In this episode we unpack Swiss Psychiatrist and Author Elisabeth Kubler-Ross's classic book "On Death and Dying" from 1969.

This book explores...

• The Fear of Death in the Modern Age


• The Five Stages of Grief


• Advice for Navigating the 5 Stages of Grief

Links to Reading & Articles mentioned

On Death and Dying by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

The Trauma of Birth by Otto Rank

Uses of the Erotic by Audrey Lorde 

Illness as Metaphor by Susan Sontag 

Empathy vs. Sympathy by Brene Brown (video)

*note* reading is not required to enjoy this episode!

Host: Zach Stehura  UnpackingIdeas.com

Guest: Andrea Dispenziere Psychology Today

Theme Music: Polyenso

Timestamps

00:00:00 Introduction 

00:02:58 Autumn’s Association with Death

00:06:15 Reminding Ourselves of our Mortality 

00:13:19 Fear of Death in the Modern Age

00:14:40 Decline in Infant Mortality 

00:17:25 Impersonal Treatment of Terminal Patients 

00:24:29 The Illusion of Control

00:25:39 Summary of Kubler-Ross’s Interview Project 

00:28:10 Verbal Ventilation 

00:28:59 Importance of Meaning/Purpose

00:33:38 Mourning the Loss of Certain Abilities before Death

00:36:42 The Five Stages of Grief

00:38:23 Stage 1: Denial

00:39:18 Euphemism 

00:40:51 Emotional Detachment 

00:46:00 The Stigma of Denial

00:48:50 The Last Stage of the 5 stages of grief is the First Step of the 12 steps Program 

00:50:05 The Link between Denial and Hope

00:52:16 Shock and Numbness 

00:53:22 The Connection between Isolation and Denial

00:55:24 Stage 2: Anger

00:55:29 Anger at God

00:57:06 Anger at Oneself

00:59:05 Victim Blaming

01:01:00 Anger at the Living

01:02:16 Stage 3: Bargaining 

01:02:54 Ambivalence 

01:04:50 Bargaining with God

01:05:43 Reneging on the “Agreement”

01:10:45 Stage 4: Depression 

01:10:49 Reactive vs. Preparatory Depression

01:12:47 Telling the Depressed Person to “Cheer Up”

01:14:15 Grieving your Anticipated Future 

01:18:49 Sitting with the Person in Whatever Stage They’re In

01:21:28 Stage 5: Acceptance 

01:21:36 Detaching from Life

01:22:30 Conflating Acceptance as “Quitting”

01:23:30 Difficulty Accepting Death in a Masculine Culture

01:25:57 Need for Solitude at End of Life

01:29:12 Kubler-Ross’s View of Death and Dying

01:30:30 Wrapping up/Outro