I'm Not Always Regulated — And That's Actually the Point Ep 102
Update: 2025-09-25
Description
Let’s kill the myth that nervous system regulation = being calm, composed, and permanently zen.
In this raw and real episode, I’m telling the truth about emotional regulation — including a moment I nearly spiraled into a full-blown panic attack. Spoiler: I didn’t. But only because I stopped performing calm and started practicing honesty.
Because regulation isn’t a performance. It’s a practice. And it starts with telling the truth about where you actually are.
🔥 In this episode:
- What nervous system dysregulation really looks like (and how to spot it)
- The difference between reacting vs. responding — and why it matters
- Why emotional honesty (not perfection) is the key to true self-regulation
- The soap opera in your head: how to turn down the volume on mental spirals
- Saboteurs: the Judge, Victim, and Controller (and how they hijack your nervous system)
- The power of regulating out loud in your relationships
- How to own your part, repair with integrity, and move forward without shame
🔥 I also share:
- A very real fight I had with my husband (and what regulation looked like in the moment)
- The messy-but-effective tools I use to move from panic to presence
- What it actually means to separate you from the pattern you're in
🔥 Key Questions to Ask Yourself:
- What does dysregulation look like for you?
- Where are you still performing “calm” instead of practicing honesty?
- What’s your go-to saboteur — and how does it show up in your body?
🛠️ Your Next Steps:
- Drop the performance — and practice emotional truth instead
- Learn to name your pattern while you're in it
- Regulate out loud with people you trust
- Own your part and repair without spiraling into shame
You can find more resources and ways to work with me at kayaramjee.com
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