Mom and Mind

The Blue Dot Project is an exciting program within PSI, and I’m thrilled for today’s guest to share it with us. We will learn about the project’s details and how you can get involved. The goal of the program is to provide the necessary resources and professionals for mothers and families during the perinatal period, so that everyone can access the support they need. Their brand-new initiative, The Blue Dot Safe Spot, is already helping people and saving lives—and it’s just getting started! Join us to learn more! Laura Killgore began her career in early childhood development, serving as a preschool teacher and curriculum director for 10 years. She has a passion for child development and parent education. She married her husband in 2016, and their daughter was born two years later. Following a traumatic birth and an emergency C-section, Laura experienced postpartum depression, anxiety, and OCD. A few months after her daughter’s birth, she had the opportunity to tap into her creative side as a social media manager and branding expert for 2020 Mom, now the Policy Center for Maternal Mental Health, Mom Congress, and The Blue Dot Project. As a longtime advocate, Laura has joined Mom Congress in Washington, DC, on multiple occasions to speak with legislators about her personal experiences and help pass several bills and acts to better support moms and families nationwide. In 2023, the Blue Dot Project transitioned to its new home within Postpartum Support International. Laura is now a full-time PSI employee focusing on the Blue Dot, growing the brand through awareness, and helping to end the stigma and shame surrounding perinatal mental health. In Laura’s free time, you can find her listening to or watching true crime podcasts or shows, camping with her family, and exploring her beautiful home state of Oregon.  Show Highlights: Laura’s story of becoming a mom and beginning her involvement with The Blue Dot Project  A traumatic birth, emergency C-section, and a fuzzy, detached feeling New family challenges when she and her husband both lost their jobs when their daughter was three weeks old A flurry of diagnoses that explained some of what Laura had experienced since childhood, even OCD and bipolar disorder Laura’s work with 2020 Mom while going through postpartum problems The beginnings and evolution of The Blue Dot Project The new iteration of The Blue Dot Project, The Blue Dot Safe Spot, which focuses on training support staff who interact with moms/families during the perinatal period The Blue Dot Safe Spot answers the “Now, what?” question for people who need more perinatal support. Laura’s vision for getting The Blue Dot Safe Spot in places everywhere How you can get involved (Email Laura at laurak@postpartum.net and visit https://www.thebluedotproject.org; click the link to join the Interest List for The Blue Dot Safe Spot.  Resources: Connect with Laura Killgore and The Blue Dot Project: Website, Instagram, and Facebook. Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!  If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please ⁠email me⁠ about openings for private pay clients. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s episode marks the beginning of a four-part series on coping with specific holiday scenarios, including infertility, pregnancy, postpartum, and pregnancy loss. We will discuss tips and tricks that can also be useful at other times of the year when emotional challenges arise. I’ll offer coping skills that can help you, especially in your interactions with others. Today’s focus is on infertility and how to navigate the holidays when you are struggling. Join us! Show Highlights: Handling the inevitable questions from friends, family, and acquaintances The “preloaded” expected feelings that come with the holidays–and the pressure they bring Navigating family gatherings when the spotlight is on you It’s okay to feel jealous, angry, sad, and resentful when others are experiencing what you desperately want. Intrusive questions are coming your way—for sure! (Everyone has an opinion on what you should do!) Understanding the emotional landscape you’re in Gentle reframes to use as coping skills: It’s okay to feel however you feel, as opposed to how you think you should feel. (Shift from judgment to compassion and understanding.) When things get busy, it’s harder to pay attention to what you need. (Take time for grounding, centering, and self-care.) Don’t be afraid to set boundaries as a way to honor your needs. When it comes to attending holiday events, set the following boundaries: Say NO. Have an exit strategy. Protect your energy and peace.  Resources: Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media, including Instagram, Facebook, andother platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!  If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode introduces us to maternal ecodistress, explaining what it is and its relationship to matrescence. We also discuss why mothers are vulnerable to mental health challenges in relation to a changing climate and how we can support mothers in this experience. Join us to learn more through this fascinating conversation! Dr. Allie Davis is a maternal mental health ecotherapist, author of The Mother Tree Method™, and creator of the Maternal Ecopsychology Certification™ for professionals supporting mothers through climate-aware, nature-based mental health care. She is the founder of Root and Ritual Wellness, based in Santa Fe, New Mexico, where she supports mothers in transforming ecodistress into rooted resilience through nature-based practices, storytelling, and care-centered community.  Show Highlights: Understanding the role of a nature therapist, or ecotherapist, in maternal mental health The certification available for professionals in maternal ecopsychology Indicators that someone is being impacted by climate change Shifts we are seeing in how people want to live in relation to nature Offering space and support for mothers through their growth Categories included under the umbrella of ecodistress Deep connections to nature can impact the way we navigate grief, trauma, and hope. Ecological questing and its relationship to matrescence, identity, and well-being Mothers are more susceptible to climate distress Dr. Allie’s observations about ecodistress in pregnancy and postpartum Mothers and the eco-guilt burden they bear as caretakers of children and the home Being a good mother and a “good, green mother” Dr. Allie’s support for mothers in ecodistress, a trauma symptom that a reattachment to the earth can remedy Finding support for ecodistress in your community Focusing on “nearby nature” as a nature-based intervention Resources: Connect with Dr. Allie Davis: Website and Instagram *The insights Dr. Davis shares in this episode are part of her project, Bringing Maternal Ecodistress into the Climate Conversation: A Media Toolkit for Science Communicators, supported by the Schmidt Science Communication Catalyst Grant.  You can learn more and explore the Media Toolkit at www.dralliedavis.com/toolkit.   Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!  If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s guest shares her work in mentoring the next generation of doulas and helping maternal healthcare professionals balance the heart of their work with sustainable business practices. We also discuss Medicaid, systemic barriers to care, and systemic barriers that prevent some populations from accessing doula services. Join us to learn more! Jacquelyn Clemmons is a veteran birth and postpartum doula, trainer, and mentor with over 20 years of experience serving diverse, intercultural families. She is the author of A Doula's Guide to Improving Maternal Health for BIPOC Women  and is the producer of the short film, Jazz and the Blues. Jacquelyn is a leading advocate for culturally competent care and a passionate supporter of doula services for all women. Through her Intrinsic Doula Design™ framework, she empowers doulas to build authentic, thriving businesses while transforming the families they serve.  Show Highlights: Jacquelyn’s journey into doula work Jacquelyn’s framework, Intrinsic Doula Design™  The shift in doula work in 2020 Understanding the basics of business development is a big piece of doula work. The importance of a sustainable pricing model from the beginning Jacquelyn’s work as an advocate in Oregon Sustainable doulas help to stimulate local economies. Medicaid reimbursements for doula care are up to $3500 in the state of WA, which is leading the way. (OR and CA are close behind.) Hospitals’ greed—-watch out for it! What can you do? Advocate for yourself by always asking, “Can you please document that in my chart?” (Hospitals speak the language of liability.) Jacquelyn’s film project, Jazz and the Blues (See the trailer at okionu.app.) The need for comprehensive support for families, even those with good family support Jacquelyn’s book, A Doula's Guide to Improving Maternal Health for BIPOC Women  A well-matched doula can be a strong support for maternal mental health. The need for cultural respect and well-matched core values Resources: Connect with Jacquelyn Clemmons: Website, Instagram, and A Doula's Guide to Improving Maternal Health for BIPOC Women  Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!  If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is the final episode of the 4-part series, 2 am Pep Talks. You can check out Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3 by clicking these links. Today’s episode is all about hope! It is essential to understand that this season of early morning wake-up times will pass. Sleeping through the night again will happen for you, even though you may wonder now if you will ever sleep enough to feel like yourself again. A perinatal mood and anxiety disorder can increase the likelihood of thoughts filled with self-judgment, negativity, and hopelessness. Having to attend to the middle-of-the-night details of infant care can, even without PMADs, leave you feeling wrung out, tired, and isolated. It’s hard to maintain hope that this phase will shift when you are in the middle of it. Believe me, with time, practice, and support, everything will get easier, but it’s often difficult to see through to the other side. Join me for today’s discussion. Show Highlights: Identify one thing you are looking forward to in the morning–even if it’s just that first cup of coffee! Nighttime care can feel monotonous and never-ending. Look at all the things you’ve learned! Take encouragement from other moms who can validate your experiences. Learn to validate your own feelings. Resilience and growth are yours to claim and honor. Tips for that middle-of-the-night time: Use visualizations and affirmations. Assure yourself that you are learning, shifting, and growing. Be gentle with yourself. You are doing better than you think! Resources: Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!  If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s topic centers around a book written by my guest, Dr. Margo Lowy. She has researched and written about maternal ambivalence, including how to understand it and why it remains a taboo subject. We will discuss destigmatizing uncomfortable feelings and normalize the understanding that motherhood is not “all or nothing.” We’ll cover the darker emotions of anger, guilt, and resentment, and we'll refute the myth of “the perfect mother” and recognize that motherhood can be viewed in different ways. Join us to learn more! Dr. Margo Lowy is a psychotherapist specializing in mothering. She is the author of Maternal Ambivalence: The Loving Moments and Bitter Truths of Motherhood and her previous book, The Maternal Experience: Encounters with Ambivalence and Love. Dr. Lowy earned her doctorate from the University of South Wales in Sydney, Australia, and she has spoken on maternal ambivalence at universities and in media interviews worldwide. She is a columnist for Psychology Today, a member of PEN America, and a former advisor to the founder of the Australian Jewish Fertility Network (AJFN). As a mom of three adult children, she makes her home in NYC with her husband.  Show Highlights: Understanding maternal ambivalence and ALL the associated emotions Motherhood, at its essence, involves complicated feelings. Unrealistic expectations of mothers In motherhood, we ONLY learn by making mistakes and repairing them. Mothering means we make mistakes and learn from them. Perfection is an impossible, rigid goal; we need humor and laughter in motherhood. Children seeing us encounter challenges and NOT being perfect Importance of discernment in social media messages Finding your team and community Emulating our mothers vs. finding our own mothering style  When it’s hard to give yourself a pat on the back Understanding the value of difficult emotions Indicators of maternal ambivalence An example of advocating for YOUR motherhood journey Dr. Lowy’s practical advice to mothers Resources: Connect with Dr. Margo Lowy  Website, Instagram Dr. Lowy’s Books  Maternal Ambivalence: The Loving Moments and Bitter Truths of Motherhood The Maternal Experience: Encounters with Ambivalence and Love Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!  If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I’m honored to interview Jaimie Kelton for today’s episode. She shares interesting parts of her journey as a queer parent, discusses elements of queer family building, and opens up about her three-year infertility journey as a queer woman. Her motherhood story includes birth trauma and postpartum anxiety. As a podcast host, Jaimie explains how hearing from the guests on her show has helped her on her healing journey.  Jaimie Kelton hosts The Queer Family Podcast, an award-winning show that uplifts and normalizes LGBTQIA+ families by sharing real, candid, and often hilarious stories about queer family building. She is a Webby Honoree and was named one of GO Magazine’s “100 Women We Love.” Jaimie has also been named one of Podcast Magazine’s “Top 50 Moms in Podcasting.” Her work has been featured in The Washington Post, People, Parents Magazine, and more. She is the co-author of If These Ovaries Could Talk: The Things We've Learned About Making an LGBTQ Family. A longtime performer, queer mom, and outspoken advocate, Jaimie brings humor and heart to every conversation about parenting, visibility, and justice for LGBTQ families.  Show Highlights: Jaimie’s family-building journey for her and her wife to have two children, making a lot of decisions quickly The logistics of each of them carrying a child, which meant multiple IUI and IVF cycles for Jaimie to get pregnant Switching doctors and clinics: why it was refreshing to change things up Differences in clinics for LGBTQIA+ families and non-LGBTQIA+ families Jaimie’s philosophy of “gay drafting”and how it works for queer families The not-so-simple process of filling out paperwork for their babies’ birth certificates Jaimie’s relatively easy pregnancy and the traumatic birth of her son via emergency C-section Postpartum struggles with severe anxiety and fears about her son dying Feeling “out of control” and stuck when you know you should be grateful Parenting with “a little more than normal” worry and fears Jaimie’s podcast topics, which allow her to learn and experience healing from hearing other people’s stories Resources: Connect with Jaimie Kelton: Website, Instagram, TikTok, The Queer Family Podcast, and If These Ovaries Could Talk: The Things We've Learned About Making an LGBTQ Family Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!  If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In Part 1 of this series, we discussed how heavy and burdensome things can feel in the middle of the night when you are alone with your baby, struggling to function and feeling exhausted.  In Part 2, we ventured into what it’s like when anxiety and intrusive thoughts pop up in the middle of the night. Today’s focus is on the importance of taking care of YOU, even in the middle of the night. You could feel “touched out” and overwhelmed, forgetting that you need self-care, too. You need to actively and intentionally have a plan. Let’s explore this topic further! Show Highlights: Your options in the middle of the night may be limited.  Think ahead and plan for water/snacks while taking care of the baby. Have them available nearby. Consider your personal comfort: blankets, socks, a sweater, or a small fan Plan for other options for music/noise besides doom-scrolling on your phone. After tending to the baby's needs, do some gentle stretches to help your neck, shoulders, and arms relax and release tension. “Are there small do-able things I can do to inject a little more self-care and attention into that hour or so in the middle of the night?” The magic in a slow, deep breath in and out to regulate your nervous system Feeling physically tired and “wired” at the same time Self-care is NOT selfish! Enlist your partner to help—before bedtime. (Dr. Kat shares tips about asking for help in the right way.) If you have that feeling of dread about the middle of the night, find one thing that brings you comfort and calm; add it into your middle-of-the-night practice. Consider using affirmations and meditation for grounding and self-compassion. Give yourself the same kindness that you would give to a friend.  Resources: Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media, including Instagram, Facebook, and other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!  If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, I’m excited to be joined by Emily Harrington, one of the most successful and versatile professional climbers in the world. Emily discusses the pressure of failure and perfectionism in motherhood, pregnancy, and postpartum, which are common experiences among mothers. Join us to hear this beautiful conversation about life at the intersection of motherhood and elite athleticism in a largely male-dominated sport. Emily Harrington is a five-time US National Champion, has completed numerous first female ascents of 5.14 routes, summited Mt. Everest, and made a complete ski descent of Cho Oyu, the world’s sixth-tallest peak. She made history when she became the first woman to free-climb “Golden Gate on El Capitan in under 24 hours. The movie about Emily’s career, Girl Climber, is screening at IMAX theaters and various cinemas through the end of the year. It will be available on JOLT starting on October 15 and will be available for full streaming in November. Emily currently resides in Tahoe City, CA, where she spends her time training, climbing, and skiing with her husband and young son.  Show Highlights: Common assumptions about what moms “can/can’t” do Emily’s journey as a climber, which started at age 10 Thinking about having a baby as a natural part of life The 7-year plan to climb El Capitan—and then have a baby A plan for modified climbing and running as her pregnant body changed Approaching pregnancy from a place of curiosity Feeling unprepared for what came after childbirth Breastfeeding and sleep challenges—and dealing with unsolicited advice Emily’s way of dealing with others’ judgments and comparisons Parallels between climbing and motherhood Letting go of perfection to find more peace “Enjoying the struggle and embracing failure” Girl Climber: how it tells the story that we all go through failure, and we can show that with honesty and vulnerability Climbing: a sport that is growing in popularity and accessibility What Emily wants other moms to know Resources: Connect with Emily Harrington: Instagram and the screening schedule for Girl Climber Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media, including Instagram, Facebook, and other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!  If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Our conversation today is on the recent FDA panel about the safety of antidepressants during pregnancy—and all the ways the panel got it wrong. It’s not just about wrong information, but it’s about the harm that wrong information does to people in the perinatal period. Join us to learn more about why this information from the FDA is so dangerous to women.  Dr. Catherine Birndorf is a reproductive psychiatrist and the CEO, founder, and medical director of The Motherhood Center of New York. Dr. Birndorf is a founding director of the Payne Whitney Women’s Program at Weill Cornell Medical Center at New York-Presbyterian Hospital, where she is a clinical associate professor of psychiatry. A graduate of Smith College, Dr. Birndorf attended Brown University Medical School and did her psychiatry residency at New York-Presbyterian Hospital. For 10 years, Dr. Birndorf was a regular mental health columnist for Self Magazine and appeared on numerous television programs, including the Today Show, Good Morning America, MSNBC, and CNN. Her most recent book, What No One Tells You: A Guide to Your Emotions from Pregnancy to Motherhood, was published by Simon & Schuster in 2019. Show Highlights: Dr. Birndorf’s perspective on the FDA panel and their decisions: “I knew this was a disaster in the making.” The FDA panel was made up of 10 “experts” (8 men/2 women) who were biased and stacked against medication and mental illness. Women have been suffering, and they continue to suffer. The work of The Motherhood Center in supporting women who need help through mental illness The potential for harm is HUGE.  What Dr. Birndorf wants people to know about mental illness and life-saving medications Dr. Birndorf’s motivation to start The Motherhood Center Highlights of the support provided for women through The Motherhood Center The ways we “mother” have impacts on the generations to come; no mother should suffer with mental illness when transformation is possible. The Motherhood Center focuses on all the therapies and interventions that bring wellness, not just medications.  Resources: Connect with Dr. Catherine Birndorf: Website, Instagram, Facebook, and What No One Tells You: A Guide to Your Emotions from Pregnancy to Motherhood Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov. Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773.  There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services. You can also follow PSI on social media, including Instagram, Facebook, and other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course.  Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today, I’m bringing you the second part of my 2 am Pep Talk. This time, I’m really focusing on supporting new parents, especially those of you who might be feeling anxious, lonely, or dealing with those tough, intrusive thoughts that can pop up during pregnancy or after having a baby. I know those quiet, late-night hours can make everything feel even more overwhelming, and I want you to know you’re not alone in that. I’m discussing setting aside “worry time” to help manage anxious thoughts, using thought labeling to get some distance from those worries, practicing grounding exercises to stay present, and I even guide you through a relaxing body scan technique to help calm both your mind and body. Your feelings are valid, and there are fundamental, actionable strategies you can use to navigate the ups and downs of perinatal mental health. Tune in to hear more! Show Highlights: Emotional challenges faced by new parents during pregnancy and after childbirth Feelings of loneliness, anxiety, intrusive thoughts, and exhaustion Normalization of negative feelings and experiences in new parenthood Practical coping strategies for managing anxiety and intrusive thoughts Techniques such as "worry time" and labeling anxious thoughts Grounding exercises, including the 5-4-3-2-1 method Importance of seeking support and recognizing when to reach out for help Impact of sleep deprivation and hormonal changes on mental health The significance of mindfulness and relaxation techniques, such as body scans Encouragement and reassurance for new parents navigating perinatal mental health challenges Resources: Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Maternal rage is, unfortunately, more common than we want to think. The worst part is that not many people are talking about it, which only adds to the stigma and misunderstanding. New mothers are led to believe that they shouldn’t feel rage and anger, and they are shamed when they do. We are uncovering maternal rage, exploring how and why it manifests, and what can be done about it. Join us to learn more! Nicole McNelis is a licensed mental health therapist and a specialist in perinatal mental health counseling. She is the founder of an award-winning counseling private practice in the suburbs of Philadelphia, where she resides with her family. She has been featured as a mental health expert in print publications, online media, books, and podcasts, and she serves as a subject matter expert and conference presenter for Postpartum Support International. Nicole is passionate about serving the perinatal mental health community through life transitions, big and small.  Show Highlights: Understanding maternal rage Nicole’s belief is that EVERY mom experiences maternal rage at some point. The “completely unrealistic, nonsensical, and harmful expectations” that we have of mothers in our society A mother’s experience of injustice, both systemically and in her household Nicole’s experience and journey with mom rage during the pandemic The correlation between mom rage, depression, and anxiety An overloaded system that cannot take any more When rage is a rational response to what you’re experiencing in your environment Ways in which rage commonly shows up: the buildup, the explosion, and the aftermath Individual and system strategies that are sustainable Recognizing the “season” you’re in helps customize the interventions and strategies. The two broad factors contributing to mom rage: compromised needs and violated expectations  Changing our language around sharing household and family labor between partners Nicole’s two-pronged approach to acknowledging and easing mom rage through individual interventions and strategies ALL of the responsibility should not be put on the mother! Nicole’s “rupture and repair” strategy of parenting  Nicole’s takeaways: “It’s not a meltdown; it’s a message.” Resources: Connect with Nicole McNelis: Website and Instagram Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode explores how doulas integrate themselves into the healthcare system to enhance outcomes for mothers, families, and babies. There are countless benefits to hiring a doula to improve the pregnancy, birth, and postpartum experience. Join us to learn more! HeHe Stewart is a leading childbirth educator, advocate, and maternity care reform expert. With a master’s in human development and over a decade of experience, she empowers families with evidence-based birth prep, informed decision-making, and postpartum readiness. She is a fierce advocate for informed consent, reducing unnecessary interventions, and ensuring patient autonomy in birth. Beyond working with families, HeHe is actively involved in legislative efforts to improve women’s health policies and expand access to midwifery care. She works to reform maternity care by advocating for patient rights, increased birth options, and improved mental health outcomes. As the host of The Birth Lounge Podcast, HeHe interviews leading experts in women’s health, pregnancy, and newborn development, giving parents the knowledge they need to navigate birth and postpartum with confidence. Her work continues to drive meaningful change through education, advocacy, and policy reform.  Show Highlights: HeHe’s path to this work–a continual emphasis on advocacy Birth doulas and postpartum doulas: What they do and how they help A doula is beneficial for every pregnancy and birth, offering unique care. The intimate relationship between doula and client (“I have a cheerleader who will advocate for me.”) The benefits of a birth doula result in reduced risks and problems. HeHe’s role in “pausing the room and giving space” for the patient to ask questions of the healthcare providers The big lesson for healthcare providers: The person who’s giving birth will never forget how you make them feel in their experience.  When a doula notices problems and needs to intervene Doing better for women in pregnancy and the postpartum What HeHe wants women to know about self-advocacy Resources: Connect with HeHe Stewart: The Birth Lounge, Tranquility by HeHe, The Birth Lounge Instagram, Tranquility by HeHe Instagram, and The Birth Lounge App (available from the Apple App Store and Google Play) Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident looking for a therapist in perinatal mental health, email me about openings for private pay clients! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We are starting something different today that will carry through the next few Behind the Sessions episodes. I’m tackling those “middle-of-the-night” feelings during pregnancy and the postpartum. Nighttime can bring feelings of dread and loneliness that mothers experience as a heaviness, and all of this can magnify and intensify any perinatal mood and anxiety disorders to make life very challenging for a sleep-deprived parent. You are not alone, and there is a whole community of people experiencing the same things. Think of these subsequent few sessions as your “2 am pep talk.” Join me now! Show Highlights: The importance of connection Sleep deprivation makes everything darker. You may feel like you’re doing everything wrong. You are doing a LOT while giving love and care to your baby. You aren’t a bad mother if you don’t LOVE middle-of-the-night care. Don’t judge yourself because of how you feel at 2 am. The next few episodes will include coping skills for the middle of the night. Join me for a guided visualization to ease your feelings of isolation. Join me for self-compassion affirmations to try today. Resources: Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident looking for a therapist in perinatal mental health, email me about openings for private pay clients! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s episode brings you interesting insights into the connection between sleep and temperament. We dig into the science and psychology behind why it is harder for some babies to settle into sleep—and the connection to their overall temperament. Join us to learn more about this fascinating topic. Macall Gordon is a researcher, speaker, and author specializing in the link between temperament and sleep, especially as it relates to sleep training advice. Her master’s degree in applied psychology is from Antioch University, and her B.S. degree in human biology is from Stanford. She is a certified Gentle Sleep Coach and has worked with thousands of parents of alert, sensitive, intense children. Issues with her own two children and feeling that she hadn’t slept for 18 years have influenced her focus on this work. Her book is Why Won't You Sleep?! A Game-Changing Approach for Exhausted Parents of Nonstop, Super Alert, Big Feeling Kids. Show Highlights: Temperament: When does this form in a baby? Managing expectations without blaming yourself Why some babies don’t sleep well Myths about training newborns Regulation in relationships just makes sense. Self-soothing: Are babies capable of soothing themselves? At what age? Understanding “differential susceptibility”: Mellow babies vs. sensitive babies Parent blame and unnecessary stress because of sleep issues Temperament mismatch between parents and children Macall’s advice to parents who are struggling right now: Start moving/shifting, and realize that kids usually need more sleep than they indicate.  Resources: Connect with Macall Gordon: Website, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Why Won't You Sleep?! book Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident looking for a therapist in perinatal mental health, email me about openings for private pay clients! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s topic is maternal near-miss. If that term is unfamiliar, please join us to learn more about this perinatal scenario that profoundly impacts many birthing people, their partners, and the future of their mental health, marriages, and families. Our guest shares her professional expertise and her personal experience with navigating pregnancy loss, postpartum hemorrhage, and postpartum anxiety. Since this is an intense topic, please judge for yourself whether you are ready to listen.  Tiffany Lowther is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Florida. She owns Lowther Counseling Services and is certified in Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Perinatal Mental Health. She specializes in supporting adults through pregnancy and postpartum mood and anxiety disorders, along with trauma and PTSD related to pregnancy, birth, and the postpartum.  Show Highlights: Tiffany’s journey leading to her specialization in perinatal mental health Explaining maternal near-miss: a life-threatening complication during pregnancy, childbirth, or up to 42 days postpartum, where a birthing person almost dies, but survives Don’t dismiss or ignore feelings that something is “off.” Racial disparity and medical bias need to be changed. Emotional impacts of maternal near-miss (on the birthing person AND the family) The range of complicated feelings with maternal near-miss Conflicting emotions when the partner has to take over for the mother The importance of men taking care of their own mental health, even though they may find it uncomfortable Avoidance, dismissal, and a hesitation to have more children after a maternal near-miss Turning toward each other with honesty and love–how it helps the relationship. Steps to healing after maternal near-miss: Reach out to your support system and the appropriate mental health professionals. Talk to others in support groups to find empowerment. Tell your story! It helps the healing process. Recall the beautiful parts of your story. Tiffany’s perspective: What mothers say about their healing, reconciliation, recovery, and relief after doing the hard work Tiffany’s advice for those who have been through a maternal near-miss and might want to have another child Resources: Connect with Tiffany Lowther: Website and Facebook Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident looking for a therapist in perinatal mental health, email me about openings for private pay clients! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today’s episode, I want to discuss the feeling many people have that “something’s not right,” but they may not have the words to articulate exactly what it is. That feeling can come during pregnancy or postpartum, and it can follow a loss or a grueling infertility journey. For the most part, when people don’t feel like themselves, they don’t have the language to express that they might have a perinatal mood and anxiety disorder. They may even internalize their feelings in extreme isolation and conclude that they are just “a bad parent.” I’m talking today about why people need space for their feelings, and above all, why they deserve to feel seen and heard. Join me! Show Highlights: Signs and symptoms of a mom who is suffering Be curious in your support of a new mom. Giving space for feelings and making someone feel seen and heard can make a HUGE difference. Examples of validating responses and resources that can be very helpful People have been dismissed and had their feelings minimized—even by their healthcare providers. Turning to the internet for validation is a natural step. Dr. Kat’s advice to those who want to help a new mom who is suffering Resources: Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

“I have to stop taking my mental health medications during pregnancy, right?” This question is a common one for pregnant moms, and the answer might surprise you. There are many misconceptions about medications during pregnancy, especially those for mental health conditions. Many moms have been misinformed about their available options, and today’s expert guest is here to set the record straight. If you are suffering from mental health conditions and are newly pregnant, it is essential to know your options. Join us to learn the risks and benefits of medications, what to look for in a provider who meets your needs, and much more.  Dr. Stacy Stuart is a board-certified Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner who obtained her Doctor of Nursing Practice degree from Auburn University and is currently in private practice, contracting with Revival Psychiatry in Athens, AL. She is married to her husband, Will, and is the proud mom of two kids, ages 8 and 6. In her free time, Dr. Stacy enjoys watching football, coordinating neighborhood events, and taking long naps with the family dog.  Show Highlights: Dr. Stacy’s path to her specialty practice and her current work Common misconceptions about medications during pregnancy It is important that medications are not abruptly stopped when someone becomes pregnant! The need to expedite patients’ appointments in a more timely manner Barriers that keep healthcare providers from feeling comfortable in supporting pregnant moms Dr. Stacy’s goal: providing education and information that opens up possibilities for people Tips for finding a psychiatric treatment provider Advocating for collaborative healthcare Dr. Stacy’s project: using the EPDS screening tool at 28 weeks of pregnancy Dr. Stacy’s wish for the future of reproductive psychiatry Today’s takeaway: “Mental health affects physical health. It cannot be set aside for 10 months.” Resources: Connect with Dr. Stacy Stuart: Website, Instagram, and Facebook Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident looking for a therapist in perinatal mental health, email me about openings for private pay clients! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today’s episode covers infertility and its impacts on a couple. We recognize that these challenges can be stressful on a relationship, and our goal is to provide as much support as possible to couples facing these scenarios. Join us to learn more! Rebecca Reddin is a psychologist, licensed marriage and family therapist, and certified perinatal mental health specialist with Postpartum Support International. She runs a private practice, Mindful Roots Counseling, and has worked for 15 years with individuals and couples within the tender transition to parenthood. She is the founder of The Perinatal Mental Health Institute, which provides education and training around mental health challenges to perinatal providers worldwide. Rebecca is a member of The Irish Fertility Counsellors Association and has specialized training in the unique impact of infertility and fertility challenges on relationship dynamics, believing that this is an essential part of perinatal work. She is a board member of the Psychological Society of Ireland’s Special Interest Group for Perinatal and Infant Mental Health and is Ireland’s Support Coordinator for Postpartum Support International. Rebecca is passionate about advancing support and advocacy for all those navigating the transition to parenthood.  Show Highlights: Foundational elements of infertility, which can be different for each couple The statistics: 1 in 6 individuals struggle with their fertility (Only about 10% will not be able to conceive after 2 years of trying naturally.) Defining infertility Testing for infertility (hormones, structural problems, and “unexplained” infertility) Issues Rebecca covers with her clients Feeling like infertility is “all my fault” The partner’s perspective on infertility Relationship success AFTER infertility challenges The differences in grief processes from person to person Benefits of couples counseling on an infertility journey The immense mental load of infertility (needs to be shared by both partners) Being proactive in protecting yourself and your relationship Rebecca’s suggestions to couples Resources: Connect with Rebecca Reddin: Website, Instagram, and LinkedIn Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms. Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident looking for a therapist in perinatal mental health, email me about openings for private pay clients! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

One goal of this podcast is to shed light on aspects of our self-perception that have been in the shadows. Moms often feel shamed and judgmental about discussing their feelings, and they frequently believe they are alone in their experiences. Therapy can be very helpful for a parent who feels overwhelmed and overloaded, because talking about issues helps develop coping skills to navigate their imperfect lives as they allow the healing process to begin. The pressure to “know everything” in motherhood can weigh a new mother down, especially if their mother instincts aren’t kicking in. There needs to be a greater understanding and compassion for mothers facing this challenge. Let’s unpack this topic in today’s episode. Show Highlights: Common socializations around motherhood and the mother instinct Pressures are NOT truths!  Events in our lives can greatly affect our mother instinct. Blanket generalizations about mother instincts are unfair. What we are leaving out is the mother’s FULL experience as a human. We need a new approach. Let’s take the pressure off new parents! What we can do to offer better support Resources: Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visit cdph.ca.gov Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.  You can also follow PSI on social media: Instagram, Facebook, and most other platforms Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! If you are a California resident looking for a therapist in perinatal mental health, email me about openings for private pay clients! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices