SPEAKER 04 : <time>0:00 </time>

Well, a new fresh hell is just unlocked for your boy. Turns out I'm sleepwalking. I hate it. I don't know why I'm doing it. I haven't had any changes in medicine. As a matter of fact, I've got an appointment made with my general, and hopefully he's going to send me to a sleep specialist. It's only happened that I know of twice recently. But what's happened is I've found myself waking up and making food. Now, the very first time I did it, you'll hear me talking about me blaming something on the kids. Turned out it was me. And the second time, I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Guess what I don't like? Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Am I going to wake up in the middle of the night one night and find myself eating a can of cream of mushroom soup, something I hate? I don't know why the hell that I'm doing it. I've also heard some stories of some people that get rather voracious. violent in the middle of the night. They start breaking stuff. They start flipping over tables. They attack a spouse, yell at their kids. The ones that really freaked me out, you shared stories with us on the phone, on the text, on the tweets about waking up behind the wheel What's to prevent me from going downstairs, grabbing the keys to my Jones Genesis, and just hopping on Ritchie Highway and running red lights and doing donuts in a goddamn parking lot? This can't continue. It's probably because I have a very overactive mind. I need to quell it with the occasional generic CVS melatonin. But yeah, your boy's sleepwalking. So are you. What the hell are you doing when you do it on Behind the Curtain? Alan, you had left, I believe, by the time this all went down. I think he was gone, Joe Stamboni? Yes. The revelation of what had happened? Do you know about what happened to me in the middle of the night twice? I do.

SPEAKER 19 : <time>1:34 </time>

I actually heard it. The sleepwalk. Yes, the sleepwalking. I have been sleepwalking. Making of the peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

SPEAKER 04 : <time>1:39 </time>

I woke up in the middle of eating a sandwich that I don't remember making. And earlier in the week, I scolded the children unfairly. They have been apologized to for somebody making chicken tenders and leaving the bag of frozen chicken tenders out and leaving a little bit of a mess. Sure. Only to realize it had been me that did it. And I have been sleepwalking. Now, I don't believe I had an instance over the weekend. But it's going to happen again. And Josh Spiegel, from time to time, you'll bless us once, twice a year with Sleep Talk Audio, and it has never failed. So in an effort to sort of provide the way you provide with content, I have purchased, and it shows up, I believe, today, if not tomorrow, a 4K, 64-gig memory card, onboard, waterproof, night vision-capable trail camera. Oh, that I am going to set up. In my area just outside of my bedroom. Okay. To catch me on a trail cam. Oh, that's great. I'm going to catch myself. We're hunting Justin. Justin over here. You can see the tiny droppings from his small butthole. Check it back. Is this a deer walking down your hallway? No. Yes, I turn into a were-deer. I turn into a deer. I'm the least intimidating cryptid of all time. Yes, I have set up a going to set up once it arrives and it connects to my phone and it records. It's just basically like a ring doorbell. Sure. I actually thought about taking a ring doorbell. Unfortunately, I kind of affixed the things in place and I can't get them off now. I bought this one. It's not a very high end one. It's only like 50 bucks. I'm not buying like the creme de la creme. Sure. But yeah, I'm going to set up. A trail cam in my arcade at night, which is just going to catch me lurching out there to make falafel at one in the morning. Yeah, 410-338-1098. Were you ever a sleepwalker, Alan? We got too many calls last week to get them all. We're doing it again.

SPEAKER 19 : <time>3:41 </time>

No, no. I never sleptwalked. I do have this recurring dream where I feel like I'm getting up and going to the bathroom, and then I wake up all wet.

SPEAKER 15 : <time>3:54 </time>

Oh, God.

SPEAKER 19 : <time>3:54 </time>

No, you just wake up soaked in shit. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. No, I've never sleptwalked.

SPEAKER 15 : <time>4:01 </time>

No.

SPEAKER 19 : <time>4:01 </time>

When's the last time you went to bed? Oh, please.

SPEAKER 18 : <time>4:04 </time>

This year? As a kid?

SPEAKER 19 : <time>4:06 </time>

Yeah, I don't think I've... Age been more than a year? Yeah. Five years? Ten years? I don't know. Maybe 30 years? 40 years? I don't know. It's been a long time. I haven't wet the bed, like, since I was a child, I believe.

SPEAKER 04 : <time>4:19 </time>

Yeah, me too. Apparently I've been sleepwalking. I'm going to set up a trail cam. I didn't know the weekend. I was waiting. My son had some friends over, my stepson. I was like, I need you to wake me up if you see me. Or film me. And just film my stepdad. God, with my luck, I know I would walk upstairs. He and a bunch of his boys are watching a movie. I'm in my boxers. The barn door is open. Crank flapping out. Last time there's a sleepover. Yeah, last time I come to work because I'm now on an offender registry. So luckily, none of that happened. But I know it's going to happen again. It happens twice in one week. And questions were asked. Scott even asked, have I changed my medicine? No medicine changes, no dietary changes. That's what I'm bugged out about.

SPEAKER 19 : <time>5:07 </time>

You sa