DiscoverThe Regulated MotherEp. 27 Reducing Holiday Triggers When You’re Parenting a PDA, High-Needs Child
Ep. 27 Reducing Holiday Triggers When You’re Parenting a PDA, High-Needs Child

Ep. 27 Reducing Holiday Triggers When You’re Parenting a PDA, High-Needs Child

Update: 2025-12-20
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The holidays can be one of the most triggering times of year when you’re parenting a PDA or high-needs child.

The longing for a beautiful, connected Christmas. The grief when reality looks nothing like you imagined. The pressure of family gatherings, expectations, and “making memories.” And the exhaustion of holding it all together while your nervous system is already stretched thin.

In this episode, I share my personal story of how the holidays slowly fell apart as my son’s PDA, OCD, and sensory needs intensified — and how that loss brought up deep grief, childhood conditioning, and nervous system activation I didn’t initially understand.

We’ll explore:

  • why the holidays activate grief, shame, and survival responses for parents of PDA kids

  • how childhood conditioning and holiday fantasies increase triggering

  • how allowance, letting go of expectations, and grieving losses reduce nervous system stress

  • how to approach family gatherings (or opt out) with less shame and more self-trust

  • and how to find glimmers and unexpected gifts in a simpler, lower-pressure season

This episode isn’t about making the holidays look better. It’s about helping you feel better — more grounded, regulated, and at peace — even when the season is messy, quiet, or very different than you hoped.


👉 Read the full blog that goes deeper into this topic here: www.illuminateu.ca/blog/reducing-holiday-triggers-when-you-re-parenting-a-pda-high-needs-child


🎁 Free support for parents of PDA & high-needs kids: If you want help building regulation and resilience beyond the holidays, download my free ebook + video series: 7 Steps to Regulated & Resilient Parenting, created specifically for parents of PDA and high-needs children.


👉 Get it here: www.illuminateu.ca/regulated-and-resilient-parenting

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Ep. 27 Reducing Holiday Triggers When You’re Parenting a PDA, High-Needs Child

Ep. 27 Reducing Holiday Triggers When You’re Parenting a PDA, High-Needs Child

Afshan Tafler