jennifer overcame obstacles and embraced hope when she decided to use a surrogate to bring her cherished son into the world. Her account of the surrogate journey is one of hope, resilience, and the unbreakable bond that forms between a mother and her child, regardless of who carries the pregnancy. Jennifer will leave you in awe as she reveals how, against all odds, she welcomed her second child, a beautiful daughter, through conceiving on her own and carrying the pregnancy herself. It's a testament to the power of hope and the inexplicable wonders life can bestow upon us. Whether you are facing infertility, considering surrogacy, or yearning to carry a pregnancy, this episode will touch your heart and leave you inspired. This is part one of a a two part series. Stay tuned next week for part 2 where we dive more into Jen’s coaching work and how she now works with women at all different stages of their fertility and pregnancy journeys. Connect with Jennifer Robertson: Website:  https://www.yourfertilityhaven.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/msjenniferrobertson/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/425418404879458 Did your doctor just tell you that you need to use a donor? Or, you think donor might be on the horizon but you are not sure yet? Or, you already know you need to use a donor but you want some more help processing the idea. Go to ⁠https://metagetman.com/crossroads ⁠to get a free copy of my guide "My Doctor Just Said Donor, Now What?" Connect with me on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠

Holy smokes! We've published 37 episodes and wow am I proud. When I first started this podcast I was worried I wouldn't have enough content to get through 5 episodes and here we are! Summer is here which means I'm taking a break from the podcast for the next few months. Don't worry though! I already have 5 episodes ready to drop in the fall to kick of Season 2 of Infertility Crossroads. In the meantime, go back and listen to some of your favorites. Or maybe there are episodes on topics that felt too hard to listen to when they first came out but you are in a different place now and ready to hear them. And, I'll still be available on Instagram or my website for the summer so I'm not going to far. Lastly...if you have an idea for an episode, email me at hello@metagetman.com and let me know! Any feedback you have is greatly appreciated. Happy Summer! Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help. Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide https://www.metagetman.com/podcast

This episode is all about the friends and family who are supporting you on your fertility journey. It’s one I created for you to SHARE with others. Infertility is incredibly hard, isolating, and lonely. Most people who have never been through it don’t understand. So the burden to educate falls on us, those who are struggling. On the episode today I’m sharing five tips for our friends, family, neighbors, co-workers, anyone in your life who is walking along side you on this journey but hasn’t been through it themselves. I’m telling them the things you wish you could say but don’t know how. Listen to the episode, then share it with anyone you want to so they can be better and more supportive for you.  Resources from this episode:  1 in 6 People Globally Affected by Infertility New Research on Stress and Infertility Connect with me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/metagetman/ Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help. Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide https://www.metagetman.com/podcast

In this episode, I’m chatting with Lindsay Blount. Lindsay learned that she was donor conceived as an adult.  Through this information, Lindsay has been learning what it means for her, her children and her family.   Through her experience, Lindsay has become an advocate for the rights of donor conceived people and has worked hard to help educate recipient parents about the donor conceived experience (through her lens).  Lindsay is one of those people who offers her viewpoints and life stories in a way that makes it easier for you to comprehend her perspective and story. She is approachable, straight forward and is a donor conceived person who I’ve learned a lot from.  While Lindsay shares her own, personal perspective and does not speak for all DCP, she shares a lot about her own story, sharing with your child that they are DCP, discusses terminology that she uses and uses with her own children, talks about the rights of DCP and how when we are centered and focused on the DCP experience we all win.  Covered in this episode: The importance of sharing with your children that they are donor conceived How Lindsay learned she was donor conceived and how that has impacted her life and the life of her family.  Her relationship with her siblings Terms to describe the donor / biological parent  Rights of donor conceived people and why they are important Focusing on what is best for your child is how we are all on the same team  Lindsay shares a mix of personal and donor conceived content on her Instagram page.  In addition, she has two really great posts on her page to check out: Lindsay's thoughts on her dad who raised her Lindsay's experience with her siblings  Connect with Meta on Instagram  Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help. Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide https://www.metagetman.com/podcast