In this episode, Kathy sits down with Joey Stoneburgh, — a corrections officer, husband, father, and podcast host — for an honest look at childhood, masculinity, mental health, and the reality of working inside Canada’s largest jail. Joey opens up about growing up between two homes, the feeling of not fully belonging, the decisions that could have taken his life in a different direction, and the personal redemption he continues to choose every day.

We dive into fatherhood, boundaries, identity, and the invisible pressures many men carry. Joey shares openly about mental health challenges, testosterone, and the work it takes to stay grounded. His story is one of self-reflection, resilience, connection — and choosing who you want to be, even when early life experiences may pull you in other directions.

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Topics Discussed

• Core values & identity

Joey reflects on honesty, integrity, inclusivity, and humor as foundational to who he is — and how these values led him into law enforcement.

• Working in corrections & mental health

How 13 years in a jail environment impacts a person, the risk of becoming hardened, and the outlets that kept Joey grounded (sobriety, jiu-jitsu, family, meaningful routines).

• Childhood in a split family

Navigating two households, complex family dynamics, feeling like he didn’t fully belong in either, and how those early experiences influenced his teens and early 20s.

• Searching for belonging as a teen

Partying, substance use, risky decisions, and the fine line between becoming an officer or becoming an inmate.

• Religion, symbolism & redemption

The surprising church visit that shifted his perspective, the powerful encounter at work that deepened his belief in good and evil, and the story behind his “redemption” tattoo.

• Boundaries & self-worth

Learning to stop people-pleasing, set limits with friends and family, and step into a stronger sense of self-respect.

• Masculine pressure, drive & self-criticism

Feeling like a failure in his late 20s, the internal pressure to be “the provider,” the battle in his own mind, and how ambition can be both a strength and a struggle.

• Fatherhood & testosterone

How becoming a dad transformed his identity, feeling “off,” low libido, and emotionally overwhelmed during that period, and his history of anabolic steroid use.

• Masculinity, mentorship & mixed messages

Outdated gender expectations, exposure to pornography, confusing early guidance from elders, and how culture shapes boys’ understanding of manhood.

• Fears for today’s society

The tension around motherhood, gender roles, and why he believes children need present, emotionally engaged parents.

• What he wants to model for his daughter

Presence, healthy masculinity, emotional availability, and the kind of father who gives his daughter a strong blueprint for future relationships.

Guest Bio

Joey Stoneburgh was born in Huntsville, Ontario, and now lives in Edmonton, Alberta, with his wife and daughter — the two people who ground and inspire him most. He has spent 13 years working as a Corrections Officer at the Edmonton Remand Centre, Canada’s largest jail. Outside of work, Joey stays active through Jiu-Jitsu and weight training, and he hosts a podcast where he interviews people from all walks of life. At his core, Joey values honesty, integrity, inclusivity, laughter, and genuine connection.

Links

https://www.youtube.com/@Sparebedroomstudios

https://www.instagram.com/joeystoneburgh/

https://www.facebook.com/joey.stoneburgh/

Learn more @sonhoodcoaching.com

Raising Boys Who Become Remarkable Men: Intentionally Parenting Your Son from Birth to 8. Grab your copy today.

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Why Season 3 Is Different

Too many boys today feel lost, alone, and misunderstood. And far too often, the same is true for their parents.

Behind the troubling statistics is a generation of boys quietly longing to be seen, heard, and valued — yet the conversation around boys’ emotional lives remains far too quiet.

Season 3 of Unlocking the Parenting Code is here to change that.

In this new season, you’ll hear:

🔹 Real conversations with young men who are ready to share their truth.

🔹 Powerful insights from experts in boys’ mental and emotional health.

🔹 And raw, real wisdom from dads who are walking this road every day

🔹 Solo episodes where I reflect on what I’ve witnessed, wrestled with, and learned

At the heart of this season — and at the heart of Sonhood Coaching — is a mission:

To understand the inner emotional world of boys, to recognize the very real challenges they face, and to name the damaging myths and societal expectations that continue to shape how we see, treat, and raise our sons.

This is not about fixing boys.

It’s about truly seeing them — and learning how to show up differently, with compassion, courage, and connection.

Together, we’re building a world where boys feel safe to be their authentic selves.

Because when we get it right for our boys, we begin to heal something much bigger.