DiscoverReflective Parenting by Curious NeuronHow to connect with a child that shuts you down (without losing your cool)
How to connect with a child that shuts you down (without losing your cool)

How to connect with a child that shuts you down (without losing your cool)

Update: 2025-09-15
Share

Description

Send us a text

This episode will change how you see your child’s moods and how you respond to them.

If you’ve ever tiptoed around your child in the morning, worried the “wrong” cereal bowl or shirt will set off a meltdown, this conversation is for you.

Joining me is Dr. Alex Reed, pediatric clinical psychologist and mom of two, who has spent years helping families understand temperament, moodiness, and emotional regulation. Together, we pull back the curtain on what’s really happening when your child seems unpredictable, reactive, or even says, “I hate you.”

You’ll learn:

  • Why some kids seem “moody” from the start and what temperament really means.
  • The hidden role of shame in meltdowns (and why your child pushes you away even when you’re trying to help).
  • The front door vs. side door approach and why lecturing, correcting, or over-validating often backfires.
  • The science-backed strategies that actually work: modeling, storytelling, and overhearing.
  • How to set calm, clear boundaries without escalating the conflict.
  • The #1 skill you must practice first is your own regulation.

This is not about quick fixes or “tricks” for behavior. It’s about raising kids who can handle their big feelings, and parents who can show up with confidence, calm, and connection—even in the hardest moments.

By the end of this episode, you’ll have a new way to think about your child’s temperament, and practical steps you can use today to stop walking on eggshells.


Join the conversation about this episode on our private Facebook group:

https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10172344324640258&set=gm.1942367649950164&idorvanity=677093716477570

Read a science article about this:

Predicting child problem behaviour at school age: The role of maternal sensitivity, child temperament and theory of mind

Support the show

Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast

Learn how to become a Reflective Parent!

A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools.

https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/


Join the next FREE webinar about stress management and parenting:

https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b


Grab a Free Resource:


Email: info@curiousneuron.com

📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group

🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

Comments 
In Channel
loading
00:00
00:00
x

0.5x

0.8x

1.0x

1.25x

1.5x

2.0x

3.0x

Sleep Timer

Off

End of Episode

5 Minutes

10 Minutes

15 Minutes

30 Minutes

45 Minutes

60 Minutes

120 Minutes

How to connect with a child that shuts you down (without losing your cool)

How to connect with a child that shuts you down (without losing your cool)

Cindy Hovington, Ph.D.