Beyond Belief: Tales of Religious Exodus

In this episode of Beyond Belief we hear from Aysha, an ex-Muslim woman who shares her personal journey of leaving Islam. Raised in a moderately conservative Muslim family in New York City, Aysha discusses her multicultural upbringing and the pivotal moments that led her to question and eventually depart from her faith. The conversation delves into the intellectual and emotional challenges she faced during her transformation, including her experiences at university, where the events of 9/11 and reading the Quran in English profoundly impacted her beliefs. Aysha also touches on the complexities of balancing familial relationships while hiding her true beliefs and navigating life with a non-Muslim partner. As the Director of Operations for Ex-Muslims of North America, Aysha offers insights into the organization's mission and the societal challenges ex-Muslims face, advocating for the importance of free speech and criticism of religion.00:26 Guest's Upbringing and Cultural Background02:34 Comparing Religious Practices13:06 The Impact of 9/11 on Muslim Identity15:56 Questioning Religious Texts24:55 The Journey to Leaving Islam35:06 Finding Community After Leaving Religion39:30 Personal Transformation and Family Dynamics40:41 Critique of Religious Mindset43:32 Islamophobia and Anti-Muslim Bigotry46:28 Challenges of Ex-Muslim Advocacy51:06 Navigating Personal and Family Relationships01:02:46 Radicalization and Religious Conservatism01:08:29 Advice for Ex-Muslims and Conclusion

In this conversation we meet with Sammy, creator of Haram Doodles, as she discusses the significance of Ex-Muslim Month and shares personal experiences growing up as a South Asian Muslim immigrant. The dialogue explores the complexities of cultural and religious identity, the impact of immigration on religious practices, and the evolution of Islam in the West. Sammy reflects on her journey of deconstruction, the role of education, and the influence of relationships on belief systems. The conversation emphasizes the importance of humor and art as mediums for healing and expression, as well as the challenges faced by ex-Muslims in their communities. Ultimately, it highlights the need for activism and community building among ex-Muslims.Resources:Haram Doodles websiteExMuslim.meExMuslim Awareness Month

In this episode we talk with Rachel about her journey out of the fundamentalist Jewish community she was raised in. Rachel reflects on growing up between Israel and Canada, her involvement as an outreach professional through Aish HaTorah, and the pressures of strict religious expectations. She discusses the challenges of navigating her role as a woman within Orthodox society - extricating her own identity from that of being a wife, mother, and community leader, and the struggles around the treatment of women within the confines of Jewish law and society.Resources:CultishA little bit cultyUnculturedTimestamps:00:19 Meet Rachel01:40 Deciding to Share Her Story03:48 Rachel's Upbringing and Family Background06:39 Navigating Dual Worlds: Israel and North America18:12 Early Struggles with Religious Beliefs30:44 The Role of Modesty and Family Purity38:23 Struggling with Conformity39:27 Rebellious Acts and Consequences40:56 Navigating Teenage Relationships41:45 The Journey to Marriage45:45 Family Purity and Religious Practices54:06 Parenting in Orthodox Judaism01:03:53 The Stillbirth Experience01:11:54 Community Support and Reflection01:14:43 The Cult's Structure and Recruitment Tactics01:16:07 Personal Reflections on Cult Involvement01:16:50 Questioning Orthodox Beliefs01:18:33 Comparing Cult Leaders01:23:36 The Deconstruction Process01:29:55 Life After Leaving the Cult01:37:48 Advice for Others Leaving Cults01:41:54 Final Thoughts and Reflections

In this episode, Shalom examines the historical divergence between Judaism as a religious-cultural tradition and Zionism as a modern nationalist project. He traces how Zionism emerged in 19th-century Europe among largely secular Jewish thinkers who reframed Jewish identity around territory, statehood, and political power, often in contrast to the ethical, diasporic, and spiritual foundations of Judaism. Through historical examples, Shalom explains how Zionism borrowed from European colonial ideologies while Judaism had long defined itself without sovereignty or land. He also explores the topic of anti-semitism vs. anti-Judaism, and the racist undertones underlying ethnic nationalism.Additional resources can be found on Freidom Fighter.Show Notes:00:00 Introduction and Podcast Context01:52 Defining Zionism and Personal Background05:05 Historical Context of Jewish Identity09:14 Jewish Revolts and Roman Rule12:57 Evolution of Jewish Identity in Exile23:27 Rise of Antisemitism and Zionism35:38 Colonial Destruction by French and British35:48 Zionist Elitism and Disregard for Middle Eastern Jews36:44 Zionist Attitudes During the Holocaust37:31 Jewish Resistance and Terror Groups38:05 Formation of the Israeli Defense Forces40:03 The Pragmatism of Zionism44:13 Early Jewish Settlers and Forced Conversions47:16 The Holocaust's Role in Zionism's Success47:56 British Rule and the Rise of Palestinian Identity56:07 Zionist Justifications and Propaganda01:05:48 The 1948 War and Its Aftermath01:07:21 The Moral Superiority Narrative01:10:31 Palestinian Mistakes and Perfectionism01:11:47 The Inflexibility of Palestinian Sentiments01:12:08 Criticism of Palestinian Support for Terror01:12:41 Historical Context: PLO vs Hamas01:14:18 The Cycle of Hatred and Victimhood01:16:05 Israel's Military Actions and International Perception01:17:20 The Role of the US and Christian Zionism01:21:40 The Two-State Solution and Demographic Concerns01:22:51 The Need for Reparations and Compromise01:33:04 The Impact of Trump's Policies on Israel01:40:24 The Importance of Being on the Right Side of History

In this episode of Beyond Belief, Mike returns to discuss his journey out of Zionism, mirroring his earlier departure from fundamentalist religion. The conversation delves into the historical nuances and personal struggles faced during the deconstruction of deeply held beliefs about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. Mike shares his experiences in the Israeli military, pivotal moments of realization about Zionist ideologies, and the challenges of dealing with the fallout within his community. The discussion addresses the emotional weight, the intellectual rigor, and the new sense of moral alignment found on the other side. The episode also includes practical advice for those undergoing similar journeys and recommends resources for further research.Additional ResourcesBOOKSBeing Jewish After the Destruction of Gaza — Peter BeinartThe Hundred Years' War on Palestine — Rashid KhalidiPerfect Victims — Mohammed El-KurdOne Day Everyone Will Have Always Been Against This — Omar El AkkadPODCASTSMakdisi StreetThe Beinart NotebookBad HasbarahDisillusionedTimestamps00:22 Parallels Between Religion and Zionism00:52 Mike's Personal Journey02:44 Leaving Religion vs. Leaving Zionism07:24 Growing Up in a Non-Zionist Household17:36 Military Service and Disillusionment23:06 Leaving Israel and Initial Views on Zionism27:15 The Turning Point: October 7th40:03 Unjust Proposals and Victim Blaming40:38 Historical Analogies and Personal Anecdotes42:11 Zionist Narratives and Realizations49:43 Emotional and Intellectual Reckoning59:00 Activism and Community Support01:00:48 Hope and Future Perspectives01:13:51 Resources and Recommendations

In this episode of Beyond Belief, Shalom speaks with author Carl, who grew up in the little-known religion of Christian Science. Carl describes a childhood shaped by the belief that matter is unreal, illness is a mistaken thought, and negative emotions must be suppressed to “reflect God.” He shares the contradictions inside the faith—parents who quietly take children to doctors while insisting sickness isn’t real, funerals avoided to deny death, and a community where secrecy becomes a survival skill. He reflects on leaving the religion, the role that travel and language learning played in broadening his worldview, and how writing became the vehicle for healing and understanding his past. His first novel features characters shaped by Christian Science, allowing him to examine the psychological cost of denying reality and emotion. Carl's website: https://carlvonderau.com/Timestamps:00:18 Carl's Religious Background00:56 Understanding Christian Science04:42 Theological Discussions and Comparisons09:35 Growing Up with Contradictions16:37 Questioning and Breaking Away21:17 College and Drifting Away27:03 Life After Religion29:40 Language and Perception31:23 Christian Science Around the World32:21 The Rise and Fall of Christian Science33:28 Personal Stories of Religious Leaders34:36 Reconciling with Christian Science37:03 Writing and Creative Process43:17 Advice on Broadening Perspectives45:30 Bright Siding and Positive Thinking54:41 Final Reflections and Contact Information

In this episode of Beyond Belief, Shalom speaks with Nushuz, a former Sunni Muslim from Pakistan who writes under a pen name for her safety. Nushuz shares her journey growing up in a highly educated yet deeply patriarchal household, navigating contradictions between modern life and rigid religious norms. Her path out of Islam began through sincere devotion until she ultimately realized she no longer believed. She describes the emotional unraveling of deconstruction, the danger of speaking out, and the complex realities of blasphemy laws in Pakistan. Now a scientist living in the U.S., Nushuz has found healing and community among other ex-religious voices and continues her activism through writing. Her published book, Born a Burden: Breaking Free from Islam, Tradition, and Silence, intertwines her story with those of others leaving conservative Islam, offering both critique and hope for life beyond belief.ResourcesBook:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FPYGHGBJSubstack Blog: https://nushuz.substack.com/Research based articles: https://medium.com/@nushuzauthorHaram doodles: https://haramdoodles.com/ Timestamps00:18 Meet Nushuz: The Story Behind the Pseudonym02:35 Growing Up Sunni Muslim in Pakistan03:54 The Complexities of Sunni and Shia Beliefs06:35 Questioning Religious Teachings14:33 The Role of Women in Islam20:39 The Journey to Apostasy23:12 The Struggle of Leaving Religion37:03 Finding New Paths and Community40:48 The Courage to Speak Out42:25 Blasphemy and Apostasy in Pakistan47:26 The Hijab Debate in Western Societies52:59 Critiquing Religion and Finding Community58:01 Writing and Activism01:06:35 Final Thoughts and Reflections

Unlike the show's typical format of interviewing people who have left fundamentalist religions, this episode explores Dr. Mark Banschick's expertise on narcissism, child development, integrative medicine, and the intersection of psychology and spirituality.Dr. Banschick discusses the nature of high-control narcissistic systems found in various organizations, including religious groups, and how they can emotionally and psychologically impact individuals. He emphasizes the importance of personal boundaries and the dangers of enmeshment, sharing his insights on the dynamics between leaders and followers. Towards the end, Dr. Banschick shares a poem reflecting on his own experiences, offering a personal touch to the theoretical discussion.Resources mentioned:It’s Not You by Ramani Durvasula.The Wrong Way Home by Arthur J. DeikmanDr. Banschick's Website 00:19 Meet Dr. Mark Banschick: Expertise in Psychology and Spirituality03:02 Understanding Narcissistic Systems06:06 The Role of Narcissistic Leaders10:01 The Impact of Charisma and Narcissism17:21 Navigating Personal Growth and Cult Dynamics32:50 The Vulnerability of Young Adults40:03 Navigating Adulthood and Religion40:36 Respect in Therapy42:26 Parental Influence and Differentiation43:25 Understanding Family Systems Theory47:30 Cults and Differentiation49:08 Narcissism and Enmeshment54:24 The Narcissist's Suffering58:52 The Story of Echo and Narcissus01:02:25 A Reflective Poem01:11:34 Advice for Healing from Narcissistic Enmeshment

In this episode, we feature the podcast's first Buddhist interviewee. Kacy shares her unique journey from being raised in a culturally Buddhist family in Taiwan, moving to Canada, and ultimately living in a Buddhist monastery. She discusses her experiences with the religion's teachings, the challenges she faced, and the profound impact it had on her life. Kacy also explores her interest in Christianity and how her work with hospice patients influenced her spiritual outlook. She emphasizes the importance of finding personal meaning, feeling supported, and following one's intuition in navigating religious and spiritual paths.00:18 Meet Kacy : Our First Buddhist Interviewee01:11 Kacy's Early Life and Buddhist Upbringing02:15 The Shift to Traditional Buddhism04:16 Parental Influence and Buddhist Practices10:12 Teenage Years and Increased Buddhist Involvement18:33 A Year in a Buddhist Monastery24:44 Leaving the Monastery and Facing Backlash28:53 Reintegration and Questioning Buddhism32:54 Navigating Boundaries with Religion35:07 The Role of Buddhism in My Life38:08 Repentance and Its Impact43:30 Exploring Christian Teachings48:11 Advice for My Younger Self49:23 Healing from the Past53:49 Finding Meaning and Support

In the 21st episode of the Beyond Belief podcast series, Aviva shares her deeply personal journey of leaving an ultra-Orthodox Jewish upbringing. The episode delves into her upbringing in Israel, her intellectual and emotional struggles with religious beliefs, her process of dealing with deeply ingrained notions of morality and individuality, and the gradual and challenging transition out of religion. The conversation touches on her relationship with her parents, especially her father, who was a significant influence on her beliefs, and her path towards finding new meaning and identity post-religion. Aviva offers unique insights and advice for others undergoing similar experiences, emphasizing the importance of trusting one's innate goodness and internal guidance mechanisms.00:00 Introduction to Beyond Belief00:54 Aviva's Religious Upbringing02:54 Parental Influence and Religious Practices06:45 Questioning and Early Signs of Doubt11:30 The Turning Point: Leaving Religion14:35 Navigating Life After Religion17:54 Finding Meaning and Healing27:33 Reflections and Advice for Others43:19 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

In this episode of Beyond Belief, Tales of Religious Exodus, we interview Nourah and Moe, a couple from Saudi Arabia who grew up in deeply religious Muslim families near Mecca. They share their personal journeys out of Islam, the cultural pressures they faced, and the transition to life in Canada, where they found freedom and a chance to rediscover themselves. The couple discusses the emotional toll of leaving their religion, facing family disownment, and the challenges of adjusting to a new life while searching for the truth. Despite the immense risks, they have rebuilt their lives and found happiness in their newfound autonomy, providing invaluable insights and advice for others on a similar path.00:19 Meet Nourah and Moe: A Unique Couple00:52 Growing Up in Saudi Arabia01:42 Religious Upbringing and Family Expectations06:13 Daily Religious Practices12:25 Gender Roles and Restrictions18:04 Personal Relationship with Religion29:54 Marriage Expectations and Realities51:48 Planning a Future Beyond Saudi Arabia55:51 Escaping Toxic Environments56:33 Exploring Life Beyond Saudi Arabia58:20 Women's Struggles in Conservative Societies01:00:44 Adapting to Life in Canada01:05:11 Questioning Religious Practices01:10:15 Personal Religious Journeys01:20:05 Challenges of Leaving Religion01:30:33 Life After Religion01:36:42 Family Reactions and Safety Concerns01:42:14 Final Reflections and Advice

In this episode of 'Beyond Belief, Tales of Religious Exodus,' host Shalom welcomes River, a psychotherapist, to share their deeply personal journey of leaving the evangelical missionary church of Canada. River discusses the strict religious upbringing as a pastor's child in Kitchener, Ontario, dealing with the trauma of family life, and the impact of a personal tragedy catalyzed their questioning of faith. They explore the challenges of deconstructing ingrained beliefs, the importance of new supportive relationships, and the journey towards self-compassion and self-acceptance. Through therapy and a shift towards Eastern philosophies, River illustrates the profound transformation from deeply embedded religiosity to a path of authenticity and healing. 00:00 Introduction to Beyond Belief 00:19 Meet River: A Psychotherapist's Perspective 00:53 River's Religious Upbringing 01:38 Core Beliefs of the Evangelical Missionary Church 02:58 Family Dynamics and Religious Expectations 06:10 Struggles with Identity and Belonging 23:47 The Impact of Original Sin 27:53 Marriage and Gradual Deconstruction 30:07 The Reality of Parenting Alone 30:35 Meeting Wife and Religious Journey 31:33 A Life-Altering Tragedy 32:44 Deconstructing Faith and Beliefs 34:40 University Life and Changing Perspectives 37:01 Leaving Religion Completely 42:25 Parenting Challenges and Personal Growth 47:13 Healing and New Relationships 49:31 Advice for Those on a Deconstruction Journey 51:00 Reflecting on Life Choices and Parenting 01:00:12 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

In this episode of 'Beyond Belief: Tales of Religious Exodus,' we follow Esther's compelling journey from spending her childhood in China and Canada as a missionary child in Pentecostal and Mennonite communities, to her deconversion during the pandemic. Esther shares the challenges of navigating contrasting religious environments, her experience of missionary work, the conflicting teachings on purity, and how the political climate and her sister's coming out influenced her path to identifying as spiritual but not religious. Along her journey, she finds healing through therapy, a supportive relationship with her husband, and the courage to embrace a life beyond entrenched religious dogma. 00:00 Introduction to Beyond Belief 00:19 Esther's Early Life and Religious Background 01:56 Missionary Work and Cultural Contrasts 06:18 Pentecostal and Mennonite Beliefs 09:02 Family Dynamics and Personal Struggles 14:06 Transition to Life in Canada 24:12 Navigating Relationships and Personal Growth 27:43 Shared Values and Deconstructing Christianity 28:26 Pandemic Conversations and Personal Revelations 29:22 Questioning Sin and Social Justice 29:43 Political Disillusionment and Church Attendance 32:43 Struggles with Purity Culture 36:50 Leaving Religion and Finding Support 40:03 Therapy and Self-Compassion 41:57 Cultural Contexts and Hypocrisy 48:06 Final Reflections and Advice

In this episode, we explore Nick's transition from a religious upbringing in Orthodox Judaism to a secular life filled with exploration and self-discovery. The episodes cover a range of experiences and themes, from the global moves from Ottawa to Brussels, the struggle with religious education and personal faith, and the challenges faced within a strict community. Personal stories highlight their shift away from orthodoxy, struggles with societal and familial expectations, and the quest for authenticity and self-trust amid a conservative upbringing. Topics of sexual identity, mental health, and personal empowerment are deeply explored, alongside the significance of building an online community and the liberating symbolism of motorcycling. This episode delves into overcoming adversity, questioning longstanding beliefs, and the continuous journey toward personal liberation and mental resilience. Here's a photo of Nick before and after his journey. 00:21 Guest Introduction and Background 00:41 Life in Israel and Religious Education 02:37 Struggles with Religious Beliefs 09:01 Leaving Religion and Finding Community 13:21 Adjusting to a New Life 21:08 Reflections and Final Thoughts 30:09 Choosing the Right Books for Personal Growth 31:18 Blocking Out Distractions: Social Media and YouTube 32:25 The Power of Writing Down Your Thoughts 33:29 Is It Worth It? The Struggle of Leaving Religion 34:26 Questioning Religious Teachings and Practices 35:52 Navigating Life as a Bisexual in a Religious Community 39:43 Family Reactions to Leaving Religion and Being Bisexual 43:44 Advice for Those Questioning Their Faith 47:37 The Dilemma of Returning to a Religious Community 56:54 Reflecting on Personal Growth and Freedom

In this episode of 'Beyond Belief, Tales of Religious Exodus,' we explore Jayson's personal journey out of Orthodox Judaism. Growing up in a religious household in Brooklyn, Jason describes his upbringing as Yeshivish modern and details the nuances of his family dynamics and religious practices. At the age of 20, he began to question his beliefs after exposure to college science courses and noticing inconsistencies within religious texts. Jason shares the challenges of leaving a religion so deeply ingrained in identity and lifestyle, expressing the difficulty of losing a personal connection with God. Despite not fully leaving the religious community, Jayson continues to balance cultural orthodoxy with exploration and new life experiences, offering insights into navigating life with one foot in and one foot out of organized religion. The episode highlights the importance of community and shared experiences when questioning and potentially leaving one's faith. 00:00 Introduction to Beyond Belief 00:42 Jayson's Orthodox Jewish Upbringing 03:12 Cultural Nuances and Family Dynamics 06:04 Questioning Faith and Seeking Answers 08:38 The Journey Through Yeshiva and College 15:44 Struggles with Cognitive Dissonance 26:08 Navigating Graduate School Challenges 27:03 Current Life and Identity 28:10 Marriage and Family Dynamics 29:16 Raising Children with Cultural Values 30:32 Finding Meaning in Rituals 33:22 Balancing Community and Personal Beliefs 36:58 Seeking Belonging and Community 40:13 Exploring Life Beyond Religion 42:24 Reflections on Intellectual and Emotional Journeys 54:25 Final Thoughts and Farewell

This episode of Beyond Belief: Tales of Religious Exodus features Alex, who shares his compelling journey of leaving Orthodox Judaism. Alex discusses his upbringing in a culturally Jewish family, his deep involvement with 12-step recovery programs, and his extensive exploration of various Orthodox sects. He describes a pivotal moment in December 2022 that led him to leave the community and begin a profound deconstruction process. Alex explores the practices and communities that helped him heal, including meditation, trauma-informed therapy, and unconventional 12-step meetings. The episode delves into the complexities of finding authenticity and meaning beyond rigid religious boundaries. 00:00 Introduction to Beyond Belief 01:43 Alex's Early Life and Religious Upbringing 03:06 Struggles with Addiction and Recovery 05:58 First Encounter with Orthodox Judaism 10:59 Immersion in Orthodox Study and Community 25:35 Conflicts and Doubts about Orthodox Beliefs 29:04 Struggles with Gender and Faith 29:47 Meditation and Jewish Practices 30:46 Gender Roles and Responsibilities in Judaism 31:48 Questioning Jewish Ancestry and Practices 32:43 Critique of Religious Texts and Leaders 35:25 Journey Through Different Jewish Sects 38:40 The Final Straw and Deconstruction 42:58 Finding New Paths and Healing 53:13 Advice for Others in Deconstruction 54:13 Closing Thoughts and Future Plans

In this episode of 'Beyond Belief,' the show delves into transformative personal journeys away from traditional religious beliefs. The segment features Rami, who shares his path from a culturally Islamic upbringing in Los Angeles to becoming a vocal ex-Muslim advocate. He discusses the social and familial challenges he faced, his intellectual awakening, and his efforts with his nonprofit, 'Uniting the Cults,' to promote scientific thinking over religious dogma. 00:00 Introduction to Beyond Belief: Tales of Religious Exodus 00:17 Rami's Background and Initial Thoughts on Islam 03:30 The Journey to Becoming an Ex-Muslim 05:35 Philosophical and Theological Explorations 07:00 Engaging with the Ex-Muslim Community 10:28 Personal Reflections on Morality and Religion 16:20 Rami's Intellectual and Emotional Evolution 31:19 The Role of Rationality and Love in Rami's Life 36:26 Rami's Nonprofit and Advocacy Work 37:12 Uniting the Cults: A Mission Beyond Apostasy 38:10 Understanding Apostasy Laws in Islam 40:26 Personal Suffering and the Impact of Islam 43:39 Helping Ex-Muslims: A Unique Approach 45:26 Philosophy and Science: A Unified Perspective 53:03 The Role of Education in Critical Thinking 01:01:44 Gender Dynamics and Cultural Influences 01:15:06 The Influence of Jewish Thinkers 01:20:17 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

This episode of Beyond Belief, explores the profound journey of Pesi Weinberg, a former Orthodox Jew turned therapist and comedian. Pesi discusses growing up in a strict religious environment, the internal and external conflicts he faced, and his ultimate decision to leave the faith. Through candid conversation, Pesi shares insights into the struggles, triumphs, and the ongoing process of healing that comes with such a significant life change. The discussion also delves into the importance of community, the role of therapy, and the power of self-exploration and acceptance in finding a new path to meaning and fulfillment. 00:00 Introduction to Beyond Belief 00:48 Guest Background and Upbringing 02:23 Parental Influence and Rebellion 07:32 Struggles with Authority and Education 11:48 Journey into Kirov and Marriage 23:53 Disillusionment and Leaving Religion 32:26 Transition to Secular Life in Israel 35:07 Reintegrating into the Religious Community 35:22 Teaching in a Religious School Again 35:52 Struggles with the Orthodox Community 36:27 Involvement in the Ex-Orthodox Community 37:09 Ongoing Identity and Emotional Struggles 38:20 Transition to Therapy and New Career Path 42:07 Understanding and Processing Trauma 56:22 Advice for Those Leaving Orthodoxy 01:01:07 Resources for Support and Healing

In this episode of 'Beyond Belief, Tales of Religious Exodus,' host Shalom shares his journey of leaving Orthodox Judaism in an interview with Aviva. Shalom discusses growing up in a fervently religious family and the intense emotional and mental struggles that accompanied his departure from religion. He reflects on his ongoing healing process, the significance of therapy, the importance of intellectual study, and the challenging search for community. Additionally, he opens up about how family dynamics and relationships, including his divorce, have shaped his journey. Shalom now advocates for mental health and critiques fundamentalist practices, offering valuable insights and advice for others considering similar paths of personal growth and religious exodus.01:34 Shalom's Orthodox Jewish Upbringing05:14 Parental Influence and Cultural Divide06:35 Navigating Religious Education08:00 Intersecting Identities and Communities11:46 Parental Relationships with Religion21:51 Struggles with Religious Expectations25:44 Leaving Religion: The Turning Point40:46 Post-Religion Challenges and Healing47:25 Exploring the Modern Workplace47:56 Personal Journey: Leaving Religion48:05 Challenges and Interventions49:00 Resentment and Contradictions51:58 Seeking Understanding and Acceptance54:26 Milestones and Identity59:02 Reflections on Childhood and Education01:07:37 Healing and Community01:14:53 Impact of Relationships01:21:29 Advice for Others Leaving Religion01:26:51 Final Thoughts and Reflections

In this episode of Beyond Belief, Chana shares their unique journey of leaving the Chabad community. Born to Ba'al Teshuva parents who embraced Chabad in their twenties, Hannah's story provides an inside perspective on growing up in a fundamentalist religious setting in Morristown, New Jersey. Chana navigates through the key milestones of losing faith at age 11, rejecting religious doctrine at 14, and leaving home at 19 to pursue higher education. Throughout the episode, themes of questioning, rebellion, and the impacts of an ultra-orthodox upbringing are explored, including the prevalence of childhood sexual trauma in religious communities. Chana 's transition from religious oppression to academia and a creative career as an artist highlights the resilience and support they found outside the confines of Chabad. This episode serves as a beacon of hope and resource for others considering their own journey out of fundamentalist religious settings. 00:00 Introduction to Beyond Belief 00:20 Hannah's Unique Perspective on Chabad 01:19 Growing Up in Morristown 03:18 Losing Faith on Gimel Tamuz 06:33 Questioning and Rebellion 09:18 Leaving Chabad and Pursuing Education 10:43 Challenges and Reflections on Religious Upbringing 19:01 Transition to Academia 26:17 Finding Support and Healing 27:38 Settling in Minnesota 28:07 Neurodivergence and Family 28:36 Ba'al Teshuva Perspectives 32:19 Artistic Journey 33:29 Name and Identity 35:37 Family Dynamics and Religion 38:29 Advice for Leaving Religion 42:17 Host's Background 47:53 Concluding Thoughts