Don’t poo-poo this podcast. We’re making a movement that is wiping up the competition!

How can you be over the age of thirty, yet still have no idea as to the proper way to wipe your own ass? You might think it’s a given, but there’s a great debate amongst the Everything Is Stupid cast about the correct, proper, and sensible way to do so! Do you go from the front? The back? Standing up? On your head? And what’s the best way to take a leak? Over the fence? Through the gate? Piss your pants?

Also, the boys get some weird news about a botched kidnapping. All sorts of hilarity will ensue from that, obviously… Right? How could it possibly be awkward or sad?

Before they wrap it up, Greg, Casey, and Adam imagine how awesome it would be to be gay, from a straight man’s point of view. Hell, we hope that, in this day and age, it’s also awesome from a gay man’s point of view!

It’s also the first on-location the crew has ever done! They thought it would be interesting to see how much the average beer-swilling American knows about being American. Armed with a sample of questions asked on a citizenship test, the boys head to a local bar to see if the average American could past the test to become an average American. The results will absolutely surprise you!

Enjoy this week of podcasting gold!