Resiliently Rising Podcast

Episode Summary:In this month’s Somatic Safety Session, we focus on grounding… especially for moments when your system feels scattered, overwhelmed, or disconnected from your body. Betrayal trauma can pull you up and out of the present moment, leaving you feeling floaty, buzzy, or unanchored. In this gentle, trauma-informed practice, Carrie offers simple education about why this happens in the nervous system, followed by a guided grounding experience using the feet and containment. This session is an invitation to come back inside your body, at your own pace, without forcing calm… just creating a little more support and steadiness than before. You’re reminded throughout that your body leads, you can’t do this wrong, and even the smallest shifts matter. Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this What You’re Wondering episode of the Resiliently Rising Podcast, we respond to a listener asking how to survive the “messy middle” of betrayal recovery… when both partners are healing, but neither is fully there yet. We talk honestly about why this phase feels so destabilizing… and why it’s often where the deepest change actually begins. We unpack what real self-care looks like during this season (hint… it’s more about capacity than bubble baths), how boundaries protect healing rather than punish, how to support kids with age-appropriate honesty, and what to watch for when you’re wondering, What if they never change?   Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay  

In this episode of the Resiliently Rising Podcast, Carrie Holladay talks with Tammy Gustafson, LPC - trauma-informed therapist, founder of Betrayal Healing / Live Free Counseling, host of the Betrayal Healing Conference, and author of Broken to Brave: Your Courageous Act of Healing After Intimate Betrayal. Tammy shares her personal betrayal story and what she’s learned from years of helping betrayed partners heal. Together, they unpack why betrayal trauma recovery can’t be rushed, what happens when we try to “forgive and move on” too fast, and why safety… not forced trust… is the true foundation of healing. Tammy also outlines her four phases of betrayal healing, including the “messy middle” and the often-overlooked roommate path when a partner isn’t fully doing the work.   Connect with Tammy: https://www.instagram.com/tammylgustafson/ https://tammygustafson.com/   Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode, Carrie and David talk about why silence after betrayal doesn’t feel neutral…it feels like being left alone in the wreckage. They explore what’s happening in the nervous system for both the betrayed partner and the betrayer, why avoidance can come from fear and shame, and how “not wanting to make it worse” can actually deepen the disconnect. You’ll hear what helps instead…how to initiate check-ins without turning them into conflict, how to stay present with discomfort, and what real repair looks like when it’s built on consistency, honesty, and felt safety rather than performance.   Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Episode Summary: Somatic Safety Session: Come Back Into Your Body | Orienting + Felt Sense Betrayal trauma can pull you out of your body and into survival mode — hypervigilance, overthinking, numbness, or overwhelm. This gentle, trauma-informed somatic practice is designed to help you slowly and safely come back into the present moment. ✨ In this practice, you’ll experience: • Gentle education on how betrayal trauma affects the nervous system • Orienting to help your body recognize safety in the present moment • Felt Sense guidance to reconnect with your body at your own pace • Slow pacing, pause cues, and permission to modify or stop at any time This practice is supportive if you’re healing from betrayal, feeling disconnected from your body, or living in constant alertness. Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this first What You’re Wondering episode, Carrie and David respond to a listener’s question about what happens when there’s a slip or relapse during betrayal healing. They explore why healing isn’t linear, how any return to secrecy or unsafe behavior impacts the nervous system of the betrayed partner, and why arguing over labels matters far less than addressing impact and restoring safety. From both perspectives, they talk honestly about shame, fear, transparency, and repair…and share what actually helps couples navigate these moments with clarity, compassion, and structure. The episode emphasizes that setbacks don’t erase progress…and that trust is rebuilt through honesty, responsibility, and consistent repair, not perfection. Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode, Carrie sits down with licensed clinical nutritionist Devon Ragan to explore what really happens in your gut, hormones, and nervous system when you’ve lived through chronic stress and trauma. Devon shares her own story of burnout and loss, the link between trauma, IBS, autoimmune issues, and “mystery” symptoms, and why so many women are dismissed or misdiagnosed even when their bodies are clearly screaming for help. Together they unpack cortisol, adrenal burnout, cycle syncing, gut health, and how trauma shows up physically... then bring it back to gentle, realistic steps like eating regularly, simple supportive foods, and small nervous system “glimmers” you can build into your day. If you’ve ever felt “crazy” for how off your body feels after betrayal or long term stress... this conversation will help you feel validated, informed, and a little more empowered in your own body. Connect with Devon: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/devon.ragan.nutritionist/ https://www.devonragan.com/   Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!    🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Episode Summary: In this episode, Carrie and David unpack why so many communication breakdowns aren’t actually about saying the wrong thing… they’re about what’s happening in the nervous system. They explain what happens in the brain and body during conflict, why survival responses like fight, flight, shutdown, and fawn take over, and how betrayal trauma adds another layer of sensitivity and fear to communication. You’ll learn why traditional communication tools often fail when safety is missing, how nervous system regulation creates access to empathy and clarity, and what regulated communication actually looks like before, during, and after hard conversations. Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8  🌻 Betrayal Healing Conference: https://betrayalhealingconference.com/?affiliate=healwithcarrie     👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

If you’ve ever wondered, “Why can’t I calm down? Why can’t I feel safe? Why does my body feel like it’s always bracing?” — this episode will finally give you the answers your nervous system has been trying to tell you. Carrie and David break down the three core things every nervous system needs to feel grounded… and how betrayal shatters each one. You’ll learn why your brain won’t stop spinning, why your sense of choice feels ripped away, why connection feels so complicated after betrayal, and what it really takes to restore safety in your body again. Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 🔅‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode, Carrie sits down with Dr. Debi Silber, founder of the Post Betrayal Transformation Institute. Together, they explore why betrayal is unlike any other trauma—and what it really takes to move from shock and survival into genuine healing, self-love, and transformation. Debi shares how her own betrayals led to the discovery of the five stages from betrayal to breakthrough, an evidence-based framework now used worldwide.  If you’ve ever wondered, Will I always feel like this?… this conversation offers both language and hope for what’s possible on the other side.   Connect with Debi Silber:  Website: https://thepbtinstitute.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/debisilber/ TEDx: “Do You Have Post Betrayal Syndrome?“: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iyqOR69dHiU   Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus  🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety  🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership ✨Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

In this episode, Carrie and David dive into what it really means for the body to feel safe after betrayal — and why that sense of safety can’t be forced, faked, or found through willpower alone. Through a powerful metaphor, they explore the unseen ways you subconsciously experience safety or danger. They share honest stories from their own healing, moments of tension and tenderness, and insights that help you see why sometimes your body reacts even when your mind says, “everything’s fine.” This conversation will help you understand safety in a deeper, more embodied way — one that invites curiosity, compassion, and the kind of awareness that leads to lasting change.   Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode, we break down denial and betrayal blindness, two common responses in betrayal trauma that can make it hard to recognize what’s happening even when the signs are there. We explore how the nervous system chooses protection and attachment over awareness, and why both the betrayed partner and the partner acting out can struggle to see the truth clearly. We talk about the role of gaslighting, self-betrayal, and attachment needs in creating confusion and self-doubt. You’ll learn how to begin reconnecting to your body’s signals, rebuilding self-trust, and taking the next steps toward clarity and healing.   Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Carrie talks with trauma and addiction psychotherapist Jan Winhall, author of Treating Trauma and Addiction with the Felt Sense Polyvagal Model. They explore how trauma lives in the body, why self-destructive behaviors are survival responses, and how safety—not shame—is the key to healing. Together, they discuss betrayal as a root wound, rebuilding safety in relationships, and how reconnecting with the body helps restore self-trust and connection. Connect with Jan Winhall:📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean 🌀 Website: https://www.fspminstitute.com/   Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode, we unpack what to do when one partner seems “all in” on healing after betrayal and the other looks hesitant. We explore some of the reasons for this mismatch, and you’ll learn three practical moves to navigate it. Note: this conversation is for couples where both partners genuinely want to rebuild; chronic dismissiveness or defensiveness needs a different approach.   Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode of Resiliently Rising, Carrie and David walk through the Gottman Institute’s three-phase Revival Method for healing a relationship after betrayal—Atone, Attune, and Attach. They share how each phase rebuilds trust, emotional connection, and intimacy, weaving in their own lived experience to make the roadmap feel practical and hopeful. Carrie also introduces her new course, Rebuilding Us, which brings these concepts to life with guided somatic practices, partner exercises, and tools for nervous-system-based healing. Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Noticing someone’s attractiveness isn’t betrayal—it’s human biology. In this episode, we unpack the difference between a neutral glance and lingering/objectifying, why the betrayed partner’s nervous system can go on high alert, and how couples can co-regulate in the moment. We share simple tools that rebuild safety through consistent “trust bank” deposits. Hopeful, practical, and research-informed, this conversation shows how repeated safe experiences can rewire fear into trust over time.   Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Episode Summary:In this episode of the Resiliently Rising Podcast, Carrie and David dive into a raw listener question: Can a marriage be repaired without forgiveness or trust returning? Together, they explore the difference between patching a relationship and truly rebuilding, the toll of living in a guarded nervous system state, and why “staying for the kids” may not provide the safety parents hope for. They share personal experiences, research insights, and reflective questions to help you weigh the real cost of staying versus leaving after betrayal. This conversation is both honest and compassionate, offering guidance for anyone sitting in the tension of not being ready to forgive, yet unsure of what comes next. Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode of The Resiliently Rising Podcast, Carrie and David unpack the phrase “once a cheater, always a cheater” and explore why it feels protective—but can actually keep both partners stuck. They share personal insight, the neuroscience behind real change, and a more helpful reframe: “An unhealed cheater will remain an unhealed cheater.” Whether you’ve been betrayed or are working to rebuild trust, this conversation offers hope, honesty, and a grounded path forward. Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising! 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Episode Summary: In this episode, I’m joined by my friend, former colleague, and Trauma Trained Somatic Practitioner, Meg Schnetzer, to talk about why healing in isolation keeps so many of us stuck. We share personal stories, explore the power of being witnessed without judgment, and talk about how co-regulation helps calm shame and fear. This is exactly why we created our group coaching space—to offer the kind of community we wish we had when we started healing. Connect with Meg: 📲 Instagram:@_healwithmeg_ 📲 TikTok: @megschnetzer Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising! 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

In this episode, Carrie and David speak directly to the ones who’ve caused harm—offering an honest, compassionate look at what it means to feel the weight of shame and still choose to grow. They unpack the difference between wanting forgiveness and becoming someone who is ready to receive it, and share personal insights about the quiet, steady work of repair. If you’ve ever wondered how to rebuild trust after betrayal, this conversation is a powerful place to begin. Connect with Me: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety 🌿Membership: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/membership 👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising! 🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay