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The Sex After Kids Podcast
55 Episodes
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Send us a text Why do dads seem to shut down after kids, or push for sex that doesn't feel connected? Dan Doty has spent 20 years working with men and boys in deeply intimate spaces. In this episode, he shares why sex often feels like survival for dads, and why so many men feel emotionally orphaned after becoming parents. If your partner seems checked out or constantly initiating (and you're stuck in resentment, shutdown, or confusion)... this episode is a must. We unpack the unspoken e...
Send us a text If you’re tired of hearing "not tonight," this episode is for you. For the partner who is asking for sex all the time, facing constant rejection feels personal. It chips away at your confidence and makes you want to stop trying altogether. But what if the "no" isn't about you at all? This episode is the final installment of our Perimenopause + Intimacy series, and it's a masterclass in initiation. We explore why your old moves might be backfiring and how to approach your partne...
Send us a text If you've ever found yourself wondering, "Who even am I right now?" - you're not alone. This episode is a must-listen for couples navigating midlife, marriage, and the hormonal rollercoaster known as perimenopause (and andropause — yes, it's a thing). My guest Brooke Davis gets real about how these changes can wreck emotional regulation and connection if we’re not prepared. We talk about: The invisible link between hormones and relationship breakdowns How decent marriages fall...
Send us a text If your partner's libido seems MIA since perimenopause showed up or if you are wondering where your own went, this episode is for you. We're unpacking what's really going on with libido changes in this season, and how to stop treating each other like broken sex robots. This is part 2 of our Perimenopause + Intimacy series, and today's convo includes the science of libido, nervous system safety, responsive vs spontaneous desire, and why your body (or your partner's) might just n...
Send us a text If you're feeling like roommates instead of lovers, perimenopause might be playing a bigger role than you think. Whether you're the higher libido partner waiting for things to "go back to normal," or the one navigating body changes, stress, and zero desire... you're not alone. This episode kicks off our Perimenopause + Intimacy series — and it's packed with practical insights to help you stop spinning in "maybe someday" mode. 🎉 Also, it's our 50th episode! If this podcast...
Send us a text Today we are going deeper into how your stress impacts your relationship, and your intimacy, and what to do about it. We have a special guest interview this week on the podcast with Naturopath Heather Drummond whose speciality is the nervous system. Timestamps: 0:00 - Introduction & Guest Welcome 3:59 - Heather's Background & Nervous System Work 6:43 - Nervous System Responses in Relationships 9:11 - Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn Explained 15:52 - Codependency,...
Send us a text Do you mistake stress or tiredness for a hard no when it comes to intimacy? You’re not alone! In this episode, I unpack the “traffic lights” of the nervous system and how to stop defaulting to NO—so you can discover more ways to say yes (or a real, empowered maybe) to connection after kids. Timestamps & What You’ll Learn: 00:14 – Introduction to Sex After Kids Podcast 00:59 – Understanding Your Nervous System's Traffic Light System 01:24 – Breaking Down the Traffic Light C...
Send us a text Ready to get out of the initiate-and-avoid rut and back to playful, flirty, connected sex - without the pressure? In this special episode, I share why I created The Naked Fun Comeback™, what makes it different from all the "just try harder" advice, and how you can join this summer's case study group. Timestamps: 00:00 – Welcome & why this is a direct invitation episode 02:05 – Why I created The Naked Fun Comeback™ (books and apps don't cut it, and fixing your libido isn't ...
Send us a text Save this one for Saturday night. Follow along during this guided date and see where the evening takes you. In this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast I share a guided date night experience from the Sex After Kids Summit Vault. Follow along as I show you through one of my favourite activities to get you out of busy parent mode and into landed lover mode. These guided date night experiences are a signature part of my Naked Fun Comeback Program where I help lead parents back i...
Send us a text Wondering if you need a sex coach, a couples counsellor, or both? I discuss my honest take on how each one can help, what most couples are really feeling (and why), and why it’s not about “fixing” you or your partner—but learning new skills together. Timestamps & What You’ll Learn: 01:14 – Sex Coach vs Couples Counsellor 03:09 – Common Relationship Struggles 05:03 – Why Most People Need Professional Help 08:23 – Differences Between Sex Coaches and Couples Counselors 11:45 ...
Send us a text Let’s just put it out there: If you’re in a sexless marriage, you’ve probably had at least one “Would this just be easier if we split up?” moment. Maybe you’ve even daydreamed about a solo life—until you remember that modern dating sounds absolutely exhausting. (No, thank you!) If you’re even flirting with the D-word—even in your head—this episode is for you. Because keeping those worries secret just makes things worse, and you are NOT alone. Join Sofia as she busts myths, call...
Send us a text Whether you’re fresh into postpartum or it’s been years since your last baby and your body still feels unfamiliar, you’re not alone. In this episode, I get radically real about intimacy, body image, and feeling sexy in the body you have—right now. What You’ll Learn: 01:08 — Intimacy & Body Image After Kids 01:32 — The Reality of Postpartum Bodies 02:48 — Pressure, Partners, and Self-Criticism 03:52 — Waiting to Feel Sexy & The Cost 04:20 — Spectatoring & Body Neutra...
Send us a text Feeling awkward about intimacy after kids, or stuck in the “roommate rut?” You’re not alone. In this episode, I share why foreplay (and the “pre-game” before it) is the real secret to rekindling connection—and how to make it feel safe, pressure-free, and fun (especially for the lower libido partner). What we cover: 01:06 — Rethinking Foreplay & Getting Started Again 02:11 — Zero Pressure: The Key to Connection 02:36 — Pre-Foreplay: Building Safety & Trust 03:25 — The P...
Send us a text Is scheduled sex really the death of desire…or is it your secret weapon for reigniting connection after kids? In this episode, Sofia (your TMI bedroom advice bestie for parents) busts the myths about putting sex on the calendar—and shows you how to turn obligation into anticipation. What You’ll Learn: 01:07 Debunking the Scheduled Sex Myth 01:21 Why People Resist Scheduling Sex 01:50 Scheduling Creates the Mood 02:28 The Pressure of Scheduled Nights 02:49 Real-Life Example: An...
Send us a text Feeling like “roommates” instead of lovers? You’re not alone. In this episode, I share my absolute favourite sex books that every parent should have on their nightstand—plus the real-life stories and expert tips behind each pick. What you'll learn: The best books for reigniting desire and connection after kids How to talk about sex without shame or awkwardness Why exploring together (or solo!) can spark big changes in your relationship Timestamps: 00:00 — Intro & Podcast W...
Send us a text In this episode I share when my partner and I went to couples counselling after the birth of our first child. From my post-partum anxiety I was experiencing resentment and contempt and didn’t want this to be the theme of our relationship. In this episode I cover: 04:05 Why I hated admitting they needed help 06:12 Why everything wasn’t all my partners fault (much as I wanted it to be) 08:11 Why stress was the root of all our challenges14:45 And why coupl...
Send us a text In this deeply personal episode, I’m sharing the one secret that helped me go from six months of shut-down to regularly saying yes (and even initiating!)—without faking, forcing, or bypassing my body’s needs. My vagina had a tantrum last week and we are going to talk about it. Whether you're the higher libido partner wondering what’s going on behind the “no,” or the lower libido partner who wants connection but feels stuck in shutdown—this episode is for you. In this epis...
Send us a text Feeling resentful, disconnected, or just done with intimacy because you're the one holding everything together? Or maybe you're doing your share—and still hearing that it’s not enough? This episode is for you. We’re diving into the mental load: what it really is, how it impacts your nervous system (and your sex life), and why even splitting things 50/50 doesn’t always fix the spark. Spoiler: doing the dishes isn’t foreplay if you’re not emotionally connected. 👇 In this episode,...
Send us a text Struggling with low desire or no sex after kids? You're not alone—and you're not broken. In this episode of The Sex After Kids Podcast, sex and intimacy coach Sofia from The Happy Vagina Project shares 5 mindset shifts to help couples reconnect, reignite desire, and break out of the dreaded “Not Tonight” cycle. Whether you're feeling touched out, rejected, or just numb to the idea of intimacy, this episode offers practical tools and emotional clarity to bring back passion, play...
Send us a text Ever found yourself thinking, “Why are they always avoiding sex?” Or maybe you’ve felt the sting of rejection and started to question your relationship, your desirability, or your skills in bed. This episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast flips that narrative on its head. We’re diving into the real reasons behind intimacy avoidance—especially after becoming parents. Spoiler: it’s not about being broken or unwanted. We’re talking about stress, nervous system overload, the orgas...



