Sonder and Realization that All People Have Deep Complex Life Experiences
Description
In episode 43, the hosts discuss the concept of sonder, a neologism coined by John Koenig in 2012 in his blog The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows. A word with no etymology per se, the episode unpacks the word’s meaning, origins, and how it applies to daily life.
Key Points:
- Definition and Origin:
"Sonder" is defined as the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own, with their own ambitions, routines, and worries. The word is a recent invention (neologism) and, while it may draw on French and German roots, it was created specifically to fill a gap in English vocabulary. - Clarifying Usage:
The hosts clarify that "sonder" is not about being the main character in your own story, but about recognizing that everyone else is the main character in theirs. You are just a minor figure in the vast, intricate stories of others. - Examples and Misconceptions:
The hosts discuss personal anecdotes-such as interactions in a Costco line and reactions to commercials-to distinguish between experiencing sonder and simply reflecting on your own perspective. True sonder involves actively considering the complexity of others’ lives, not just your own role in their stories. - Practical Application:
The conversation highlights that experiencing sonder can lead to greater empathy, patience, and understanding-especially in situations like driving, where it’s easy to forget that other people have their own urgent reasons and challenges. - Cultural Impact:
The word "sonder" is not yet found in official dictionaries but is gaining traction online and in popular culture. It resonates with people who appreciate the philosophical idea that everyone’s life is rich and complicated, even if we only glimpse it in passing.
Conclusion:
The episode uses "sonder" to explore the depth of human experience and the value of recognizing other people’s inner worlds. By understanding sonder, listeners are encouraged to approach daily interactions with more empathy and awareness.
Find more about sonder, the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, and John Koenig here: https://www.thedictionaryofobscuresorrows.com/concept/sonder
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Any views expressed on this podcast are those solely of the hosts and is for entertainment purposes only. None of the content is medical advice or financial advice.
Special thanks to Tim Wright aka CoLD SToRAGE for his permission to use the song Operatique.




