She never really believed in Santa. She does now.

by ErinPage, Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories.

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I never believed in Santa, well almost never. Not that I was ever a good little girl mind you. Still, Santa was pushed on me as a child. My parents force fed me old Claymation cartoons like Rudolph and Santa Clause is coming to town. Don’t get me wrong, I love the Christmas season, there is definitely something magical about it. Why my parents got all nostalgic with different Christmas movies was beyond my comprehension.

I remember one Saturday morning bright and early my parents dressed me in an itchy red dress with red tights. The little black patent leather shoes hurt my feet something awful. They were taking me to see Santa at the mall. They were so excited. Their eyes twinkled and they couldn’t stop smiling and telling me how excited they were.

 They constantly tried bribing me to get me to act the way they wanted. This just felt like another one of those tools. Yeah, I’m damaged and bitter about it. They must have asked me a thousand times what I wanted for Christmas.

I told them and sure enough that’s the toy I got Christmas morning. The only problem was I had stumbled across all the gifts in moms closet a few weeks before Christmas.

The next year I tested the myth by mailing a letter to Santa, telling him what I wanted for Christmas. I told no one and wasn’t’ surprised or even disappointed I didn’t get what I had asked for. The creepy old man who watches you when you’re sleeping, to scare young children into behaving in a particular way; well it’s just grooming us to be sheep. He didn’t get twelve months of probation when he broke into MY house. Yeah, I was over it.

Fast forward a few years to when I was fifteen. My dad was in the Marine Corps. So, growing up we moved around a lot. My personality style was more the lone wolf type so I never really had friends. The Local VA had put up a sign looking for people who would babysit Christmas eve for mom’s who worked third shift while their husbands were deployed. It was suggested by my juvenile probation officer that I maybe show some initiative and “Volunteer”, to show that I was turning over a new leaf. It was also going to take three months off my probation, but no need to think about that. I took a class on Babysitting and another on CPR and signed up.

Somehow, I ended up watching my aunt Glinda’s kids. I mean I was surprised to learn she was in the program. I had never thought that maybe someone I knew needed help. Anyway, she was working third shift and her husband was deployed to Iraq. It was actually really nice to have her kids. I already knew them, and they really were little angels. They were all full of the yes ma'ams and yes pleases. They said thank you and picked up their own messes without being told. Hell, they cooked me dinner. They even got ready and put themselves to bed. This was going to be a super easy fifty bucks.

That night really did have a Christmassy feel to it. The house was modestly decorated. They had a real Christmas tree with colored blinking lights and homemade ornaments. The smell of pine wafted through the house every time a gust of wind blew. I looked out the window and the world had been transformed. The snow was still falling steadily. They lived in an old farmhouse that needed much repair. The smell and heat from the wood stove made me feel warm and comfortable. With the wind gusting the house made all kinds of strange noises and it made it difficult to fall asleep. It felt much more spooky than it did festive once the lights were out.

That night while I was sleeping, I was awakened by a loud noise in the living room. As I lay there listening, I could hear the wind whistling and the squeaky old floors groaning with what sounded like heavy foot falls. Quick as a flash I got up out of bed and retrieved the Louisville slugger I had received for my eighth birthday. I never did like baseball, but I found the bat comforting when I was babysitting in bad areas. I crept into the room and to my dismay there was a man in a red suit messing around under the tree. Shit, I thought. We are getting robbed by Santa. There had been several reports that year of a homeless man breaking into houses and stealing gifts. This family was poor enough they didn’t need this donut puncher taking what little they had. So I choked up on the bat, crept across the room as quickly and quietly as I could manage. To my delight he never heard me. My dad would have been proud. In true Bruce Willis fashioned I swung with all my might crying out, Merry Christmas mother fucker. Just before I connected he turned and I saw his face. His cheeks were rosy and there was a twinkle in his eye as he smiled. He then laid the finger of his right hand on his nose. My dad was a marine and had always told me to swing through what I was trying to hit. I did, but when the bat connected with nothing. I ended up spinning wildly out of control ending up ass over tea kettle, my mind not willing to believe what my eyes had just witnessed. The man had evaporated into thin air.

In shock, I searched the house from top to bottom several times. Sleep was lost on me that night. I thought about calling the police but, who the hell was going to believe me. When my aunt got home and the kids got up they were so excited for their new toys.

My aunt thanked me repeatedly for giving the gifts from Santa. She was so thankful and said it was a nice touch and she gave me an extra twenty bucks.

I just stood there with my mouth gaping, still wondering if I had gone stark raving mad.

I spent the next three years trying to prove my sanity. I began babysitting for as many kids who had deployed family as much as possible. Then I made my own good and bad list. The bad kids were quickly crossed off my list. Then with my list of good kids I let all the parents know I was available Christmas eve till Christmas morning.

That next year when I was sixteen, I had my pick of the litter so to speak. I baby sat for a little girl who I was sure someday would be a saint. I waited up the whole night but despite all the energy drinks, I ended up falling asleep. I didn’t see him but there were mysterious gifts the next morning that were attributed to me. I was repeatedly thanked by the family for my generosity.

The following year I actually did see him. After the kids were in bed I had picked up the house quick. It was only a little after midnight so I had run to the bathroom to do my business. When I walked back in the living room he was just there. He nodded and smiled warmly, then put his finger next to his nose. He winked just before disappearing. It felt like he knew I was there. I was distracted when he had shown up and it seemed almost like he had waited just long enough for me to see him.

The next year I was eighteen. I just had a feeling this was going to be the year. Then the mother I was sitting for came home early and so I was sent home before he came. That’s when I decided I needed to be a bit stealthier and craftier about the whole matter.

I have a sister who is two years younger than me, she is a saint compared to me. I am the tom boy; she is the princess. She also started doing the baby-sitting gig for Christmas only she doesn’t charge. Yeah, she is one of those. I figured the old man was probably watching my every move in his magic snowball or whatever he used to spy on people. Then I had an idea, I think I may have just discovered a loophole.

Now that I was nineteen, I told the VA I wasn’t going to be able to babysit this year. Next, I booked a Christmas Eve flight to Miami at 11:30 pm. I was very vocal about it and told everyone every chance I could get that I was headed someplace warmer for Christmas.

I packed up on the 24th, then went and sat at the airport. Just about the time they started boarding my flight the weatherman came on the local news station and said that NORAD was tracking Santa’s flight. I didn’t know if it was real, the NORAD tracking him part, but I figured Santa had to be in the in air by then.

I told the airline I had a family emergency and so wasn’t going to be able to make my flight. I called my sister and told her I was going to buy them all dinner and have it delivered. She gave me the address where she was sitting. It was Gunny Miller’s place and I knew it well. I stopped and got pizza then drove to the house.

She was surprised and I told her I came to spend Christmas with her and help her with the kids. The kids were already in bed of course. I smiled at my plan; I had a feeling it was going to work. You see I figured if Santa was traveling, he wouldn’t know what I had just done. So, I figured he had no idea what I had planned. This time I was ready. Just after midnight my sister headed off to the guest room. I told her I would just crash on the couch. I set up my go pro video camera and settled in under a blanket on the couch. I was going to prove to myself that I had really been seeing him. Then maybe I could use the video to blackmail him. There is stuff a girl my age needs, and that stuff isn’t cheap. So then I waited.

And wait I did.