Quit Telling Your Kids “You’re Safe.” Teach Them How to Face Violence—Without Losing Their Humanity.

When your child sees a real shooting video or hears about school violence, the instinct is to soothe, distract, or promise safety. Matt & Alona push back. They show you how to sit in the fear together, regulate first, name what happened honestly, offer real empathy, and only then reassure—without false promises. They also tackle the deeper trap: how “us vs. them” language and dehumanization at home quietly trains kids to accept violence as normal. You’ll learn the simple cadence that calms bodies and brains (regulation → empathy → reassurance), and how to transform scary images and nightmares with co-created stories so your child regains a felt sense of safety. 

What might challenge you (and why you’ll want to listen):

• Your comfort narratives aren’t helping: “You’re safe” can backfire when kids just watched something terrifying—honest naming + co-regulation works better. 
• The enemy-making habit: labeling people “evil/jerks” teaches kids to dehumanize—and violence grows in that soil. Model feelings-and-needs language instead. 
• Rewriting the nightmare: Don’t suppress scary memories; add safety into the story so the body learns calm again. 

Have a Kinectin Account? Explore these Nudges to see how they apply to your own life — in a way only Amari can.

• Nudge: My child saw a violent clip online and keeps asking if it could happen to them. Help me co-regulate in the moment, name what happened without sugarcoating, and then guide me through empathy → reassurance so they feel safer in their body.

• Nudge: I catch myself venting with ‘us vs. them’ language in front of my kids. Coach me to translate that into feelings and needs, so I model dignity and reduce the pull toward hate.

What is Amari? webe Parents has partnered with Kinectin to bring you Amari, your personal AI coach. Now you can interact with the ideas from our podcasts, articles, and parenting tips — and Amari will help you apply them directly to your pesonal Life. Don't have a Kinectin Account? Create one here
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To learn more about what Alona & Matt are up to check us out at webeparents.com, or follow us on our socials at Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, or YouTube. Be sure to subscribe to webe Pärents wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts.