Episode Summary:

If you think your life is too far gone, or if you’ve made too many mistakes for God to redeem, you’re going to want to listen to today’s conversation: a Sacred Scar Story.

Julie knew she could spend the rest of her life in prison if she were caught crossing the border with four pounds of methamphetamine duct-taped to her waist. But life had become so overwhelming, so painful, that she no longer cared if she lived or died. So, she crossed over the border. And with her arrest as a drug smuggler that day, her years of running from responsibility -and from God - came to an end.

Through one miraculous event after another, God transformed Julie from drug dealer to Hope Dealer. In her book, All My Hope, Julie wrote “It takes courage to live beyond regrets, but the good news is that God wanted to take my mess and turn it into a miracle.” Join us on the podcast as we talk about Finding Hope After Addiction, Loss, and Imprisonment.

 

Quotables from the episode:

• I want you to know that nothing you face is impossible with God. NOTHING. The blood of Jesus has never lost its power.
• God takes our mess and turns it into a message for the world. You see, what looked like a loss was really a game, because when my leg was amputated, it was one thing that did actually send me spiraling further into addiction. In that spiraling, I ended up at the foot of the cross in the arms of Jesus. And it was in that place where I was so done with the pain and the suffering and the dumb decisions and the addiction that I was so desperate, I cried out to God to become the center of my life, or I was going to lose everything. I had lost a leg; you would think that was a lot. But I was on the way to losing my very soul and my very self.
• You don't realize that you're stepping into a trap of the enemy that is going to consume you and steal your identity and your very soul.
• Sin is enticing because sin feels good for a moment.
• My first use of drugs took me on a journey straight to hell on earth.
• Addiction runs rampant in my family on both sides. And so that first line of meth, it just had me hooked. Addiction took me further than I ever wanted to go and made me someone I never wanted to be because I ended up liking the feeling that I got when I snorted that meth so much that I would do anything. I would tell any lie, I would deceive my parents, I would tiptoe into their bedroom at night and steal $50 bills out of my dad's wallet while he slept, I would do anything for that feeling. And then that feeling doesn't last forever. I would mix it with alcohol and try to get this euphoric feeling and it was like chasing my tail. And meanwhile, I'm slowly like becoming more and more depraved.
• Addiction made me lose all of any sense of morals that I may have had, even as a non -Christian, even as somebody who wasn't living for Jesus.
• I felt the presence of God there, and in that moment and I believed in God I knew he was real and I even understood that he could see me and I think it's that little seed of faith right the Bible says that we are all born with a measure of faith and so with that measure of faith I believed in God and he was chasing me and in that moment, I felt like God told me you can't have one foot with me and one foot in the world. Well, I didn't even have one foot with him yet. That voice made me stop and really think, “Okay, I'm living this way, But God is calling me to a life with him.”
• Nobody ever starts off using a substance thinking, “Oh I want to become an addict.”
• That's the grip that addiction has. It's like an invisible hand around your throat. There's only one thing that can break the grip of addiction, and that is the love and the power and the blood of Jesus.
• After I lost my leg to amputation, and I just was getting more and more into a world of darkness and desperation. I took my little boy, and I moved across the country because I thought that if I could get away from the things that or hard and start over in a new place, that everything would change. The only problem was I was still there, and I was my biggest problem, but I didn't know it yet.
• When you're in addiction, there's all those wrong people and you flock together.
• I went home from that doctor's appointment in Mexico and I fell on my knees in this home that overlooked the ocean. And it was in that moment of desperation that I see all this time I had thought I was a victim of life and circumstances. I felt sorry for myself and poor me, all this stuff happened to me. And in that moment when I was so broken, it was like the Holy Spirit himself descended into my living room and pulled the blinders off my eyes. I understood in this holy moment that I was not a victim. I was a sinner in need of a savior. I realized in this holy moment that I was not a victim of life, but a sad or addiction. I was a sinner in need of a savior.
• I fell to my knees after that appointment in my home overlooking the ocean and in my strung-out depraved desperation when I felt the Holy Spirit descend in the living room I cried out to God, and I said “I can't meet you halfway. I can't stop drinking. I can't stop doing drugs. I need you to become the center of my life or I'm going to be lost forever.”
• Other inmates began to notice that the one-legged lady who passionately loved Jesus was working hard to keep her heart pure. Those inmates came to me and started asking me about this Jesus whom I loved so much.
• The joy on the inside of me was so infectious that everyone around me wanted some of it. Even the correctional officers started asking me about my experience with Jesus!
• It takes courage to live beyond regrets, but the good news is that God wanted to take my mess and turn it into a miracle.
• You will also need to be courageous, because life on earth is hard. You will experience loneliness, loss, temptation, rejection, and attacks. But do not fear, for I will be with you!
• When we’re determined to not allow our faith and our dreams to be crushed by regret, grief, and sorrow, God will be able to use our grief and sorrow to make us strong and increase our faith in Him.
• I would leave you listener with the perspective that when you think you are at rock bottom that is the place where Jesus if you cry out to him will come sweeping in because it was in that prison that a prison ministry volunteer walked in and told me that Jesus Christ loved me, died for my sin, and would make me a new creation, and it was in that prison that I put my hope in Jesus and became free on the inside for the very first time in my life. Rock Bottom is the place where Jesus will come rushing in and change everything. 

 

Scripture References:

• 2 Corinthians 5:16-17 “So we have stopped evaluating others from a human point of view. At one time we thought of Christ merely from a human point of view. How differently we know him now! This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”
• Hebrews 13:8 “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”
• 1 Corinthians 13:33 “Bad company corrupts good character.”

 

Recommended Resources: 

• All My Hope: A Prisoner No More by Julie Seals
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner AWSA 2024 Golden Scroll Christian Living Book of the Year and the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Christian Living and Non-Fiction categories
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises from God to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, AWSA Member of the Year, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the 2024 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in the Devotional category, the 2023 Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 1
• YouVersion Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day version 2
• Revive & Thrive Women’s Online Conference
• Revive & Thrive Summit 2
• Trusting God through Cancer Summit 1
• Trusting God through Cancer Summit 2
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: H