On the Couch with Carly

I sat down with Zakeeya Patel, actress, dancer, and storyteller, for a conversation that turned into something much deeper than I expected. Zakeeya is known for her vibrant energy on screen, but in this episode, she brings her full, unfiltered self to the couch. We spoke about how she learned to honor her intuition, navigate visibility as a woman of color in entertainment, and embrace the in-between spaces of identity, belonging, and purpose. We traced her journey from performer to seeker, from shaping characters on stage to shaping her own inner world. Zakeeya opened up about what it means to truly listen to the body, to hold both ambition and surrender, and to let life’s transitions refine rather than define you. What struck me most was her honesty about the cost of being “seen.” Behind the glamour lies the work of self-compassion, boundaries, and learning how to stay rooted when everything around you demands performance. Our conversation became a meditation on wholeness, how creativity, spirituality, and mental health intersect when we allow ourselves to be real, not just remarkable. Follow Zakeeya on: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ZakeeyaP/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/zakeeyapatel/?hl=en Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

I've been thinking about how being a psychologist and a parent at the same time is really hard. After 14 years of practice, I've heard so many stories of messed up childhoods and adults who resent their parents. Now when I'm parenting my own kids, I can almost anticipate which moments will become their therapy stories one day. That weight sits heavy. Then there's the comparison trap. My clients tell me about difficult parenting moments they feel ashamed of, and I'm sitting there thinking I would've handled that so much worse. They're describing what they consider their worst moments, and I'm realizing they're more patient and mindful than I am on a regular day. Beyond that, there's the emotional depletion. On days when I've seen lots of clients, I come home to my kids with so much less to offer them. They need emotional regulation, presence, patience, and some days I've already given all of that away. What bothers me most is how psychology has given us just enough information about early development to use it against ourselves. We know attachment matters, we know security matters, but instead of building support systems for parents, we've just raised the stakes and made everyone more perfectionistic. Every day feels like walking a tightrope where you're either building your child's security or destroying it, and that's way too much pressure to carry alone. Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

I sat down with Claire van Dyk, an HPCSA-registered counselor working for the Western Cape Department of Health, and honestly, this conversation shook me. Claire reached out to be on the podcast because she's passionate about having uncomfortable conversations about mental health care inequality in South Africa—and we went there. We traced how colonialism and apartheid created the massive discrepancy between private and public mental health services that we're still living with today. The numbers tell the story. One psychiatrist for every 3.3 million people in rural public areas, sometimes none at all. Eighty percent of our population depends on public healthcare, but only 5% of the health budget goes to mental health. Claire describes sessions in rooms without locks, folders going missing, months-long waiting lists, and cases far beyond what her scope technically covers. Not because she's overreaching, but because the need is that overwhelming. I told Claire I felt the same during my community service. We both trained as caring professionals wanting to help, then found ourselves trying to offer something meaningful in chaotic, under-resourced environments while clients dealt with ongoing trauma. We landed somewhere unexpected, though. Maybe the work isn't about having every clinical tool to fix everything. Maybe it's about being present with someone for 30 minutes who finally gets to be heard without judgment. We explored what's actually in our power versus what we have to accept as unresolvable, and why that's not the same as giving up. Follow Claire on: Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/claire-van-dyk-507aa9101/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/capetowncounsellor/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CapeTownCounsellor/ Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

This micro episode explores the psychological realities of having a baby through metaphors that make sense of experiences that often feel impossible to articulate. I compare having a baby to that nightmare where you're suddenly in an exam you haven't studied for, or realize you're naked in public - that sense of being woefully unprepared despite knowing this moment would come. I dive into why two particular emotions dominate the postpartum period but rarely get discussed: grief and shame. The grief comes from losing who you were and the life you had, which is natural and right, but completely unexpected. The shame emerges when we think struggling means we're failing as people, rather than simply learning something with an incredibly steep curve. Drawing on the reality that babies' cries literally hijack our nervous systems by design, I explore why having supportive people around makes such a difference, and how our modern isolated parenting differs dramatically from the community-based child-rearing humans evolved for. Sometimes understanding why something feels so hard can help us be gentler with ourselves through the process. Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

I'm joined by my friend Sindiso Nyoni, a renowned Zimbabwean graphic artist, illustrator, and activist whose work has been showcased from New York to Berlin. But today we're not talking about his international acclaim - we're diving deep into his experience as a hands-on father navigating an unexpected journey into primary caregiving. Sindiso shares the reality of becoming a father during COVID while his partner experienced severe postpartum depression. For two years, he took on what many would consider the "traditional maternal role" - night feeds, constant care, being the primary attachment figure. This experience challenged everything he thought he knew about fatherhood and masculinity in an African context. We explore how his brain literally changed through this intensive caregiving, softening his art from "edgy and rigid" to more considered and gentle. Sindiso reflects on the strange looks he gets changing his son's diaper in public, the politics of vulnerable masculinity, and how becoming a father shifted his artistic focus toward children's rights and global justice issues. This conversation touches on mental health stigma, the isolation of immigration, finding support systems, and how art became his lifeline through the chaos of early fatherhood. An honest look at modern masculinity, attachment, and the transformative power of showing up fully as a parent. Follow Sindiso on: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sindiso/?hl=en Website: https://studioriot.com/ Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

This micro episode is a fun experiment where I channel Bella Freud's "Fashion Neurosis" podcast to explore my own relationship with clothing and style. I dive into why fashion fascinates me as both a psychologist and a human being. I explore clothing as a form of creative expression - like collaging with objects, colors, textures, and forms. It's a sensory and sensual experience that connects us to our material existence in this world. Fashion becomes a way to communicate identity, show which groups we belong to, and sometimes shield vulnerable parts of ourselves that don't feel safe. I also confess to completely conforming to the psychologist stereotype of wearing lots of knitwear and cardigans. There's something about the maternal texture of knits - that cozy, warm embrace quality - that I hope translates into my therapeutic work. Sometimes embracing the superficial alongside the deep makes us more fully human. Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

In this episode, my guest is Amy Rogerson, a spiritual midwife, postpartum care provider, and creator of Mother Nurture - a woman who brings a uniquely powerful perspective to motherhood and maternal transformation. Amy describes herself as feeling "particularly feisty," and that energy radiates throughout our conversation about power, descent, and the revolutionary potential of mothers who refuse to martyr themselves. We dive deep into Amy's philosophy that motherhood should "ruin your life" - not as tragedy, but as necessary destruction that creates space for rebirth. She challenges the martyr mother narrative, explaining how this pattern serves wounds rather than children, and why the descent into darkness is as crucial as the ascent that follows. Drawing from Ayurvedic wisdom and natural cycles, Amy explains why honoring the first 40 days postpartum affects the next 40 years of a mother's life. Amy shares her own journey through addiction, depression, and alopecia alongside becoming a mother, and how this led her to create communities centered on seeing mothers, holding space, and accessing creative life force. We explore the paradox of motherhood, the ruthlessness required for authentic selfhood, and why a world of mothers claiming their full power would be a revolution the world isn't ready for. Follow Amy on: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/somaticsofspirit/ Substack: https://somaticsofspirit.substack.com/ Website: https://www.somaticsofspirit.com/ Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

This micro-episode came from two therapy conversations I had that hit on the same frustrating theme: the absolutely ridiculous and contradictory standards women are expected to live by. I had to share because if you're feeling exhausted trying to meet impossible expectations, you're not alone. First, the body bind: We're told that if we're "too sexy," we're asking for danger and assault, but if we don't have bodies that appeal to the male gaze, we're worthless. Second, the motherhood trap: Work too much and you're abandoning your children, but staying home makes you "privileged" and taking the easy way out. Either choice leaves us feeling not enough. I call bullshit on all of it. These are traps designed to keep us measuring ourselves against external standards instead of trusting our own sense of what's good for us. My challenge: Can you find your enoughness within yourself and give yourself permission to choose a direction without apologizing for it? Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

Disclaimer: This episode contains personal opinions and perspectives on complex geopolitical issues. These views are shared as part of an exploration of the psychological and emotional dimensions of identity, trauma, and human connection. This conversation is meant to provoke thought and empathy. Joseph Dana returns for a profound conversation about his recent piece "When But Becomes Now: The Unraveling of American Jewish Denial." After receiving a three-word email from a family member - "It's genocide now" - Joseph explores what this shift means for Jewish identity and our relationship to Zionism. We dive deep into the manufactured equation that has dominated Jewish life for 150 years: that questioning Israel equals betraying your people. Joseph traces how Zionist leaders like Jabotinsky literally described Jews as "ugly" and "disgusting," seeking to replace Jewish identity with European nationalism. We explore Rabbi Yaakov Shapiro's argument that Zionism is fundamentally antisemitic, designed to destroy traditional Jewish life centered on Torah and mitzvot. This conversation examines the emotional blackmail that has silenced Jewish moral voices, the way Israel claims to represent all Jews while conducting genocide, and why supporting Palestinian liberation isn't despite our Jewish values - but as their fullest expression. We discuss the financial and geopolitical interests keeping this system in place and why distinguishing Judaism from Zionism isn't academic but urgently necessary for Jewish survival. References: When But Becomes Now: The Unraveling of American Jewish Denial: https://josephdana.substack.com/p/when-but-becomes-now-the-unraveling The weight of history: How Holocaust trauma shapes Jewish responses to Israel: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3E1cyYzNFTn72PP39qfOoX?si=532c15c85b7e45a7 Follow Joseph Dana Substack: https://substack.com/@ibnezra Website: https://www.josephdana.org/about Twitter: https://x.com/ibnezra?lang=en Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ibnezra/reels/ Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

On behalf of women everywhere, this episode is dedicated to helping men understand why over 90% of women feel dissatisfied on special occasions like Mother's Day, birthdays, and anniversaries. Drawing from my clinical practice and conversations with clients and friends, I break down the five love languages framework as a practical tool for meaningful gift-giving. This isn't about expensive presents - it's about intention, effort, and showing that you've been paying attention. I walk through each love language with specific examples: the art of thoughtful gifting (beyond just buying something), creating quality time experiences, meaningful acts of service, physical touch that meets her actual needs, and words of affirmation that show you truly see her contributions. The episode includes practical tips like putting important dates in your calendar with advance alerts, understanding that preparation time is part of the gift, and why the entire day matters, not just one gesture. Essential listening for anyone who wants to show appreciation in ways that truly land. Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

I'm joined by Mayuri Govender-Jonck, lawyer, transformation specialist, and creator of Breaking Brown Silence, for a deeply honest conversation about the realities of early motherhood. Eight months into her journey as a mother, Mayuri shares how becoming a parent ignited an unstoppable fire within her to never abandon herself again. We dive into her traumatic pregnancy and birth experience - from bed rest at 20 weeks, to gestational diabetes, to her daughter's 5-week NICU stay where she wasn't allowed to latch for 3 weeks. Mayuri courageously shares the rage, powerlessness, and institutional trauma she faced, and how she ultimately had to fight the medical system to get her healthy baby discharged. This conversation explores the political nature of motherhood, the moral burden society places on women's bodies, and why motherhood can be the first visceral experience of oppression for many. We discuss the mammalian reality of pregnancy, the impossible standards women face, and how the fire that burns within mothers - despite systemic failures - reveals our untouchable strength. Follow Mayuri Govender-Jonck Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/may_be.hungry/ Linkedin: https://za.linkedin.com/in/mayuri-govender-30462b1b Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

I'm going solo today to talk about a book that has absolutely changed my life - Lucy Jones' "Matrescence." This is the book I wish someone had told me to read before I had my first baby seven years ago. I read it on holiday like a page-turner novel, completely captivated by how it put words to experiences I'd never been able to articulate. Matrescence is like adolescence - a profound metamorphosis involving massive neurological and hormonal changes. Lucy brilliantly compares it to a caterpillar in its cocoon, in that gooey phase where you're neither who you were nor who you're becoming. We understand and support teenagers through their transformation, but leave mothers to navigate an equally dramatic change alone. I explore why this concept should be part of every birth conversation, how we've misinterpreted attachment theory to pressure mothers even more, and why keeping another human alive is actually a massive psychological task. This gets political - it's about changing how society treats the most important work we do. Resources: Check Matrescence: On the Metamorphosis of Pregnancy, Childbirth and Motherhood by Lucy Jones: https://www.amazon.com/Matrescence-Childbirth-Motherhood-Lucy-Jones/dp/0593317319 Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

I need to tell you something that might surprise you - I'm pro-anger. When clients come to therapy saying they felt angry, I get excited because anger is information, and I want to understand what it's trying to tell us. Too many people walk into my office ashamed of their anger, wanting to "fix" it rather than understand it. In this episode, I break down my theory of the three types of anger. First, anger is a protective coating over vulnerable emotions, like a bodyguard when we're actually feeling small and scared. Second, boundary violation anger when our clearly expressed needs aren't met (hello, maternal rage). And third, righteous anger - that visceral response to injustice that moves us toward what's right. This isn't about encouraging aggression. It's about reclaiming anger as valid information that deserves our attention. Your anger has meaning - let's figure out what it's trying to say. Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

Artist, filmmaker, and producer Kunyalala Ndlovu joins me for a rich conversation about his journey into fatherhood and how it transformed his understanding of masculinity. Born in Zimbabwe and now based in London, Kunyalala shares his experience of being a full-time father for 18 months - something "completely unheard of" where he's from and "the least masculine thing you could do" according to traditional standards. We explore how becoming a father created an "incredible softening" that felt like walls breaking down inside him, leading to what his co-parent described as "fathering in the way you'd have liked to have been fathered." Kunyalala explores the distinction between humility and humiliation in parenting, the importance of empathy as the foundation of co-parenting relationships, and how art can transform narratives surrounding modern fatherhood. This conversation explores maternal gatekeeping, the significance of "time on the pitch" for fathers, and why he practices true 50/50 co-parenting—a rarity he has encountered. Essential listening for anyone interested in expanded definitions of masculinity and the creative potential of modern fatherhood. Follow Kunyalala Ndlovu: Website: https://www.kunyalala.co.uk/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fort_rixon_gram?igsh=Y21ybGFiaW85bzZ0 Linkedin: https://uk.linkedin.com/in/kunyalala-ndlovu-66b77126 Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

One of the most common struggles in my therapy practice: women who've been conditioned to believe they're responsible for managing everyone's emotions. Using real examples from relationships with new parents, I examine how societal conditioning creates automatic "yes" responses that ultimately harm both ourselves and our relationships. I share practical steps for recognizing burnout symptoms as boundary violations, the revolutionary power of pausing before saying yes, and why taking care of your own needs actually benefits everyone. I also demonstrate how over-functioning prevents others from developing their own capabilities and authentic relationships. This episode explains why boundaries aren't selfish - they're the foundation of safety in all relationships, including the therapeutic relationship. Essential listening for anyone who struggles with guilt around self-care or feels exhausted from constantly prioritizing others' comfort over their own wellbeing. Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

Disclaimer: This episode contains personal opinions and perspectives on complex geopolitical issues. The views expressed by the host and guest do not represent an official position on the Israel-Palestine conflict and are shared as part of an exploration of psychological and emotional dimensions of identity, trauma, and human connection. This conversation is meant to provoke thought and empathy rather than promote any particular political stance. In this thought-provoking episode, I speak with journalist and writer Joseph Dana about the nuanced relationship between Jewish identity, trauma, and Israel-Palestine. Joseph shares his personal journey from American Reform Judaism to Israeli immigration and eventual residence in Ramallah, offering unique insights as someone who has lived on both sides of the conflict. We explore how Holocaust trauma continues to shape modern Jewish identity, creating what Joseph describes as a "continuation of the Holocaust period" rather than a post-Holocaust era. This trauma response helps explain the powerful emotional connections many diaspora Jews feel toward Israel, even as the state pursues policies that may not serve Jewish safety worldwide. Joseph challenges the Zionist notion that Israel represents "the end of Jewish history," suggesting instead that we need to reconnect with the broader Jewish historical experience. This conversation examines identity, intergenerational trauma, and the possibility of finding common humanity across divides that often seem unbridgeable. Resources: Support humanitarian aid in Palestine: https://giftofthegivers.org/where-we-work/palestine/ Recommended Reading: A eulogy for Israeli activist Ezra Nawi: https://www.tabletmag.com/sections/israel-middle-east/articles/in-memory-ezra-nawi South African Jews and Palestine: https://newlinesmag.com/argument/south-africas-stance-on-palestine-opens-questions-about-apartheid-and-history/ The Crisis of Zionism: https://www.thenationalnews.com/arts-culture/books/the-crisis-of-zionism-undeterred-by-unavoidable-realities-1.439490 Follow Joseph Dana Website: https://www.josephdana.org/about Twitter: https://x.com/ibnezra?lang=en Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ibnezra/reels/ Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

In this heartfelt solo episode, I explore what we've lost in modern motherhood - the village, the tribe, the collective female support that once surrounded new mothers. Patriarchal systems have stripped value from traditionally feminine roles, leaving mothers isolated in their achievements and struggles. From my therapy practice, I witness mothers performing daily acts of heroism that go unseen: handling potty training disasters with grace, soothing babies while maintaining professional conversations. These "invisible" achievements deserve celebration. The problem isn't that we're worse at mothering than previous generations - it's that we lack the chorus of voices telling us we're doing well. This episode honors all mothers - those who struggled with infertility, NICU moms, those questioning their abilities, and everyone showing up daily for their children. Join the #MomTribe movement by acknowledging and celebrating the mothers in your lives. Join the Movement: Share your appreciation for a mother in your life with #MomTribe #OnTheCouchWithCarlyMomTribe Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

In this powerful episode, I sit down with artist, filmmaker and photographer Justice Mukheli, who I've followed for over 12 years. Known for his groundbreaking project "I See A Different You" which beautifully reshapes African narratives, Justice shares his transformative journey into fatherhood with his seven-month-old daughter. We explore how this experience has fundamentally changed him as a man and artist, challenging traditional ideas of masculinity and caregiving. Justice opens up about the reality behind the fantasy of parenthood - from the humbling experience of watching his wife's pregnancy to the intense mental load of caring for a newborn. He offers candid insights about the privilege of being a man in parenting, the challenges of balancing work with being present, and how his relationship with his daughter has influenced his creative work. His powerful perspective: "Do what feels right for you. Nothing is wrong." Follow Justice Mukheli: Website: https://www.justicemukheli.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/justicemukheli/?hl=en Enquiries: info@chilliartprojects.com / mukheli.justice@gmail.com Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/10155915628663643 Follow Carly on: Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw

After a period of reflection and growth, On the Couch with Carly returns on MAY 14, 2025, with fresh perspectives on mental health, relationships, and the messy parts of being human. On the Couch returns with three powerful episodes exploring fatherhood with Justice Mukheli, my solo episode on the collective experience of motherhood, and complex conversations about identity with Joseph Dana. Healing happens in relationships, not isolation. Until May 14th, please take good care of yourself. I can't wait to be back On the Couch with you again. Follow Carly on: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/ Apple Podcasts · Spotify

I'm noticing the amount of pressure our parenting generation is under. We are working harder as well as parenting harder than ever before. In addition, we are being expected to "end inter-generational trauma" by giving our children the kinds of emotional attunement many of us never got ourselves. This is hard and I caution against the messaging that this is something we can even do, especially in our own individual capacities. I also offer a solution, which I think it the only way to survive and thrive as a modern parent today. Parenting workshops