“My grandmother Carmela was my North Star, my safe port in many childhood storms.Strong. Independent. She swept the snow from her sidewalk wearing only a sweater, made her own wine, canned her own tomatoes, strung her own peppers to dry in the basement, and found edible dandelions for salads in the yard. She was the matriarch of la famiglia, whose grown sons stopped by every night after work to eat at her table before going to their own homes to eat again. She couldn’t read or write—not in Italian, not in English—but she was the smartest person I knew. She taught me how to eat pasta, how to cook, how to pray, and how to protect those I love.” Libby Cataldi, It Takes a Lifetime to Learn How to Live: An Italian American story of coming home.

Join me and my guest, Italian American author Libby Cataldi, for a heartfelt chat about her new memoir, It Takes a Lifetime to Learn How to Live. The book, and our conversation, touch on universal themes such as the immigrant experience in America, generational trauma, mother-daughter relationships, family secrets, sacrifice, the subjugation of women, love, and forgiveness. Libby and I speak about the disconnect between the real Italy and the imagined one and her first encounter with the country and with Rotondella, her remote ancestral village in Basilicata, where she went “to connect with the grandmother who loved me and to understand the mother who couldn’t.” 

Libby beautifully recounts this mysterious place that ultimately provided her with answers about her family heritage, relationships, and herself. We converse about food as “a legacy of love, culture and tradition,” language and the chasm between regional dialects and standard Italian, how dialect both shrouds and reveals, and the reality of Italy’s Mezzogiorno, a still much-misunderstood part of the world.

The episode centers on Libby’s Italian Americanness and how her upbringing and heritage shaped the person she is today; how, in her words, “by risking a solitary journey to Italy, I found strength—and in doing so, I found the grace to forgive my mother, help my son, and save myself.”

Libby Cataldi Biography 

Born in Pittsburgh, I grew up in an Italian family and surrounded by an Italian community. My early years were steeped in faith as I attended St. Mary’s Elementary School and Canevin Catholic High School. My dad, the patriarch of the family, dictated that I could attend college only if I majored in education or nursing, so I entered Indiana University of Pennsylvania and earned a Bachelor’s Degree in Education. A year later, I applied for and received an internship position at the University of Pittsburgh where I earned both a Master’s and Doctorate. For seventeen years, I was Head of The Calverton School, an independent day school in Maryland. 

Links

https://libbycataldi.com/

https://www.facebook.com/libby.cataldi

Get the Book!

https://asterismbooks.com/product/it-takes-a-lifetime-to-learn-how-to-live

https://bookshop.org/p/books/it-takes-a-lifetime-to-learn-how-to-live-an-italian-american-story-of-coming-home-libby-cataldi/c9bb85ab83b08019?ean=9781599542393&next=t&next=t

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/it-takes-a-lifetime-to-learn-how-to-live-libby-cataldi/1148082386?ean=9781599542393

https://www.amazon.com/Takes-Lifetime-Learn-How-Live/dp/1599542390/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3WYIFBJGCPVL&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.1YlwgQ3Oy3DTRU9Fr9vSVtlSOaE7s4TIRNiJ0NFmSo3GjHj071QN20LucGBJIEps.3a1rnrDerwSTrpcXk9oshHsTmtur52MgQZ-MAayrF-U&dib_tag=se&keywords=libby+cataldi&qid=1756998445&sprefix=libby+cat%2Caps%2C77&sr=8-1

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Podcast Producer: Andrew Niklas Curtis 

Production Intern: Jasmine Kim

Recorded at Faminore Sound Agency, Post-production: Lorenzo Maiani