Why does romance always get the spotlight—and everyone else becomes the understudy?

In this spicy episode, I sit down with the brilliant Adam Fitzgerald to take a sledgehammer to relationship hierarchy—that cultural obsession with putting your romantic partner above all else. We unpack how this model often leads to co-dependency, unrealistic expectations, and emotional burnout.

But here’s the truth: healthy relationships don’t happen in isolation. They need community—the friendships, chosen family, and support systems that queer folks have long known are essential to thriving love and intimacy.

Adam brings a powerful lens to how queer relationships challenge the default and lean into non-hierarchical structures that center freedom, autonomy, and deep connection across many forms.

This one’s for anyone ready to build love that’s grounded, expansive, and rooted in more than just one person.

Because love without the ladder?That’s where the good stuff lives.

Chapters

00:00 Happy Pride Month and Intro

02:53 Understanding Relationship Hierarchy

07:10 Exploring Codependency

10:20 The Impact of Codependency on Relationships

12:16 Correlation Between Relationship Hierarchy and Codependency

12:46 Navigating Loneliness in Relationships

14:12 The Importance of Maintaining Individuality

15:29 Compassion and Self-Discovery

17:27 Understanding Codependency

18:08 Queerness and Relationship Structures

21:00 Breaking Down Relationship Hierarchies

23:17 Exploring Non-Traditional Relationships

27:41 The Role of Community in Healthy Relationships

30:52 Understanding Healing and Triggers

32:34 Navigating Codependency and Interdependence

35:05 Building Community Beyond Relationships

39:29 Self-Reflection in Relationship Dynamics

40:16 Exploring Alternative Relationship Structures

46:45 Embracing Queer Joy

47:41 Navigating New Queerness

48:20 Defining Queer Identity

50:02 Coming to Completion AKA Just So We're Queer

52:00 Come Again, Come Again, Come Again

Connect with Adam Fitzgerald

https://www.instagram.com/directorfitz1

https://www.adamsexcoach.com

Connect with Come Talk with Aimee

https://www.cometalkwithaimee.com

https://www.instagram.com/cometalkwithaimee

https://www.tiktok.com/@cometalkwithaimee

https://www.youtube.com/@cometalkwithaimee