Who Gets Love?? (Hosted by: Christal Clear & BJ)

Who Gets Love is a platform hosted by Christal Clear and BJ. Here, we ask one question that can be answered from two completely different perspectives. The question addresses your understanding and privilege within love. Two things we don't check within ourselves. This platform changes our minds and our relationships.

The Outcry (Final Draft)

The Outcry is a conversation about the expressions and communication of people in relationships. And those communications and expressions have traits that read in ways we don't comprehend correctly. This draft discusses that, and how our judgements impact the poor communications your partner doesn't even know they have. Perception is the weapon we use against our partner's lack of self awareness. So Christal and BJ discuss this. As The Outcry comes to an end, let us know what you thought about this conversation. This was a great dialogue.

04-18
27:10

The Outcry (Rough Draft 2)

The Outcry (Rough Draft 2) speaks about the softness of two people in a relationship. As well as how those soft sides can mislead your partner, based on how THEY perceive softness. There are many parallels to this idea...so WGL decided to discuss it openly. Typically, when we experience softness most is in the bedroom. And whether you know it or not, there are acts in the bedroom that act as examples to the very things people desire from the relationship overall. Softness is not a given. It's an activity we share in love. We discuss what it is, and what it means to us. We also demonstrate this concept, in and out of intimacy. Listen as we uncover the outcry for me softness with one another in The Outcry. Hope you all enjoy!

04-11
27:53

The Outcry (Rough Draft 1)

Here we have a conversation built around the discovery of Christal's intuitive abilities to see the undetected traits of people around her. And what she has noticed is the methods people are using to express the needs they currently have. In this conversation, titled The Outcry, we break down what a need sounds like today. The details that you now see when an expectation is made known. And how the actions we see from men and women don't line up with the request at hand. Let's get to the bottom of this one. Tune In!!!!

04-04
30:22

Why Can't You Hit Your Target (Final Draft)

Today is the finale of Why Can't You Hit Your Target. Christal and BJ discuss updating. Which has a duality to the average serial dater. Most commonly it means to reach higher than your current status or dealings. But almost never does it mean reevaluate yourself during and after each experience you have. Here we discuss how important updating is to nailing the targets you've been aiming at. Think of dating as a resume. The only way to gain better opportunities with this resume is to keep it updated with as much useful experience as you can. And today, dating prompts us to use this same theory as well. Consistent awareness to your growth and changes keeps your loved one in the know. Tune in to the final draft of Why Can't You Hit Your Target.

03-28
38:13

Why Can't You Hit Your Target (Rough Draft 3)

Have you ever considered the possibility of having too many options being the reason you can't make a choice? We examine the idea, as well as question the listener about whether or not you've solidified your standards. These, among other things, could be the reason that you can't hit what you are aiming at. This draft focuses on the discipline, decisiveness, and devotion you have to your personal wants and needs. Tune in to the latest draft of Why Can't You Hit Your Target?

03-21
28:28

Why Can't You Hit Your Target (Rough Draft 2)

Rough Draft 2 of Why Can't You Hit Your Target deals with your aim and accuracy when it comes to hitting your mark. We subtitle this conversation From First Love to First Love...which discusses the vast changes that occur from when you were introduced to your first love. As well as how much of a different person you are by the time you fall in love as an adult. Do you account for all the changes you have made for yourself when proclaiming your standards? And how is it that despite all the adjustments you've made as an individual...your standards weren't updated with your personal change? How does that even work? We examine the causes and effects in this conversation. Tune in!!!

03-07
31:02

Why Can't You Hit Your Target (Rough Draft 1)

Have you ever considered the possibility that the reason why love seems to suck so much is because you really don't know what you like? Today's draft examines this possibility. Titled Why Can't You Hit your Target?, Christal and BJ discuss the issues with adults making informed and concise decisions in who they pick. Are your standards based on who you truly find attractive? Or are you going for the opposite of who hurt you? Listen and find out how this even happens!

02-28
29:41

Push The Button (Final Draft)

We are finally here at the finale for Push The Button. Here we discuss the support you give for the friend who looks crazy, stupid, or plain dumb based on your standards, when it comes to cheating or betrayal. We don't see support often being shown in moments where our own beliefs don't align with the choices being made. So we discuss what it looks like to support someone for something you disagree with. Christal is more willing to sympathize here in this instance. Feeling like there has to be a shoulder to lean on for such a hard choice to stay with someone who betrays you. BJ, on the other hand, feels like you should have an understanding that this road is often less traveled. As well as taking full responsibility for the hard choice. Simply put...most of us, if not all of us, feel like we deserve more from our partners when it comes to infidelity. So to think that you should expect your support system to be dishonest with their beliefs just to support your decision is difficult to ask someone. And can sometimes create a tension amongst your support system, while the focus should be on your partner. How would you handle an instance like this where the odds are against you...and the only person who may understand you is YOU? because even your partner is removed from what you feel simply because they are hurting from actually hurting you. Very tough conversation to have. tune in and let us know what you think!

02-21
01:01:39

Push The Button (Rough Draft 2)

Rough Draft 2 of Push The Button deals with the emotions involved in choosing to stay with someone who has wronged you. The power in the choice you make can truly make or break you. Simply because it doesn't guarantee a change in behavior in the one who has cheated. Should there be consequences to the actions that serve as punishment? BJ thinks so. But Christal believes that there has to be another approach to fixing this issue. Listen as we discuss choosing to stay, and what that feels like. Some people think that staying with a cheater looks foolish. But there are some of us who believe that in order to hold someone accountable...you have to hold on to them to make them involve themselves in what it takes for you to heal. Which in some cases, many cheaters are not capable to do. But still, the choice is yours. So ask yourself...can cheating be fixed in your relationship, if it just so happens to happen to you? Let's discuss it together in the latest draft of Push The Button.

02-07
54:03

Push The Button (Rough Draft 1)

Who Gets Love is introducing their newest conversation titled Push The Button. This conversation is a very interesting approach to dealing with infidelity. Christal is at the forefront of this conversation delving into the ideas of how important confrontation is to the growth of the cheater and cheated on. BJ, on the other hand, feels that it's a great sign of disrespect to be stepped out on in such a way. So now, in order to get somewhere...buttons have to be pushed. And let me tell you...these buttons are hard to push. One button feels like your wrongs are constantly being smeared in your face. The other button feels like such a foolish choice to walk hand in hand with someone who just touched on someone else. We are truly affected by these buttons being pushed. But as adults, we still owe it to ourselves to find out the whys and hows of the hurts we experience, to find ways to deal and heal. Listen to this draft and tell us what you think!

01-31
36:06

Smell The Rain Coming (Final Draft)

The final draft of Smell the Rain Coming has arrived. The final draft speaks about self-inventory and accountability. The possibility of one being their own storm in life. Is it possible to be the cause and effect of your own love life? Thats what we discuss today. BJ and Christal discuss what it's like to smell yourself...which in the old days meant to be full of yourself. It is very possible to become that when you feel you should be exempt from what takes place (good or bad) in relationships. And because these experiences haven't settled with you yet, you bring about a gust or raging wind when you arrive. That sometimes indicates what your attitude or energy is about. You become the storm for others, based on the storms you've been through. Accountability is at the forefront of this conversation. Along with Christal's belief that it's important to be a storm sometimes for your own good. This final draft completes the cycle of life's experiences that you don't know how to prepare for. Take a listen and let us know what you think!!!

01-24
27:58

Smell The Rain Coming (Rough Draft 3)

Rough Draft 3 is our new draft that discusses your perception of storms you've yet to experience in life. Far too often we live vicariously through those we are close to. And without realizing it, we rob ourselves of our own personal experiences. We want to bring light to how good a teacher our personal experiences can be to the development of our love languages.  The subtitle of this conversation is called Weather Proofing Your Home...which is the analogy we use as a hedge against the energies that come against us when we choose to be positive in our actions and beliefs. There is always something that believes otherwise when we've made up our minds to believe such a thing as love. The question becomes: How do you believe in something you have never experienced personally, when the accounts of others prominently show a different chain of events opposite of what you've decided for yourself. Where does the faith come from? What will you use as inspiration to stay the course that you have set for yourself (That no one knows about but you). We have a very layered discussion about faith being accompanied with work to weather the storms we will face at the hands of love. Hope you enjoy today's draft. 

01-17
40:20

Smell The Rain Coming (Rough Draft 2)

Rough Draft 2 of Smell The Rain Coming deals with the beginning signs of storms that often go unnoticed. There are plenty of indications that serve as tell tales that go completely over our heads. And oftentimes we become upset with ourselves for what we've allowed, that we've seen all along. Which although we may have been wronged, we are still at fault for.  This draft discusses The Lawn You Don't Water , which serves as a sub title for todays draft. Christal and BJ discuss the importance of understanding the position you play in the issues and circumstances you are in. The detail it takes to survey your land. And lastly, the importance of being weatherproof of individual , as well as relationship storm warnings. This may seem over the head. but if you press play...it will all make sense in the end. Let us know what you think!!

01-10
28:17

Smell The Rain Coming (Rough Draft 1)

Who Gets Love bring a brand new conversation that deals with our instincts and intuitions. Titled Smell The Rain Coming, Christal and BJ discuss how are senses can assist in being proactive to our issues in relationships. There was a time when many believe to have had the ability to smell a storm in the air. Some of us still can smell the weather changes ahead just by getting a whiff of the outside air. But what about the air you breathe inside your home? Where are those same instincts and intuitions when the air is thick at home? Where are we in terms of sensibility in smelling the storms brewing with our partners? Tune in and tell us what you think!!! 

01-03
22:48

Wrong and Unsafe (Final Draft)

Here is the final draft of Wrong and Unsafe. Listen and tell us what you think. 

12-27
49:06

Wrong and Unsafe (Rough Draft 3)

Listen to Wrong and Unsafe Rough Draft 3! 

12-20
39:50

Wrong and Unsafe (Rough Draft 2)

This week's draft continues the conversation of topic, Wrong and Unsafe. This conversation intends on establishing grounds for people in question to find comfort in their realities. We discuss the responsibility it takes to become aware. As well as what has to happen for the people involved to be completely honest with one another. Which isn't always an easy task. Take a listen to this conversation and let us know what you think. Rough Draft 3 is around the corner! 

12-13
33:21

Wrong and Unsafe (Rough Draft 1)

How important is honesty to you in today's world? Is it imperative that those around you keep it real with you? Those are questions that NOW we question to even matter at this day and age. Considering the fact that living a lie is such a real thing today. Today, Who Gets Love is discussing the position of being insecure in yourself. And in the discussion, we dissect how incorrect our feelings and beliefs are to concepts (not necessarily character traits) we as people will believe without any inventory of self and others. What if the lie someone told you was their truth? Who determines the truth in this scenario? Listen to this latest draft. You will eventually see how shaky the grounds of keeping it real can be. Enjoy Wrong and Unsafe. Its a goodie!!!

12-06
30:40

Handsome Devil (Final Draft)

Today is the release of the Final Draft of Handsome Devil. This is a difficult conversation to have with yourself, and your partner. That conversation is when two people play a part in the current issues but can't defend their position at all. Normally, this happens when circumstances have reached a point of no return. How long do you continue to fight your demons before they kill you? That's primarily the question this conversation discusses. Christal and BJ challenge each other throughout the entire dialog. And in the end, a conclusion is made. Let us know what you think after you listen!!

11-29
43:59

Handsome Devil (Rough Draft 2)

Today's draft follows up on the conversation in Rough Draft 1, where BJ asked Christal..."how do you let a man know his promise, or potential, despite him not being the one you choose?' We discuss how hard it is to stay energized in dating, with little to no encouragement or context from the person on the other side of the table. And for men, the complex responses from women often leave us feeling like failures when we can't gauge our progress. So, instead of continuing to put forth genuine efforts...we begin to create strategies to beat the dating system. And that's when the devil gets busy.  We talk about the intentionality of women when it comes to a man having a few fumbles in the beginning stages. We also discuss the issues of men and their confidence to get the women they want. Should we show more grace to people who are a bit unsure how to approach us? Are you capable of rebounding, when you drop the ball with someone you like? These are concepts we tackle in the second draft of Handsome Devil.

11-22
28:50

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