Episode Summary:

In this deeply moving and practical episode, palliative care nurse Tammy Stokes shares how a personal health crisis at age 36—nearly 100% blockage in three arteries—transformed her career and mission in healthcare. Now an advocate and leader in palliative care in Tennessee, she brings firsthand experience and clinical insight to the often-avoided conversations about serious illness, family dynamics, and end-of-life care.

Tammy discusses:

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  The difference between palliative and hospice care

  
  


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  The emotional and spiritual impact of critical illness on patients and families

  
  


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  Why advanced care planning is essential—at any age

  
  


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  How her personal experiences with her father and brother shaped her philosophy of care

  
  


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  Tools from her book, including scripts to start hard conversations

  
  


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  The power of patient autonomy and how to honor it in clinical practice

  
  

Whether you’re a surgeon, nurse, or family caregiver, this episode equips you to lead hard conversations with courage, compassion, and clarity.

🧠 Key Topics:

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  [00:00 ] Introduction to Tammy Stokes and her book

  
  


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  [00:03 ] Her personal health crisis and its impact

  
  


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  [00:06 ] Transformation into a more compassionate nurse

  
  


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  [00:12 ] Transition into palliative care and first patient experience

  
  


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  [00:17 ] Scripts and strategies for difficult conversations

  
  


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  [00:22 ] Creating communication plans with patients and families

  
  


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  [00:31 ] Handling family disagreements and honoring patient wishes

  
  


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  [00:35 ] The case for early and ongoing advance care planning

  
  


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  [00:39 ] Real-life stories of honoring her father’s and brother’s end-of-life preferences

  
  

📘 Resources Mentioned:

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  Break the Silence: Health Conversations You Can’t Ignore by Tammy Stokes

  
  


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  Tennessee Palliative Care Advisory Council

  
  


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  Hospice and Palliative Care Nurses Association

  
  

📌 Takeaways:

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  Start the conversation before the crisis.

  
  


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  Honor what patients want, not what we fear.

  
  


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  Be vulnerable—it opens the door to trust and truth.

  
  


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  Scripts and structured communication can reduce fear and overwhelm.

  
  

🔗 Connect with Tammy:

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  Facebook: Tammy Stokes – Break the Silence: Health conversations you can't ignore, buy it here

  
  


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  Speaking engagements: Reach out via her Facebook page, Tammy Stokes Book Launch Party 8/1

  
  

🎧 Listen to More:

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