After three blissful decades of avoiding the dating scene, I'm thrilled to announce my reluctant return to romance. Nothing says "catch me if you can" like someone who's been out of practice since the Clinton administration.

Apparently, my friends think I need "companionship" and "human connection." How quaint. So here I am, dusting off my flirting skills and pretending to understand modern dating apps. Because nothing could possibly go wrong with jumping back into a world where "Netflix and chill" has replaced actual conversation.

Wish me luck – I'll need it.

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