#69 - Retro PC Games
Update: 2025-08-25
Description
We didn’t want to say the funny number, so we flipped it upside down and called it 64! That spiraled into:
- Commodore 64 nostalgia (the games, the loading screens, the beige plastic smell)
- Oregon Trail dysentery trauma (plus: cholera, snakebites, broken wagon axles, and a suspicious number of “you have died” screens)
- Sled dogs with broken legs (and whether oxen can row if you shout at them through a megaphone)
From there, we take a long detour into the pixelated backroads of:
- RollerCoaster Tycoon (and the ethics of $25 bathrooms)
- Sid Meier’s Pirates! (the only game where you can dance, duel, and get scurvy in the same afternoon)
- Zoombinis (featuring the allergy wall, the pizza troll, and that smug little “yep, we solved it” walk)
- Secret of Monkey Island — including:
- the spitting contest,
- the rhyming insult sword fights,
- monkey kung fu,
- and the coffin salesman you can literally trap in a coffin (he’s fine)
We debate whether Guybrush Threepwood is immortal, whether the three-headed monkey is real, and whether Carmen Sandiego is secretly just a geography tutor with bad PR!
Also featuring:
- “It’s not your turn, my friend” frog (the original rage quit)
- Dabney Coleman’s extended video game universe
- Lode Runner monks
- And the eternal question: Did Hot Tub Time Machine rip off Rescue the Scientist… or was it the other way around?
Zinger count for this episode: at least 12, depending on whether you count “scurvy jokes” as zingers!
Comments
In Channel


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