Sex and Psychology Podcast

Sugar dating is a type of transactional relationship in which sex and companionship are exchanged for some type of compensation. Reports suggest that there are millions of people engaging in this. In today’s show, we’re going to explore sugar dating relationships, including what draws people to it, the advantages and disadvantages of sugar dating, and who holds the power in a sugaring arrangement. I am joined once again by Kate Metcalfe, a clinical psychology PhD student at the University of Texas at Austin and a member of Dr. Cindy Meston’s Sexual Psychophysiology Laboratory. Kate’s research broadly focuses on sexual agency and motivation across different contexts and life stages. Some of the specific topics we explore include: How is sugar dating defined? Is it a form of sex work? Is sex always a component of sugar dating? What are sugar babies and benefactors looking for from these relationships? What are the biggest perceived benefits and drawbacks of sugar dating? Who do sugar babies and benefactors see as having more power in their relationship? You can connect with Kate on LinkedIn to stay updated on her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  While most dating apps are all about pursuing someone else, Feeld has carved out a space for you to find yourself. Explore your desires and go on a journey of self-discovery today with Feeld. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Think about the last few times you had sex. What was your main reason for doing it? There are myriad reasons that people report, including pleasure and horniness. However, a common motive that we don’t talk enough about is when people have sex out of a sense of duty or obligation. So let’s talk about “duty sex,” including who has it and what effects it has on people and their relationships. My guest today is Kate Metcalfe, a clinical psychology PhD student at the University of Texas at Austin and a member of Dr. Cindy Meston’s Sexual Psychophysiology Laboratory. Kate’s research broadly focuses on sexual agency and motivation across different contexts and life stages. Some of the specific topics we explore include: What does it mean to have “duty sex?” Who is most likely to engage in duty sex? How are sexual satisfaction and sexual pain related to duty sex? How might a history of nonconsensual sexual experiences contribute to duty sex? Is duty sex inherently bad? You can learn more about duty sex by reading Kate’s study that was recently published on the topic. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Tap into your natural sex appeal, attract the person you’re looking for, cultivate meaningful connections, and re-ignite the spark in your relationship with The Art of Sex Appeal class by Shan Boodram on Masterclass. Sex and Psychology listeners can get an additional 15% off any annual Masterclass membership at masterclass.com/sexandpsychology Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

If you could change one thing about your sex life, what would it be? In this episode, we’re discussing the biggest changes people want to make and the new things they want to try in bed based on insights from Arya’s new study of Couples and Intimacy Trends, which included data from more than 100,000 respondents. I am joined once again by Nicholas Velotta, a PhD student at the University of Washington who researches intimate relationships and sex. He is also the head of research at the couple’s wellness platform, Arya.fyi. You can find him online at mindonlove.com. Some of the specific topics we explore include: What do people wish was different about their sex lives? Why does it seem like everyone is having less sex than they used to? What are the most common new things people want to try sexually? Why is kink becoming more popular? How can we leverage technology to improve intimacy and enhance eroticism? You can check out Nicholas’ website to learn more about his work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Tap into your natural sex appeal, attract the person you’re looking for, cultivate meaningful connections, and re-ignite the spark in your relationship with The Art of Sex Appeal class by Shan Boodram on Masterclass. Sex and Psychology listeners can get an additional 15% off any annual Masterclass membership at masterclass.com/sexandpsychology The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

How would you describe your personality in the bedroom? What do you like to do sexually? What do you need from your partners? What turns you on? In today’s show, we’re going to explore erotic personas. New research based on a survey of more than 100,000 adults sheds light on the 4 main types of erotic personas that exist. My guest is Nicholas Velotta, a PhD student at the University of Washington who researches intimate relationships and sex. He is also the head of research at the couple’s wellness platform, Arya. You can find him online at mindonlove.com. Some of the specific topics we explore include: How is an “erotic persona” similar to or different from a love language? What are the main characteristics of each erotic persona? Is it possible to have more than one erotic persona? Can our persona change over time? Why do most people end up in relationships with partners who have different erotic personas? How do you maintain sexual compatibility when you and your partner have different erotic profiles? You can check out Nicholas’ website to learn more about his work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  While most dating apps are all about pursuing someone else, Feeld has carved out a space for you to find yourself. Explore your desires and go on a journey of self-discovery today with Feeld. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Persistent genital arousal disorder (PGAD) is one of the most distressing sexual dysfunctions. PGAD involves having near-constant feelings of unwanted arousal that make it difficult to concentrate, work, and sleep. In today’s show, we’re going to dive into what we know about PGAD and speak with a physician who frequently treats patients with this condition. I am joined once again by Dr. Sameena Rahman, a board-certified OB/GYN, sex-med gynecologist, and menopause specialist with an academic affiliation at Northwestern University’s Feinberg School of Medicine. She is the founder of the Center for Gynecology and Cosmetics, and host of the podcast Gyno Girl Presents: Sex, Drugs & Hormones. Some of the specific topics we explore include: What is persistent gentian arousal disorder? How is it clinically defined? What is it like to live with PGAD? How many people have PGAD, and who’s most likely to be affected? What’s the connection between obsessive-compulsive disorder and PGAD? What are the most effective treatments for this disorder? You can follow Sameena on Instagram to stay updated on her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  While most dating apps are all about pursuing someone else, Feeld has carved out a space for you to find yourself. Explore your desires and go on a journey of self-discovery today with Feeld. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Sex changes as we age. While these changes are often small and gradual, once you hit your 40s and 50s, it’s not uncommon to start noticing bigger changes. In this episode, we’re going to talk all about sex at midlife and some of the most common sexual issues that come up during this time for women, as well as tips for dealing with them. My guest today is Dr. Sameena Rahman, a board-certified OB/GYN, sex-med gynecologist, and menopause specialist with an academic affiliation at Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine. She is the founder of the Center for Gynecology and Cosmetics, and host of the podcast Gyno Girl Presents: Sex, Drugs & Hormones. Some of the specific topics we explore include: What are some of the most common sexual challenges faced by midlife women? Why is it so taboo to talk about midlife sexual distress? What do women need to know about how peri-menopause can affect your sex life? What are the most helpful strategies for improving sex at midlife? How can self-pleasure help in relieving peri-menopause symptoms? You can follow Sameena on Instagram to stay updated on her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

In the previous episode, we discussed the history of food and sex, which turns out to be a truly fascinating topic! Today, we’re diving even deeper into the subject. We’re going to explore how diet culture became a way of suppressing female pleasure, how interest in fine food came to be associated with being gay, why French food has a particularly strong association with sex, and more. I am joined once again by Rachel Hope Cleves, a professor of history at the University of Victoria and a member of the College of the Royal Society of Canada. She is the author of four award-winning nonfiction history books and one science fiction novel. Her latest book is titled “Lustful Appetites: An Intimate History of Good Food and Wicked Sex.” Some of the specific topics we explore include: Why did a woman’s appetite for food become a barometer for her sexuality? When did restaurants shift from being places people primarily went for sex to places people went for food? Where did the association between gay men and gourmet cooking come from? How did cooking become a tool for seduction? How is the connection between food and sex playing out today on social media? You can check out Rachel’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Have you ever noticed how good food and good sex just kind of go together? It turns out that this association goes back a really long time, so we’re going to dive into some of that fascinating history today. For example, I bet you didn’t know that the world’s first restaurants weren’t just places people went to eat–they were also places people went to have sex! My guest today is Rachel Hope Cleves, a professor of history at the University of Victoria and a member of the College of the Royal Society of Canada. She is the author of four award-winning nonfiction history books and one science fiction novel. Her latest book is titled “Lustful Appetites: An Intimate History of Good Food and Wicked Sex.” Some of the specific topics we explore include: How did people come to think that spicy food lead to sexual temptation? What’s the history of the restaurant as a place people originally visited for both food and sex? What kinds of aphrodisiacs did early restaurants serve? And why were these foods thought to increase sexual desire? How did early restaurants collaborate with sex workers to do business? Historically, how have restaurants used women’s sex appeal to increase business? You can check out Rachel’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  While most dating apps are all about pursuing someone else, Feeld has carved out a space for you to find yourself. Explore your desires and go on a journey of self-discovery today with Feeld. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. Practice love every day with Paired, the #1 app for couples. Download the app at paired.com/justin to get a 7-day free trial and 25% off if you sign up for a subscription. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

How do you define sexual pleasure? For some people, it simply means orgasm. But orgasm isn’t the only way we derive pleasure from sex! In this episode, we’re going to dive into the many and varied forms of sexual pleasure that exist, common barriers to experiencing pleasure, and how to get more pleasure from sex. We’ll also discuss tips for cultivating a more satisfying sex life. I am joined once again by Dr. Candice Nicole Hargons, an award-winning Associate Professor at Emory University’s Rollins School of Public Health, where she studies sexual wellness and liberation. With over 70 published articles, Dr. Hargons has made substantial contributions to the field. Her debut book titled, Good Sex, is now in print. Some of the specific topics we explore include: What all does sexual pleasure entail? What holds us back from experiencing sexual pleasure? Why don’t women have the same expectations of sexual pleasure as men? How is sexual satisfaction different from sexual pleasure? What are some of the factors that affect whether individual feel satisfied with their sex lives? You can check out Candice’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  While most dating apps are all about pursuing someone else, Feeld has carved out a space for you to find yourself. Explore your desires and go on a journey of self-discovery today with Feeld. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play. The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Let’s talk about orgasms! In today’s episode, we’re diving into a lot of interesting questions surrounding the big O. For example, who is responsible for your orgasm during sex: your partner or you? Also, is it ever OK to fake an orgasm? Additionally, we’ll explore strategies for having more orgasms if this is something you struggle with, as well as whether you can learn to be multiply-orgasmic. My guest is Dr. Candice Nicole Hargons, an award-winning Associate Professor at Emory University’s Rollins School of Public Health, where she studies sexual wellness and liberation. With over 70 published articles, Dr. Hargons has made substantial contributions to the field. Her debut book titled, Good Sex, is now in print. Some of the topics we address in this episode include: Are orgasms something that our partners “give” us? What do porn and popular media get wrong about how orgasms are portrayed? What are the most common reasons why people fake orgasms? How are orgasms defined scientifically? The goal of closing the orgasm gap is to achieve orgasm equity. But what does orgasm equity actually look like? You can check out Candice’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

A lot of the things you’ve probably learned about what healthy relationships look like are just plain wrong. In today’s show, we’re going to dive into what you really need to know. Some of the topics we’re going to explore include how to know whether a given relationship is right for you, how to avoid moving too fast, and the single best things you can do for your relationship health. I am joined once again by Claire Perelman, a Queer, Jewish Sex Therapist and Educator living and working in the Bay Area. Her work with clients, workshops, podcasts, and social media focuses on making sex education more accessible and normalizing sexual pleasure and play in people’s lives. You can find her on the socials at @sexclarified. Some of the topics we discuss include: Is a good relationship supposed to be hard or easy? Why is it unrealistic to expect a perfect sex life? What factors actually predict relationship satisfaction? How can we prioritize our relationships even when we’re busy? You can check out Claire’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Whether you consider yourself to be kinky or not, there’s a lot that all of us can learn from the kink community that could benefit our sex lives. Today, we’re going to explore five important things to know about cultivating safer, healthier, and more pleasurable sexual experiences. Along the way, we’re also going to dispel some common misconceptions about kink. My guest is Claire Perelman, a Queer, Jewish Sex Therapist and Educator living and working in the Bay Area. Her work with clients, workshops, podcasts, and social media focuses on making sex education more accessible and normalizing sexual pleasure and play in people’s lives. You can find her on the socials at @sexclarified. Some of the topics we address in this episode include: What are some of the biggest myths about the world of kink? What does negotiation during sex look like in practice? What is the importance of checking-in during sex and how do you go about this? How can we unburden ourselves of sexual shame and come to self-acceptance? If you’re looking to explore kink for the first time, what do you need to know? You can check out Claire’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

If you’re a long-time listener, you’ve probably heard me talk about my study abroad classes before. I take students all over the world to learn about sex and culture, and one of the many topics we explore is sexual fantasies, including how they are similar or different across cultures. For example, in my Amsterdam course, we hear from Marielle de Goede, who along with her colleagues at Company New Heroes conducted the largest ever study of sexual fantasies in the Netherlands and Belgium as part of a creative project titled Yes, Please! They interviewed over 400 people about their fantasies and subsequently published a Dutch-language book about their findings under the same name. This project also resulted in various theatre performances and a traveling erotic exhibition. The goal of the project was to celebrate the erotic imagination and to break the taboos surrounding our fantasies and sexuality by bringing together art, storytelling, and science. In today’s episode, we’re going to discuss Marielle’s project in more depth. Some of the topics we address include: How similar or different are sexual fantasy themes around the world? Why do Europeans seem to fantasize about cuckolding less than Americans? How might our political beliefs affect our fantasies? How do people feel about their sexual fantasies? What do we know about the origins of our fantasies? What’s the best way to share a fantasy with a partner? If you’re interested in learning more and joining me on a study abroad trip this year, this blog has the registration information for all of our locations this year — Amsterdam, Prague, Reykjavik, and Barcelona. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Practice love every day with Paired, the #1 app for couples. Download the app at paired.com/justin to get a 7-day free trial and 25% off if you sign up for a subscription. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Research finds that up to 25% of men experience sexual performance anxiety, which is just one of many types of anxiety that affect men in the bedroom. In this episode, we’re diving into men’s anxiety around sex and relationships, and how to deal with it. I am joined once again by David Khalili, a licensed marriage and family therapist, board-certified sexologist, and founder of Rouse Relational Wellness, a boutique couples and sex therapy center in San Francisco. He is author of the Mental Health Workbook for Men and Sex Worriers: A Mindfully Queer Guide to Men’s Anxiety Around Sex and Dating. Some of the topics we explore include: How does anxiety manifest in men’s sexual and romantic lives? How can men’s anxiety lead to boundary violations? How can men cope with anxiety about their own performance during sex? What are some ways men can learn to be more present during sex? How do you deal with anxiety around masculinity issues? You can check out David’s website to learn more. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

A growing number of men are experiencing mental health struggles. However, surveys from all around the world find that men are very reluctant to talk about their mental health. As a result, their mental health issues often go undiagnosed and untreated, and many turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms. In today’s show, we’re going to open up a conversation about men’s mental health. I am joined by David Khalili, a licensed marriage and family therapist, board-certified sexologist, and founder of Rouse Relational Wellness, a boutique couples and sex therapy center in San Francisco. He is author of the Mental Health Workbook for Men and Sex Worriers: A Mindfully Queer Guide to Men’s Anxiety Around Sex and Dating. Some of the topics we address in this episode include: How is mental health different from mental illness? What are some of the most common mental health concerns facing men today? What are some of the factors that contribute to men’s mental health concerns? What are some of the ways that a man’s mental health can affect his sex life? How can men cope with stress more effectively? You can check out David’s website to learn more. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

When it comes to how sex and sexuality are portrayed on screen, what does Hollywood get right and wrong? Let’s talk about it! I recently appeared on the Love Factually Podcast, hosted by my friends Paul Eastwick and Eli Finkel. They asked me to select a film about sex, so I picked the 2010 movie Easy A starring Emma Stone. We had a really fun conversation about it, so I wanted to share it with you today. Easy A covers a lot of timely themes, including sexual reputation, virginity, casual sex, and the sexual double standard. We discuss how this film handles them, what the science says about these topics, and also how our sexual culture has shifted since this film first came out. Some of the topics we explore include: Does the sexual double standard still exist for men and women? How is casual sex related to self-esteem? What does this movie get right and wrong about hookup culture? How do reputational concerns influence women’s interest in casual sex? I hope you enjoy this episode of the Love Factually podcast—and if you like what you hear, give Paul and Eli’s show a follow on Apple or Spotify. Have a sex question of your own? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

We are answering more of your sex questions in this show! We had a couple of fascinating questions that came through our listener voicemail that really stood out to me because I’ve never been asked about them before: Our first question is about what to do with sex toys you don’t want or need anymore. Can you recycle them? The answer is surprisingly complicated! The second question comes from a sex worker who wants to be open and honest with her kids about her work, so she’s looking for advice on how to have that conversation. To help me in answering these questions, Ashley Weller is back on the show. She is a Human Sexuality and Health Psychology Professor at Chapman University in Southern California. She also has a podcast called What’s Your Position that tackles issues surrounding sexuality, relationships, life, and love from a comedic yet educational point of view. Have a sex question of your own? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

In today’s show, we are answering more of your sex questions! We recently had two questions come through our podcast voicemail that center around navigating relationships where the partners are significantly different in terms of age, so that’s what we’re going to be talking about in this show. To help me in answering these questions, Ashley Weller is back on the podcast. She is a Human Sexuality and Health Psychology Professor at Chapman University in Southern California. She also runs her own podcast called What’s Your Position, which tackles issues surrounding sexuality, relationships, life, and love from a comedic yet educational point of view. Some of the topics we explore include: What counts as an “age-gap relationship” anyway? Why are age-gap relationships so stigmatized? If you’re in an age-gap relationship, how do you deal with all of the social judgment? How do you maintain a healthy and active sex life in an age-gap relationship when partners have different libidos? What are some of the most common challenges that come up in age-gap relationships? Have a sex question of your own? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

“The Five Love Languages” is one of the most popular self-help books on relationships ever written, and it’s often used in couples’ therapy. However, despite its massive popularity, there’s a surprising lack of research on the theory behind it. My guest today recently published a new study that tested some of its core ideas, and the findings may very well surprise you. I am joined by Dr. Sharon M. Flicker, a clinical psychologist who researches intimate relationships. She is licensed to practice psychology in New York and Pennsylvania, and is an Associate Professor of Psychology at California State University – Sacramento. Some of the topics we address in this episode include: What are the five love languages? Does everyone have a primary love language? Are people actually happier when their partner “speaks” their primary love language? Which love language is most strongly linked to relationship satisfaction? Is the love languages concept useful in sex and relationship therapy? You can check out Sharon’s website to learn more about her work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Sexual problems are common. So how do we fix them? In today’s episode, we’re going to dive into the Good Enough Sex Model. It’s a radically different way of thinking about sex that can help us both in preventing problems from emerging in the first place, as well as fixing problems when they appear. My guest is Dr. Barry McCarthy. He is an emeritus professor of psychology at American University and a certified couple’s therapist. He has published more than 150 academic papers and chapters, and has authored or co-authored 24 books. In 2016 he received the Masters and Johnson award for lifetime contributions to the sexuality field. Some of the topics we address in this episode include: Why do we need more than just medication when it comes to fixing sexual problems? What is the Good Enough Sex Model? How is it different from other forms of sex therapy? How can we set realistic expectations for resolving sexual problems? Why is playfulness such an important element of good sex? How can parters resolve disagreements about sex in a healthy way? You can check out Barry’s Psychology Today profile to read more of his work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University has been a trusted source for scientific knowledge and research on critical issues in sexuality, gender, and reproduction for over 75 years. Learn about more research and upcoming events at kinseyinstitute.org or look for them on social media @kinseyinstitute. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.