In this episode, Liza Walter shares her journey of reproductive loss which includes a long fertility journey, miscarriage and surrogacy. She also describes the beautiful, yet heart wrenching, birth of her son, Levi, who was stillborn at 34 weeks. As we come to understand the lengths Liza and her partner Jaye went to to become parents, we learn that not every reproductive journey ends with parenting a living child. We also hear from Courtney Handja, a registered clinical counsellor, who specializes in supporting 2SLGBTQIA+ individuals through reproduction and loss. Courtney shares what meaningful, inclusive care looks like, and why it’s so urgently needed.

Key Insights

[4:16 ] “I was diagnosed with PCOS...”

• Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) is a common hormonal condition which causes an imbalance of hormones (often insulin and testosterone). This affects the functioning of the ovaries, metabolic health, and sometimes mood.

[4:25 ] “But eventually, after multiple failed IUIs, I got pregnant.”

• In Intrauterine Insemination (IUI), a doctor takes specially prepared sperm and places it directly into the uterus around the time the ovary releases an egg, to increase the chances of fertilization.

[9:45 ] “The obstetrician came and told us that he was diagnosed with Trisomy 13...”

• Trisomy 13 is a rare and serious genetic disorder in which individuals have three copies of chromosome 13 instead of two, often due to a random error during the formation of reproductive cells. Trisomy 13 is usually fatal at or soon after birth.

[23:20 ] “the number of folks who have babies in the queer community is less than it is among cishet folks.”

• “Cishet” is an informal term for people who are both cisgender and heterosexual. “Cisgender” describes people whose gender aligns with the sex they were assigned at birth. “Heterosexual” describes those who are attracted to people of the opposite sex.

[26:32 ] “...each of those embryos resulted in either a chemical pregnancy or a negative pregnancy test.”

• A chemical pregnancy is an early pregnancy loss that can be detected by a blood or urine test, but it is too early for an ultrasound to show a developing embryo.

[29:52 ] “I did that through my work with advocating for the Bill 141...”

• Bill 141 - Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness, Research and Care Act, 2015, was enacted to address the emotional, medical, and social aspects of pregnancy loss and infant death.

[30:05 ] “I became an educator for PAIL in 2015”

• The Pregnancy and Infant Loss (PAIL) Network is a program in Ontario, Canada, dedicated to supporting families who have experienced pregnancy loss or the death of an infant.

Resources

General

• Return to Zero HOPE: Resources for LGBTQ+ Families
• Companion Website: LGBTQ+ Reproductive Loss
• Words of Advice: LGBTQ+ Reproductive Loss

Magazines and stories

• Pregnancy After Loss Support
• USA Based: Resources on pregnancy loss, stillbirth and infant loss for LGBTQ+ parents
• USA Based: Empty Arms Bereavement/LGBTQ Resources
• Sue Ryder: Supporting the LGBTQ+ community through grief and bereavement
• Digital collages for parents and support people

Books

• Reproductive Losses: Challenges to LGBTQ Family-Making

Podcasts

• River’s Story, Lesbian Parenting and Travelling with Grief with Jaimie-Lee Roy

Academic articles

• Stories of Grief and Hope: Queer Experiences of Reproductive Loss
• Breaking the Silence: Infertility, Motherhood, and Queer Culture
• LGBTQ+ individuals and pregnancy outcomes: A commentary

Videos

• Loss in the LGBTQ+ Community
• Trans and Gender Diverse Family Building for Providers