The war is internal, not technical.

Lessons From a Terrible Photographer is a book for creatives who feel stuck, burned out, or disconnected from their work, even though they know what they’re doing.

It’s not about gear or technique. It’s about the internal stuff no one talks about, and focusing on why we make work, not just how.

Preorders help determine the first print run. Copies ship once printing begins.

Preorder here:

https://www.terriblephotographer.com/the-book

You ever buy a twenty-two-dollar airport sandwich and convinced yourself it was worth it?

That’s what this week’s episode is about — except the sandwich is a photography competition.

In Gold Star, Patrick unpacks his love-hate relationship with the American Photographic Artists’ Untitled competition — and what it reveals about the creative world’s obsession with approval. From spreadsheets of judges to award-show absurdities like the Oscars and Grammys, this episode digs into why artists still crave validation from systems they don’t even believe in.

It’s funny, frustrated, and a little too honest — a meditation on why we keep chasing the gold stars that will never love us back.

Featuring a clip from Jim Carrey’s Golden Globes speech, a story about Patrick’s first Houston Addy Award, and a Light Leak that challenges you to make something that doesn’t need anyone’s permission to exist.

You’ll hear about:

• Why creative competitions feel like overpriced validation
• The psychology of approval and the decay of validation
• What Jim Carrey can teach us about artistic hunger
• How to stop mistaking opportunity for illusion
• Why the real reward is the right to keep doing the work

Mentioned in this episode:

• American Photographic Artists (APA Untitled Competition)
• Jim Carrey’s 2016 Golden Globes speech
• The Addy Awards (American Advertising Federation)
• Rick Rubin, Diane Arbus, Van Gogh, Tom Sachs

Light Leak: The Paradox of the Work

What if you stopped making work for judges, algorithms, and invisible audiences — and started making the thing that’s too honest to explain?