Summary
Part two of Clark’s practical “Lessons Learned” series—from an old slide deck that still packs a punch. We cover why mission must lead your conversations, how to cultivate until the “yes” is likely, the art of listening (and how to measure it), why the case must be bigger than your organization, and the simple discipline of getting in the living room, not just the inbox.

What You’ll Learn

• Lead with mission, not programs: Define the problem you exist to solve; then show how your programs are the vehicle.

• Money isn’t the problem: Relational deficit > budget deficit. Build the relationship that makes the gift obvious.

• Change lives, not line items: Donors give to impact. Your job is to articulate how lives change uniquely through you.

• Listen like a pro: Aim to speak far less than you listen; measure it after each meeting to improve.

• Don’t be flippant with the ask: Cultivate and ask—don’t “just ask.” Ask when a “yes” is likely.

• Emotion moves big gifts: Logic opens the door; emotion carries the gift over the threshold.

• Meet with both spouses: If both aren’t in the room, your best arguments will go unanswered.

• Make the case bigger than your org: Community, nation, world—then your distinctive role.

• Treat giving as a habit to build: Start small with first-time or reluctant givers; grow over time.

• Recognition matters (even if it’s “no recognition”): Always ask and align.

• Choose the living room over lunch: Fewer interruptions, clearer decisions.

• Prior donors predict future gifts: Steward yesterday’s givers to cultivate tomorrow’s.

• Never take insiders for granted: Keep building the drama for board and volunteers, too.

• Do your homework: Know their giving, interests, and context before you meet.

• You must ask: After real cultivation, make the clear, specific ask.

Practical Tools

• Add this to every visit report: “% of time I talked vs. % donor talked.” What you measure improves.

• Pre-visit prep checklist: giving history, household context, mutual connections, LinkedIn scan, recent news.

Quotable Moments

• “Listen. Listen intently. Listen even more intently.” — Jerry Panas

• “I never give because there’s a need. I give because I’m interested and I believe I can make a real difference.” — as referenced in the episode

Related

• Lessons Learned in Major Gifts Fundraising (Part 1)

Links & Resources

• Major Gifts Fundraiser services and trainings: majorgiftsfundraiser.com

• Try the Clarkbot (AI coaching, prompts, and role-play): majorgiftsfundraiser.com

ContactHave a question or want feedback on an upcoming ask? Email Clark at Clark@MajorGiftsFundraiser.com.