Navigating the world of dating and relationships as a sexual assault survivor presents unique challenges and opportunities for growth. In this episode, Shelly shares how her best advice for navigating dating and intimacy for those of you who have experienced sexual assault. She describes how to tell the difference between intuition and anxiety, explores the benefits of being single for healing, and how to recognize the difference between feelings rooted in past trauma versus present-day aware...
This episode covers all of my most frequently asked questions around how to prevent pregnancy. Especially with the results of the election, I know a lot of you are scared. In this episode I aim to empower you with knowledge in order to help you reduce anxiety and enhance your confidence as you manage your reproductive health. This episode covers the following FAQs I receive as a sex educator on TikTok: Effectiveness of condoms and why you should be using themPros and cons of the other ...
Ever wondered how understanding the menstrual cycle could be the secret key to unlocking the patterns in your mood, energy levels, and sex drive? This episode is your ultimate guide to decoding the four phases of the menstrual cycle and their profound effects on your daily life. From the low energy and low libido during the menstrual phase, to the peak energy and libido levels of ovulation, and the mood swings and low libido of the luteal phase, our menstrual cycle impacts intimacy in many wa...
In this episode we dissect the psychological impacts of ghosting and breadcrumbing, and what you can do if you experience them. I walk you through the difference between ghosting and breadcrumbing in terms of mental health and implications on your dating life, and how you can find empowerment through boundaries and healthy communication. We also talk about how situationships often include breadcrumbing, and ways you can learn to stop attracting these types of people into your dating life. At ...
“Codependency is a circular relationship in which one person needs the other person, who in turn, needs to be needed. The codependent person, known as ‘the giver,’ feels worthless unless they are needed by — and making sacrifices for — the enabler, otherwise known as ‘the taker.' — Dr Exelburg, Verywellmind Do you often feel you are giving more than your partner in relationships? Do you find yourself walking on eggshells, always being the one who apologizes first, feeling sorry for the othe...
Have you recently been through a situationship ending? Or maybe you're reflecting on past situationships? Or you can feel that the situationship you're in now has run its course? This episode is all about navigating the "breakup". Just because it wasn't a "real relationship" doesn't mean situationships aren't just as difficult, if not sometimes MORE difficult, to heal from after they end. In this episode, Shelly shares her personal stories from the 3 main situationships in her 20s, and how s...
This week's episode includes special guests Rowan and Cal, both queer, non-binary and trans, and polyamorous. They share their personal relationship story which began while Rowan was married, and share the unique challenges they've had and discoveries they've made together throughout their relationship. We dive deeply into the complexities, misconceptions and societal views surrounding polyamorous and queer relationships and identities. We examine the dynamics in both monogamous and po...
Do you feel like you mask your true self, just to fit in? Are you feeling frustrated and hurt by your dating experiences, but aren't sure how to change them? Join me as I share why letting go of shame is the key to finding a happier, healthier life, and the key to finding your soulmate. I share my experiences from high school, college, and my twenties, and how a sense of shame shaped my relationships and self-image in a negative way. I also share how my recent ADHD diagnosis was the key that ...
If you take one thing away from this episode, let it be this: PEOPLE CANNOT READ YOUR MIND! Ever expect your partner to magically read your mind, only to be met with disappointment? You're not alone. Drawing from my personal experiences and advice from my own therapy sessions, this episode covers the importance of communication within relationships and why it's crucial to bravely express our feelings and needs, instead of expecting others to just know them. I talk about how fear of the other...
Are you scrolling through dating apps feeling frustrated, lost, or even hopeless? I've been there too. From my initial hesitance to dive into the app-based dating world to the frustrations that followed, I’ll be sharing it all in this episode. It wasn’t all swiping left, though - I’ve made genuine connections, including meeting a close friend through a dating app. But finding ways to represent myself authentically on the apps brought its fair share of frustrations. In this episode I share my...
Have you ever considered how alcohol affects your dating experiences? Join me as I sit down with Julia, @that1soberfriend on TikTok and Instagram, for a revealing conversation on navigating dating and drinking in your 20s. We get honest about how we used to rely on alcohol to mask insecurities and lack of confidence, and how this habit can steer us towards wasted time, energy, and missed red flags. Hear our personal stories of how alcohol played a role in preventing us from being our unfilt...
Welcome to the Situationship to Soulmate podcast, your guide to navigating the complicated world of dating, relationships, and sex in your 20s. In today's episode I bring on my very first guest....my boyfriend Colin! As an interracial couple, we had to overcome both of our own preconceived notions and stereotypes about the idea of dating outside our own race, as well as push past the judgement and ignorance that is still alive in our society today. We've chosen to use our experie...
Struggling with setting boundaries in your relationships? You're not alone. I've been on this challenging journey myself, and I'm ready to share my personal experiences and lessons learned. We'll dive into the pivotal insights from Nedra Glover Tawab's book, "Set Boundaries, Find Peace," and discuss how these principles have been instrumental in understanding and addressing boundary issues in my own life, and could be for you too. We'll also examine the telltale signs that indicate you need t...
In this episode I'm tackling the popular and often controversial topic of men and women being "just friends." You've heard the idea that it's a "red flag" if he has a "girl best friend" or if he has a lot of female friendships. But is that idea actually based in reality or in your own insecurities or lack of trust in your relationship? I share how I navigated through my own insecurities and doubts when I started dating my boyfriend, who has many platonic friendships with women. This in...
Welcome to the Situationship to Soulmate podcast, your guide to navigating the complicated world of dating in your 20s. Have you ever stopped to question if Hookup Culture is truly fulfilling your deepest needs and desires? In this episode, I examine the evolution of hookup culture and its profound impact on our relationships, self-esteem, and personal boundaries. This episode includes a deep dive into the history of this cultural phenomenon, its evolution, and my personal experiences. ...
Welcome to the Situationship to Soulmate podcast, your guide to navigating the complicated world of dating in your 20s. In today's episode we tackle one of the biggest relationship questions: Do soulmates exist? What is the definition of a soulmate? What makes a relationship "perfect"? Are there any downsides to believing in the idea of soulmates? Shelly talks about her personal opinions and experiences with dating and relationships in her 20s, on her quest to find "The One." She shares he...
Welcome to the Situationship to Soulmate podcast, your guide to navigating the complicated world of dating in your 20s. I thought it would be fitting to begin this podcast with an episode all about situationships: the murky grey area between a casual hookup and a committed relationship. It’s something I struggled with throughout my 20s, and seemed to always put myself back into, even though I knew deep down I wanted a “real” relationship. If you can relate, you'll want to listen to this epi...
Ready to make 2025 the year you finally let go of constant anxiety and stress around sex and relationships? This episode dives into how stress and anxiety can disrupt our menstrual cycle, leading to fears around unplanned pregnancy. We explore the profound impact of anxiety on your relationships and sex life, offering insights on how becoming more educated and connecting to community and support can help you regain control and peace of mind. By connecting with supportive communities like my D...