We've been trying to reach you with urgent news. You are the chosen recipient of a substantial cash prize worth $1,000,000 as part of our annual Worldwide Charitable Lottery Program! We are reaching out to you, as our previous emails seemed to have disappeared into the ether.

In order to claim your winnings, you simply need to provide the following information:

Your full nameYour complete addressYour date of birthYour phone numberYour penis length

This email is sent from a secure server and is in compliance with international lottery laws and regulations. Always remember: It's your information. Protect it.