Love, Unboxed. For the Hopeful Romantic

How to Stop Falling for Potential: 5 Ways to Avoid Relationship MudHave you ever stayed too long in a relationship because you believed in who your partner could be instead of who they were? You’re not alone. In this episode, Dr. Colleen Mullen explores the painful but common trap of “falling for potential”—and how to step out of it for good.Drawing on personal experience, client stories, and research like Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love, Dr. Colleen explains why chasing chemistry and promise often blinds us to the reality in front of us. You’ll learn:Why it’s easy to give great relationship advice to friends but ignore red flags in your own lifeHow to recognize when you’re stuck in “relationship mud”Five strategies to reset your approach, including setting clear standards, walking away early, spotting love bombing, journaling for reality checks, and prioritizing compatibility over chemistryWhether you’re dating, starting something new, or reflecting on past relationships, this episode is packed with insight and practical steps to help you choose better, sooner.Resources Mentioned:Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (Dr. Colleen’s guided journal)Upcoming Dating Workshop- How to Date Differently (Nov 2025) — join the waitlist  & my mailing list at DrColleenMullen.com  More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

🧠💛 Loving Someone with ADHD isn’t about fixing them — it’s about understanding them. In this episode of Love, Unboxed, Dr. Colleen breaks down what it looks like to love and support a partner with ADHD. She shares her own late diagnosis and how treatment helped her reframe shame into strategy — a powerful reminder that ADHD doesn’t mean broken. It just means different. All of a sudden, there was a reason for the clumsiness, always running late, taking things too personally, or never really hitting the mark of her goals. She realized life could be different. She tells how the symptoms can present through the story of Ellen and Justin, and shares how you can support your partner with ADHD. In this episode, we explore the misunderstood symptoms, emotional toll, and what it means to show up with empathy without losing yourself in the process. 🎧 If you’ve ever felt unseen in your relationship — or wondered why your partner’s attention, follow-through, or emotional regulation seems unpredictable — this episode is for you. 👉 Subscribe now so you never miss an episode, and leave your relationship dilemma or drama as a voicemail at loveunboxedpodcast.com. Your story might inspire the next episode. More Resources from Dr. Colleen  - My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break. - Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com.  Upcoming Workshops  "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles.  "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.    SUPPORT THE SHOW!  1. AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase. 2. TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community! Disclaimer This show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.   - Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  -   Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S.  1. Therapy Den 2. Psychology Today 3. Mental Health Matters 4. Therapy for Black Girls 5. Dial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area. 6. The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help.   Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe

EPISODE 10: “Me, You, and the Friend I Can’t Stand: Navigating Tension with Your Partner’s Bestie”Do you feel like your partner’s friend never liked you, and it’s only gotten more awkward over time?You’re not imagining it, and you’re definitely not alone.In this episode of Love, Unboxed, I answer a listener’s question about how to handle a long-standing strain with her husband’s close friend—a man who seems to dislike her and has a way of making group gatherings uncomfortable. She likes his girlfriend, enjoys game nights with friends, and doesn’t want to make waves... but Tom's behavior continues to get under her skin.It’s a dilemma I hear often: What do you do when you don’t get along with your partner’s best friend?Together, we’ll unbox:Why this dynamic happens more often than we admit.The real emotional toll of being the “bigger person”.How confirmation bias, territorial friendships, triangulation, and social identity theory all play a role.Two real-world examples—one that ended in resentment, and one that sparked positive change.Five therapist-approved tools to protect your emotional safety and talk to your partner without conflict.You’ll also hear me (lovingly) roast my brother Frank as an example of confirmation bias—because yes, being a lifelong Dallas Cowboys fan is a personality trait in our family.🔧 Relationship Tools You'll Learn:How to name exactly what bothers youHow to talk to your partner (not vent—strategize)How to create healthy boundaries around social eventsWhy being “the gracious one” shouldn’t mean emotional burnoutHow to tell if this is just irritation—or something deeper🎙 Whether you’re Marie or someone navigating a similar situation, this episode will help you feel less alone and more empowered.🧠 Research Referenced:Confirmation Bias: Nickerson, R.S. (1998)Friendship Processes: Fehr, B. (2004)Structural Family Therapy: Minuchin, S. (1974)Triangulation Theory: Bowen, M. (1978)Social Identity Theory: Tajfel & Turner (1979)💌 Submit your own relationship question at:LoveUnboxedPodcast.com🎧 Listen on: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | wherever you get your podcasts💛 If you liked this episode, please subscribe, share, and leave a review. It means so much and helps more hopeful romantics find us.  More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Episode 9:  Ted:  How Soon is Too Soon to Tell someone How You Feel? Segment 1: Why This Question Hits So HardSo I know I’ve been in those feelings before and had to consider how to handle it.Have you? Timing is everything in love... and also completely out of our control.We live in a culture of swipe fatigue and dating app burnout, where emotional intimacy is often delayed, feared, or even ghosted. So when you do catch feelings early—especially if you are who’s emotionally mature, maybe even a bit relationship weary—it can feel like a risk to say so.Having feelings for someone early on is not the problem. It’s what you do with those feelings—and when—that makes all the differenceSegment 2: What the Research SaysResearch in relationship psychology has shown us that the early stages of dating are a cocktail of brain chemistry and attachment triggers. In fact, a study published in The Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that people tend to idealize new romantic partners during the first 3 to 5 dates, due to something called the “halo effect.” This means we often project what we hope someone is, rather than who they actually are.In another study by Two other neurochemicals that appear at higher concentrations when a person is in love are oxytocin and vasopressin. Based on findings from animal research, Prof. Zeki noted that both of these chemical messengers facilitate bonding and are associated with the brain’s reward system.But he also pointed out that in romantic love, a small brain area called the amygdalaTrusted Source becomes deactivated. The amygdala is the part of the brain that coordinates fear responses, helping humans stay safe in potentially dangerous situations.The fact that it becomes deactivated when a person is in love also means that fear responses are dampened.  The researchers also added that the decrease in activity in another brain region — called the frontal cortex — may explain why people can be “blind” to red flags shown by a potential romantic partner as they are falling in love. What does that mean? Those strong feelings may be just as much about your hopes and unmet needs as they are about the actual person in front of you.Add to that, studies in attachment theory show that those with anxious attachment styles may feel compelled to express emotions quickly in the hopes of creating emotional security. Whereas those with avoidant styles may retreat the moment they sense someone else is “catching feelings.”So what’s “too soon” for one person might feel just right—or terrifying—to another.Attachment Styles: Anxious  and avoidant attachment styles.  Segment 3: A Story We All Know Too WellI can't even tell you how many examples I have of people, including myself, who felt strong feelings early on and have either wanted to express them or did.  Im going to share a couple of short stories. Let me tell you about Maya— late 30s, successful in her career, independent, but struggling in love. She met someone on Hinge who seemed different—he texted regularly, made plans, and remembered little details about her day. By date three, Maya felt “something real” and told him, “I think I’m starting to like you.”His response? “Whoa. That’s fast. I’m not sure I’m there yet.”Can you guess what happened next? He pulled back, and Maya spiraled into self-doubt. And then we have John, because, as demonstrated by our caller Ted, guys struggle with this issue too.John is a guy who has a lot going  for him: good-looking, somewhat successful, in touch with his emotions.  He enjoys dating, but his history is that of someone who catches feelings quickly.  The last 3 women he dated for various amounts of weeks or months were hot and heavy, together several days a week, with an expectation of seeing them every weekend, right after the first date. But the longest relationship he’s had in the last 3 years has only been for 4 months.  He doesn’t understand why they fizzle out so fast.  Result: Both feel disappointed that their love lives have left them feeling like they are the cause of the problem.  They aren't, but their thinking needs to change. Segment 4: Feeling vs. RevealingHere’s the reframe I want to offer:It’s never “too soon” to have feelings. But it can be too soon to expect those feelings to be reciprocated—or to use them as a way to define the relationship.It’s okay to say, “I’m enjoying getting to know you,” or “I feel a connection and I’m curious to explore this.” That’s not the same as dropping the L-bomb or asking someone to commit on week two.Ask yourself:Am I saying this to connect, or to control?Do I want to share, or am I hoping this will push the relationship forward? Segment 5: Tips for Navigating Early EmotionsHere’s what I recommend if you’re feeling the itch to tell someone how you feel:Check in with yourself first.Are these feelings rooted in real connection or in hope? Is this about them—or your fantasy of them?Observe their behavior.Are they showing up consistently, engaging emotionally, and treating you with respect? Feelings are mutual—or they’re not—but patterns don’t lie.Use emotionally safe language.Instead of “I have feelings for you,” try “I’m enjoying this and want to keep seeing where it goes.” It opens the door without putting pressure on the other person.Don’t confuse vulnerability with obligation.Sharing how you feel is brave. But it doesn’t mean the other person has to match you on your timeline. Give space for discovery. Segment 6: Call to ActionReal intimacy isn’t built in declarations. It’s built in shared experience, mutual respect, and time.If this conversation resonated with you, I want to hear from you. Head over to Instagram instagram.com/DrColleenMullen and let me know: Have you ever told someone you had feelings "too soon"? What happened?And if you’re loving Love, Unboxed, don’t forget to follow, rate, and share the podcast with someone who needs to hear this message today.Until next time, remember:You don’t have to rush into love to be worthy of it.Trust the process. Let the connection unfold. More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Episode NotesTitle: The Invisible Drift: Staying Connected when Living Busy LivesHost: Dr. Colleen Mullen​Episode Highlights:Understanding the "Invisible Drift": Explore how emotional distance can develop silently in relationships due to daily stressors and routines.​Real-Life Scenario: Meet Maya and Jordan, a couple navigating the challenges of balancing careers, parenting, and maintaining their bond.​Expert Insight: Discover Dr. John Gottman's research on "bids for connection" and their significance in sustaining emotional intimacy.​Actionable Strategies: Implement four practical tools to strengthen your relationship:Establish a 10-minute daily check-in ritual.Exchange thoughtful notes or messages to express appreciation.Redefine date nights to fit your current lifestyle.Utilize weekends intentionally to reconnect.​growthmachine.comEncouragement for Initiators: Gain perspective if you often find yourself initiating connection and learn how to navigate this dynamic constructively.​Resources Mentioned:Dr. John Gottman's research on emotional bids​Connect with Dr. Colleen Mullen:Website: drcolleenmullen.comInstagram: @drcolleenmullenTikTok: @loveunboxedpodcast​Call to Action:If this episode resonated with you, please subscribe to Love Unboxed and leave a review on your preferred podcast platform. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners seeking to enhance their relationships.Until next time, Let's keep hope alive!  More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Show Notes for Episode [Insert Episode Number]: Strengthening a Thriving RelationshipEpisode Title: How to Make a Great Relationship Even BetterSummary:In this episode of Love, Unboxed: The Podcast for the Hopeful Romantic, licensed therapist [Your Name] answers a refreshing question from a listener who's already in a thriving, loving relationship. This couple has strong communication, no arguments, and regularly complements each other—but they want to know what more they can do to strengthen their bond. If you’re in a relationship that’s going well, this episode is for you! [Your Name] shares research-backed tips for deepening connection, enhancing emotional intimacy, and growing as individuals within the partnership.Key Takeaways:Create New Experiences Together: Learn why novelty is crucial in relationships and how trying new things together can release feel-good chemicals, creating lasting memories and strengthening your bond.Deepen Emotional Intimacy: Discover how a weekly emotional check-in can open deeper lines of communication and foster closeness.Practice Rituals of Connection: Simple, consistent rituals like morning coffee or daily walks can be powerful ways to reinforce your relationship.Physical Connection Beyond Intimacy: Explore the importance of affectionate, non-sexual touch in building connection and satisfaction.Celebrate Wins Together: Celebrating each other’s big and small achievements can deepen your relationship, fostering mutual support and appreciation.Keep Growing as Individuals: Personal growth doesn’t just benefit you—it can breathe new life into your relationship.Listener Question:“Hi! My partner and I have been together for [X years]. We get along really well, don’t argue, and have good communication skills. We also make sure to complement each other all the time. Are there any tips or tricks to make our relationship even better?”Resources Mentioned:Journal of Personality and Social Psychology study on new experiences and relationship satisfaction.Dr. John Gottman’s research on rituals of connection.Study from The Journal of Positive Psychology on emotional self-disclosure.Journal of Social and Personal Relationships on affectionate touch and satisfaction.Call to Action:Have a question about love or relationships? Leave us a voicemail, and your question could be featured in an upcoming episode! Don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who could benefit from strengthening their relationship.Follow Us:Instagram: [Insert Instagram Handle]Twitter: [Insert Twitter Handle]Website: [Insert Website Link]Subscribe & Review:If you enjoyed today’s episode, please subscribe, and leave us a review to help us reach more hopeful romantics just like you.Next Episode Teaser:We will explore what it's like to support a partner with ADHD.  More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

"Love Unboxed: How to Support a Partner with Depression"Episode Summary: In this episode of Love Unboxed, Dr. Colleen introduces a special series dedicated to supporting partners with emotional struggles, starting with depression. Through a relatable story of Sally and Johnny, Dr. Colleen unpacks the challenges of maintaining a relationship when one partner is dealing with depression.She explains the signs of depression, how it manifests differently between men and women, and offers practical advice for partners navigating this tough situation. Dr. Colleen also emphasizes the importance of self-care for those supporting a partner with depression, providing four key steps for maintaining balance in the relationship.Key Takeaways:Depression affects millions worldwide and can have a significant impact on relationships.Signs of depression in men often include irritability and withdrawal, as seen in Johnny’s behavior.Supporting a partner with depression involves encouraging professional help, practicing patience, taking care of your own emotional health, and allowing space for breaks from the topic.Self-care is critical when supporting a partner with depression—don’t forget to prioritize your own needs.Long-term treatment for depression often includes therapy and medication management.Tips for Supporting a Partner with Depression:Encourage them to seek professional help.Be patient and understanding, even when depression doesn’t seem to have an obvious cause.Take care of your own emotional health—engage in activities you enjoy and nurture your social connections.Take emotional breaks and allow both yourself and your partner space from focusing solely on their depression.Quotes from Dr. Colleen:"Supporting a partner with depression can be a challenging experience, but by educating yourself, listening, encouraging them to get professional help, being patient, and practicing self-care, you can help your partner through their journey in and out of depressive episodes.""Although depression can be difficult to get through, it is possible for your partner to regain their emotional health and happiness—and I want you to preserve yours at the same time."Listener Engagement: Dr. Colleen is eager to hear your relationship questions! Submit your voicemails at loveunboxpodcast.com for a chance to have your question featured and answered in a future episode.Follow Dr. Colleen on Social Media:Instagram: @DrColleenMullenTikTok: @LoveUnboxPodcastDon’t forget to subscribe to stay updated on future episodes. As the podcast grows, Dr. Colleen hopes to increase the frequency of new releases, so subscribing ensures you won’t miss out!Next Episode: Stay tuned for the next episode in the series, where Dr. Colleen will dive into supporting a partner with anxiety.To my fellow Hopeful Romantics, let's keep hope alive.  These notes were generated by AI.  More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Love Unboxed Podcast: Episode 5   Welcome to the place where relationship topics get unboxed one episode at a time. This episode finds me taking some days off after the holidays.  It's been a tiring couple of months and I was just craving some time alone at home to help me recharge.  Pat of my home life entails caring for my sister, Suzy. Suzy has needs that make her very special. I lovingly say I inherited her in 2018 when our mother passed away. That was a chaotic time.  Even though life has stabilized, it's been a busy few months, so I was needing some time alone.  I mention this because time alone at our own home can really be precious when we don't live alone and keep a similar schedule as our partner.  My household also includes Suzy. For those interested in hearing more about what it was like when I inherited Suzy, you can listen to the Suzy Chronicles episode of Coaching through Chaos Podcast right here. ***** If you have a dating or relationship dilemma you'd like some help with,go to LoveUnboxedPodcast.com and leave me a voicemail with your question.  I can't wait to hear from you! 'Dating After Divorce - Are You Ready?'Welcome to Love Unboxed, the podcast for the hopeful romantic, hosted by Dr. Colleen Mullen, a therapist with over 20 years of experience.Dr. Colleen shares insights on finding and maintaining love based on her years of helping clients navigate relationships. Today's episode is a deep dive into the question: How soon after divorce should you start dating?The UnboxingThe Hopeful Romantic Question of the Week "How do you know  you're ready to date after your divorce?"   This is a complex question with a complex answer. First, we'll review common reasons for divorcing and then Dr. Colleen shares some questions for you to answer.       Common Reasons for Divorce:Unrealistic ExpectationsFrequent arguments or arguing in a different style than your partnerLack of attentionSubstance use problems What to Know Before you Start Dating Again1.  Reflect on the reasons behind your divorce.  Do you know the reason?  If not, why? Dr. Colleen provides food for thought around communication struggles that can infiltrate a marriage.  2.  Determine if you are emotionally available to date.  What is your motive for jumping back into the dating pool?  Be clear about this with yourself and with the people you date. Be able to be O.K. with being alone.  Be able to differentiate between being alone and being lonely.   3.  We explore the impact of betrayal on a person. If you had an affair, do you know what was going on with you that you were able to step outside of your commitment to your partner? If your partner had an affair, how did you process the betrayal,  Is it resolved enough that you won't be leading with distrust or an expectation of betrayal in your next relationship?The Role of Therapy During This TimeTherapy is a great tool during this time. When you are trying to do things in your love life differently than you have in the past, therapy can help because there will be some un-learning to do as you learn new ways to be.  There can be so much growth in the area of self-awareness during a divorce. It's one of Dr. Colleen's favorite times to work with her clients - when they are getting into, or out of a significant relationship.  Conclusion: Building a Strong FoundationBuilding a relationship is like building the foundation of a house.  There won't be any stability if your foundation is cracked, so take the time while you are divorcing to do the things that can help you look towards your future love life without emotional attachments in the past.     More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

FInd Transcript with times stamps also on this page. OpeningThe show is still in it's infancy.  If you are finding it helpful, please Subscribe to get all the episodes as they drop. New episodes drop every Thursday.  If you want others to find it, please share it or leave a 5 star review wherever you are listening to it.Even simple questions can reflect complex situations. That's what I love about relationships. Let's get into our next Hopeful Romantic Question of the Week.Main Segment: "Navigating Trust and Boundaries in Relationships"Dr. Colleen unpacks the Hopeful Romantic's QUestions of the week about what happens when sharing your location with you Love leads to uncomfortable feelings.Dr. Colleen critiques the misuse of location-sharing features and discusses its impact on trust.Highlights the role of past traumas in influencing present behaviors.Advises on the importance of communication in addressing discomfort in relationships.Offers a script for initiating a conversation with a partner about setting boundaries.Encourages listeners to prioritize their emotional well-being and seek professional help if needed.ConclusionDr. Colleen wraps up by inviting listeners to engage with her on social media and submit questions for future episodes.Reminds listeners to prioritize open communication and maintaining hope in relationships.ClosingDr. Colleen signs off and promises another insightful episode coming up.These show notes summarize Dr. Colleen's exploration of trust and boundaries in relationships, offering guidance to listeners on navigating challenging dynamics with their partners. These show notes were written by AI, They were not checked for grammar or anything other than providing a written record of the episode.  More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Love Unboxed, Season 1, Episode 003: How to Support Your Partner without Solving Their ProblemsWhat Happens When You Solve Your Partner's Problems for Them? Episode Title: Supporting Your Partner Without Solving Their ProblemsHost: Dr. Colleen Mullen, Hopeful Romantic & Relationship ExpertEpisode Overview: In today’s episode of Love Unboxed, we’re tackling a dilemma that many of us face in relationships: should you solve your partner's problems or just listen? This is an episode built around our first caller question, submitted by Mike, who asks whether it's better to offer solutions or simply support your partner when they're stressed.Dr. Colleen dives into why jumping in to "fix" things isn't always helpful, and how being a good listener can strengthen your connection. She shares practical questions you can ask your partner when they’re dealing with stress, helping them work through their emotions without feeling pressured. Plus, she gives an example from a couple’s therapy session to illustrate how avoiding the urge to solve every problem can lead to deeper emotional intimacy.Key Takeaways:Don't Solve Right Away: When your partner is stressed, they may just need to vent. Jumping to solutions can make them feel unheard.Be Curious: Ask your partner what’s really stressing them out and what’s the worst that could happen. This helps them express their emotions and calms their mind.Offer Support First: Only after they’ve had a chance to share, ask if they want your help solving the problem.Deepen Connection: Listening without solving builds trust and helps you understand your partner better.Example from a Couple's Session: Dr. Colleen shares the story of a successful couple who struggled to connect because the husband carried work stress home. Through conversation, he revealed irrational fears that were impacting his mood, even though the reality was much less dire. They learned to check in with each other daily, which helped them reconnect and work as a team.Listener Question:Mike asks if it’s better to solve your partner's problems or just listen. Dr. Colleen explores this common relationship challenge, offering guidance on how to balance support and problem-solving.Actionable Advice:When your partner is stressed, start by asking, "What’s stressing you out about this situation?"Follow up with, "What’s the worst thing that could happen if the situation doesn’t change?"After they’ve shared, ask, "Would you like some help with this, or do you just need to vent?"Call to Action:Do you have a dating or relationship dilemma you’d like Dr. Colleen to discuss on the show? Leave a voicemail at LoveUnboxedPodcast.com. You get five minutes to tell your story!Connect with Dr. Colleen:Instagram: @DrColleenMullenWebsite: CoachingThroughChaos.comNext Steps:Think about where you might be stuck in your relationship or dating life. Are you always looking to fix, or are you ready to listen and connect more deeply? Until next time, let’s keep hope alive! More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Love Unboxed Podcast - Season 1, Ep. 2 : “Reframing the Myth of Relationship Work”In this enlightening episode of Love Unboxed, host Dr. Colleen explores the commonly misunderstood phrase, “Relationships are a lot of work.” Drawing from her experience as a licensed marriage & family therapist & psychologist, she unpacks how this belief can lead to distress in relationships and offers a powerful reframe: “A sustainable relationship can be a lot of work at very specific times during its lifespan.” Dr. Colleen provides insight into navigating relationship challenges through the stories of two couples, Jenny & Tom and Jerry & Cindy, illustrating the importance of setting boundaries and recognizing red flags.**Key Points:**- The common misconception that all relationships should be difficult and require constant effort is addressed.- Understanding the difference between healthy relationship work and ineffective coping strategies.- Importance of the honeymoon phase and how it sets the foundation of a relationship.- Insights on recognizing red flags that are not necessarily deal breakers but must be acknowledged.- The role of boundaries in maintaining respect and balance within a relationship.- Discussion on the Broken Wing Syndrome, (find out more in Season 1, Episode 1) where one partner may unintentionally take on the caretaker role, leading to an unbalanced dynamic. **Couples Discussed:**1. **Jenny & Tom**: Jenny struggles with Tom's drinking and the hurtful behavior that sometimes accompanies it, leading to a pattern of rationalizing his actions instead of setting clear boundaries.2. **Jerry & Cindy**: Cindy’s trust issues stemming from a past relationship lead her to scrutinize Jerry's every move, creating a cycle of anxiety and frustration for both partners. **Takeaways:**- Recognizing when you are focusing on the wrong aspects of your relationship as “work.”- The significance of setting expectations and having open discussions about feelings and boundaries.- Practical strategies for navigating common relationship issues while maintaining personal well-being.- It's crucial to differentiate between changeable behaviors and deal breakers early in a relationship. **Resources:**- Visit [loveunboxpodcast.com](https://loveunboxpodcast.com) to submit questions or share your thoughts.- Check out Dr. Colleen's journal, "My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health," for more insights on mental well-being. **Connect with Us:**- **Voicemail**: Have a relationship question or story to share? Leave a message at loveunboxpodcast.com.**Join Us Next Time:**Stay tuned for future episodes where we tackle more aspects of love, relationships, and personal growth. Let’s keep hope alive and unpack love together!    More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

"Love, Unboxed: A Podcast for the Hopeful Romantic" is a new project by Dr. Colleen Mullen.  Dr. Colleen hopes this becomes collaborative with you. Each week, Dr. Colleen unboxes one topic on love & relationships so that you gain a deeper understanding of it and can manage it when it shows up in your life. Leave your relationship questions for Dr Colleen at LoveUnboxedPodcast.com. The first 5 people who leave a relationship question get a free copy of the journal Dr. Colleen designed: My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health.This is Season 1, Episode 1- The subject up for unboxing is the Broken Wing Syndrome. This is sometimes called the Broken Brid Syndrome. Neither the Broken Wing or Broken Bird Syndromes are actual diagnostic terms, rather, they are very popular ways of discussing a particular relationship dynamic.  Dr. Colleen has coined those who have the Broken Wing Syndrome and fall in love with the Birdies with Broken Wings, the Wing Whisperers. If you don't know these terms, but you've been insecure in relationships, or seem to reflect on past relationships and feel like you stayed too long, or can see in the reflection that you couldn't get what you needed from your partner emotionally, I encourage you to listen to this. You may relate to what Dr. Colleen unboxes. This unboxing includes:The love story of Jenny & Jack, who really enjoy each other, but ultimately can't be what each needs.How the Broken Wing Syndrome is different than the Savior Complex.What the Bird with the Broken Wing needs to heal their wing.What the Wing Whisperer needs to heal in order to find a more balanced partnership.The things Dr. Colleen wants the Wong Whisperer to know.TellTale signs you are dating a Birdie with a Broken Wing.What Jack & Jenny's relationship would have looked like if they got a post-therapy do-over.What topics do you want Dr. Colleen to unbox??? Leave your relationship questions for Dr Colleen at LoveUnboxedPodcast.com.  More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Host: Dr. Colleen MullenEpisode Overview: In this inaugural episode of Love Unboxed, Dr. Colleen Mullen introduces you to a podcast dedicated to demystifying love and relationships. With over 20 years of experience as a licensed therapist and a lifelong hopeful romantic, Dr. Mullen is here to cut through the noise and provide you with insightful guidance.Key Highlights:Introduction to Dr. Colleen Mullen: Learn about Dr. Mullen’s background and her passion for helping individuals navigate the complexities of love.Purpose of the Podcast: Discover how Love Unboxed aims to address the dilemmas of modern relationships and offer practical advice for hopeful romantics.What to Expect: Each week, Dr. Mullen will tackle your questions, providing valuable insights and strategies for fostering happy and healthy relationships.Join Us: Subscribe to Love Unboxed and embark on a journey to uncover the secrets of lasting love. Whether you’re single, dating, or in a committed relationship, there’s something for everyone in this empowering podcast.Connect with Us: Follow Dr. Colleen Mullen on social media and join our community of hopeful romantics. Share your questions and topics you’d like to see covered in future episodes!Tune in and get ready to unbox the love you deserve! More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Welcome to Love Unboxed, the podcast for the hopeful romantic! Hosted by Dr. Colleen Mullen, a therapist with over 20 years of experience and a lifelong hopeful romantic, this podcast is here to help you find and improve love in your life.In this trailer, Dr. Colleen introduces herself and her passion for helping people navigate the complexities of relationships. She's been a therapist for two decades, aiding clients in finding and sustaining love. Now, she's excited to share her knowledge with you.The show kicks off with Dr. Colleen inviting fellow Hopeful Romantics to join her on a brand-new unboxing adventure.Here are the key points from the Love Unboxed Podcast Trailer:1. Introduction (00:00:00 - 00:00:30):Dr. Colleen Mullen, a therapist for over 20 years, introduces Love Unboxed.The podcast is for the hopeful romantic, whether searching for love or seeking to improve existing relationships.2. Building a Community (00:00:37 - 00:01:05):Dr. Colleen establishes Love Unboxed as a space for all hopeful romantics.The show is for those struggling in relationships and those in long-term relationships that have lost their spark.Dr. Colleen shares her background as a licensed marriage and family therapist, emphasizing her passion for understanding relationships.Acknowledges personal growth and learning from her own experiences.3. Sharing Knowledge and Personal Growth (00:01:30 - 00:01:50):Dr. Colleen expresses her commitment to sharing what she's learned over the years about healthy relationship dynamics.Acknowledges her journey of personal growth and learning to walk the walk as she talks the talk.4. Listener Participation (00:01:50 - 00:02:37):The show thrives on listener participation.Dr. Colleen encourages hopeful romantic listeners to leave voicemails at loveunboxedpodcast.com with their relationship questions.Each week, a listener's question will be chosen, unboxed, and addressed, providing practical advice for both the questioner and other listeners.5. Unboxing Love (00:02:37 - 00:02:55):Dr. Colleen looks forward to unboxing love each week with her listeners.Promises practical advice for navigating relationship dilemmas, ensuring that everyone gains valuable knowledge to handle similar situations.Get ready for a weekly journey into the world of love, relationships, and personal growth with Love Unboxed. Tune in and participate to unbox the complexities of love in your life!     More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her work at DrColleenMullen.com. Upcoming Workshops "Date Differently"  - for singles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. "Love Them More " - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You won't pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.TBD:  Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show-hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.  Dr. Colleen creates stories of people who are not meant to mimic, copy, or otherwise represent any specific person. These are characters she creates using various  data points from multiple people. Any likeness to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidence.  Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on mental health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Love Unboxed Podcast - Episode: Navigating Unwanted Advances: A Compassionate ResponseIntroduction: Welcome to another episode of Love Unboxed: For the Hopeful Romantic, where Dr. Colleen explores the complexities of love and relationships. In today's episode, Dr. Colleen addresses a common dilemma faced by many hopeful romantics - navigating unwanted advances from friends. Tune in as she provides compassionate guidance and practical advice.Segment 1: Hopeful Romantic Question:  Our caller shares her experience of receiving flirtatious texts from a recently divorced friend, causing discomfort due to his marital status. Dr. Colleen acknowledges the caller's vulnerability and prepares to provide insights to navigate this challenging situation.Segment 2: Understanding Boundaries Dr. Colleen delves into the concept of boundaries, emphasizing their importance in relationships. She explains how childhood experiences shape individuals' boundary-setting tendencies and discusses various parenting styles that influence boundary development.Segment 3: Types of Boundary Challenges Exploring different types of boundary challenges, Dr. Colleen highlights examples of overly permeable, rigid, hypersensitive, and confused boundaries. She offers insights into how these patterns manifest in adult relationships and affect communication and trust.Segment 4: Empowering Self-Advocacy Providing guidance for our caller, Dr. Colleen emphasizes the importance of clear communication and self-advocacy. She encourages setting boundaries assertively while prioritizing personal well-being and offers strategies for navigating difficult conversations.Conclusion: As the episode concludes, Dr. Colleen reinforces the significance of respecting boundaries in relationships. She invites listeners to share their experiences and offers support for those navigating similar challenges. Remember, your well-being matters, and setting boundaries is a crucial step towards building healthy connections.Stay Connected: Visit loveunboxedpodcast.com to leave a voicemail sharing your relationship dilemmas or providing feedback on the episode. Let's keep hope alive and continue our journey of love and self-discovery together. Until next time, take care and remember, you deserve love and respect in all your relationships. Show notes written by chatgpt  More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her therapy & consulting page at CoachingThroughChaos.comUpcoming Workshops in 2024Date Differently  - for the singlles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. Love Them More  - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You wont pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.   Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on menatl health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you, or someone you love is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Title: Love Unboxed Ep 007: Matt - How to Step Out of Your Own Relationship MudIntro to Love Unboxed Podcast Dr. Colleen returns refreshed to dive into today's topic: stepping out of your own mud in relationships.Reminds listeners to submit relationship questions on loveunboxpodcast.com.  This show only exists to answer your relationship questions. You can leave me a voice message at LoveUnboxedPodcast.com.  You get 5 minutes to share the details you would want me to know about your struggle and ask what you want to know. The Hopeful Romantic Question of the Week:Matt asks Dr. Colleen about maintaining realistic expectations and avoiding red flags in relationships while staying grounded.Unboxing the Topic:Dr. Colleen delves into the root cause of getting stuck in one's own relationship "mud."Shares personal experience of being stuck in a relationship with conflicting goalHow to Step Out of Your Own Mud:Be conscious of your wants and needs in a relationship.Be willing to walk away if the relationship doesn't align with your needs.Don't date someone just because they're nice; prioritize compatibility.Regularly check in with yourself about how you feel in the relationship.Beware of the "too good to be true" factor; trust your instincts.A story to show how a person can get into their mud and also how to get out of the mud. Dr. Colleen walks through a hypothetical scenario illustrating how these steps can prevent getting stuck in a relationship that doesn't work for you. Closing Words:Encourages listeners to prioritize their own needs and authenticity in relationships.Emphasizes the importance of being loved as you want to be loved.Encourages self-awareness and setting boundaries for healthier relationships. More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her therapy & consulting page at CoachingThroughChaos.comUpcoming Workshops in 2024Date Differently  - for the singlles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. Love Them More  - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You wont pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.   Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on menatl health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you, or someone you love is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

A Chaotic Week It's been a chatic week.  I had to remind myself I can give myself permission to take some things off my schedule.  I often lose sight of what a privledge that is.  My routine has been thrown off and my family is dealing with a bit more stress than usual.  The stress was bleeding into my day- so I decided I needed to get back to basics for a day or 2.  I sought some fun and some peaceful time. MY husband is good for a laugh and I went on a few of my daily walks by myself, as that's my happy place.  I want to remind you to check in with your self if need be and hope you find a laugh and some peace today as well. .Hopeful Romantic Question of the Week: Jenny: How do you get that feeling back when you just want to be around your partner all the time and can't keep your hands off them?THE UNBOXING  Uderstanding the Spark:Dr. Mullen delves into the concept of the "honeymoon phase" in relationships, characterized by intense passion and excitement.She discusses the neurological basis of infatuation and the role of the hypothalamus in triggering feelings of love.Research findings on the duration of the honeymoon phase and the transition to more stable forms of love are explored.The impact of the "inner imposter" syndrome on maintaining the honeymoon phase is highlighted.Factors Leading to Loss of Spark:Dr. Mullen identifies several factors contributing to the decline of passion in long-term relationships:Comfort level and predictabilityNeglecting the relationship amidst busy schedules and other responsibilitiesCommunication breakdowns and unresolved conflictsTaking each other for grantedExternal stressors affecting intimacy and desireStrategies for Reigniting the Spark:Practical advice is provided for couples to rejuvenate their relationship:Prioritize communication and share daily experiencesMake quality time a priority and engage in novel experiences togetherIncorporate physical affection and express appreciation regularlyCultivate romance through thoughtful gestures and special momentsContinuously evaluate personal growth and seek professional help if neededConclusion:Dr. Mullen concludes by emphasizing the importance of effort and commitment from both partners in rekindling passion and strengthening the bond.Listeners are encouraged to subscribe to the podcast and engage on social media for updates and additional content.Closing Remarks:Dr. Mullen signs off with a message of hope and encouragement for all hopeful romantics.Listeners are invited to subscribe to the Love Unboxed podcast for more insightful discussions on love and relationships. They can also connect with Dr. Colleen Mullen on various social media platforms for ongoing engagement and updates.    More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her therapy & consulting page at CoachingThroughChaos.comUpcoming Workshops in 2024Date Differently  - for the singlles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. Love Them More  - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You wont pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.   Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on menatl health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you, or someone you love is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Love, Unboxed: for the Hopeful RomanticHopeful Romantic Call of the Week is from Teddy Subject: Understanding Attachment Styles in Relationships Do you ever worry you could scare someone off if you tell them what you feel too early in a relationship? Our Hopeful Romantic Call of the Week is from Teddy.  He expresses concerned that his girlfriend could end the relaitonship if he shares how he feels too soon. Dr. Colleen provides some information on anxious attachment styles and then gives Teddy some advice on how he can be more secure in his relationship. I recorded this episode on Valentine's Day so I started the episode with a special message for you. The Unboxing! Today, we're delving into a crucial question: How soon is too soon to express your feelings in a new relationship? To explore this, we'll examine attachment styles, particularly focusing on the anxious-ambivalent attachment style. Attachment styles, rooted in our early experiences, shape how we connect with others. John Bowlby's pioneering work highlighted four main attachment styles: secure, anxious-ambivalent, anxious-avoidant, and disorganized. These styles influence how we perceive and form relationships throughout our lives. Anxious-ambivalent individuals often fear abandonment and rejection, seeking reassurance from their partners. They may struggle with self-esteem and fear being perceived as clingy. Our caller, Teddy, exemplifies this attachment style, expressing concerns about expressing his feelings too soon and potentially driving his partner away. For Teddy and others navigating similar feelings, it's essential to understand that expressing emotions early in a relationship isn't inherently wrong. However, it's crucial to assess whether these feelings stem from genuine connection or anxious attachment. Building a secure attachment takes time and self-awareness. It involves being patient, allowing the relationship to evolve naturally, and giving space for mutual growth. Constant contact and seeking reassurance may hinder rather than nurture the bond. Effective communication is key. Expressing your feelings authentically while respecting your partner's pace fosters a healthy dynamic. Remember, it's okay for your partner's response to differ from yours. What matters is creating a safe space for open dialogue and mutual understanding. Ultimately, Teddy and anyone navigating anxious attachment can cultivate security by challenging fears, managing emotions, and fostering trust over time. Self-awareness and patience are powerful tools on the journey to a fulfilling, secure relationship.   More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her therapy & consulting page at CoachingThroughChaos.comUpcoming Workshops in 2024Date Differently  - for the singlles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. Love Them More  - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You wont pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.   Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on menatl health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you, or someone you love is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe 

Love Unboxed Podcast Show Notes: Episode 2 - How Soon After Divorce Should You Start Dating? Welcome to Love Unboxed, the podcast for the hopeful romantic, hosted by Dr. Colleen Mullen, a therapist with over 20 years of experience.Dr. Colleen shares insights on finding and maintaining love based on her years of helping clients navigate relationships. Today's episode is a deep dive into the question: How soon after divorce should you start dating?The UnboxingThe Hopeful Romantic Question of the WeekDr. Colleen addresses the question: "How soon after you are divorced should you start dating?"  This is a complex question with a complex answer. First, we'll review common reasons for divorcing and then Dr. Colleen shares some questions for you to answer.               Common Reasons for Divorce:Unrealistic Expectations Fequent arguments or arguing in a different style than your partnerLack of attentionSubstance use problems         Understanding Your Readiness to Date1.  Reflect on the reasons behind your divorce.  Do you know the reason?  If not, why? Dr. Colleen provides some food for thought around communication struggles that can infiltrate a marriage. 2.  Determine if you are emotionally available to date.  What is your motive for jumping back into the dating pool.  Be clear abotu this with your self and with the people you date. Be able to be O.K. with being alone.  Be able to differentiate between being alone and being lonely. 3.  We explore the impact of betrayal on a person. If you had an affair, do you know what was going on with you that you were able to step outside of your committment to your partner? If your partner had an affair, how did you process the betrayal,  Is it resolved enough that you won't be leading with distrust or an expectation of betrayal in your next relationship?Therapy is a great tool during this time. When you are trying to do things in your love life different than you have in the past, therapy can help becuase there will be some un-learning to do as you learn new ways to be.  There can be so much growth in the area of self-awareness during a divorce. It's one of Dr. Colleen's favorite times to work with her clients - when they are getting in to, or out of a significant relationship. Conclusion: Building a Strong FoundationBuilding a relationship is like building the foundation of a house.  There wont be any stability if your foundation is cracked, so take the time while you are divorcing to do the things that can help you look towards your future love life without emotional attachments in the past. Compares starting a relationship to building a house, emphasizing the need for a stable foundation.   More Resources from Dr. Colleen My Mindful Reflections: A Daily Journal for Better Mental Health (get it on Amazon) -  This is a journal designed by Dr. Colleen.  You can use it to track your emotions, highlight  special moments, learn from difficult ones , let go of daily steam through daily narrative pages , and even learn to give yourself permission to take a break.Do you want to hire Dr. Colleen to help you?  Please check out her therapy & consulting page at CoachingThroughChaos.comUpcoming Workshops in 2024Date Differently  - for the singlles who want to break free from past relationship obstacles. Love Them More  - for those in committed relationships who  want to  protect their relationship from future obstacles.  SUPPORT THE SHOW! AMAZON.COM Use code LoveUnboxed-20 at checkout when you make your regular purchases on Amazon or visit Dr. Colleen's Amazon storefront.  You wont pay anything extra, but Dr. Colleen will make a small commission on what you purchase.Patreon- FInd out the perks of joining the Hopeful Romantic community!DisclaimerThis show exists only for educational and/or entertainment purposes.  Although Dr. Mullen is a licensed therapist, in the capacity of  her show hosting duties, she is not your therapist. This show is not meant as a replacement for therapy.   Resources for Finding a Mental Health Professional in the U.S. Therapy DenPsychology TodayMental Health MattersTherapy for Black GirlsDial 211 to be connected to a Social Services Helpline in your area that can provide you with information on menatl health resources in your area.The National Suicide Prevention Helpline.  or call 988    If you, or someone you love is thinking about suicide, they are there to help. Dr. Colleen's online voicemail line is powered by SpeakPipe