Trigger warning/disclaimer: This episode contains discussions about death, including personal experiences and journeys. The content may be emotionally intense and could be triggering for some individuals. If you find these discussions distressing, it may be advisable to skip this episode or listen with caution. Remember to prioritize your mental and emotional well-being.

“And so she (our daughter Anna who was nearly her college graduation) signed off her Facebook that morning with four words, “getting near the end.” That evening there was a knock on the door and two men dressed in black were standing there. It was the coroner and a deputy sheriff. That was their uniform. I didn't know who they were. I thought they were police. I thought they were fundraising…”

-       Cathy Harvey, creator of “from Cathy's Heart”, memoir author, and today’s guest on Fierce Conversation with Toby.

 Head to https://www.youtube.com/@fierceconversationswithtoby to find all video interviews!

 Transcripts available at https://tobydorr.com/podcast-schedule/

 Some of our fierce topics today:

 [11:32 ] Your daughter was riding her bike on Highway 45 and was hit by a car and killed.

[14:13 ] And I thought about the girls. They got on the bus this morning with a mom and they got off without one.

[20:31 ] We forgive him.

[23:48 ] But then we had the funeral, and then the next day, it's like the dust settles. Everybody goes home, and it's quiet, and the company went home, and Stephen's in the basement working on the computer, and I heard that still small voice say, call the mom. Call her right now and tell her it’s okay to have a happy mother’s day.

[23:48 ] But then we had the funeral, and then the next day,it's like the dust settles. Everybody goes home, and it's quiet, and the company went home, and Stephen's in the basement working on the computer, and I heard that still small voice say, call the mom. Call her right now and tell her it’s okay to have a happy mother’s day.

[00:36:05 ] We just had so much compassion for them because the Saturday after Anna was killed, my husband and I had a conversation and we concluded that they had the harder burden to bear. Their son killed a single mom of two little girls.

[00:47:37 ] And (the judge) said, “Your attorneys have explained to me the meeting and the letters you wrote. And in all my years on the bench, I have never heard of forgiveness. You have restored my enthusiasm for my job.”

About Cathy Harvey:

Cathy Harvey’s adult daughter Anna was riding her bike home from college. Only 2 miles from home, she was on gravel biking against traffic, when a driver got distracted and hit her almost head on. Anna’s daughters were 7 and 10 years old. It was Anna’s birthday. She was 4 classes away from finishing her college degree.

Her face went through the passenger side windshield. Some accounts say she died instantly, another said 15 minutes. A woman stopped and held her hand while she died. A truck driver stopped and said he was a first responder, and told the woman could leave if she liked, he’d take over. He warned her this would be hard. The woman stayed.

Anna’s family did not retaliate with hatred or revenge. They forgave the driver and even became friends with the driver’s entire family, sharing vacations and holidays together.

At the time this episode is released, it will be 11 years since the accident.

Cathy journaled most of the journey. Together, Cathy and the driver’s mother have been speaking about this experience to groups all over the country.

Cathy is working on a memoir. Cathy’s website is titled 

 

from Cathy's Heart

purpose. forgiveness. friendship. hope.

Links mentioned in this episode:

Cathy Harvey:

https://cathyharveypurpose.life/

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Toby Dorr:

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