(keywords) (slightly edited version)  Disinclination to teach, Brahma, unawakened state, but a little dust in their eyes, dana parami, transforming virtues, foundational, meditation, wisdom, supportive conditions, conceptual understanding, transformative understanding, relationship, kalyanamitta, helping hand, pointers, Ajahn Chah, lost in anxiety, fear, brains bursting, empathy, gift, loneliness, cold-heartedness, first book, first meditation retreat, disciplining attention, deluded personality, self obsessed, instilling virtues, Wester traveller, offering respect to the Buddha, practices, adequate examples, susceptibility, fully blown narcissists, mainlining bhava tanha, opening, softening, ‘my way’, lonely, self-referencing, forgetting about yourself, gentling, kathina, anumodana, form and spirit, shared participation.