DiscoverConfident Homeschool Mom PodcastHuman Development for Homeschool Moms: Realistic High School Expectations
Human Development for Homeschool Moms: Realistic High School Expectations

Human Development for Homeschool Moms: Realistic High School Expectations

Update: 2025-10-20
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Why knowing what’s “normal” at every stage transforms both your parenting and your teen’s high school transcript.


Understanding human development helps homeschool moms set realistic expectations that transform how you experience every stage of parenting—and it all clicks for me when my cousin Vicki Tillman, coach, counselor and podcaster at the Homeschool High School podcast explains the intersection between human development and high school expectations.


Understanding human development helps homeschool moms set realistic expectations that transform how you experience every stage of parenting—and it all clicks for me when my cousin Vicki Tillman, coach, counselor and podcaster at the Homeschool High School podcast explains the intersection between human development and high school expectations.


As homeschool moms, we’re feet on the ground in the human development process every single day. And when we understand child development from an academic perspective, suddenly those “difficult” moments with our kids become fascinating glimpses into normal, healthy growth. And also, we have so much more patience!


To top it off, this same knowledge can become one of the most valuable credits on your teen’s homeschool high school transcript—what Vicki calls a “sparkle credit” that colleges actually love to see.




<figure class="aligncenter size-large"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" width="1024" height="1024" src="https://capturingthecharmedlife.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/10/PODCAST-6-1-1024x1024.png" alt="The Moment Everything Changed
Understanding human development for homeschool moms means setting realistic expectations that transform how you experience every stage of parenting—and it all clicked for me when my friend Vicki Tillman said, "Look at them doing object permanence!" while watching her baby.
As homeschool moms, we're feet on the ground in the human development process every single day. But here's what most of us don't realize: when we understand child development from an academic perspective, suddenly those "difficult" moments become fascinating glimpses into normal, healthy growth.
And here's the bonus? This same knowledge can become one of the most valuable credits on your high school transcript—what Vicki calls a "sparkle credit" that colleges actually love to see.

Why Human Development Helps You Set Realistic Expectations
It's Development, Not Disrespect
Remember when your teenager suddenly started pushing back on everything? The curriculum they loved last year is now "boring." The family traditions they cherished feel "childish." Your first instinct might be to take it personally.
But here's what human development teaches us: this is individuation, and it's exactly what's supposed to happen.
When teens start expressing individual ideas and pushing back against the status quo, they're not being disrespectful—they're preparing for adulthood. They're learning to think independently and express themselves as unique individuals separate from their parents.
As Vicki Tillman, Licensed Professional Counselor and founder of Seven Sisters Homeschool, explains: "If we know that's normal, that teens are supposed to come up with ideas, individual ideas, individuating, then when they do that, we go, 'Oh look, they're preparing for adulthood' rather than 'Oh look, they're being sassy and I need to squash that completely.'"
When you understand human development, you can set realistic expectations instead of taking normal teenage behavior as a personal attack.

Realistic Expectations for Every Developmental Stage
How Developmental Context Changes Expectations
Human development gives us context for behavior that might otherwise drive us up the wall:
The five-year-old who insists they're always right? That's egocentrism—a normal cognitive stage where they literally can't see things from another perspective yet. Understanding this helps you set realistic expectations for their empathy and reasoning abilities.
The two-year-old's constant "no"? That's autonomy development—they're learning they're separate people with their own will. This isn't defiance you need to crush; it's identity formation you need to guide.
The teenager standing in a thunderstorm because it's fun? That's logic development still in process. Even if you covered weather safety in your homeschool curriculum, their developing brain can let fun override logic in the moment.
Your aging parents telling the same stories repeatedly? That's the reflective phase of adult development—looking back to evaluate life's meaning.
When you know these stages, you can train and guide appropriately rather than constantly feeling frustrated by unrealistic expectations.

Real-Life Example: Setting Realistic Expectations Through the Thunderstorm Story
Vicki shared a perfect example from her own homeschooling journey that illustrates why understanding human development helps set realistic expectations.
One rainy night, she drove up to pick her son up from choir practice. There was lightning, it was pouring, and there was one kid standing outside enjoying the storm—her kid.
They'd done a weather unit. They'd covered thunderstorm safety. But in that moment, the logic of what he learned didn't apply because the fun of being in the rain overrode everything else.
"That was not a good decision," Vicki admits, "but I also understood it in context of his logic was not on at that moment. It got overrun by fun."
The result? Instead of an angry confrontation about "weren't you listening in class," there was understanding paired with appropriate guidance. And fortunately, no lightning strikes.
Today, that son is a middle school teacher who keeps his students indoors during thunderstorms—because his logic development completed, just like it was supposed to. Understanding human development helped his mom set realistic expectations for where he was developmentally, not where she wished he was.

Realistic Expectations for High School Students
High School Teens: The Individuation Phase
High school students are in identity formation mode. Understanding this developmental stage helps you set realistic expectations for their behavior:
One week they love this fashion, the next week it's out. This isn't fickleness—it's identity exploration.
Last year's favorite curriculum might be this year's nightmare. They're individuating and discovering what resonates with their developing sense of self.
Friends' opinions suddenly matter intensely. Peers play a crucial role in healthy identity development during adolescence.
Realistic expectation: You'll need to "graciously adjust and help them learn how to understand themselves," as Vicki puts it. Flexibility isn't failure—it's meeting them where they are developmentally.
Elementary Children: Realistic Expectations for Logic Development
Those late elementary kids are learning to think in more complex ways and use logic in ways they couldn't before. This is wonderful—and it also means they'll sometimes make mistakes as they test out their developing reasoning skills.
Realistic expectation: They're scientists experimenting with cause and effect. Sometimes the experiment fails spectacularly. That's learning, not failure.
Homeschool Moms: Setting Realistic Expectations for Yourself
If you're in middle age, you're likely in the generative phase. You want to create, accomplish, show something for why you're here. That Type-A tendency to generate curriculum, start businesses, learn new skills? That's developmentally normal.
Then comes the reflective phase, where you think back on moments—"Oh, that was a good moment. We did that one right. Or oh no, I screwed up my kids' entire lives."
Realistic expectation: You're human too, going through your own developmental stages. Understanding this helps you set realistic expectations for yourself, not just your children.

Why Human Development Makes an Excellent High School Course
What Makes a Sparkle Credit for High School?
Understanding human development isn't just helpful for moms setting realistic expectations—it's an incredible "sparkle credit" for your high school transcript.
A sparkle credit is a course that shows breadth beyond core academics. Colleges love to see students who explored topics of interest or usefulness, not just generic requirements.
Different Purposes for Different Students
For teens interested in psychology or social sciences: Human development becomes career exploration. It shows admissions officers this student has depth of interest in their chosen field.
For teens heading straight to work or trade school: It's practical life skills that will serve them in any career involving people (which is most careers).
For any teen who will eventually work with others: It's invaluable preparation for understanding human behavior and relationships.
Real-World High School Benefits
When high school students understand human development, they can:

Make sense of their younger siblings' "irritating" behaviors
Understand why their friends' opinions suddenly matter so much
Recognize their own identity formation process
Become better babysitters (understanding why that nine-month-old throws everything on the floor)
Navigate relationships with more wisdom and grace
Set realistic expectations for themselves and others


How to Add Human Development to Your High School Transcript
Earning Credit: Multiple Approaches
Standard textbook approach: Most high school textbooks equal one credit. Seven Sisters offers a human development textbook designed for average high schoolers (level two credit) that covers the complete scope and sequence.
Honors level: Ad
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Human Development for Homeschool Moms: Realistic High School Expectations

Human Development for Homeschool Moms: Realistic High School Expectations